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Author Topic: Experience In China  (Read 4649 times)

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Offline as99

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Experience In China
« on: October 14, 2007, 10:14:30 AM »
Hi All

Please help me with your suggestion as i am confused about my experience in china. I am 28 years old and on 13.10.2007 i was in shanghai as i have for the biggest trade fair,i met with two gals at a bar one from finland and the other from US. After long chat we ended up in my room aND THE gal from finland went with my room mate. We ended upwith deep kissing she gave me a blow job sucked/licked on my testicles. I fingured her both ways and then also touched my self. All this was without a condom and due to this i  dint have the inter course. We did this twice. After some time me and the finland girl ended up together and the same thing repeated but this one was quite rouch as she bit mewhile giving the blow job.Ya i also gave them a love bite. again no intercourse as no condom. 
I am vaccinated for Hep b and shall be tested for ither sti's but my biggest fear is HIV. i was tested for HIV 9 mths ago as i live in a foriegn country and we nned to do the test once a yesr for visa purpose. I have been with a single person for around 3 years and no multiple sex partners.

Anu suggestion and guidance from your end is highly apprecitaed.

Regards
AS

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #1 on: October 14, 2007, 10:23:13 AM »
If I am reading you correctly, the bottom line in all of what you are reporting is that you did NOT have intercourse during these sessions. If I'm correct about that then you have nothing to be concerned about as far as HIV is concerned.

None of the activities you have mentioned put you at risk for HIV transmission. In the entire history of the epidemic, and including bites, nicks, bruises and sores on penises, no guy has ever been confirmed to have been infected through getting a blowjob. It's safe to say that you are not going to make history by becoming the first. Nothing else you did was risky either.

This is an HIV-specific website so I can't vouch as far as any other STDs are concerned. It's generally a good idea to have a full STD panel done at least annually if you're sexually active.

Again, this is not an HIV situation. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline as99

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #2 on: October 14, 2007, 12:46:43 PM »
Dear Andy

Thanks for your immediate response, yes i did not have a condom and we dint have intercourse. Well i am sexually active but with only 1 person and like some say SHIT HAPPENS. I am not at all happy abt the experience but ya now done is done and i hope i am safe thats all. Dont wana repeat it again as i have realised it give me a moment of happiness and rest period of guilt and fear and i dont think its worth it. Jutst wana be in the clear this time.

Thanks again
Regards.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #3 on: October 14, 2007, 07:56:26 PM »
OK, understood. As I said, you don't need to be worrying about HIV.

Get on with your life and avoid situations that make you unhappy afterwards is the way to go.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline as99

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #4 on: October 14, 2007, 10:16:06 PM »
Dear Andy

Thanks again, noted your comments and will try my best to avoid such situations in the future as cant take these type of stress...
Regards

Offline as99

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #5 on: October 15, 2007, 01:11:04 PM »
Dear Andy,

I forgot to mention that i am uncircumsized, will that make any difference about that unprotected oral sex...

Offline thunter34

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  • His name is Carl.
Re: Experience In China
« Reply #6 on: October 15, 2007, 01:15:46 PM »
Andy's not on right now, but I can tell you for sure the answer is:

No, that wouldn't make a difference in the scenario you presented.

Don't worry about it.  You didn't have an HIV risk here.

Breathe easy and enjoy your day.
AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline as99

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #7 on: October 26, 2007, 09:03:27 AM »
Dear Andy

Please note that i had put my incident behind my back for 13 days now till i got fever today which has started me to think of HIV again...
Please asses my risk again as i will put in detail,

I had oral sex with 2 different woment on the same night thrice,
1) i am uncircumsized
2) there was alot of vaginal and anal fingering and then also touched my penis
3) i put some alchol on my penis once thought it would spice up the incident
4) dint bother to see if there was any blood or no.

today i end up with fever and sore throat and slight head ache and body pain which inturn escalted my fears... please suggest what can i do and if i test at a 6 weeks mark will it be ok or should i wait for 13 weeks.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #8 on: October 26, 2007, 09:28:21 AM »
Between now and the grave hopefully in the far, far distant future you are going to get sick sometimes, you're going to have fevers and all that good stuff. None of that will mean anything about your HIV status.

The key thing in your original presenting questions is that you used condoms. They provide very effective protection. All of the other details such as fingering and whatever that you have continued to throw into the nervous mix are irrelevant, including alcohol on your johnson.

There is no need for testing. However, if that's what you have to do in order to put your mind at ease, 13 weeks is the benchmark point. In situations where someone has a real risk, which I hasten to say again you did not, a negative result at 6 weeks is very encouraging because all but the smallest number of those who are going to seroconvert will have done so by that point. But when there has been risk, a negative at 13 weeks is the point at which the result is reliable and final.
Andy Velez

Offline as99

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #9 on: October 26, 2007, 09:47:53 AM »
Dear Andy,

The problem is i DID NOT use condoms for my insertive oral sex. i did not have any anal or vaginal inter course with either of the ladies.

Regards
as99

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #10 on: October 26, 2007, 10:28:55 AM »
Oh, sorry about that mixup. I had just been answering someone else and hadn't gone back through this thread before replying. My apologies.

No, your problem is not that you didn't use condoms for insertive oral sex.

Your problem is that you continue to insist that you're going to be the first guy ever to become infected from getting blowjobs. It ain't gonna happen. You have absolutely no HIV science to support your fears of course, but that isn't stopping your mind from carrying on anyway.

Please don't even bother with more details and symptoms. That will not fly here.

Get yourself tested at 13 weeks if you must, collect the inevitable negative result and maybe that will settle this unwarranted concern for you. We've done what we can do for you here. You need to work on getting on with your life. Really.
Andy Velez

Offline as99

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  • Posts: 15
Re: Experience In China
« Reply #11 on: October 26, 2007, 10:40:18 AM »
Dear Andy

Thanks alot... i will try to keep your answer as writing on the stone and i hope all is the truth.....

just got so terrified as i am not one of those kinds hwo get involved frequently with an unknown partner. and definately i wont be doing the same in the future and this is definately gonna be in me like a writing on the stone....

Thanks and prayers for alll of you

shall keep you updated at the 6week test

Regards

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #12 on: October 26, 2007, 12:09:07 PM »
Sounds like a good plan. I certainly expect your 6 week result to be the happy kind. Stay productively busy during the waiting period and you will be amazed at how the time can go by quickly.
Andy Velez

Offline as99

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #13 on: October 28, 2007, 09:25:17 AM »
Hi Andy

I do plan on hanging on for the time frame till i get tested, but you know when the fever pops up at 13 days and head ache the fear of HIV just awakens, as i tend to relate(which you will say is wrong)

i know and hope that you are 100% right but like i said the fear makes it so difficult to pass the time.

Anyways like i said i am going to stick up till 6 eweeks and get a test on 26.11.2007.

Its my gult that is bothering me so much. I have been through all this fear and lived with it for a long time for 2 past episodes and it was a BAD experience and spent so much time and money on that episode which was 3 years ago, And here i am again at the same position. but 2 years ago i became crazy with 2 protected sex experience with a sw. i visited a shrink also as ihd completely lost my mind. The thing is that once is a mistke but 3 times is definately a sin cos no one repeats a mistake if they already know they have made it not 1ce but twice.

Anyways was feeling low so just wrote in. I think i know what you or others will answer but just writing this is making me feel a bot better....

Thanks
Regards

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Experience In China
« Reply #14 on: October 28, 2007, 10:26:26 AM »
as,

You didn't have a risk for hiv infection during your incident.

This forum is not the appropriate place for you to work through your feelings of guilt - you need to do that with your therapist. Think about making an appointment.

This is not an hiv situation.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline as99

  • Member
  • Posts: 15
Re: Experience In China
« Reply #15 on: October 28, 2007, 10:30:47 AM »
Hi ann

I was waitibg for your reply..

Believe me you and andy are so amazing though you do get lil angry types sometimes but definately you have your reasns as people lilke us wont put our thoughts behind our back.

Yours & Andys help is well noted and love you both.

Take Care

Offline as99

  • Member
  • Posts: 15
Re: Experience In China
« Reply #16 on: October 30, 2007, 11:47:05 AM »
Hi again

since last 3 days my fever keeps coming and going and is between 99 and 100 and sometimes it normal after i take my meds.. i had sore throat and today i have this bad cold. 2 days ago , please tell me if this could be ars. I am ok all time long till things keep coming up which seem like symptoms...

Thanks

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Experience In China
« Reply #17 on: October 30, 2007, 11:55:03 AM »
as,

You didn't have a risk for hiv infection during your incident.

You need to discuss your symptoms with a doctor. They have nothing to do with hiv.

This is not an hiv situation.

Please read the posting guidelines found in our Welcome Thread. You are getting close to being given a time out. Please consider yourself warned.

You did not have a risk for hiv infection. See your doctor about your other concerns - we cannot help you with them here.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline as99

  • Member
  • Posts: 15
Re: Experience In China
« Reply #18 on: November 05, 2007, 01:02:38 AM »
Hi ann

I know that you might tiome me out but i have to tell you thanks alot. I was going through the post where i came across your reply to jdukscared where you have explained to him so well giving your own example with your partner. This has put my mind to so much of ease.

Thanks alot.

Offline as99

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  • Posts: 15
Re: Experience In China
« Reply #19 on: November 07, 2007, 05:58:05 AM »
Dear Andy/Ann

I just had one question,
if one has had any thing that is similiar to symptoms of hiv ars at 13 days after episode and last for 3-4 days and if the person tests at 25 days for hiv will it show on the test.

Thanks

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #20 on: November 07, 2007, 09:10:19 AM »
A negative result so early on would not be reliable.

Testing should be done at 13 weeks after a risky incident.

You didn't have a risk so all of the above is irrelevant in relation to your incident.
Andy Velez

Offline as99

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #21 on: November 07, 2007, 09:23:47 AM »
Dear andy

Noted

But would it show on the test on 25 days if one had experienced symptoms 13 days from the episode and lasted for 3-4 days.

Thanks

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #22 on: November 07, 2007, 09:35:22 AM »
Not necessarily. And remember, neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms will ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status. 

You are trying to backtrack into an answer. The real issue here is that you didn't have a risk to begin with and yet you are insistent to the contrary. For what reason I don't know but that seems to me to really be the issue. When this kind of "lingering" occurs it often has to do with feelings of shame and guilt about the sexual experience.
Andy Velez

Offline as99

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Re: Experience In China
« Reply #23 on: November 26, 2007, 03:42:01 AM »
Dear Andy/ Ann

I got a 6 week test done and the result is 0.06 non reactive.

I really appreciate your help and support and thank you for the same. You'll really help us get through this tough waiting period. I shall get tested at week 12 tobe upto the cdc mark

Thanks Alot.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Experience In China
« Reply #24 on: November 26, 2007, 10:45:48 AM »
as,

As you did not have a risk for hiv infection, you are not in a window period and your test result is conclusive. You ARE hiv negative and you do not need further testing.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline as99

  • Member
  • Posts: 15
Re: Experience In China
« Reply #25 on: November 27, 2007, 08:08:03 AM »
Dear Ann

Noted your comments and frankly this 6 week test has put my mind 99.99% at rest and ya you and andy also have a big hand in doing soooo (thanks for that). I end my testing here..

You know what i think one should not have the food they cant digest. Same goes for sex if one cant handle the pressure they shouldnt wander. The thing is that i have a friend and was speaking to him and he told me that he has been having a blow job UNPROTECTED for like 10 years now with sw but wont have sex with them. And he is comfortable with that. Again i have a friend who has sex like i cant even count with sw some time he has taken two, also manier times he is soooo drunk i am sure he doesnt even know what he would be doing. but he tests annually.
Now i said the above story so that other readers can understand what their comfort level is. Fo me sex with any unknown person means fear and to some people blow job is ok and to some protected sex is ok. So people decide what your comfort level is and do accordingly cos thats what i am going to TRY my best but like andy says we are all dawgs who some times wander around.

REGARDS AND REALLY HEARTFUL THANKS TO ANDY AND ANN.

 


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