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Author Topic: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"  (Read 22627 times)

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Offline Suntropic98

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HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« on: October 09, 2007, 11:33:53 AM »
Well after my month long hyateus I am finally back!

So after my tragic episode with the woman many of you remember so vividly I have fully bounced back and have been on the rebound like no other. I'm on top of my A game now but the past month and couple of weeks have been a learning exp to say the least. I've hurt my shoulder in a freak accident, fell down inside the shower and landed on my shoulder. I think I've either torn my cuff , bruised the interior muscle or have a slight sprain. Either way it's killing me and I'm going to an orthopedic to check it out.

As far as the female situations go it has been a whirlwind of a time. I'm like the energizer bunny, I just don't stop. After telling the first chick about me being POZ and her freaking out I figured I have nothing to lose and decided to just keep hitting them all up till I find one dumb enough (or sweet enough) to look past my status. So far there has been a Tiffany, a Melissa, a Mandi, a Marissa, a Kristen and a Jennifer. Not to mention I broke down and had sex with my soon to be ex-wife again. Something came over me and I couldn't stop that one. I met someone online on a poz site who turned out to be a blowjob ninja, straight brought the ancient talent down on me like a renaissance. Women like her only come around every couple thousand years, kind of like Mary Magdalen. Problem with that one was I could barely understand a word she said. She was from Russia and had been living here for just over 2 years. Horrible english but she does have a medical degree from St. Petersburg so she either gave up mad head for it or she's actually smart. She is also about 10 years older than me which was hot but really I think it's just a one time thing. Her body looks really good but I'm having a hard time dealing with the busted english. We'll see what happens. I'm just a little skeptical about the whole mail order bride look she has.

As far as my night of chaotic debauchery goes, I had a really hard time figuring out how to prevent that B.S.  from happening again....then it hit me. I went to a gay bar where chicks would not be hounding me. I had the time of my life, ironically. I felt at home, HIV signs were everywhere. I met the owner of the mega club, he actually gave me a tour and my drinks were free. Problem is I was probably the only straight guy there. I ended up with 14 business cards the next day from guys giving me their cards. I had no idea in gay bars people actually have cards for hook ups. That was wierd. Cool thing about that was I found 3 guys who took me shopping and picked my clothes out, and they are pretty f*ing good at it. I actually had a lot of fun that night but I won't be going back. I'm just not gay and I had too many guys hitting on me. One guy's card said "If you're thinking what I'm thinking....call me" and then it had his name ::) Wow. Thats all I have to say about that.

On to the women in my life now.....

I don't know what it is but all 6 of them have been taking a really wierd twist to this HIV thing. A couple of them freaked out seriously, like I was some kind of alien. After a few days they both started calling me back worried about me and wanted to know how I'm doing. 2 of them actually got mad at me that I didn't have sex with them and one said it still does not change things between us only that some things we can do and some things we can't. We talked but it has been 3 days since I last heard from her. Her boyfriend came back in town from up north after being gone all off season, he's a professional hockey player. I doubt I'll be hearing from her as much as I did due to him being around now but still she was mad I never hit it. She pulled the whole "Do you have any idea how many guys would love to come over and have sex with me?" card. Thats when I decided to stun her and just came out with "I have HIV". The other two were shocked and could not believe I had HIV, one of them thought I was actually lying about it and told me if I didn't want to talk to her anymore to just tell her and not insult her intelligence. I was just like "No, seriously, I had f*ing AIDS in Feb 2006. I got it from my ex-wife" and she still did not believe me until a couple of days later when i showed her a copy of my latest lab results. Now she is cooking me dinner 3 nights a week, like chicken noodle soup thats homemade with veggies. The other chick was all upset and mad that I was not upfront from the moment we met but has since has some sort of wierd motherly kick. She tells me we're still ment to have met each other and she wants to stay around me. She's done my laundry twice already and she asks a ton of questions about the virus and meds and how my life has been since. She actually may be a keeper but there has been no intimacy aside from just making out. The other, I think is getting off by knowing my status. Thats really f*ing wierd. I get this feeling like she thinks I'm like a dangerous animal thats hers and she has under control. Either that or she just does not care about HIV and likes to just "show me off" which is fine by me but still......i don't know if there's something there for the future. All in all I like the attention and it's helping me get over my ex. Several have already told me I'm high maintenance but I've really been dragged through some mud the last 2 years. I really got nailed to the cross by my ex and the lawyers still have not worked everything out. I think these women are helping me through a rough time, though I'm not getting any from them aside from the russian chick and my ex. I'm terrified of the legal reprecussion of hitting it while being POZ. I just don't know how to deal with a woman being mad at me for not having sex with her. That really bothers me. Like I'm not doing my manly duty. Keeping it tight and hitting it right use to be my motto. Now I can't do either without major risks involved. I feel like a part of me is gone forever.

lost in my world.....


-Sunny

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #1 on: October 09, 2007, 11:45:27 AM »
Your stories continue to inspire and impress.

I hope you find your happiness.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #2 on: October 09, 2007, 11:50:36 AM »
Your stories continue to inspire and impress.

I hope you find your happiness.



I don't know bro. There really is no reason to impress but I do strive to be an inspiration to all men with HIV. Bottom line is very rarely do men like me come around and it's really not over until it's over. HIV or not, shits not going to phaze me.

Offline Dachshund

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #3 on: October 09, 2007, 11:51:03 AM »
  


lost in my world.....

Nuff said

Offline woodshere

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #4 on: October 09, 2007, 11:52:11 AM »
Your stories continue to inspire and impress.

As well as leave some readers speechless, like me at this very moment.

....very rarely do men like me come around ......


huh?????
"Let us give pubicity to HV/AIDS and not hide it..." "One of the things destroying people with AIDS is the stigma we attach to it."   Nelson Mandela

Offline structuredjen

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #5 on: October 09, 2007, 12:01:01 PM »
I figured I have nothing to lose and decided to just keep hitting them all up till I find one dumb enough (or sweet enough) to look past my status.

Sun - you know I love ya.. but I take a bit of offense to the above statement as the negative partner in a serodiscordant relationship.  I'd like to think I'm not dumb or sweet...  in fact, I'd like to think it's my intelligence that gives me the strength to be in a relationship with someone who is poz.

If you looked at it like that, you might just find a woman with beauty AND brains. ;)


Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #6 on: October 09, 2007, 12:51:40 PM »
Sun - you know I love ya.. but I take a bit of offense to the above statement as the negative partner in a serodiscordant relationship.  I'd like to think I'm not dumb or sweet...  in fact, I'd like to think it's my intelligence that gives me the strength to be in a relationship with someone who is poz.

If you looked at it like that, you might just find a woman with beauty AND brains. ;)


Hey Jen, I love ya too babe. I did not mean for it to come across like that. I made that statement coming from the angle of 90% of the women out there I've met are either ignorant or simply don't care to know about the virus. One chick I mentioned in the post even asked " HIV? That stuff is still around?" and I just shook my head. I don't know if I end up with all the bimbos or what but none of them except one really cared to be well informed about it. Honestly, I wish I could find someone like you. Fact is you're an extremely rare thing....like me. The ignorant ones hear the word HIV and run for the hills and the sweet ones ( I am finding out) may stick around and pamper your ass but won't break you off any. I've pretty much accepted the fact that I won't find a chick like you....and if I do find one I don't know what I would do. I would be floored. So, again, I'm sorry if it sounded degrading or offensive. I did not mean for it to sound like that.  ;) PM me if you want to talk more about it. Besides, I think I owe you a PM anyways.  ;D I've been MIA for just over a month.



Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #7 on: October 09, 2007, 12:58:40 PM »
blowjob ninja.... where's milker?
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #8 on: October 09, 2007, 01:02:17 PM »
blowjob ninja.... where's milker?

You like that one, don't ya? Remember where you got it from.  8)

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #9 on: October 09, 2007, 01:02:42 PM »
 


lost in my world.....



Nuff said

But we could take him shopping... that could be amusing.
« Last Edit: October 09, 2007, 01:05:49 PM by philly267 »
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Moffie65

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #10 on: October 09, 2007, 01:41:58 PM »
For the readers of this thread; if you are not appalled, you aren't paying attention!

Love,
The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals,
and 362 to heterosexuals.
This doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals,
It's just that they need more supervision.
Lynn Lavne

Offline manchesteruk

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #11 on: October 09, 2007, 01:45:34 PM »
Your attitude towards women never fails to amaze me.  You have to be a wind up, I didn't think people like this actually existed!
Diagnosed 11/05

"Life is too important to be taken seriously" Oscar Wilde

Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #12 on: October 09, 2007, 02:06:48 PM »
But we could take him shopping... that could be amusing.



We'd have a blast. I could learn so much about clothes from you guys.

Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #13 on: October 09, 2007, 02:09:14 PM »
I didn't think people like this actually existed!


People said the same thing about Jesus, Thomas Jefferson, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Dan Brown, Bill Clinton and the list could go on.......I'm flattered.

Offline Lwood

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #14 on: October 09, 2007, 02:11:36 PM »
So the obvious conclusion Im getting is that I need to have cards with " BlowJob Ninja " printed up ...

youd better Copyright that one..

Not everyone may necessarily agree with what Sun says in alot of his posts , you have to admit that its a style of writing that really breaks the monotony around here. Ill even go so far as suggest that he'd make a good addition to AIDSmeds lineup of  Bloggers.. Hes coming from a place that isnt very well represented but is unfortunately destined to grow (Alpha Male, Straight, Single, Young, Pretty Attractive and socially aloof,  sort of like the Male version of Reagan Hoffman )  

The 'Florence Nightengale ' reaction from the women is a new one on me,  and as for the Bad reactions, Dingoboi used to refer to Disclosure it as " An Asshole Detector"  so I suppose it works the same in the straight scene as well.
 8) L


P.S. the post you made months ago about guys taking Altripa before going out clubbing in case they want to 'Hit it Raw ' still makes me chuckle
"Fortunately, I Keep My T Cells Numbered For Just Such An Emergency"
  -Either Foghorn Leghorn or Johnny Cash

Offline manchesteruk

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #15 on: October 09, 2007, 02:20:18 PM »

People said the same thing about Jesus, Thomas Jefferson, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Dan Brown, Bill Clinton and the list could go on.......I'm flattered.

hahaha, definitely a windup!
Diagnosed 11/05

"Life is too important to be taken seriously" Oscar Wilde

Offline Dachshund

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #16 on: October 09, 2007, 02:25:25 PM »
 so I suppose it works the same in the straight scene as well.


Nothing takes the wind out of the sails of a player like some good ol' fashioned HIV tainted blood. The rest is all talk and there are plenty of vlogs to prove it. Play on player.

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #17 on: October 09, 2007, 02:45:14 PM »
I see a lot of insecurity and "aiming to please" here from you, Sun.  Sad how nothing has changed.  Yes, Moffie I AM appalled, shaking my head in disgust.

Wake the hell up, will you?!?!?

~Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline ademas

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #18 on: October 09, 2007, 02:55:54 PM »
I read Sun's threads, but I have a difficult time taking them very seriously.

The original post is usually so way over the top that it's more a caricature of a person that really doesn't exist to this extreme.  Some of his follow up posts to the comments others make are more thoughtful, which just reinforces my thoughts that he's posting for reaction.

It all seems more like a modus operandi of posting than anything else, and 90% chain-yanking.

Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #19 on: October 09, 2007, 02:58:00 PM »
I see a lot of insecurity and "aiming to please" here from you, Sun.  Sad how nothing has changed.  Yes, Moffie I AM appalled, shaking my head in disgust.

Wake the hell up, will you?!?!?

~Cindy

I'm not trying to offend you, cindy, but after reading some of your posts about your mental and financial issues in the women only forum I came to the conclusion long ago you're a total nut job.

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #20 on: October 09, 2007, 03:03:09 PM »
Thanks, Sun, I got a good laugh out of that last post from you.  My friends here know me better. 

Us "nuts" should hang out sometime.   :-*
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline thunter34

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #21 on: October 09, 2007, 03:03:40 PM »
I've kept silent on this thread so far, but that last post just pushed it.  Cindy's shared trials have come off a lot more legitimate and heartfelt to me than your hand-wringing over how HIV has cramped your style and ability to keep "hitting it right" with all your "chicks".  Reported you there, sun.
AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #22 on: October 09, 2007, 03:08:30 PM »
I read Sun's threads, but I have a difficult time taking them very seriously.

The original post is usually so way over the top that it's more a caricature of a person that really doesn't exist to this extreme.  Some of his follow up posts to the comments others make are more thoughtful, which just reinforces my thoughts that he's posting for reaction.

It all seems more like a modus operandi of posting than anything else, and 90% chain-yanking.

Point taken, ademas. Take my posts for face value, thats what I tell my readers. Believe it or not there are many who were concerned about me during my break from the board. If I was not who I am, or as you say portray myself to be, then I would still be negative and I would not even be on this board. Truth.

Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #23 on: October 09, 2007, 03:13:08 PM »
Thanks, Sun, I got a good laugh out of that last post from you.  My friends here know me better. 

Us "nuts" should hang out sometime.   :-*


I'm just telling it like it is. Don't try to call me out when you have deep rooted issues yourself.

Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #24 on: October 09, 2007, 03:15:14 PM »
Nothing takes the wind out of the sails of a player like some good ol' fashioned HIV tainted blood.


Yea man, it kind of grabs you by the balls. Even you can relate to that one.

Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #25 on: October 09, 2007, 03:17:44 PM »
I've kept silent on this thread so far, but that last post just pushed it.  Cindy's shared trials have come off a lot more legitimate and heartfelt to me than your hand-wringing over how HIV has cramped your style and ability to keep "hitting it right" with all your "chicks".  Reported you there, sun.


Reported me? What is this? Day Care? Tell me what exactly I've done wrong. And just to reiterate for a moment, if I recall correctly I said I'm not hitting much anything.

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #26 on: October 09, 2007, 03:19:14 PM »
if I recall correctly I said I'm not hitting much anything.

Oh dear.  I'm going to get some lunch or something. 
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline woodshere

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #27 on: October 09, 2007, 03:19:31 PM »

I'm just telling it like it is. Don't try to call me out when you have deep rooted issues yourself.

I don't think anyone is trying to call you out for issues you have.  Speaking for just me, I find the way you refer to women and speak of women to be very chauvinistic and offensive.


Reported me? What is this?


Maybe calling someone a nut job.

"Let us give pubicity to HV/AIDS and not hide it..." "One of the things destroying people with AIDS is the stigma we attach to it."   Nelson Mandela

Offline Peter Staley

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #28 on: October 09, 2007, 03:21:51 PM »
I'm not trying to offend you, cindy, but after reading some of your posts about your mental and financial issues in the women only forum I came to the conclusion long ago you're a total nut job.

Sun -- Peter Staley here, the founder of this site.  The insult you posted above crosses over the line of what we consider acceptable discourse here.  Consider yourself warned.

Cindy -- for the sake of nipping this flamewar in the bud, please resist posting to this thread any further.

Sun -- if you're not familiar with our warning and Time-Out system here, please read the sticky thread near the top of this forum.  The only response to this warning you should even consider posting publicly is an apology.  If you have a problem with my warning, feel free to send me a private message about it.  If you attempt to defend your words above, in any way, you'll be given an immediate 7 day time-out.

Peter Staley

Offline 404error

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #29 on: October 09, 2007, 03:48:47 PM »
I have to say I find this guys threads amongst the most entertaining on this site.  Not because I agree with what he says, or even believe that all of it is 100% truth. What I really like are the reactions I read from others.  This guy really seems to set some people off.  Conflict is interesting, not to live through but certainly to read through online.
A social critic who promotes equality...

Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #30 on: October 09, 2007, 03:51:30 PM »
Peter-

I am sorry for any line crossed.  


On another note, you're just the guy I need to talk to. How can I go about becoming an Aidsmeds blogger?

Offline Peter Staley

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #31 on: October 09, 2007, 03:58:41 PM »
Send an email to editors-at-aidsmeds.com requesting to join our blogging team.  Just an FYI, there are quite a few folks at Smart+Strong who get involved with a decision to add a new blogger, and sometimes we decide not to add a blogger simply because we feel we have a large enough blogging team as is.  But your request will be considered if sent via email.

Peter

Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #32 on: October 09, 2007, 04:15:45 PM »
Send an email to editors-at-aidsmeds.com requesting to join our blogging team.  Just an FYI, there are quite a few folks at Smart+Strong who get involved with a decision to add a new blogger, and sometimes we decide not to add a blogger simply because we feel we have a large enough blogging team as is.  But your request will be considered if sent via email.

Peter

So basically the way it works is that people take a vote on you and then based on that decision it is determined whether or not you may become a blogger. Am I right? I'm asking because I have looked at the bloggers and have yet to find a blogger who represents my segment of the HIV community as one person other than myself has pointed out in this thread. I think given my persona I would make a great blogger. I will apply via email. And I would like to make clear that I am in no way dicing people up into categories. We all have at least one thing in common but I think in a lot of cases that is where it ends and I think there are many who would agree. Thank you for your help.  8)

Offline Peter Staley

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #33 on: October 09, 2007, 04:34:06 PM »
Frankly, how we pick our bloggers is a bit of a mystery, and we'd like to keep it that way.

Offline Dachshund

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #34 on: October 09, 2007, 04:58:49 PM »

Yea man, it kind of grabs you by the balls. Even you can relate to that one.

Not really, I've been hittin' it since the day I became infected. ;D
« Last Edit: October 09, 2007, 05:01:46 PM by Dachshund »

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #35 on: October 09, 2007, 05:09:54 PM »
Geez. I don't even know how to respond to be honest. I agree you have issues with women or at least to me it seems. Or better yet, I have to wonder about the caliber of women or should I say girls you deal with. I am amazed that someone even took the chance to marry you because you have a major ego that needs to be knocked down a peg or two.

Your life seems to center around sex and booze. Women to you seem to be nothing other than notches on your bedpost or what they can do for you. What do you have to offer them Sun other than a hard dick? And dick comes a dime a dozen whether it be human or plastic. I see you as a womanizer and the women that deal with you seem to be looking for a nut, not much else.

I hope that Peter and the people at Strong+ Smart show some common sense and not add you to their blogging team. To me that would be like sliding down a razor into a pool of gasoline. Your comments would do nothing more than ignite a flame war to say the least which you have shown just by trying to insult Cindy. And  I am not even going to mention the faux pau made by them before.... :-X So Peter if you never listen to me in your LIFE please listen to me now, PLEASE DO NOT PUT SUN ON THE BLOGGING TEAM. ANd yes Moffie, I agree with you, I am appalled. You're cute Sun but you're not that cute.......
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
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Offline woodshere

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #36 on: October 09, 2007, 05:15:04 PM »
Geez. I don't even know how to respond to be honest. I agree you have issues with women or at least to me it seems. Or better yet, I have to wonder about the caliber of women or should I say girls you deal with. I am amazed that someone even took the chance to marry you because you have a major ego that needs to be knocked down a peg or two.

Your life seems to center around sex and booze. Women to you seem to be nothing other than notches on your bedpost or what they can do for you. What do you have to offer them Sun other than a hard dick? And dick comes a dime a dozen whether it be human or plastic. I see you as a womanizer and the women that deal with you seem to be looking for a nut, not much else.

I hope that Peter and the people at Strong+ Smart show some common sense and not add you to their blogging team. To me that would be like sliding down a razor into a pool of gasoline. Your comments would do nothing more than ignite a flame war to say the least which you have shown just by trying to insult Cindy. And  I am not even going to mention the faux pau made by them before.... :-X So Peter if you never listen to me in your LIFE please listen to me now, PLEASE DO NOT PUT SUN ON THE BLOGGING TEAM. ANd yes Moffie, I agree with you, I am appalled. You're cute Sun but you're not that cute.......

ALL HAIL THE QUEEN!!!!
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Offline englishgirl

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #37 on: October 09, 2007, 05:20:44 PM »
suntropic, to me you appear from your posts to be struggling with your status, even if you dont think you are.

im glad that you feel that you are able to disclose to potential partners at the moment, but i dont think that i am alone in feeling that the way you are going about it is also symptomatic of your needing help dealing with your status and the emotional challenges which it presents to you.

like many others i wonder how much you are attempting to provoke strong reactions from people, and i suggest that it might be appropriate for you to seek some counselling regarding your status (and possibly regarding your attitude to women and relationships).

up - i'm gonna have to disagree with you here, i dont think this sort of conflict is interesting, i think it's sad. i have no probs with intellectual conflict or ideological discussions, but i do have probs with this. it makes me sad when i think that people are being upset or wound up. especially when it is possibly intentional.

peter - i echo queen. i would have serious concerns with putting someone on the blogging team who i believe still has so many issues with their status. additionally i would hope that if the team were to add a heterosexual male blogger (i assume this is the unrepresented 'segment' to which suntropic refers to) it was one who had more complimentary views of women.

sun - if you are considering blogging why not instead consider some community work? educating others in your area about hiv? fighting stigma and highlighting safe sex? who knows, you might even meet a nice woman that way...
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Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #38 on: October 09, 2007, 05:24:13 PM »
Well Woodsy, you know I must keep it real. I am anxiously awaiting Sun's reply because he is not dealing with a bimbo here. I would like to know where he meets these women at? Ah, yes the local watering hole or prolly a rave party where everyone is prolly jacked up on X or something. I think if Sun had a real woman in front of him he wouldn't know how to act, him or his pecker...... ::)
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

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Offline Andy Velez

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #39 on: October 09, 2007, 05:35:20 PM »
Hey All,

I just want to put in a word of caution here.

I'm reminded of a couple of unhappy instances in recent threads in which someone's begun a thread which displayed not a lot of self-awareness along with a fair amount of self-involvement. The result was finding themselves to be the object of quickly mobilized and considerable negative feedback.

So while there's room for give and take in the Forums, I am concerned about how easy it would be to have another gangup here, with Sun the object in this case.

Please avoid any name calling and/or labeling and keep your comments strictly from the "I" perspective.

Thanks for your cooperation.

Andy Velez

Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #40 on: October 09, 2007, 05:59:56 PM »
Geez. I don't even know how to respond to be honest. I agree you have issues with women or at least to me it seems. Or better yet, I have to wonder about the caliber of women or should I say girls you deal with. I am amazed that someone even took the chance to marry you because you have a major ego that needs to be knocked down a peg or two.

Your life seems to center around sex and booze. Women to you seem to be nothing other than notches on your bedpost or what they can do for you. What do you have to offer them Sun other than a hard dick? And dick comes a dime a dozen whether it be human or plastic. I see you as a womanizer and the women that deal with you seem to be looking for a nut, not much else.

I hope that Peter and the people at Strong+ Smart show some common sense and not add you to their blogging team. To me that would be like sliding down a razor into a pool of gasoline. Your comments would do nothing more than ignite a flame war to say the least which you have shown just by trying to insult Cindy. And  I am not even going to mention the faux pau made by them before.... :-X So Peter if you never listen to me in your LIFE please listen to me now, PLEASE DO NOT PUT SUN ON THE BLOGGING TEAM. ANd yes Moffie, I agree with you, I am appalled. You're cute Sun but you're not that cute.......

I just want to quote this passage before it gets deleted or edited. I get grilled for calling someone a nut job who is an established member of this site and respected by many but then absolutly nothing is done about this or the guy who is egging her on. Amazing!

Akasha, I had to work late tonight and I am about to leave my office. I will respond to you later in a few hours. All of your questions will be answered.

Offline Suntropic98

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #41 on: October 09, 2007, 06:01:37 PM »
Well Woodsy, you know I must keep it real. I am anxiously awaiting Sun's reply because he is not dealing with a bimbo here. I would like to know where he meets these women at? Ah, yes the local watering hole or prolly a rave party where everyone is prolly jacked up on X or something. I think if Sun had a real woman in front of him he wouldn't know how to act, him or his pecker...... ::)


the 2nd quote......just for POI (proof of incidence)

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #42 on: October 09, 2007, 06:10:34 PM »
I understand where you are coming from Andy. Really I do. But I would just like you and the others including Sun to understand where I am coming from if I may.

I have read Sun's posts in the past. His posts about females really gets to me. One, being that I am a female but it makes me wonder where he gets his women from or even his thinking on women. He gives me the impression that women are here merely for his sexual pleasure and nothing more. And that the women he deals with are complete idiots for lack of a better word. I actually get a visual of him asking one of his females what is 1+1 and she is literally scratching her head and comes up with the answer 1. And him in response saying, It's ok sweetie while steadily walking her to the bedroom. But then from reading his previous posts, he always seems to be the life of the party and this prolly where the females come from.

Then I have to ask myself what if he came across an intelligent, strong, and sexual female. How would he respond? A female in order to get her in the bed he would have to stimulate her mentally which means none of the lame pick up lines but an actual intelligent conversation. How would he respond?

I may be ghetto fabulous in my ways but I am also educated. I have street knowledge as well as some book knowledge. The type of man that Sun shows himself to be on these forums, I would shut down in an instant. In other words he would bore me because he would not hold my interest.

I guess more than anything I am just amazed at what some settle for. If you wish to give me T. O. because of this post, I understand but I just felt I needed to say this so you could see where I was coming from...

Ah Sun, I see you have quoted my posts, how gracious of you. I hope this post let's you know where I am coming from.. If you wish to comment to me that is fine, it can be here or in a PM. I really am trying to figure out  where you are coming from. If my posts have offended you which it seems it has, I apologize that your ego was bruised so easily.
« Last Edit: October 09, 2007, 06:17:01 PM by Queen Akasha »
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline Ann

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #43 on: October 09, 2007, 06:19:06 PM »
I just want to quote this passage before it gets deleted or edited. I get grilled for calling someone a nut job who is an established member of this site and respected by many but then absolutly nothing is done about this or the guy who is egging her on. Amazing!


For a start, did you not bother to read Andy's warning? Maybe you should before you complain about "absolutely nothing" being done.

And anyway, Akasha didn't call you names, unlike your name-calling directed at Moonlight.

Quite frankly, I'm also appalled at your attitude towards women. "Chicks" - you don't seem to have clue one how offensive that term can be to women. And that's only the tip of the iceberg.

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Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline anniebc

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #44 on: October 09, 2007, 06:33:23 PM »
I  agree with everything Ann had to say on this one..but that's all I'm saying in regards to this thread....I have no further interest in what Suntropic has to say in this or any other thread.

Jan

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Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #45 on: October 09, 2007, 06:46:54 PM »
You don't have to be a woman to appreciate why Sun's comments are so offensive. Last time I checked women were human beings, not mere objects to be conquered for somebody else's sexual and ego gratification.

Any decent, reasonable human being would feel the way the Queen, Ann and others do upon reading the adolescent tales related here and in other threads by the OP. Daddy Tim, Youth Pastor Tim and Woodsy, all decent people, have formed that view.

MtD

Offline Bucko

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #46 on: October 09, 2007, 08:41:20 PM »
Troppie-

You and I have been through all this several threads ago.

You claim to not be a player, and get vaguely offended at the word, but your vocabulary says otherwise. If you wish to be taken seriously as a member here, an elemental understanding of life and how humanity operates off Miami Beach's various bridges and causeways seems to be in order.

Is it really acceptable to refer to females as "chicks", "blowjob ninjas" and the ever-popular "nutjob" (to mine only the most egregious terms from this thread) outside of a VIP room or a strip joint anywhere? Would you want someone referring to your female relatives in such a fashion?

I am perhaps the least puritanical and most loudly sex-positive member around here. I have no axe to grind regarding sexual adventure and conquest except as an enthusiastic participant. I am no prude but I have found your posts singularly insensitive to the women who read what you write.

Having spoken with more than one woman member here who've spoken to you via PM, I've been told that the demeanor you project in the open forum is tempered in private. Perhaps you'll find a more sympathetic public if you choose to express yourself in your PM voice more generally.

And, of course, I'd love to take you shopping. It could be an AIDSy take on Queer Eye...   
Blessed with brains, talent and gorgeous tits.

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Offline Andy Velez

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #47 on: October 09, 2007, 09:53:23 PM »
Sun, it's perfectly understandable if you dislike some of the responses you've gotten since I posted earlier this evening, But in giving them a careful reading I see only honest reactions to what you've written without anyone resorting to namecalling or other like commentary.

I don't know whether you can dig this or not, but you simply can't use the kind of provocative terminology you do and expect members to react simply with "please pass the cucumber sandwiches, Lady Bracknell." You've said some things and used words which stir very real reactions. Rather than responding quickly and being defensive  I would urge you to give some considered thought to how people feel about some of the things you've said. I know what I'm asking isn't easy to do but I'm asking it anyway.

You can if you wish PM me if you think that would be helpful. That's an offer and not a request.

Meanwhile we will continue to watch this thread. Carefully.
Andy Velez

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #48 on: October 09, 2007, 09:57:37 PM »

We'd have a blast. I could learn so much about clothes from you guys.

Oh, I'm *VERY* VIP at the Bal Harbour Shops.
"Iíve slept with enough men to know that Iím not gay"

Offline Lwood

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Re: HIV and Dating: Part III "I'm back and I have a lot to tell"
« Reply #49 on: October 10, 2007, 11:56:02 AM »


But seriously, Lets just pop the batteries out of the old Label Maker for a few minutes here.
 Ive seen gay men refered to as Fags, Bitches, Sissies, Queers, Twinks, all manner of Pig and then theres my personal favorite " Power Bottom " here in the forums on a regular basis, and not always in the fond, cutsie pie tea party fashion either. 
let me put this one forth : If its offensive for a straight man to call a woman a 'Chick '  or even a Blowjob Ninja  isnt it equally offensive for someont to refer to a gay man as a Sissy, Queer, or Piss Pig ?  I know I dont particularly care to be refered to that way, even by other gay men ( not that Im a piss pig mind you, thats just a metaphor )   Granted, in a public Support Forum, a lot of terms  that would normally be thrown around in a barroom or back porch arent apropriate, but if we all need to keep our conversations on this Forum all squeaky clean and Politically Correct I think it should apply across the board .
OK, rant over please replace the batteries in the label maker, I need a dozen 'Blowjob Ninjaô ' stickers by the weekend...

"Fortunately, I Keep My T Cells Numbered For Just Such An Emergency"
  -Either Foghorn Leghorn or Johnny Cash

 


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