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Author Topic: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men  (Read 31663 times)

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Offline emeraldize

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Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« on: September 14, 2007, 11:24:44 AM »
It's time to rethread our needle. Loads of loading time. The title echoes issues in recent posts that many of us are tackling.

ML: The job with your name on it is out there and I'm convinced you're going to find it. Your idea to enlist the realty co-owner in your search is excellent. That's a selling technique I learned in a class. In debrief mode, it is always okay to ask why you weren't selected in case there's anything to be learned. I think there's something extra good on the horizon for you.

GQ: I'm reading you closely as I'm 4 years in and realize there are no guarantees as to how long the med-free run lasts. I'm impressed with how you're moving through this first phase. I'm sure others are, too.

BT: Have a good date! No, take that back. Have a great date!

SS: You loggin' in any time soon?

CJC: Thanks for the well wishing. I'll give a brief State of the Date report on Sunday or Monday.

Drag, LG, Camille, Shotis and others whose names are on Part V and I can't flip over there mid-post....

Have a good weekend wherever you are whether that's "Stone" Harbor, the "Boo"tique, "Never" Nether Lands, or a couch or theatre near you.

Em

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #1 on: September 14, 2007, 12:18:55 PM »
Hi GFs~

Thanks for continuing to give me support.  I believe that there is SOMETHING out there for me in the job department, there HAS to be.  Why else would the wait be so long?  I was unemployed in '98 for 4 months, and again in '04 for, gosh 6 months, now that I think of it!  Its usually easier for me to get a job, though.  Dammit.

I am going to the HIV Support Group here in town tonight.  The second Friday of the month is women only, so its a good starting point.  I met the facilitator briefly yesterday at the Health Dept, too.  She's nice, so I feel more comfortable. 

I go back to the Health Dept. today to finish paperwork.  For what?  So I can have a file created on me in case I ever need help?  I guess that's how it goes.  I'm not that bad off, at all, I certainly don't need their services at this point, esp since they can't even help with housing, but its nice to know I have someone to turn to in case trouble arises.  I don't even want to go back there today.  I feel so out of place in there, its irritating to me.

Drag~  You wrote about joining forces with Stone.  Well, weeks ago I mentioned to him that he could rent my basement if it came to it.  We had only just met each other then, but I like to help where I can.  He is very pissed at the apt complex where he lives.  There is a chick upstairs who is most likely a prostitute, and the cops are at her door all of the time.  Last Sunday Stone and I walked out, and there she was with two other guys, smoking weed in public down the sidewalk.  What if Stone had had his son with him and was taking him to dinner?  These people don't respect the area, they break beer bottles at the playground, they just loiter and hang around with nothing to do.  I just wish they would drink and get high behind closed doors and respect their neighbors some.  This place is actually a nice apartment complex, but these bad apples are making it look like crap.  Stone, and even his mother have called management.  Belive me, Stone would like nothing better than to go get in their faces, a huge muscular 43yo man, talking down to a young person who doesn't give a shit about themselves or life.  He's afraid of retaliation.  I told him when the day comes for him to move out.....oh yeah, you get the idea.  I'm glad colder weather is coming, it will keep these people inside where we don't have to see them.  I find myself wanting to call the cops on them and saying, "Get a job already" but hell, I can't even get one.

So, long story short, cause I was venting there, I would like Stone to move outta his hood and share my house, its just that I am 20 miles up the road, and traffic is a bitch.  Its too early for he and I to make that commitment to each other, as I don't even have the title of GF yet, but I'll know better over the next few months.  Stone is mostly concerned about traffic for when taking his son to school one morning a week.  To go 30 miles, it would take about and hour and a half.  Its awful.  We were talking about this the other day, and I gently explained that his son would benefit from living in a better neighborhood.  Not only because Stone would be more at ease, but rent would be cut in half for each of us, and wouldn't it be worth the "sacrifice" with the traffic one day a week?

Well, that's all cart before the horse, I am daydreaming.  Yesterday Stone said he and his son were going to the mountains to visit his mom and sis and did I want to come along?  I am planning on it, but I am nervous.

Right now I am mostly nervous about the support group tonight because I am pissed at what has transpired this week, with no job and no financial support with housing.  I hope there is at least one woman in there who is like me, HIV aside.  I went through this shit years ago, going to a support group and not being able to identify with anyone's lifestyles.  Sigh........

Oh, and Betty, good job on not smoking!  Keep up the good work!

Queen, check in and let us know how last night went.  I am worried about that tummy of yours....

~Cindy

« Last Edit: September 15, 2007, 12:18:19 AM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #2 on: September 14, 2007, 02:09:42 PM »
As I reported in my thread, last night was totally crappy. My sugar dropped to 71 so I ate some roarin strawberry jello. I know that is at least safe to eat with Atripla. Then on top of that, I had a hard time going to sleep and once I did go to sleep, I had 2 nightmares. Which means I really didn't get to sleep til like after 5 am. So today I feel like a total zombie. I will be getting a nap in sometime today. But I will hope for a better night tonight.

As for Boo, when I talk to him next I will give him your suggestions. He said he likes milkshakes but hates ensure. He also said he doesn't exercise much. I told him to start or chase his kitties around... ;D

I am really liking the M theme with this thread. Good Job, Em. Cindy, I'm hoping you are feeling a bit better today. Let me know how the group goes tonight. I hope it works for you. Sorry about the Health Dept and Welfare but they are that way here too. Remember I went to them for help with moving and was told they only help those that are homeless, in a shelter or in eviction stage. They want you to be at rock bottom before they will even lift a finger. Sad, isn't it? As far as Stone goes, to me, it seems like you are getting closer to being gf, meeting the family is definitely a good sign. Don't give up and maybe one day he will take you up on the offer to move in but it is still a bit early for that. Hang in there, girl.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #3 on: September 14, 2007, 02:13:50 PM »
Love you, Queen. I hope you feel a little better after some rest.  I am stressed out, so I am going by Chik-fil-A before I go to the Health Dept.   ;D  I'll post tonight.....
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #4 on: September 14, 2007, 05:53:55 PM »
I don't know what is going on with me today. I took my son to get his first check (he was so proud) and run his errands. I came home posted to you guys then caught about an hour nap. I feel a little better but a bit sluggish. I check my sugar and it is 274, oh hell....But am wondering why it is so high when I have eaten very little. Remember last night it was only 71. I'm wondering if the Atripla/Ziagen has anything to do with this? Anyhoo, I dragged my ass to the kitchen and decided to cook a roast. I've been craving one for the longest. Other than that, nothing eventful has happened. Tonight, I will watch some wrestling and just chill. I hope you girls are having a better day than me...*sighs*
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #5 on: September 14, 2007, 08:51:52 PM »
Hey girls:
  A gay friend of mine from my church took me to Outback Steak House tonight in celebration of my quitting smoking.  Then we went and cruised around Barnes & Nobles for awhile, looking at books, movies etc.  So it was a good night.  He gave me a disco music CD that he burned.  There's over 100 songs on it.  They take me waaay back.  Wish I still had the dancer body I once had. 

Queen, I'm not sure what the effects, if any, of Atripla would be on sugar.  Mine goes up and down, but I probably need to see a diabetes educator.  When I became diabetic, 6 or 7 years ago from what happened when I was in a coma, I was never really educated on what to eat, how much etc.  I was just put on Insulin and shown how to inject myself in the stomach.  I really need to get my sugars under control.  I hate it when my sugar crashes, like you said yours did the other day.  I start shaking and sweating.  I just love sweets so much, especially chocolate.  And I like pasta, which I know is carbs.  It's hard sometimes isn't it.

Cin, just hang in there with Stone.  It sounds like you're really close to being, if not already, the GF.  If he wants you to meet his family, it's not because he's planning on dumping you anytime.  Things will work out.  Just take it slow.  I also know you will find a job.  Like I said before, you put out good karma, so something good is going to happen.  It always work out that way-what people put out comes back.  I believe that and try to live by it.

Em, thanks for starting a new thread.  I guess we need to do that eventually.

Cristy, I'm thinking of you and sending peace your way. 

I hope the rest of you ladies are having a good start to the weekend!  More later-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline camille07

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #6 on: September 14, 2007, 11:00:52 PM »
Dear Queenie-

I'm sorry for the confusion at the rite aid....they are everything but a "rite aid", I've changed my pharmacies to CVS for similar reasons. its so frustrating I know...but I'm not sure if I should be writing on this thread regarding that because I'm so far behind.

Cindy- hang in there.  It's not so bad.  I mean this in all the love of my heart......you're beautiful....really...and you're dating....and moving on with your life...I give you kudos for everything you've been through.  You're a champion....and when you're feeling bad just think there are people out there saying "I'd give what she's got."  Keep going.....a job is a job, but you are strong girl and don't let that neg voice get you down.  Be a voice for all of us...tough with vehemence. 

Betty-   I smoked for years. I went to art school in NYC and never smoked. Long story short, I started around 23 and stopped at 30.  It's tough, but I did it and I am the poster child for addiction so you can get through this.

Promise to be here, I hate being out of all the chat.

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #7 on: September 14, 2007, 11:57:03 PM »
HI GFs~

Wow, TY Queen, Betty and Cam......sweet words from all of you, which is what I really need right now.  I am doing pretty good tonight, calm but teetering on the edge of excitement.  I spoke with Stone earlier and we will head towards WV tomorrow afternoon.  I will follow in case Stone and his son decide to stay overnight and I want to go home.  Its supposed to be absolutely BEAUTIFUL weather here tomorrow, high near 70, bright and sunny, winds breezy at 25mph.  Feels like Fall to me!  I see myself sitting with Mom and sis, maybe 14yo niece, and talking girl talk.  It would be nice if Stone sat with us too, but all of that estrogen might scare him off, he'll prob be playing with his son.

I went to the support group tonight.  It was the leader, me and only two other women.  A guy showed up but we told him it was "Ladies' Night" and he had to leave.  LOL  Interestingly enough, the topic was dating and disclosure.  I had a lot to share.  It was a cozy atmosphere and I felt good.  Sadly, the founder of this local organization died from resistance complications just this past March, very sad.  I hope I can make a difference for some people.  Already tonight I learned that there are new stages of meds due to be released this year, 5th and 6th stages/groups, I believe.  It makes me hopeful!   :)

Well, I am mellow tonight, thinking about tomorrow's journey, over the river and through the woods to "mom's" house we go.  I am happy to be meeting some women and members of Stone's family.  Yes, this DOES say a lot about him, doesn't it?  I think his mom and I will hit it off pretty well, and I am looking forward to that.  I don't know what women they are used to meeting from Stone, but I am confident I will make a good impression tomorrow.  I like it when I feel GOOD!

Just trying not to think about unemployment and food stamps yet......save that for Monday.

Sweet Dreams All,

~Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline camille07

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #8 on: September 15, 2007, 01:27:06 AM »
I thought about myself tonight and this is what I came up with and I was happy to see the chronology, and i put the health issue last, to me that is great.

I am a girl
I am a woman
I have a strong faith in God
I have a strong faith in myself
I am a good friend
I am a good person and would help anyone
I am a woman who is struggling through my own devices
I am a person who knows literature and poetry
I am a person who know art
I am a person who has a house
I am a person who is creative
I am a person who knows loves
I am a person with HIV

Offline camille07

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #9 on: September 15, 2007, 01:59:29 AM »
I also want to add this is my personal experience

Offline cjc

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #10 on: September 15, 2007, 04:35:10 AM »
Hello ladies. .                                                                            Em, like the new thread title.  Not much going on new here but lots going on in my head. will be anxiously awaiting the update on your date .                                                                                             Queen, sorry you haven't felt well. Having diabetes and HIV together must be a bitch. Yes, a little exercise would help Boo but he may just have to force himself to eat. I have to do that a lot , even the green doesn't make me very hungry anymore. I have lost 25 Pd's since February and i think it's all my ass. My shorts fall down my hips when I'm walking around, It's kinda funny. Mind, I still weigh 165 so it isn't like i look like I'm starving. Hope he improves.                                               ML, you will find a job soon. I hope you have fun in WV with Stone and his son. Sounds like a good idea, ya'll joining forces. It would help both of you and probably be quite pleasant.                                  Betty, sounds like you had a great time out with your friend. I have been trying to get my cousin to go out but she has a fairly new baby so it'll probably be awhile. Thank you for sending peace my way, I need it                                                                              Okay, I said i am talking to Florida #1 again, lets call him J. So that's going okay, he's talking about flying up here in October and us spending the weekend together. I am really attracted to his personality and He's got that black hair, blue eyed thing going on that I like. It's a wait and see thing. I was going to drive down there in late June but he pissed me off and I told him about it , then he went back to his ex. When he called back, I told him that I couldn't talk to him if he was with her so I didn't. Now he's home and we're talking. Trying not to get my hopes up to much but I am soooooo lonely. I need friends and a social life as much as I need a man but it's hard. I have ya'll but we can't go to the mall or a movie, we are all too far away.                                                         there is this guy at work that has been chasing me, subtly, for months. I have been telling him , I don't date, I have serious medical issues. So, Thursday, I finally told him I have HIV. Actually I stood there and gave him hints until he figured it out. I am kinda nervous about this, even though I have been able to trust him with everything else I have told him, If he had  repeated any of it, I would have known, but this is huge, I could lose my job over it if he said anything. This is the first time I've told anyone other than family and medical staff. I saw him Friday for a minute when I went in for lunch shift and he told me I'm not the only one in this boat. Anyway, big step for me.                                                                My oldest son keeps calling but we won't answer the phone. He is trying to run the same game as always but we are very tired of it. So, no calls, no canteen, no letters, no nothing. I am not gonna be  50 and catering to him for the rest of my life. But it's eating all of us up. we want to do for him but he acts like he's entitled and it's old. Just venting on that one.         Obviously I can't sleep. Too much in my head. I will update again soon.   Love ya'll.   Cristy
« Last Edit: September 15, 2007, 09:34:14 PM by cjc »

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #11 on: September 15, 2007, 07:48:48 AM »
Good morning ladies:
   Cin, have fun with Stone.  Sometimes it's good for all of us to get away from our usual circumstances for awhile.  I'm sure you'll hit it off with everyone in his family that you meet.  Just relax, be yourself and have fun!

Cristy, I am so proud of you for not giving into your son's demands.  That's a hard thing to do.  It's like on one hand, you love him and want him to "get better;" and on the other hand, you know what'll happen if you give into him.  Just keep hanging in there.  Maybe he'll get the message.  Or maybe he thinks he can wear you down.  Just remember, if nothing changes, nothing changes.

Love the post, Cam, where you describe yourself as different things and living with HIV comes in last.  That's really great.  Hey, I am the poster child for addiction also.  But you know what, I had an easier time (mentally anyway) kicking heroin and later Methadone than these damn cigarettes.  I smoked for 30 years.  But the results of quitting are almost instantaneous, so I'm hanging in there.

Today I'm going to see about a little part-time job delivering papers.  I usually have a hard time trying to get a job because I have tattoos on both my hands, which was a dumb move.  When I got them, I figured I'd never look for work again in my life.  But with the new meds, I really want to work part-time while in school.  A little extra money never hurts.  Maybe I can get the job delivering the papers, because I don't really see where tattoos would make a difference there.  But who knows.  I always have to worry about covering being out-of-work since 1993 or '94 (it's been so long, even I forgot. :D).  I also have to study.  Yesterday I wrote my paper for my philosophy class, so that's done.  All I have to do is study my Counseling Theories book.  I might go to Goodwill and see what they have and try to get a few things for my fall wardrobe.  Like Cin said, fall is in the air.  I'm going to take the air conditioner out of the window today, as I don't think we're going to get anymore really hot weather.  Another summer is almost gone....  Hope everyone's doing alright.  More later-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline cjc

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #12 on: September 15, 2007, 09:19:52 AM »
Just remember, if nothing changes, nothing changes.


                                                                                  thanks Betty. That is so true. If we keep giving him everything,then he will continue to take everything for granted.       love Ya'll.   Cristy

Offline camille07

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #13 on: September 15, 2007, 10:23:11 AM »
Christy-  That was really courageous telling your co worker and I happy that he took it well.  I have to say that is the hardest thing about HIV "for me".   Its tough.  Accolades to you.

Betty-  Yes, I know people that quit heroin years ago and still struggle  with smoking.  Me thinks there is something going in those horrible little sticks.

Has anyone heard from christine lately?  I don't think she posted on our hen house threads.  I was just concerned, haven't heard from her in awhile.

Hope all you GF's have a great Saturday.  Kind of rainy here, but nice and dreamy, nostalgic of fall mornings.

Vaya con dios   :D

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #14 on: September 15, 2007, 10:55:29 AM »
Quick note because I had thought of this before....

Betty, as far as the lapse in your job history, could you say you were raising a child?  Your own or a niece, etc?  Its really no one's business, but it might be easier than saying you had health issues.  Just say you're returning to the work force after raising a niece, or your daughter, or whatever you feel works.  A little lie is nothing when it comes to our personal lives versus a nosey employer.  Besides, a lot of women return to the work force after raising kids for years.  On that note, you could say you were a stay at home Mom, and that you were recently divorced....something along those lines, that's why you're returning to work.

What a beautiful breezy morning here.  I have to go get ready.  My luck, today will be the one day Stone gets out of the house early, but I doubt it!

I'll post tonight or tomorrow.

~Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #15 on: September 15, 2007, 12:48:17 PM »
Betty, I know how you feel about those tats. I have the same problem, I usually cover up (handy living in a cold country). I even invested a 100 pounds in body makeup, I was fooled by the advertisments, but it's not much of a cover. I don't know if yours are on your hands or on your arms. Although I didn't have much luck with the makeup yet, you might want to give it a try. I don't worry about work so much but I will when I move to spain, which is conservative, and also every time I meet my BF's parents - I try to make that happen in the winter, as the summer is so sweltering there no way I could get away with long sleeves.

Anyway once you get your degree I am sure they won't get in the way of becoming a councellor.

Great weather here today, real automn, colors starting to change.

Peace to everyone,

"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #16 on: September 15, 2007, 01:31:12 PM »
According to my internal clock, Em is in her 2nd date with Mr Gent right about now, while Cind is befriending Family Stone. Good luck and good fun. And Camille when you have time, fill us in on that sweeping romance of yours. I hope you don't think I'm nosy, i like hearing happy stories, they give me hope and uplift me.

On a completely different topic, Cristy, I was somewhat like your son when growing up, I was a menace, I didn't get is as much trouble with the law, luckily, but I sure got in a lot of trouble, quit school, did drugs, etc. I work up to reality when i finally understood that I will suffer whatever consequences as an adult and not as a child anymore. By that time my parents had given up on me. So I hope very much this will happen to your son. It took me a long time to climb out of there though. If he shows real change of heart and an inclination to change he will need a hand. But you will know when it is sincere I imagine.

Queen, I am sorry your sugars are acting up, and what's this about your liver? I know you won't like me saying this, but it is possible that weed affects the liver like alcohol? I really don't know but it's worth looking up. I am sorry things are so tough. But I think once you get used to the meds, and your T cells will rise, you will feel better. It had a big impact on my mood (not that I am Miss Cheerful now, but compared to before...). Also when you get settled down and all the hassles of moving subside. So that is something to look forward to. Please take good care.

Hugs to all,
« Last Edit: September 15, 2007, 01:36:08 PM by Dragonette »
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline emeraldize

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #17 on: September 15, 2007, 04:01:43 PM »
I think you're all incredible. And, I wish I owned a magic wand that I would use and lend liberally.

Some serious doo-doo has hit the life fan and I gotta do something about it asap. And, former smoker that I am, I'm lighting up way too many AM E-Menthol 100's and then, I'm e-chaining once I've lit one.

The old physics adage " A body in motion stays in motion, a body at rest stays at rest." comes into play every time I park myself in front of the computer. I have to step away and get some major things accomplished. Fast.

And, I've decided that Mr. Gentle Man (yep, your clock is just about right Drag -- supposed to see him tomorrow, but may try to move it up to coffee tonight.) must be made aware of "the potential dealbreaker" as I no longer desire to fuss about the right time, place, how much heart/soul invested, etc., etc.  I'm acceptable as I am and if this news frightens him off, so be it. I wish him well.

I can't waste any more precious minutes wondering about nor forecasting rejection. There are so few allotted. I was already ready to do this and Cristy's little collegial success at work was the karmic clue to move on it.

Chat atcha soon.

Em

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #18 on: September 15, 2007, 09:31:54 PM »
Well, aren't you ladies the busy little bees..Not to worry, I will guard this here hen house whilst you all are away... ;D You ladies are all inspiring and I often wish I could venture out like you all but I am just not ready yet. Night 2 of  Atripla was ok except that my tummy kept feeling queasy. I hadn't eaten anything since 9:30pm and has designated 12:30am as the time to take my meds. I kept my balance but had a bit of a time going to sleep even though it seems I get tired shortly after taking them. I don't know what the hell is going on with my sugar and why it peaked like that. Woke up this afternoon, determined to sleep in and it was 91. The only date I have is with the Sci-Fi channel watching the Highlander movie....


Camille-- It's good to see you post again, was quite worried about you. I hope things are well with you and Ian which I'm sure it is.

Cindy-- As I have told you, I bet your trip today went just fine.

Christy-- Sorry to hear your oldest boy is up to his old tricks. You're doing the right thing. Stick to your guns, girl.

Em-- Sorry to heat about the shit hitting the fan, I'm sure you are handling it. I hope things work out for you on your date.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

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Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #19 on: September 16, 2007, 12:07:00 AM »
*Sez Hello and hears an echo*.....Goes back to the front of the hen house with her 12 gage and stands watch...
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline emeraldize

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #20 on: September 16, 2007, 07:44:50 AM »
Saw a fox darting toward the cornfield. Must have heard you cock the trigger.


Last night, I left the site. Made the call. GM returned the call. We met. Walked. Great sunset. Talked. I explained my potential deal breaker. Walked. Talked. Sat on his porch. He explained his potential deal breaker. 10:30 went to dinner. Parted company. Everything is fine. No rejection. No tears. No fears. Laughter. Relief. Found some astounding common denominators. No, not +. Monday, he's making dinner for two. And, the steeplechase of life goes on.

To the practical...GQ, are you drinking enough water when you take your meds?


Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #21 on: September 16, 2007, 07:59:40 AM »
Last night, I left the site. Made the call. GM returned the call. We met. Walked. Great sunset. Talked. I explained my potential deal breaker. Walked. Talked. Sat on his porch. He explained his potential deal breaker. 10:30 went to dinner. Parted company. Everything is fine. No rejection. No tears. No fears. Laughter. Relief. Found some astounding common denominators. No, not +. Monday, he's making dinner for two. And, the steeplechase of life goes on.

whooooohoooooooooo!
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline Ann

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #22 on: September 16, 2007, 09:47:05 AM »
But you know what, I had an easier time (mentally anyway) kicking heroin and later Methadone than these damn cigarettes.  I smoked for 30 years.

Same here, Betty. I didn't even need methadone, but ciggies? Forget it!

I wasn't able to get Chantix in Liverpool (the primary care trust there hasn't given it budgetary approval) but I found out I can get it here on the Rock from my GP. I'm just getting over a chest infection and he'll write the script in a week or two. Trying Chantix is my last resort.

I was going to say that I haven't smoked for quite thirty years, but then I remembered how old I am and - yep, it's been thirty years all right!  :o :P >:( Time flies when you're chain-smoking! ;D

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline cjc

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #23 on: September 16, 2007, 03:46:52 PM »
Saw a fox darting toward the cornfield. Must have heard you cock the trigger.


Last night, I left the site. Made the call. GM returned the call. We met. Walked. Great sunset. Talked. I explained my potential deal breaker. Walked. Talked. Sat on his porch. He explained his potential deal breaker. 10:30 went to dinner. Parted company. Everything is fine. No rejection. No tears. No fears. Laughter. Relief. Found some astounding common denominators. No, not +. Monday, he's making dinner for two. And, the steeplechase of life goes on.

To the practical...GQ, are you drinking enough water when you take your meds?


                                                                                Em, I am so happy for you.I  am sorry that you will not be able to spend quite so much time here but ecstatic that your life is going well and you are doing well.                                                           Personally, i have decided  that if my coworker can be so accepting, then maybe I should come out of my safe little nest I have here(Home, Am, work) and live more. J is going to be kicked to the curb. I've spoken with him once this weekend so that tells me I am not a priority.      ladies hope all are well. will check back in soon. I think I will round up my  boy and head to Walmart.   Later.  Cristy

Offline sunseeker

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #24 on: September 16, 2007, 05:43:35 PM »
Hi GF's

Just doing a quick check in to say hi.  No much going on here except tired as can be.  I am playing mommy for 5 days to my 8 month old teeting niece and my very active 4 year old nephew.  So i am chasing and cleaning and cleaning some more.  I will check in later in the week. 

Hope everyone is doing well.

:)   SS

Offline shotis

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #25 on: September 16, 2007, 05:54:41 PM »
please help me l am confused
Reply #12 on: Today at 05:47:53 PM    

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
l met my boyfriend/partner on this site about nine months ago.... and we've been happy, although we  quarrelled a lot first few months, as we were both new to this but have passed that phase now. l have been good to this guy doing things for him and vice verse, my problem is, the guy never mentions his family to me or me to his family, its like l am a guarded secret. l have asked several times about his family,he has told me that he has a sister who lives  in the states and a brother in Canada, truth be told l have never heard him talk to his brother or sister over the phone,unlike me l am always open and talk to my relatives all the time and I've even introduced him to them.

today l asked him about our relationship, what he wants from this and when will he introduce me to his relatives, he tells me l am pushing him, then l said to him what do you mean? is it wrong for me to know your close relatives? He now thinks all l want is  marriage from him,l love him but l don't know whether to continue with relationship with no future or get out before l get hurt further. Ladies do you think he has another girl out there?
what are the signs? Has anyone met a guy,partner,boyfriend or husband from these dating sites? what have you experienced?

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #26 on: September 16, 2007, 06:40:51 PM »
Shotis~~

First, is this a pm? And if so, is this person ok with you posting it here? I am assuming you got this person's permission. She has been dating the guy for 9 months and they look out for each other but she is concerned because he does not speak about his family....In anyway?  I really don't speak about mine much either other than to warn someone how they are. Most here know my story with my family. Maybe it is the same with him, maybe he is not close with his family but he did say she needs to stop pushing, well maybe she should stop pushing. What is her need to meet his family? It sounds like to me that he doesn't want to talk about them til he is ready and if she continues to keep pushing she may just lose him. I kinda can relate to him not wanting to talk about them so maybe the other ladies will give better advice...
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #27 on: September 16, 2007, 08:41:56 PM »
Good evening ladies:
  Well, it's day #7 without cigarettes!  Ann, I really think the Chantix is working wonders.  Am I was mentally ready to quit.  I just got sooo tired of coughing up stuff, having constant sinus infections, my breath, clothes, house, car etc. smelling horrible, my poor cat having to live with second-hand smoke, and the cost.  It just isn't worth it to me.  I'm not one of those "happy reformed smokers" however, who go about preaching to the still-remaining smokers.  I know how hard it is to quit and would never down anyone for smoking.
     I'm getting ready to watch a movie, "Hustle and Flow," that I rented from the library.  I've never seen it and heard it's really good. 
     I hope all the ladies dating on here are doing well.  Cin, I will really consider telling a perspective employer that I was raising a niece.  That's a really good idea.  How's the time with Stone going?  How did it go when you met his family?  I know it probably went perfectly.  Like I said, Cin, you put out good karma, so expect good things.
     Em and Camille, wow, you guys are getting more action than I am.  I hope everything's going well.
     Queen- what's happening with your sugars now?  You know, mine are still crazy.  I've been eating a lot of things I shouldn't be eating.  But with this grieving of my mom and giving up cigarettes, it's so hard to stay away from the chocolate and various confections.  I hope you're doing alright.  I'm glad your second night on Atripla went better.  You know, when I get that "drunk" feeling from Sustiva, I just go with it. ;)  I tend to like it.

Hope all you ladies are doing well.  Hang in there!
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #28 on: September 16, 2007, 09:21:42 PM »
Betty~~ My sugar was pretty decent today. Just a high of 153, not overly concerned with that since my fasting sugar was 98. I ate some asparagus fried in olive oil for breakfast. If anything made it go up it was prolly the green tea I was drinking. I also had a beer while over my best friend's house washing some clothes. My next dose isn't due til around the time I take my Atripla so I'm pretty much ok. I am thinking the worst may be over with the Atripla side effects, keep fingers crossed.

Hustle & Flow was a pretty good movie. It's based off of one of the rappers from the group 3-6 Mafia so I was told by someone, prolly my son. But I always thought Terrance Howard (who plays DJ) was a good actor. And then my fave rapper Ludacris is in it too. I think I have watched that movie like 50 million times. At the moment I am watching Iron Chef America. It seems the other cable stations are playing the Resident Evil movies to death since Resident Evil Extinction comes out Friday. I will have that in my collection when it comes out on dvd, already has the other 2.

I have been kinda concerned about Cindy too. I thought by now we would've heard something. Maybe she is having the time of her life with his fam, that's the story I am sticking to it til she tells us something different. I am happy for Em and her dude too, glad there was no issues with disclosing.

I guess that leaves me and Christy w/o dudes even though I do have Boo online. I am just wondering what J did to piss Christy off so that she called it off again. But I don't blame her, life is too short for the games and the drama. As far as Boo, we talked last night but am really wanting to see him more than ever. I know this is because I have been concerned over his health and eating. I told him if I was there I would cook him a bunch of stuff that he could freeze and reheat later. As much as I would like to be there, I don't see it happening anytime soon. Just not financially possible and really don't like to travel during the winter months. That is all I have to report for now......
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline belief

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #29 on: September 16, 2007, 11:33:34 PM »
meds, moving, madness and men...i think i can relate! 

i've been reading through some of the the dating threads and would love to join in...this is such a positive place to be, it's great to see so many women here moving forward with their lives and finding happiness!  whether it's with finding a partner to share life with, taking care of a child, doing something healthy for yourself (ie: quiting smoking!!  good job betty!) or just plain living - it's a wonderful thing to see.

an update...i have a son who will be 5 in november...and as some of you may know we lost his dad, my husband back in may to suicide.  my son has been having a very difficult time with things lately, he realized the other day that everyone else has a dad, but he doesn't...and he doesn't understand why he isn't coming back.  plus, he is extremely worried that i am going to leave him and not come back - to me, that is the most heartbreaking thing in the world.  i am going to be taking him in to see a child psychologist in a couple of weeks...i just want the best for him and i'm not sure i can do it on my own...

a little bit of madness...i was sick all weekend! i'm thinking it was food poisoning but can't be sure as everytime i eat since that incident it has come right out of me.  plus...i'm so super tired.  i even took a nap today...which is so rare but i couldn't funtion without it. 

i hope to be here again soon...and i hope this finds everyone doing well.

'night
5/07 - viral load: 28,890  CD4: 514 
8/07 - viral load: 38,710  CD4: 451
9/07 - viral load: 47,000  CD4: 467
11/07 - viral load: 17,600 CD4: 421

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #30 on: September 17, 2007, 12:27:07 AM »
Hi GFs~

I am alive and well, ended up staying at Stone's sister's place overnight last night.  I met his son, mom, sis, brother in law, and niece.  We had fun but I couldn't sleep at all, lol!  By 730am this morning I finally dozed off, and got maybe two hours' sleep.  Stone wanted to ride his kid around on the lawn mower, so then he ends up cutting the lawn -- about 2.5 acres!  He kept stopping and saying he felt bad, for not hanging with me.  I said it was OK, I was having fun with the kids and the dogs, all of which were on the trampoline.  I was taking pictures of all of them and the weather was perfect, so I didn't mind at all.  I figured Stone would be busy with something besides me, just didn't think it would be 2+ acres of lawn!  LOL 

His son was nice enough, but then started acting like any little boy would.  He kept eating sweets and spoiled his dinner, and then he tried to pull that crap again this morning and I called him on it.  Mom sis and I hid the chocolates and the son didn't eat any breakfast!  Stone got ticked I guess cause we all ganged up on him, I dunno.  It wasn't that the kid was looking for chocolate, but he knew he would get a rise out of us so he started playing games.  Us women just looked at Stone like "What are you gonna do?"  and he was indifferent, then he and his mom had a little spat.  Nothing major, mountain out of a molehill thing, but I think it really bugged the two of them.  Well, then Stone and his kid went to ride dirt bikes so that broke up the tension some.  He was still a little "perplexed" by his mom when we left today.

My insulin pump ran out of insulin this morning while I was there so I had to start giving shots every hour with my pen, which I carry for back-up, but it worked out OK. 

I called Stone tonight around 8pm and got voice mail -- I'm hoping he's not pissed at me about the issues with his son.  I guess he felt maybe I overstepped my bounds or that we were all ganging up on him.  Wait till the kid is 12, I say.......gheez.

So, I have been IMing Queen, wondering if I am getting the silent treatment from him or not.  Somehow I don't think so.  I think he was just really tired from the visit, as was I, so we'll probably talk tomorrow.

It sounds like a lot of us have been venturing into the world of disclosure, and I say you can never get enough practice with that, as difficult as it is.  I disclosed online one night last week to a guy I dated briefly back in 2001.  He lives 75 miles away and we only saw each other once, but this year he showed up on IM again, after all this time.  He is going through a messy divorce (what the hell else is new?) and seems kinda emotional sometimes, like he wants someone to chat with.  I wanted to let him know I kinda had my own troubles, so I disclosed to him.  He was all worried about me, and seemed to be OK with the pos thing.  He's a good friend and I would hate it if this scared him off, but I don't see why it should.

Hi Belief, I saw you posted while I was.  Hang in there, I know your story and I am so terribly sorry that things have gone this way for you, losing your husband as you did.  All you can do is just give tons and tons of love to your little one, you know that.  I can't imagine being that age and not having my father anymore.  My parents divorced when I was 5, but mom did a really good job of keeping my brother and I happy, and its not the same as losing someone to suicide.  I think the therapy is a great idea, to help deal with emotions on a very gentle level.  Please let us know how you two are doing, ok?

Shotis, I read your post about meeting family, and I just met Stone's, as you've read.  I think how two people feel about family will tell a lot about compatibility and how things will go down the road.  I found myself talking about the virus many different times over the past two days with Stone's mom and sis, sharing my experience and also hearing it from them, about what they all went through.  It was a very close call when he was hospitalized, and it brought a big family even closer together, as much as he hates the stigma.  It was his wife who let him down back then, selfish of her, she left him over it, but I think they had trouble before, anyway.  So, you may want to express your feelings and if he keeps shooting you down, cause I think its yourself you're referring to, not sure, then maybe look for greener pastures?  Easier said than done, I know.

OK, post is way too long, as usual, and Sustiva is kickin', but congrats to Em for putting the cards on the table.  I am so happy that GMs response was kind, same boat even?  Its nice when two can relate like that, even if he's not pos.  Reminds me that we ALL have things we deal with everyday, and they just make us who we are -- stronger, too!

Hi to Drag, Cam, Cristy, Ann, SS (good luck with those kids!) and BT.  GF Queen has already got the play by play in an IM, so she's back out front guarding the roost, I think, lol.

Sleep well, all, and now I must COPY this thread, cause if it gets lost in computerland, there will be some really hot wings a flappin' over here, lol!   :D

~Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #31 on: September 17, 2007, 07:14:25 AM »
Good morning ladies:
 
Got up early this morning to relieve Queen of her duty of guarding this roost! :D

Belief, my husband died in 1989 when I was in treatment.  My daughter was five at the time, just like your son.  I think the best way to reassure that you're not going to leave is to spend all the quality time you can with your son.  That's such a young, confusing age when a tragedy happens.  I am so sorry that it happened to you guys.  My husband's death wasn't suicide, per say.  He died from "acute alcohol intoxication."  He was a stone-cold alcoholic and basically slowly committed suicide from his drinking.  And he was only 29 when he died, so I really feel for you.  I think taking your son to see a child psychologist is an excellent idea.  They know best how to deal with things like this.

Queen, I'm glad the Atripla is going better for you.  I wish I had my sugars under control like yours are.  It's so damn hard for me to stay away from the sweet stuff.  I don't know how you do it. 

Cindy, I'm glad your weekend with Stone's family went well.  I doubt Stone is pouting over what happened with his son.  I know sometimes parents are extremely defensive when it comes to their children, but I'm sure he got over any bad feelings.  Like you said, he was probably wore out and needed some rest.  Maybe it was a bit overwhelming for him. 

Well, it's day #8 for me being smoke-free.  I'm going to exercise this morning.  I wish I could do more when it comes to exercising, but, as probably some of you have read before, my left kneecap is broken and the cartilage in it it collapsed; and my right kneecap's cartilage is collapsing.  That came from when the last man I had a relationship with pushed me down a flight of stairs.  What an asshole he was.  He ended up hitting me and I called the police after he went to bed and they woke him up and put him out.  Anyway, I hope you ladies are all having a peaceful morning.  I know, I'm usually the first one to post in the morning. ;)  Don't know why I'm up so early this morning.  Oh yeah!  I'm relieving Queen! :D  Take it easy everybody-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline emeraldize

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #32 on: September 17, 2007, 08:43:20 AM »
I am so happy that GMs response was kind, same boat even? 
~Cindy

Please see previous post.  Gotta get ready for work. Please excuse brevity.

No, not +.

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #33 on: September 17, 2007, 11:21:54 AM »
Hello Ladies---

Nothing to report today really. Just sort of feeling let down today, can't really go into details about it but is just how I am feeling. But as they say shit happens, so I am feeling disgusted and thinks I am going back to bed.
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #34 on: September 17, 2007, 11:22:51 AM »
Please see previous post.  Gotta get ready for work. Please excuse brevity.

No, not +.


Hi Em~  I know he's not pos, I was referring to "Found some astounding common denominators."  Its these commonalities that made me comment "same boat."  

C'mon, you think my post to you would've been that brief if he WERE pos!?  I would be singing from the hilltops, GF!  Wouldn't that be a coincidence!  Nevertheless, I AM happy that you guys have shared some things with each other and are comfortable.  Have a great dinner!

~Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline cjc

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #35 on: September 17, 2007, 03:24:09 PM »
Hello ladies. Glad to see so many checking in.                                 Queen, I', sorry you feel bad today. Mentally or physically,either way feeling bad sucks(and not in a good way)!

I guess that leaves me and Christy w/o dudes even though I do have Boo online. I am just wondering what J did to piss Christy off so that she called it off again. But I don't blame her, life is too short for the games and the drama.
   Yes, this leaves me without a guy. Basically, it's what you said, games and Drama.   I talked to him once this weekend which pissed me off cause he said he would call. I hate it when someone says they are going to do something and then doesn't do it.there was already a trust issue from last time I was talking to him and he has several other things that are just too much to deal with.        Something else was: I disclosed to one of my coworkers and it went over really well. I am amazed. I did tell him we can't date but I told him Why and he says he admires me for that. He says he will get me to change my mind . So maybe I will broaden my horizons. It's just kinda scary.                                                           Sunseeker, you have my sympathy. I only have 1( 4 YO) but he can be a handful especially if I were to be distracted with another child. He is opportunistic as all children are. Sugar free Popsicles are a good way to get my son's attention.We have Sugar free lemonade and Nesquick as well. I try to limit his sugar. Enjoy, they are precious even if a LOT of work. hope everything else is going well  for you.                                                                                Betty, Yahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!  Glad you are on day 8 now. You should be very proud of yourself. When i get ready to quit, I will try the Chantrix since  it's working so well for you.                                    Belief, glad to hear from you. I feel for you and your son. I know it must break your heart for him to be hurting.i like what Betty said, just spend as much Quality time with him as you can. Hope things get easier. I admire that you are getting him therapy. At least he still has you to take care of him. Sorry you had food poisoning over the weekend. It may be a stomach virus, though. Just a thought, you would know better than I since it is your body. Hope you get to feeling better.                                                                          Em, hope work goes well today.I am actually off on Mondays and have been being lazy. I worked 4 days in a row so I am tired.  Hope GM can cook and you really enjoy it.                                                       ML , sounds like you had a interesting weekend. glad you got to meet Stone's family. That sounds scary, running out of insulin(in the pump) and having to give yourself shots in the stomach.

I called Stone tonight around 8pm and got voice mail -- I'm hoping he's not pissed at me about the issues with his son.  I guess he felt maybe I overstepped my bounds or that we were all ganging up on him.  Wait till the kid is 12, I say.......gheez.



~Cindy
                                                                      Exactly, if he is pissed he will get over it, I hope. People are funny about their children but it sounds like the boy was taking advantage. All children do that if they feel they can. Glad ya'll stopped him. I bet Stone will call you tonight..                                                               Anyone i forgot, hope life is treating you well.   Love ya'll.  Cristy

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #36 on: September 17, 2007, 05:00:23 PM »
Christy~~

I am the same way, I hate when someone tells me they are going to do something then doesn't do it or just doesn't say anything at all. That's what I mean when I say I don't handle disappointment well at all. I'm feeling ok physically today but feels that I got fucked over mentally, I guess. I suppose it is my fault for trusting people at their word.

There are other things still in play here like neither school has gotten back with me about my son. My son is also driving me up a wall too because I am going out my way to do things for him but he acts like it is my job to make sure he gets to work everyday. For the past 2 weeks I made sure he got to work including letting him take my car which is already busted up and he comes back with more damage on it. His excuse, it happened at work and someone must've hit my car. In reality, I think he hit a pole or something in my car but I will never know. Most of the day I have just been disgusted and in bed. I will prolly stay in bed the rest of the day, I feel depressed beyond words...Hope everyone else is having a better day than me...
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #37 on: September 17, 2007, 08:09:29 PM »
Hi GFs~

Somber mood tonight, so I'm sorry this is short.  I think I will have more to say tomorrow.

I got a call from an ad I replied to last week in the paper, and I have an interview set for this Friday -- GOOD!

Stone called at 5:30pm tonight in between jobs and didn't bring anything up about his son.  I brought it up and I listened to him.  I didn't agree with what he had to say,  and said I'd like to talk about it later.  He was/is more concerned about his mother trying to discipline the child.  So, all in all -- GOOD!

My mother called and my brother was deployed again today -- BAD, very BAD!

This is why I am somber, I hope he comes home safely, but before he does, I hope he guns down some serious Taliban ASS from that Chinook helicopter!

More tomorrow, I have to be at SSA at 8am (OMG) to apply for utility assistance...   :o

~Cindy
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #38 on: September 17, 2007, 08:59:51 PM »
Cindy~~ Sorry about your brother being shipped out. Glad Stone called. Good Luck with interview.....
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline belief

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #39 on: September 17, 2007, 11:15:29 PM »
hi everyone...just wanted to pop in and say hello.  i am still battling the stomach flu tonight...whatever i eat seems to come right on out.   i just want it to stop - i can feel myself getting a little dehydrated and i'm not liking the feeling so much.

tonight i read my son the book "Oh, the Places You'll Go!" by Dr. Seuss...and i found it somewhat inspiring:

Here's a little bit of what i read:

i'm sorry to say so
but, sadly it's true
that bang-ups
and hang-ups
CAN happen to you.

you can get all hung up
in a prickle-ly perch.
and your gang will fly on.
you'll be left in a lurch.

you'll come down from the lurch
with an unpleasant bump,
and the chances are, then,
that you'll be in a slump.

and when you're in a slump,
you're not in for much fun.
un-slumping yourself
is not easily done.

you will come to a place where the streets are not marked,
some windows are lighted. but mostly they're darked.
a place you could sprain both your elbow and chin!
do you dare to stay out? do you dare to go in?
how much can you lose? how much can you win?

and IF you go in, should you turn left or right...
or right-and-three-quarters? or, maybe, not quite?
or go around back and sneak in from behind?
simple it's not, i'm afraid you will find,
for a mind maker-upper to make up his mind.

you can get so confused
that you'll start in to race
down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace
and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space,
headed, i fear, toward a most useless place.

the waiting place...

...for people just waiting.
waiting for a train to go
or a bus to come, or a plane to go
or the mail to come, or the rain to go
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
or waiting around for a yes or no
or waiting for their hair to grow.
everyone is just waiting.

waiting for the fish to bite
or waiting for wind to fly a kite
or waiting around for friday night
or waiting, perhaps, for their uncle jake
or a pot to boil, or a better break
or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants
or a wig with curls, or another chance.
everyone is just waiting.

NO!
that's not for you!

somehow you'll escape
all that waiting and staying.
you'll find the bright places
where Boom Bands are playing.


I guess to me it says a lot about living your life...what are we waiting for?  the time is now...enjoy your night ladies!
5/07 - viral load: 28,890  CD4: 514 
8/07 - viral load: 38,710  CD4: 451
9/07 - viral load: 47,000  CD4: 467
11/07 - viral load: 17,600 CD4: 421

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #40 on: September 17, 2007, 11:25:14 PM »
somehow you'll escape
all that waiting and staying.
you'll find the bright places
where Boom Bands are playing.

Belief~  I can totally relate to what you posted.  I have often felt like I am WAITING for my life to start over since my husband died in '96.  Hell, if I wait any longer, how much more will pass me by?

THIS....IS....life, and its what we make of it.

Pray for my brother, GFs, and sleep well tonight....

~Cindy

Hail to the Redskins!
« Last Edit: September 17, 2007, 11:27:18 PM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline emeraldize

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #41 on: September 18, 2007, 12:23:43 AM »
Hi Em~  I know he's not pos, I was referring to "Found some astounding common denominators."  Its these commonalities that made me comment "same boat." 


ML: I now understand what you wrote. Thanks for clarifying! We have writing, art and a bundle of other things in common. Congrats on the Friday interview.

CJC: Yes. He can cook! It was a New Mexican dinner and homemade salsa. Excellent! 

Much to my surprise and delight, this is working out, and I suspect it will be so for a long time.

Em

Em

Offline cjc

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #42 on: September 18, 2007, 11:01:52 AM »
Hello ladies. Not much new here. Ml, I will keep your brother in my thoughts and hope he comes home safely.Good luck with the interview and with SSA. Glad Stone was not mad at you. Take care.     Queen, sorry you were feeling like that. I went through similar stuff with my oldest, he just acts like we owe him. Hope your son is not so bad.And I HATE feeling like someone has fucked me over!!!!!! Hope things get better for you.                                                                   Em,


CJC: Yes. He can cook! It was a New Mexican dinner and homemade salsa. Excellent! 

Much to my surprise and delight, this is working out, and I suspect it will be so for a long time.

Em
   So very happy for you.Hope it is longterm and you are so happy that you can hardly stand it!!!!I feel your delight .                     Belief, like the doctor Seuss. Hope you get to feeling better soon. Try to eat some chicken noodle or something that will give your body the liquids you need.                                                         Well it's off to work for me, I have a lunch and dinner shift so I guess i will be working a  10 hour shift. But I asked for lunches, with Robert in school so my body will adjust. And then I can take the jeans I bought him back to Walmart and get him some that fit. He is a stocky little fellow and needs a 7 husky but they are hard to find within budget. Maybe I will set SSI soon, I am waiting for a hearing. My mom says I should get a lawyer, what do ya'll think about that Any advice on SSI or SSDI would be appreciated.                 Time to go, I will check in tonight after work.  Cristy
« Last Edit: September 18, 2007, 11:15:19 AM by cjc »

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #43 on: September 18, 2007, 11:14:51 AM »
Hi Em~  Its great that you foresee this relationship continuing on into the future!  What a relief it must be to have someone close that you can share things with, and learn more about.

I went to Social Services this morning and thank goodness I had phone numbers with me.  I was there very early, at 8am, and there were 50 people in front of me.  Turns out they were all applying for food stamps.  I called my connection upstairs and she sent someone down to get me, so I didn't have to wait.  I have been trying to email him my bank statement, but I can't get into Yahoo this morning to access email, weird.

I spoke to Stone a second time last night, it was nice.  He wants to see me tonight.  I am prob gonna crash and burn since I got up at 730am today.  I am NOT used to that at all, in fact I had the alarm set for 630am and had kept hitting snooze!

I am going to go get my hair cut today, even though I can't afford it.  I need to look nice for my interview this Friday.  If I could just get a job......Social Services building is right across the street from where I'll interview on Friday.  I walked along Carroll Creek in downtown Frederick.  Very pretty because it runs through the entire downtown area, and they have recently "rehabbed" it, putting in fancy brick walkways etc.

It was nice to get some fresh air, even though it was 39 degrees here this morning when I left my house!

I posted in the 9/11 thread last night, since my brother has been deployed.  I included a pic of him saying goodbye to his oldest.  It just breaks my heart that I can't do more for him....

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=15457.0

~Cindy
« Last Edit: September 18, 2007, 11:19:15 AM by MOONLIGHT1114 »
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline Dragonette

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #44 on: September 18, 2007, 11:55:54 AM »
PM en route
"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Offline Queen Tokelove

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #45 on: September 18, 2007, 01:15:22 PM »
Nothing to report.....Back to bed I go....
Started Atripla/Ziagen on 9/13/07.
10/31/07 CD4-265 VL- undetectable
2/6/08 CD4- 401 VL- undetectable
5/7/08 CD4- 705 VL- undetectable
6/4/08 CD4- 775 VL- undetectable
8/6/08 CD4- 805 VL- undetectable
11/13/08 CD4- 774 VL--undetectable
2/4/09  CD4- 484  VL- 18,000 (2 months off meds)
3/3/09---Starting Back on Meds---
4/27/09 CD4- 664 VL-- undetectable
6/17/09 CD4- 438 VL- 439
8/09 CD4- 404 VL- 1,600
01-22-10-- CD4- 525 VL- 59,000
Cherish the simple things life has to offer

The Royal Blog

Offline MOONLIGHT1114

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #46 on: September 18, 2007, 04:39:14 PM »
Thanks to both of you for the PM/IMs.....I'll reply directly soon!

Damn, I hear an echo in here.  Now I know how Queen felt the other night, lol!   :D   I'm so tired from getting up with the roosters today that I almost want to cancel tonight with Stone.  He hasn't even called me today to say if anything is definite.  He must have gotten some work lined up......

Going to shower and try to wake my ass up a little.....
HIV+ since '93, 1/12 - CD4 785 and undet.   WOO-HOO!!

Offline sunseeker

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #47 on: September 18, 2007, 10:41:15 PM »
Hi Girls

Well, I have survived the kids and have dropped them off wit my parents.  I came home and miss them already, but called and told them that Auntie misses them.   I think that I will have to go over there tomorrow after work and put them to bed.  Have not heard from Cop #1, its finally sinking in, and each day is getting easier but I don't know if I will ever get over him.  I guess that we all have that one guy or girl that got away.  But on a good note cop #2 texts me every day and today he sent me text saying that he was thinking of me and can't wait to have me come up there.  Part of me does not want to go and visit him since I know at some point that dreaded conversation will have to come up, but EM has given me hope. 

EM:  I miss IM'ing you.  I am so glad that things are progressing nicely with your man and I may need a pep talk come October when I go see Cop #2.  Not sure how to tell him. I may not even have to this visit.  I saw a new thread that was started about when to disclose, and I am struggling with when to disclose.  I waited and waited to disclose to cop #1 and part of me thinks the reason why he is not calling is because of my status even though he says no.  But that is just me and could be paranoid and really the reason why he is not calling due to everything he is dealing with.

Moon:  Sorry to hear about your brother.  I will pray that he will be safe.  I was glad to hear that stone was not mad at you.  I know how hard it can be to be around kids that are acting out and not being able to say anything and then when you do its hard to know how the parent may react.  Glad everything turned out and good luck with your interview.

Queen:  I am sorry to hear the struggles you are having with your son.  It sounds like he may need a swift kick in the butt.  It sounds like you have bended over backwards for him and he does not get it.  Now I am no parent and in no way giving parental advise so I hope I am not over stepping my bounds, but maybe when he has to hoof it to and from work he will have more respect for you, since you deserve it.

Belief:  Welcome and nice to meet you.

OK girls must get things ready for work and pack my lunch.  Made homemade corn and shrimp chowder tonight so maybe left overs.

:)  Sun






Offline BT65

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #48 on: September 19, 2007, 08:15:48 AM »
Good morning girls:

Cin, I am so sorry to hear about your brother.  I hope our president gets his head out of his ass and can see this "war" for what it is.  The troops need to come home already!

Cristy-I've been on SSDI for about 12 years.  Since you mentioned a hearing, I'm taking it that they turned you down once and you're appealing it, is this correct?  I was turned down the first time.  But I won on the appeal.  I didn't go to court though.  But I'll tell you what I did do.  I called my congressman's office and got them on disability's ass.  I also called the White House, because they have a department for hardship cases.  Now, of course, this was when Clinton was president and not the asshole that's president now.  But I'm sure they would still have that department.  I mean, that's what the government is (supposed) to be there for is the people!  I wasn't working either when I appealed it.  I was told that if you're working, you probably won't get it.  I wish you luck on that.  Social security can be such a hassle getting, but it's like gold once you have it.

Queen- I hope you're feeling better.  I'm so sorry that your oldest son is taking advantage of you like that.  Kids will walk all over you as long as you let them.  How old is he? 

To all the rest of you ladies-I hope ya'all are doing alright.  It's day #10 for me without cigarettes.  I still want one from time to time and sometimes the urge is strong.  But I have some flavored chewing sticks and suckers that I use.  Take care-
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Offline cjc

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Re: Dating Thread Part VI: Meds, Moving, Madness and Men
« Reply #49 on: September 19, 2007, 03:52:40 PM »
Hello Ladies. went to the dentist today.I was so proud of Robert, no crying , minimal squirming, he was very good. We go at the same time since all our medical  offices are a hour and a half round trip.                       Betty, Thank you. My mom says the same thing that if I'm working I probably won't get it. I have been denied twice and am awaiting a hearing
  I was told that if you're working, you probably won't get it.  I wish you luck on that.  Social security can be such a hassle getting, but it's like gold once you have it.


                                                                                  I am able to work parttime but would go down pretty fast if I had to work full time. The SSI would be a huge help but I don't want to give up my job.I wish I could take a leave of absence but they already gave me a month off for my hysterectomy. I think I will call a lawyer and see if they can help. Thank you again for the advice. I am doing well. Been shopping for school clothes for Rob and finally feel confident he has enough. I immediately change his clothes when he gets home so that keeps them nice a little longer. Sunseeker, hope things go well with cop # 2. Probably # 1 is just caught up in his own stuff. I understand doing the "what might have been " stuff but it will get easier with time. I kinda feel like that with the one I just stopped talking to but he doesn't know how to act so is not for me.                                                              Anyway, hope everyone is well. Later.   Cristy

 


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