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Author Topic: Completely Terrified  (Read 3649 times)

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Offline dumbblonde

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Completely Terrified
« on: September 06, 2007, 10:27:08 PM »
I'm a 19 year old girl living in a relatively big city in Canada. I've never been promiscuous or had the desire to do so. Unfortunately, a few months ago I met a very very Mr.Wrong, a guy who I thought had genuine interest me but turned out only had the desire to sleep with me. I ended up drinking a lot with him and we ended up having unprotected sex to my deepest regret. The past few months have been horrible for me, I've been a giant ball of stress and have worried extensively about what consequences I could face. I got tested for STI's at a Planned Parenthood clinic, where I tested negative for all STI's but did test positive for a yeast infection which I have since treated. Strangely, the clinic, before allowing for testing does a counselling session with the patient, asking questions about the encounter and why the patient is being tested, etc. Anyhow, when I mentioned sex without a condom the HIV test was never recommended, the clinic only did standard STI testing. Anyhow, I am a bit of a hypochodriac by nature and since I have learned I have no STI's I'm become terrifed I've contracted HIV, The man I had sex with was 20, and from what I understand is not a drug user and does not have anal sex/sex with other men. However, I can't really say I know too much about his sexual history and I guess it's really irrelevant as anyone can have the virus. I've noticed recently I've had more canker sores than usual, although located on my tongue.. something I've never experience before although I was originally afraid those sores might be a form of herpes and I think that could still remain a possibility?I've also had a bit of a stuffy nose for about a week, no fever no other symptoms..just a bit of phlegm that doesn't seem to want to go away. I also woke up with a bit of a nose bleed about a week ago but I was crying heavily the night before.. not sure if it could be related to that.  I know symptoms are not necessarily indicative of anything... but during the sex the man did not ejaculate inside of me, I know that.. so I'm not sure if that possibly puts me at a slightly lower risk? Either way, it's been just over 2 months since the unprotected sex and I know I need to get tested but I'm completely terrifed of doing so. It's getting harder and harder for me to function everyday as the paranoia is constantly on my mind, even when I'm in school and with friends or family.  Would results be accurate if I took them now? And how dire does my situation look? :(
I can't believe I allowed myself to be so careless...I've never done anything like this before.. this was only my second partner and I feel so stupid and ashamed of myself for not being smart enough or thinking of the consequences. I was just so naive and for me, always thought of condoms as being to prevent pregnany...because STI's didn't even seem to be a reality to me. I just felt that if I had any sort of STI I wouldn't ever have unprotected sex and the risk of causing this much turmoil to someone.. :(

Offline dumbblonde

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Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #1 on: September 06, 2007, 10:31:31 PM »
I just thought I should add I;ve had problems with iron defiency in the past and have not been taking my pills lately as diligently as I should have.. so that may relate to the phlegm I've been experiencing.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #2 on: September 06, 2007, 10:46:35 PM »
OK, the bottom line is that you had unprotected intercourse which means you should take an HIV test. The CDC recommends doing that at 13 weeks past the most recent unprotected incident. That was certainly a lapse on the part of the facility you went to that they didn't tell you that. It's basic.

To give you some comfort, there is absolutely nothing you are reporting in the way of symptoms which is in any way HIV specific. But then you need to know for future reference that neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms will ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status. Only an HIV test can give you that answer.

Also for the future, it doesn't matter how Right a Mr. seems to be or how great he looks or what you think you know about his history. Until you may find yourself in a securely monogamous relationship in which both partners test negative together, until such time anytime you have intercourse the guy has to wear a condom. NO EXCEPTIONS. Period.

So get yourself test and collect what hopefully is going to be a negative result. As far as your symptoms are concerned, that's something to discuss with your doctor. Given what you have described of the incident, I'd say odds are you are going to test negative.

Good luck and keep us posted.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline dumbblonde

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Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #3 on: September 07, 2007, 01:45:26 PM »
Well it's just been two months since the incident so I guess I've got another month of waiting and paranoia. Thank you for your input though. The test is a blood test, am I right? I thought it was very strange when I was getting tested they mentioned nothing about HIV. And when I brought it up they simply told me I would need to book a seperate test, did not recomend it or even explain it to me. It seems their main concern is preventing teen pregnancy... rather than raising awareness and explaining risks to teens.. perhaps explaining how we've been so careless.

Offline Ann

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Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #4 on: September 07, 2007, 01:54:07 PM »
Dumb,

Sometimes it's a blood test, sometimes it's a mouth swab. It all depends on what your clinic uses so you'll have to ask them.

You might want to think about also asking them why they aren't being more proactive when it comes to hiv education. It should be part and parcel of what they do.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline dumbblonde

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Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #5 on: September 08, 2007, 08:11:26 PM »
I have little red bumps that itch a bit on the top of my vagina..not the inside.. but the outside? like where the hair grows? would that be considered a symptom related to hiv.. ie like a rash? do you think i could get tested within the next two weeks even though the 3 month mark hasn't passed because i am seriously making myself sick about this and i need to get something done.
i know i tested negative for all standard sti's.. not including hiv.. but i feel like something is not right in that area and i'm not sure where to go anymore after the clinic dismissed me so quickly..

Offline Ann

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Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #6 on: September 08, 2007, 08:54:18 PM »
Dumb,

The bumps around your vagina have nothing to do with hiv but it could be another sexually transmitted infection like herpes. We can not possibly diagnose it for you here, you'll have to show a doctor. If you're not happy with the clinic you went to, try your usual GP.

You should not test any sooner than six weeks. The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six week, but a six week negative result MUST be confirmed at three months.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline dumbblonde

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Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #7 on: September 08, 2007, 09:09:22 PM »
I teste negative for herpes apparently.. so I'm not sure.. maybe crabs? This is all so confusing to me and I'm not sure whether or not I'm looking for problems that aren't there and making this harder on myself or whether I'm just being realistic. I broke down cying today when I read the forums and I literally thought to myself, "I have to be positive, there is no way I'm not." But then I flip to the other side minutes later, thinking "It can't be." Thank you again for your response though. I will let you all know what happens at the six week mark.

Offline Ann

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Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #8 on: September 09, 2007, 06:00:26 AM »
dumb,

The best way to diagnose herpes is to have a doctor look at the outbreak and possibly take a swab from the site. The blood tests for herpes aren't terribly reliable. Whatever the cause of the bumps, you need to have a doctor take a look.

Good luck with the hiv test.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline dumbblonde

  • Member
  • Posts: 8
Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #9 on: September 12, 2007, 10:42:40 PM »
Helllooo.. I'm back again, but fortunately more calm this time. I have booked an HIV test in about 3 weeks. However one final question; the clinic offers two testing methods. One is the rapid test and the other I'm not sure which one it is, I'm assuming it's just the standard HIV test though. Which would you recommend? I'm not sure how I feel about having the results right away.. part of me wants it but the other part is still terrified.. and I've heard of false positives with the 60 second test? Your advice would be greatly appreciated..

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #10 on: September 13, 2007, 05:43:35 AM »
dumb,

It's totally up to you which test you take. Why don't you ask at the clinic which they recommend.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline dumbblonde

  • Member
  • Posts: 8
Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #11 on: September 13, 2007, 08:04:04 PM »
I'm just asking as I had heard questions from others and the rapid test involving false positives? But yes, I will do that as well.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #12 on: September 14, 2007, 04:12:30 AM »
dumb,

ANY hiv test can return a false positive. They're relatively rare, given the amount of testing done on any given day around the world. The possibility of getting a false positive is why there are proceedures in place to rule these out. If you want to know more about testing, follow the Testing Lesson link found in the Welcome Thread, which you should have read by now.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline dumbblonde

  • Member
  • Posts: 8
Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #13 on: October 03, 2007, 07:11:38 PM »
I went for my test today. I did the rapid test, it came back negative. So... I'm in the clear? I've been so convinced I HAD the virus now that I heard I don't it's almost hard for me to process that and to let go of the fear. I'm relieved though..
Thank you to everyone who replied to my thread.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #14 on: October 03, 2007, 07:29:08 PM »
Blonde,

It's quite normal for people who've convinced themselves they would test positive to have some difficulty accepting a conclusive negative result. Don't fret, you will be able to let go of that fear.

You are HIV negative, and that's excellent news. Congratulations! Remember practice safer-sex all the time and you won't have to go through this sort of stress in the future.

MtD

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Completely Terrified
« Reply #15 on: October 04, 2007, 09:49:50 AM »
Hi,

Just want to chime in on what Matty has said. It can almost feel unreal or anti-climactic to test negative after so much upset. But YES, happily you are HIV negative. Period. End of story.

And also as he said, remember for the future that the guy has to be wearing a condom everytime, no exceptions no matter what.

Good luck to you.
Andy Velez

 


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