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Author Topic: Condom broke with sex worker  (Read 8578 times)

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Offline eddiewayshoo

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Condom broke with sex worker
« on: September 03, 2007, 06:35:09 AM »
Hi There

I went and saw a Korean sex worker today.

After I withdrew I noticed the condom was not on me. She pulled it out of herself and it was broken quite badly.

So now I am here and full of anxiety. I have read the lessons and intend to test in 6 weeks and then 13 weeks, but boy, am I worried!!!

Question:
I am right in understanding that the odds are in my favor and my chances of testing negative are very very good?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #1 on: September 03, 2007, 06:52:23 AM »
Yes Eddie, your chances of testing positive as a result of this episode are very low. As you would know from our Lessons, HIV is a difficult virus to transmit especially from female to male.

Nevertheless "low chance" is not "no chance" and since HIV is nothing to guess about you do need to test at the 12-13 week mark. You can also test at 6 weeks should you wish to, but a definitive negative result can't be determined until week 13.

You should also ask for a full STD screen as there are other STDs which are more prevalent and transmissible than HIV.

Also please understand that the sex worker's race is irrelevant with regards to HIV status.

Regards,

MtD

/edited for a typo/
« Last Edit: September 03, 2007, 10:20:09 AM by matty.the.damned »

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #2 on: September 03, 2007, 08:59:54 PM »
Thanks for the reply MtD

I'll sit my time and try not to let my mind play games. I am anticipating a negative result but with the understanding the my behaviour was at risk.

I also agree with you that it is the behaviour and not the people that define transmission. Unfortantely this is one the scores next to behaviour.

I like Korean WL; the only problem I encountered was after the breakage I attempted to get her testing history and that was a bit hard due to langauge issues.

thanks again

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #3 on: September 03, 2007, 09:19:45 PM »
Eddie, no matter what her testing history was/is, you'd still need to get tested. Anytime you have had a risk your own test is the only sure way to reliably know your HIV status.

Given this was a single incident during which you were "covered' at least a part of the time and weighing in that it's harder to transmit from female to male, I expect you will test negative. Make sure you are using condoms that fit you properly.

Good luck to you on your test!

Cheers, 
Andy Velez

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #4 on: September 17, 2007, 08:12:56 AM »
Thanks

I know what you say is true Andy.

I'm in the bad zone, I'm seeing symptoms as I have been unwell for the last couple of days. Damn, I am so prone to this sort of crap.

They should put a definition for worry-well in the dictionary and stick my picture next to it.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #5 on: September 17, 2007, 08:19:42 AM »
You'd have lots of company with that photo in the dictionary.

Your symptoms mean zilch in terms of being a reliable way of knowing about one's HIV status. If they persist you should discuss them with your doctor.

Given this was a single incident and that you were protected until the condom broke, the odds are in your favor that you'll test negative. HIV is not easy to transmit and it's significantly more difficult to accomplish from female to male.

Stay productively busy and the waiting time will pass more quickly than you can imagine. You will have less time to develop and to search out symptoms too.

Keep us posted on your test results.

Oh yes, and make sure you are using latex condoms which fit you properly.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #6 on: September 22, 2007, 11:40:09 PM »
I'm not just going to go away am I.

Sorry to be a pain but there is some stuff in my head that is not leaving me alone.

I have a question.

At the time of the incident I was aware of PEP and that I had to get in quickly if i was going to take it.

I opted not to do this as I felt I was not a suitable candidate for PEP. My understanding was that a person who is suitable to take PEP had a real and demonstrable at-risk situation and that I simply did not qualify.

Was my reasoning correct at the time? Would a responsible doctor have had prescribed me PEP in the scenario that I outlined in this post?

The truth of the matter is that I am now scared sh&*less.

I have tried not list symptoms as I know this can not be used to diagnose anything over the Internet. Sorry to cause you to re-iterate it again for the 10,000th time.

For the last 7 days I have been running a low grade fever and in the last few days my lymph nodes are popping out the side of my neck. The groin lymph nodes are aching.  My muscles have been aching. It is 1 day short of three weeks. Right in the period that you would expect ARS. I know that poking lymph nodes can cause them to swell so I have not done this.

I have gone back to smoking and drinking a bottle of wine a day. Could this cause my lymph nodes to swell?

Thanks

Eddie

(Edited to fix typo and add paranoia)
« Last Edit: September 23, 2007, 12:14:10 AM by eddiewayshoo »

Offline Ann

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #7 on: September 23, 2007, 06:10:50 AM »
eddie,

Your reasoning is correct - you weren't a suitable candidate for PEP and no responsible doctor would have prescribed it for you over your incident. The risk simply wasn't high enough to warrant taking toxic medications for a whole month.

You can talk about your symptoms until we're all blue in the face, but that doesn't mean they mean anything when it comes to hiv - they don't. All sorts of things cause lymph glands to swell - INCLUDING touching them all the time to check whether they're swollen or not. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy when you prod them all the time. Keep your hands off them and show them to a doctor.

Excess smoking and drinking can make you feel like crap. Knock it off if you're doing it because of this scare - there's no need to turn yourself into an alcoholic over it.

I've yet to see the insertive partner (that's you) end up hiv positive after a single condom break - and I don't expect you to be the first in the history of these forums to do so. (the forums have been running since the year 2000)

Keep yourself productively busy - and I don't mean by drinking wine - and the time will go much faster. I'm expecting a negative result and so should you.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #8 on: September 23, 2007, 06:51:04 PM »
OK, thanks

I will keep your collective advice in mind.

Your efforts are appreciated.

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #9 on: September 24, 2007, 06:52:36 AM »
Ok, I managed to do a few things today.

1) I dropped by the local STD clinic and registered myself. In the interview I was told that I would be really unlucky to have contracted HIV in the described scenario (like you guys have also said). I have a much higher chance of hiding chlamydia down there. They booked me in for a panel of tests on Thursday. I was told to go and see a GP for my lymph nodes.

2) Went to GP this evening. Was told that my Thyroid is inflamed, not my lymph nodes as far as he could see (I knew it was not my imagination). He said it was a general flu like symptom caused by a virus. (Now that had me thinking as I have read way too many accounts of mis-diagnosed ARS). However, I'm going to do my best to play it cool but this still does not explain other things I am experiencing. He acknowledge the inflamed throat also. My groin lymph nodes still ache like hell, but then, I acknowledge it could be something else.

Don't get me wrong, the doctor is no fool, if he said it's my thyroid and not my lymph nodes, I believe him.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #10 on: September 24, 2007, 08:55:01 AM »
Just as a general thing, Eddie, to recap: HIV is NOT an easy virus to transmit. It's significantly harder to accomplish from female to male. The condom protected you until it broke. So in a single incident in which you were partly protected and in which you don't even know for sure the woman is HIV+, I would say the odds are very much in your favor that you're going to test negative.

None of your symptoms are in any way HIV-specific. Keep breathing, get on with your life and ultimately I expect you will test negative.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #11 on: September 29, 2007, 07:55:02 PM »
I'm back.

A reply to this post is not necessary as you guys have said it all and I have heard what you said. For instance Ann says she has not seen one transmission through an incidence like this in the history of the board. You all expect a negative result and symptoms mean nothing.

I just want to make a record that I can review later in which I can match dates and hopefully learn a meaningful lesson.

OK, I went back to the doctor to collect my results for the general illness I am experiencing. He had changed his opinion based on the results.

My WBC is high and I am suffering a general infection. He checked my neck again and says it is definitely lymph nodes. He pressed them and they are really sore. I asked him if it was viral or bacterial. He believes it is bacterial due to the tenderness.

I am now two days on a penicillin based antibiotic. I will be expecting my infection to start clearing tomorrow if it is indeed a bacterial based infection.

The lymph nodes that are tender are neck,groin and armpit. I am also suspicious that there are lymph nodes just in front of the elbow.

This has been going on for two weeks now. Perversely, the longer it draws out the better I feel about it as I understand ARS is a short term illness.

I need to delay my HIV antibody test till mid November as we are working on a critical project at work and if I was to receive a positive result I would break down.

Just on a side note. I went to my appointment at the STD clinic on Thursday. The urethral swab was inspected under a microscope and no sign of inflammation was found. The other tests will be in about 2 weeks. I declined a HIV test for the reasons I stated above. The doctor felt if I was undergoing ARS, then I would most likely test positive. I know that delaying and feeding fear is a bad thing, but I also know how I would respond to a positive result and this is a really bad time.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #12 on: September 30, 2007, 08:58:36 AM »
Test whenever you choose to. Odds are you're going to test negative.

Good luck. 
Andy Velez

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #13 on: October 02, 2007, 07:58:59 AM »
Yes, you are right.

I think I need to stop panicking and stop convincing myself I have HIV. It's amazing how things manifest into reality with a concentrated and a powerful thought (my frigging lymph nodes are swelling and I got a doctor to confirm it!!!). I wish I could do that positively.

I'll go away and post my results in the due time. Thanks for the patience. Keep the good work up; some of us appreciate it!!

Cheers

(edited for typo)
« Last Edit: October 02, 2007, 08:07:21 AM by eddiewayshoo »

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #14 on: October 06, 2007, 08:26:21 AM »
The general STD tests came back negative, as I suspected they would.

However, I have been suffering a general lymphadenopathy. It's everywhere, neck, under chin, groin, armpits. This is really scaring me. Really it is.

The lymphadenopathy is not imagined, it is really happening.

Finding this in the "am I infected posts" is only confirming my suspicions

Quote
As you mention, transient lymphadenopathy is common. If you've gone through a symptomatic seroconversion illness with lymphadenopathy, the kind you get is persistent and generalised (which means two or more sites outside of your axillae/armpits). That's what set alarm bells ringing with me - my LNs came up and stayed up in my groin, neck, armpits - so I went and got tested.

From:

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=8285.msg98542#msg98542

I've got no idea why I'm posting this. There's nothing anyone can do but I believe I'm going to make forum history as the first person to become HIV positive as an insertive partner from a single condom failure.

This really sucks.

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #15 on: October 06, 2007, 08:32:02 AM »
eddie,

See your doctor about your lymph nodes - it could be anything.

I'm still fully expecting you to test negative. You'll be able to have a six week test soon, and in the meantime you're just going to have to keep yourself productively busy. Reading about hiv - including on this website - does not qualify as keeping busy. Get off your computer and go get some fresh air and exercise and you'll feel a whole lot better physically and mentally.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #16 on: October 07, 2007, 02:10:05 AM »
My head hears you but I can't lay off because my body is reminding me every waking minute of the day.

I went to the medical centre today but being Sunday there is a two hour wait. I already know what they are going to say; it's caused by a virus and you will get over it. I'd have to go back a few times before someone will start to dig deeper. I've been healthy most my life and have not found a good primary care physician. But I will try again latter.

What I've read about lymphadenopathy; there are not too many causes. In a sick way, a part of me would be relieved with a cancer diagnosis. At least I would be able to look people in the face and tell them what is going on with me. Unfortunately, the timing is way to coincidental for me to draw conclusions other than ARS at this point.

I've always been careful and have practiced safe sex. My definition of safe sex is the same to what you guys say. Bareback blow jobs are OK, but always cover for vaginal penetration. No exceptions.

I really hope my debauched lifestyle has not caught up with me.

Blow waiting, I'm going to take the 6 week test and see what may come. This is the worst possible time to have this complication in my life, but hey, when is a good time to confront stuff like this.

Despite all you have said, I really have a bad feeling about this.
« Last Edit: October 07, 2007, 02:29:13 AM by eddiewayshoo »

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #17 on: October 07, 2007, 10:03:11 AM »
A "bad feeling" about this? Fortunately feelings aren't facts. And I suspect your bad feelings are about your own judgement of yourself that you've been "a bad boy." That's what comes across in your various entries.

Cut out the frabberjabber and get yourself test for HIV and collect what I expect will be a negative result.

Awaitng your result,
Andy Velez

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #18 on: October 12, 2007, 06:14:06 AM »
No doubts you are correct about my assumptions of myself. However, I would not peak like this if no physical issues were occurring. Way too coincidental. Those pesky lymph nodes are refusing to subside.

Booked in for test for the 25/10/07. Will post result.

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #19 on: October 14, 2007, 08:38:20 PM »
I have a question.

It is not related to this incident as I have disclosed all to get the best possible advice. Besides, I think I have tested your patience enough and any further conversation will just go around in circles until I produce a result.

The question is:

How much of a risk is dipping? That is, if the head of the penis penetrates (no further) into the vagina very briefly? For under 10 seconds.

(Edited for two typos)
« Last Edit: October 15, 2007, 04:48:42 AM by eddiewayshoo »

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #20 on: October 14, 2007, 08:40:46 PM »
Dipping per se is not a risk for HIV transmission in itself. The real problem with unprotected dipping is that it leads invariably to unprotected fucking.

Unprotected dipping is, however, a real risk for the transmission of other more common and transmissible STD's.

MtD

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #21 on: October 14, 2007, 09:02:49 PM »
Thanks for the detailed response MtD.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #22 on: October 14, 2007, 09:04:04 PM »
You're quite welcome Eddie.

MtD

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #23 on: October 15, 2007, 06:26:23 AM »
I have now moved my test out to after the 3/11/07. This way I will be clear of this project at work which is the most major work we have done in three years.

I need to so this as I now so effing scared of a positive result that I can't function any more. I no my chances are low as you have told me a dozen times but my lymph nodes have gotten really bad. Last night they woke me up a few times with the pain.

Seriously, I have not been this spooked ever and I am preparing myself for a positive diagnosis. I can't apologize enough for burdening you with this crap but I have absolutely no one I can talk to about it. I also understand that it flies in the face on what you do here; a risk assessment, and that's all.
« Last Edit: October 15, 2007, 06:30:02 AM by eddiewayshoo »

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #24 on: October 15, 2007, 07:56:49 AM »
I don't have anything new to say to you. Lumps and bumps notwithstanding, when you finally get around to getting tested I still expect your result will be negative.

Your painful lymph nodes are something for you to discuss with your doctor.
Andy Velez

Offline eddiewayshoo

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #25 on: November 08, 2007, 02:45:09 AM »
Yes you are correct Andy, feelings are not facts.

I received results today and the test came back negative.

Clearly I blew everthing totally out of proportion.

At the testing centre I went to, they are using a new generation of tests and 6 weeks is considered conclusive. I tested 8 weeks after.

Interesting how symptoms manifest without an actual infection.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Condom broke with sex worker
« Reply #26 on: November 08, 2007, 02:50:26 AM »
Matty the Damned will resist the urge to do the "Told-You-So" dance here, Eddie. ;)

Congratulations on a happy outcome.

Best wishes,

MtD

 


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