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I HAVE AIDS DIAGNOSIS FOR FIRST TIME IN 13 YEARS AND I FEEL SCARED

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stevie:
I have recently found out that my t cells have dropped below 200 and do not like the way i feel.

I went on Bactrim, was allergic, now I am on Dapsone.

I have been on a drug holiday since last year due to liver problems.  I will start anti virals again by the end of the month.

My viral load is 99000, my T-cells are 145.

I feel tired and a bit depressed.  I worry about my mortality. I worry that perhaps I am on the second half of this journey, could I actually be getting sick in the near future?

I am scared to let friends know what is going on with me, because I don't want people talking about me behind my back.

What do I do to become more accepting of my disease and less afraid of what people think.

I want to come out of my AIDS closet in a way that I can get support, not uncomfortable reactions from others.

Any suggestions?

Thanks,
Stevie

DanielMark:
Hi Stevie,

Your fears are natural, only donít let them be set in stone. Things can still improve.

In 2002 with a VL more than 500,000 and very few CD4 cells, I was also classified as having AIDS. It took a couple of years of adherence to meds and surgery for an OI but my numbers vastly improved and although I am still on file as having AIDS I consider myself to have rebounded from that diagnosis.

Never give in and never give up!

Daniel

PS: your true friends will give you the best support. The rest aren't worth bothering about..

ubotts:
HI There,

This is a great place to be and to find answers and comfort.

I myself have been diagnosed with full blown aids because my numbers
went below 200...but i looked the same..Maybe felt a bit tired, but
that's normal..

Eventually your numbers will go back up and back down..

Don't get caught up in numbers, because they will fluctuate constantly..
I was on Bactrim as well, and I got sick as a dog.

Now on my folder it says...IN BIG Letters..Allergic to Bactrim..

About coming out to others was hard for me as well..All of my family knows
and only a few of my good friends know..

Maybe ill never be 100% out of the closet with hiv...But at least some know..

You have to use you senses and feel around of who you can tell and who you
cant..
At least that's what i did..
Just finding out is scary enough...

Work at one thing at a time.....try not to let it overwhelm you..
I hope this helps....... ;)

J.R.E.:
Hello Stevie,

I looked back at your other post. You apparently were on Viramune and combivir. Has there been any suggestion to you as to your new regimen? Did the doctor suggests any resistance tests prior to starting on the new regimen ?
I had my Aids diagnosis in 2003, with 16 t-cells and a 500,000 viral load. I am sure things will work out for you.


Hang in there----------Ray

chefrusty904:

--- Quote from: stevie on September 02, 2007, 05:31:11 PM ---I have recently found out that my t cells have dropped below 200 and do not like the way i feel.

I went on Bactrim, was allergic, now I am on Dapsone.

I have been on a drug holiday since last year due to liver problems.  I will start anti virals again by the end of the month.

My viral load is 99000, my T-cells are 145.

I feel tired and a bit depressed.  I worry about my mortality. I worry that perhaps I am on the second half of this journey, could I actually be getting sick in the near future?

I am scared to let friends know what is going on with me, because I don't want people talking about me behind my back.

What do I do to become more accepting of my disease and less afraid of what people think.

I want to come out of my AIDS closet in a way that I can get support, not uncomfortable reactions from others.

Any suggestions?

Thanks,
Stevie

--- End quote ---

--- Quote from: stevie on September 02, 2007, 05:31:11 PM ---I have recently found out that my t cells have dropped below 200 and do not like the way i feel.

I went on Bactrim, was allergic, now I am on Dapsone.

I have been on a drug holiday since last year due to liver problems.  I will start anti virals again by the end of the month.

My viral load is 99000, my T-cells are 145.

I feel tired and a bit depressed.  I worry about my mortality. I worry that perhaps I am on the second half of this journey, could I actually be getting sick in the near future?

I am scared to let friends know what is going on with me, because I don't want people talking about me behind my back.

What do I do to become more accepting of my disease and less afraid of what people think.

I want to come out of my AIDS closet in a way that I can get support, not uncomfortable reactions from others.

Any suggestions?

Thanks,
Stevie

--- End quote ---
Stevie, I have just made a tremendous increase in my cd-4 count. 150 to 480 and a decrease in vl to 1500 copies I am not taking any meds right now but am keepinr the option open.
my overall health has increased dramatically
I am a recovering addict and something as simple as not injesting any harmful chemicals has given me almost immediate health benifits

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