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Author Topic: Receptive Oral Sex  (Read 6433 times)

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Offline Frequency

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Receptive Oral Sex
« on: August 24, 2007, 12:30:39 PM »
Thank you all in advance for your kindness to those of us with concerns.

I had an encounter yesterday at a massage parlor.  I performed unprotected oral sex on the the masseur for about 2 minutes.  I took his penis very deep into my mouth during this time.  Although he did not ejaculate in my mouth, I did notice the presence of a little pre-cum as I was pleasuring him.  Prior to ejaculation, he pulled his penis out of my mouth and masturbated until he ejaculated onto my chest.  He then used his sperm to masturbate me to orgasm. 

I am concerned about my possible exposure to HIV.  I do not know his status.

I apologize for the somewhat graphic nature of this post. 

Do I need to test over this incident? 

Thank you so much.

Online RapidRod

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #1 on: August 24, 2007, 12:45:52 PM »
No, you do not need to test over this.

Offline Frequency

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #2 on: September 08, 2007, 05:57:04 AM »
Rapidrod, thank you so much for your kind response.  If I may indulge your patience and the patience of the other kind members of this forum with another question concerning the oral sex episode.

Would your response be any different if, after the man had ejaculated outside my mouth, I again took the head of his penis, which was covered with some residual sperm, into my mouth for several more seconds.  After noticing that some of the sperm on the head of his penis had come into contact with my tongue, I quickly removed my mouth from his penis and spat out the small amount of sperm on my tongue.  I am not sure if relevant, but my oral health is excellent.

I am wondering if this new information would change your earlier response in any way.  Again, I do apologize if this question exposes my ignorance about these matters.

With warm regards,
Frequency
« Last Edit: September 08, 2007, 07:02:35 AM by Frequency »

Online RapidRod

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #3 on: September 08, 2007, 07:02:22 AM »
No, it would not change anything. Just make sure you use condoms consistently with plenty of water base lube for anal or vaginal sex and you keep yourself protected.

Offline Frequency

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #4 on: September 08, 2007, 07:04:43 AM »
Thank you so much, Rapidrod, for you quick and reassuring response.  I shall now let go of my residual fears regarding my possible HIV risk for this episode.

With warm regards,
Frequency

Offline Frequency

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #5 on: September 07, 2008, 10:22:41 AM »
I apologize in advance for the graphic nature of the following post.

Today I had a similar episode to the one from August 2007 (see above).  I performed oral sex on a male masseur of unknown HIV status.  He ejaculated in my mouth but I did not swallow his ejaculate.  Given the nature of the responses to my previous encounter, I do not feel overly concerned nor do I feel the need to be tested in 12 weeks time.  The only difference this time is that instead of taking pre-ejaculatory fluid into my mouth as I did in the August 2007 encounter, this time I took ejaculate into my mouth (not just a little, mind you, but the entire orgasm worth). 

However, I just wanted to confirm that the thinking on oral sex as a transmission vector for HIV has not changed in the last 12 months and that I do not need to test over this incident.

For information purpose, my oral health is excellent.

Warm regards,
Frequency

Online RapidRod

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #6 on: September 07, 2008, 11:22:31 AM »
Correct..

Offline Frequency

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #7 on: September 07, 2008, 12:08:02 PM »
Thank you, Rapidrod, for your very concise response.  I am most grateful.

Warm regards,
Frequency

Offline Frequency

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Insertive Anal Sex - Condom Broke
« Reply #8 on: August 22, 2010, 08:55:41 AM »
I hope that everyone is well.

I am a male recently had anal sex with another male of unknown status.  I was the insertive partner and I wore a condom (as I always do).  When I pulled out after ejaculating the condom was gone, or at least that is what I thought at first. After searching for a while, it appears that it had broken at the top at some juncture during sex and was wound around the base of my penis.  I don't know at what point it broke as I did not feel anything.  I do not have any sexually transmitted diseases, nor do I have any cuts or abrasions on my penis.  I get tested for HIV and sexually transmitted diseases once a year.  My last test, all clear, was in July 2010.

I understand that there is a risk of infection when having anal intercourse without a condom.  I did use a condom but it broke and I don't know when it broke.  What is my risk profile in this situation?  Are there any documented cases of infection in similar circumstances?

Many thanks for your kind responses.
« Last Edit: August 22, 2010, 09:16:15 AM by Frequency »

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #9 on: August 22, 2010, 09:20:43 AM »
I've merged your threads here. Please follow our rule and in the future keep all of your entries in this same thread. Thanks for your cooperation.

If by "at the top" you mean the condom broke around the head of your penis then there was risk in this incident. Until the condom broke you were protected. The risk for transmission in this kind of circumstance is fairly low but just to be prudent you do need to get tested. You can get a final result at 13 weeks past the incident.

Also, make sure you are using condoms that fit you properly and that you are always using a water-based lube.

My expectation is that you will test negative. Good luck with your test.  
Andy Velez

Offline Frequency

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #10 on: August 22, 2010, 09:27:30 AM »
Thank you, Andy, for your response and for merging my threads.  

I assume the condom broke at the head of my penis because when I pulled out my penis was not covered with the condom.  But it may have split elsewhere - for example, it may have split at the bottom and then slid off my penis as I pulled out.  I just don't know.  At first I thought that it had come off completely and was still inside my partner.  However, I then noticed that the part that wraps tightly around the penis at the base was still there at the base and the rest was attached to the rubber ring part but no longer covering the head of my penis or the shaft.

Would your answer be different had it broken at the bottom and then slipped off my penis as I pulled out?

I any event, it is useless guessing as I can't be sure.  I best get a test at 13 weeks and just pray in the meantime that the result will be negative.
« Last Edit: August 22, 2010, 10:13:36 AM by Frequency »

Offline Frequency

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #11 on: August 23, 2010, 07:50:51 AM »
This "condom breakage" episode happened yesterday.  Should I consider PEP or does this situation not really warrant it?

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #12 on: August 23, 2010, 08:49:15 AM »
The condom protected you until it broke. This was a single incident of a possible exposure. Odds are you are ok this time. HIV is not easily transmitted and the risk is significantly lower for the insertive partner. But you have to decide whether you want to do PEP or not. I suggest you discuss it with your doctor.

I've never known of a confirmed case of transmission when a condom has broken. But you need to decide what you're comfortable with deciding.
Andy Velez

Offline Frequency

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #13 on: August 23, 2010, 12:25:39 PM »
Thanks, Andy.  As the risk is low then I will not consider PEP.  i will simply get tested at 13 weeks and collect what I expect to be a negative result.  Thank you for your kind responses.

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #14 on: August 23, 2010, 12:45:02 PM »
OK. And keep busy with other things during your waiting period. You will find that helps the time to pass more easily than you may imagine is possible.

Keep us posted on your result. Good luck.
Andy Velez

Offline Frequency

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #15 on: August 23, 2010, 02:13:58 PM »
Will do.  I'm not one to fret over things I cannot change.  I am likely to forget so I put a reminder in my iPhone for 13 weeks so I remember to get the test.  I will be sure to come back and inform you of my negative result.

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #16 on: August 23, 2010, 03:04:47 PM »
Sounds good. Will be awaiting good news from you.

Cheers.
Andy Velez

Offline Frequency

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #17 on: October 08, 2010, 02:52:01 AM »
I tested negative yesterday at the seven week mark.   Given this, what are the chances that I would test positive at week 13?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #18 on: October 08, 2010, 04:45:48 AM »
I tested negative yesterday at the seven week mark.   Given this, what are the chances that I would test positive at week 13?

Very, very low. You will almost certainly test negative at 13 weeks. But test again to confirm this negative result.

MtD

Offline Frequency

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Protected Anal + Unprotected Oral
« Reply #19 on: May 11, 2012, 08:44:39 AM »
I am seeking a confirmation, partly out of guilt.  I have been frequenting gay sex clubs once or twice a week for the past 12 months or so and have had two to three different sexual partners per week.   When I have insertive anal sex I always use a condom with lots of lube and have not had a breakage.  I also have frequent receptive and insertive oral - always unprotected.  I never have receptive anal sex.

I have regular STI checks and have always received negative results.

Lately, I have been reading that condoms are not 100% effective for insertive anal and I am starting to wonder whether I need to get tested - given the fact that I have had numerous acts of protected anal intercourse with partners of unknown status over the art 12 months. 

Or am I correct in thinking that I do not need to test for HIV because my anal is always protected?

Many thanks for the confirmation and thanks to all of you here for your kind support and assistance.
« Last Edit: May 11, 2012, 08:47:05 AM by Frequency »

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #20 on: May 11, 2012, 08:50:00 AM »
Nothing but sex with your own hand is 100% safe. But we know from long experience in the epidemic that condoms properly used provide very effective protection.

For anyone who is sexually active it's always a good idea to regularly have a full STD panel done because other STDs are much easier to acquire than HIV. So it's good to read that you are doing that.

Keep using those condoms everytime for anal intercourse. They do the job although if you are looking for 100% assurance, no one in good faith can give you that guarantee. .
 
Andy Velez

Offline Frequency

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #21 on: May 11, 2012, 08:54:31 AM »
Nothing but sex with your own hand is 100% safe. But we know from long experience in the epidemic that condoms properly used provide very effective protection.

For anyone who is sexually active it's always a good idea to regularly have a full STD panel done because other STDs are much easier to acquire than HIV. So it's good to read that you are doing that.

Keep using those condoms everytime for anal intercourse. They do the job although if you are looking for 100% assurance, no one in good faith can give you that guarantee. .

Wow.  So you can get HIV even if you use condoms that do not break?  That freaks me out.   I did not know that. 

If I had known that I would not have been doing what I have been doing.  So, basically you are saying I should test for HIV even though I have been properly using condoms and lubricant for insertive anal intercourse?

I guess I need to stop having anal sex.  If I can get HIV even if I use condoms then I am not willing to take that risk. 

Many thanks for your reply, Andy.  I'm quite stunned at my ignorance.  I thought that by using condoms I was good to go - i.e. safe.  That is clearly not the case.  Wow.
« Last Edit: May 11, 2012, 09:04:23 AM by Frequency »

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #22 on: May 11, 2012, 09:04:18 AM »
You are SAFER by using condoms. So if you do have anal sex, make sure to use them everytime. They provide very effective protection.
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #23 on: May 11, 2012, 09:05:11 AM »
Freq,

Condoms have been proven to prevent hiv infection. There have been three long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one.

While you don't need to test for hiv specifically over your activities, the responsible thing to do is to get tested at least once a year regardless. Have you not been offered hiv testing when you have those regular STI checks?

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Frequency

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #24 on: May 11, 2012, 09:09:00 AM »
You are SAFER by using condoms. So if you do have anal sex, make sure to use them everytime. They provide very effective protection.

I thought that I was SAFE by using condoms.  But SAFER is not SAFE.  Knowing that I might contract HIV even though I have "protected" sex is a concern and involves a level of risk that I am not prepared to take. 

Why would anyone in their right mind have anal sex at all if they know they can contract HIV even if they use a condom? 

I am so shocked by this news.




Offline Frequency

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #25 on: May 11, 2012, 09:14:29 AM »
Freq,

Condoms have been proven to prevent hiv infection. There have been three long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one.

While you don't need to test for hiv specifically over your activities, the responsible thing to do is to get tested at least once a year regardless. Have you not been offered hiv testing when you have those regular STI checks?

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann

Thanks, Ann. 

Yes, I have been offered HIV testing when I do the STI tests but I do not do it because I always use condoms - without exception.

Your advice and Andy's differs in that you say "Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. But Andy is saying that you cannot avoid infection even if you use condoms - i.e. they make is SAFER but not SAFE.  Huge and scary difference.


Offline Ann

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #26 on: May 11, 2012, 09:26:26 AM »
Freq,

You're missing Andy's point - and mine too, I suppose.

A correctly used condom - one that does not break because it's being used correctly - WILL protect you against hiv infection.

However, sometimes condoms break. Even a correctly used condom will sometimes break, although it is quite rare. This is the reason why people will say that condoms are not 100% effective. They break occasionally.

The only 100% safe sex is with your own hand - and even then you might do yourself an injury if you go about it too vigorously. ;) That's why all other sex is called safer sex. If you're using condoms, that's about as safe as you can get when you're involving another person.

Don't be afraid of getting tested for hiv. You need to accurately know your hiv status. You've been using condoms so you can bet it will be negative, but as it stands right now, you do not know.

It's up to you - test or don't test. But wouldn't it be nice to have that confirmation of your negative hiv status?

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Online Andy Velez

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #27 on: May 11, 2012, 09:28:04 AM »
The overwhelming evidence for decades affirms that consistent use of condoms will provide very effective protection against HIV transmission.

Andy Velez

Offline Frequency

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #28 on: May 11, 2012, 09:47:33 AM »
Thanks to you both.  Perhaps I am focusing too much on the language used in your responses. 

Ann, you are more definite in your assurances that a correctly used condom that does not break WILL protect against HIV infection.

Andy, on the other hand, is more circumspect in his language - that correctly used condoms that do not break provide "very effective protection" against HIV transmission.

In any event, I thank you both for your kind responses. 

And, yes, Ann, I will get a test because I think I would like to know that I am negative. 

But you can bet your bottom dollar that I will stop having anal sex.  I know myself.  If I did have anal sex again this is what would happen -  During the act, I will be thinking that condoms are "very effective protection" and that the only safe sex is having a wank.  That will be enough to ruin the moment, for sure.   Oh well. 

It's off the the nunnery for me!
« Last Edit: May 11, 2012, 09:54:59 AM by Frequency »

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Receptive Oral Sex
« Reply #29 on: May 11, 2012, 02:47:18 PM »
I thought that I was SAFE by using condoms.  But SAFER is not SAFE.  Knowing that I might contract HIV even though I have "protected" sex is a concern and involves a level of risk that I am not prepared to take. 

Why would anyone in their right mind have anal sex at all if they know they can contract HIV even if they use a condom? 

I am so shocked by this news.





You are misreading the statistics and the responses. HIV can not pass through an intact condom. It's scientifically impossible.
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

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