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my son gets so discouraged

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motherinneed:
I just need to type this to some understanding ears...
When I see the saddness in my son's eyes and I heard the fear in his voice I feel so helpless. Yes I give him hugs and support  him the best I can.


He is trying so hard to put his life back together. I feel that he was let go of his job for other reasons than they said and it is not right. But he said it would be hard to prove and he wants to move on. Now he is finding it very hard to find another job with that black mark they put on his record. And he cannot take it off his resume as what will he say he was doing for the past few years? Do not expect that to be answered just venting.

He has his share of good days but when he is talking about his death or how when he goes to pick
up his medications at the pharmacy he feels people look at him and treat him as though he was not even a person. It makes me sad and angry.

Okay, now I feel better. Could n ot hold all the saddness inside anymore. Maybe this will help me not cry if I type it.
Thanks for being there to type too.

Dachshund:
If you are not doing so already may I respectfully suggest some face to face counseling. In the meantime try getting your son to join the forums...you might have to step back...no peeking ;D in order for him to feel comfortable discussing HIV. He shouldn't isolate (which many of us do) and just might benefit from the forums...we are a very supportive lot around here. Maybe you can suggest he just poke around the forums to get a new perspective.

Good luck,
Hal

Miss Philicia:
Hang in there Mom!  You're having some rough seas today and it's good for you to come here and write/share your thoughts... hopefully it will help clear the clouds a bit.  Hopefully the same clarity will show itself to your son.  Wishing you (and him) the best.

David

ps&edit:  I second Hal's good suggestions and hope your son comes here to join us.

Carolann:
Yes, this bug can make lots of us feel very self conscious, but that will get better in time. I think it would be great for your son to come here and get som insights, and hope. I am looking forward to learning about his story. He already seems to have an advantage with a caring mother like you.

Take care,

CA

motherinneed:
thank you all so much.. My son is not yet ready for the forum , it seems, as he said, he did go to the forum and when he read about side effects and Lipodystrophy and wasting he become more upset. He will go to the forum when he is able to handle it.

He will be moving back here with me so he will not be so alone. I think this is good but I kind of think he feels he built his life and was independent and now he is forced due to lose of job, income and car to be back with me.
I know he loves me but I also think that is hard to be back with one's mother when one has had a life and that life has been altered.  Just thinking out loud again as it helps me. 

I am so angry that I feel he was fired because he is gay. And that is not right. But it is his life and he does not want to pursue it.. he was told that it is hard to prove so he kind of gave up and he was dealing more with his diagnoses so the job issue became unimportant ...more thinking out loud. To type these things puts them into perspective for me too

thank you all..

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