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Author Topic: I had anal sex with someone positive  (Read 4925 times)

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Offline j7bvqb

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I had anal sex with someone positive
« on: August 18, 2006, 04:46:41 PM »
I hooked up with someone on Sunday.  He laid me down on his bed and gave me oral sex.  He then straddled me and starting masturbating both of us.  At one point he reached under and pushed my penis into his anus.  No condom.  It felt so good I didn't pull out for a few minutes.  There was no condom and after a couple of minutes I asked what his status was.  He tested positive a year ago and has not developed AIDS and is not on medication yet.  I have no sores on my penis, neither of us came.  I do have a hangnail that was bleeding a few days before this but no fresh wound.  What kind of risk did I just put myself into?

Offline Ann

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Re: I had anal sex with someone positive
« Reply #1 on: August 18, 2006, 05:28:01 PM »
j,

You definitely had a risk and you do need to test. The risk with anal intercourse is a bit less for the insertive partner, but you still took a risk.

You can test at six weeks for a good indication of your status, as the vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by that time. A negative result at six week MUST be confirmed at 12-13 weeks for a conclusive result.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Although the odds are in your favour of testing negative from a one time insertive encounter, you absolutely should not be taking chances like this. I can't help but wonder if you have had unprotected intercourse in the past when you've assumed your partner was negative. You need to assume ANYONE you are with is positive unless you have tested TOGETHER.

Try to stay productively busy while you wait for the appropriate time to test. Don't symptom hunt, because symptoms or the lack of symptoms mean nothing where hiv is concerned. Only the appropriate test at the appropriate time will reliably inform you of your hiv status.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread for more in-depth transmission and testing information.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline young-dude

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Re: I had anal sex with someone positive
« Reply #2 on: August 18, 2006, 05:28:44 PM »
hi there, you did not specify whether you "actually" entered him or if you were just rubbing against his anus, which is frottage and safe in terms of HIV. If you did enter him, something which he would certainly have noticed (ie a bit painful at first) and you would known too, then yuo would profit from the earlier advice given here by Ann et al on such cases. they have suggested that "deeping" which is what you would have done if you entered him however briefly, still carries risk worth testing over, although lower risk than actually fucking for a longer time if anything b/c duration of possible exposure was shorter. They still say that it merits testing.

You should never enter anyone's ass no matter how good it feels without condoms, unless yo are certain of their status, which as Ann says happens when you are in a comitted monogamous relationship with no outside play where both partners are neg. Many people still use condoms in monogamous relationships b/c as extra caution or if they are not certain of their partner's fidelity or their own ability to remain monogamous.\

i wish you well and hope all goes well. I would reccomend going for testing to a gay men's health clinic in your city. They might offer they quick tests, which are great because you know ur results within 10-15 mins, which saves you the worrying over and stressing over with the more traditional tests which take a bit longer for the results to come back.

Ann et al have said that as most people will develop the antibodies within 4-6 , a neg at that time would be good indication of ur status, but b/c you had insertive sex you should re-test at 13 weeks. unlikely that a neg at 6 weeks would change.

good luck, play safe
cheers,
young dude
good luck

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: I had anal sex with someone positive
« Reply #3 on: August 18, 2006, 05:45:08 PM »
Dude,

He DID say he entered him - "At one point he reached under and pushed my penis into his anus.  No condom.  It felt so good I didn't pull out for a few minutes."

You are not in any position to be giving advice on this website and I suggest you keep any further comments in your OWN thread. Thank you for your cooperation.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline j7bvqb

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  • Posts: 7
Re: I had anal sex with someone positive
« Reply #4 on: August 18, 2006, 05:47:22 PM »
Thanks for the straight up answer.  What I got from your advice is that there definitely was risk and that I should test.  Thanks also for the blurb about keeping my mind productive as I've already started looking for and found supposed "symptoms."  I think your straightforwardness has made my commitment to always using a condom stronger than ever.  I don't view your answer as a scare tactic but it definitely has "scared" me into always playing safe 100% of the time.  If I test negative I will consider myself very lucky and will use this one experience as firm promise to keep safe everytime with everyone.  Thanks again.  I was hoping you would say that there was next to no risk but time will tell.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: I had anal sex with someone positive
« Reply #5 on: August 18, 2006, 05:54:47 PM »
j,

Unprotected anal intercourse is at the top of the risk list. This is because of the delicate nature of the lining of the rectum - it is prone to damage during intercourse. Please, do NOT take this chance ever again. This is serious stuff!

As I said, the odds ARE in your favour from a one-time incident, but you're playing roulette with your health here.

Good luck on the testing and feel free to keep us posted, but forget about looking for symptoms. The body has a way of obliging the mind with the symptoms you worry about.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline j7bvqb

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  • Posts: 7
Re: I had anal sex with someone positive
« Reply #6 on: August 20, 2006, 07:25:00 AM »
I will test in 5 more weeks and post again to reveal the test results. 

Offline j7bvqb

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  • Posts: 7
Re: I had anal sex with someone positive
« Reply #7 on: September 21, 2006, 06:41:51 PM »
I had enough stress and anxiety and went and got tested today with the 20 minute test.  It came back non-reactive.  Wow.  What a relief.  I know that it is still too soon and that I need to test again but wow, what a relief.  It sure has strengthened my resolve about how what I will do in the future.  I'll post again when I test next. 

Offline j7bvqb

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Re: I had anal sex with someone positive
« Reply #8 on: November 12, 2006, 07:10:49 AM »
I did a test at home kit 4 days ago and received negative results 2 days ago.  Do I need follow up for the incident I first wrote about or do you think it's been long enough?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I had anal sex with someone positive
« Reply #9 on: November 12, 2006, 07:22:53 AM »
13 weeks past your last unprotected exposure is when you test.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: I had anal sex with someone positive
« Reply #10 on: November 12, 2006, 07:27:22 AM »
j,

From what you wrote in your first post, your incident occured on August 13th. That means November 5th was twelve weeks after this happened and you tested ... this past Wednesday?

You have tested a few days after twelve weeks and this means you are conclusively hiv negative. Please, please, protect your hiv negative status by making sure condoms are being used for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions. You were fortunate this time, but next time you may not be.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline j7bvqb

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: I had anal sex with someone positive
« Reply #11 on: November 12, 2006, 07:37:30 AM »
I agree.  I really dodged the bullet on this one.  This incident really scared me as this was the first time I have ever knowingly had sex with someone who is positive.  Of course, you never really know for sure who is positive.  Thanks for all your help.  I hope everyone who reads this post understands with as much power as I did and we take the precautions we know we should so we don't have to go through the months of anxiety that I have.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: I had anal sex with someone positive
« Reply #12 on: November 12, 2006, 07:43:48 AM »
j,

If you haven't already, make sure you read through the condom and lube links in my signature line. With a little imagination, condom use can be incorporated into your foreplay - they don't have to be a mood killer and can actually be fun if you shift your perspective a little. ;)

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline j7bvqb

  • Member
  • Posts: 7
Re: I had anal sex with someone positive
« Reply #13 on: July 06, 2007, 04:40:11 PM »
Just an update.  I tested again using the Orasure swab and it was negative.  Whew!

 


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