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Author Topic: Ok...now I'm really scared  (Read 2960 times)

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Offline Murphys Law

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Ok...now I'm really scared
« on: June 20, 2007, 06:49:34 PM »
Hello everybody,

I hope you all are doing well. I was here about a year ago with a broken condom situation that turned out okay. Now I'm back in the same situation.
I have had 2 condoms break with 2 different partners. Once in mid March and once in mid May. I read the condom and lube links and did things right...I don't know why I have this problem. Anyway, I know the girl from March tests regularly and was negative in her previous test about a month before our encounter. The girl in May I'm not sure about but I can ask. What's scary about the second incident is that there was a bit of blood on my penis when I withdrew and realized the condom broke! I don't know if she was just starting her period or what but it sure scared me. I thought about going for PEP but didn't which I somewhat regret now.

Anyway, fast forward to about a week ago when I developed this strange dry cough. Never had anything like this before. No phlegm or mucus coming up, just a dry cough that won't go away and a little shortness of breath. No other cold symptoms, no diarrhea, night sweats or sore throat, and I haven't noticed any lymph node problems. I do feel more fatigued than usual. I know you guys always say symptoms mean nothing but this has me really scared! I'm a non-smoker and have never had shortness of breath and dry cough! Assuming the worst, isn't  6 - 12 weeks too soon to be having respiratory problems? Man this has me shook up. I figure it's been close to 5 weeks since the May incident. I'll try to wait another week and go test but I might just go tomorrow because I'm having a hard time with this creepy cough that won't go away. Thoughts anyone?

Offline Ann

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Re: Ok...now I'm really scared
« Reply #1 on: June 20, 2007, 07:13:54 PM »
Murph,

Instead of testing tomorrow, you'd be wiser to see your doctor about your cough. Chances are extremely high that it's nothing at all to do with hiv.

You seem to already know the drill - you do need to test but the odds are significantly in your favour of testing negative as hiv is difficult to transmit and more so from a woman to a man. The earliest you should test is six weeks, and a six week negative needs to be confirmed at three months.

I'll repeat - you should see your doctor about your cough instead of hiv testing tomorrow. There are plenty of other illnesses out there besides hiv and hiv is the least likely explanation for your cough.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Murphys Law

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Re: Ok...now I'm really scared
« Reply #2 on: June 20, 2007, 07:25:50 PM »
Hi Ann,

Thanks for the reply. I sure hope you're right. The blood exposure is what worries me the most. I'll make an appointment to be seen about the cough before testing for HIV.

ML

Offline Murphys Law

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  • Posts: 8
Re: Ok...now I'm really scared
« Reply #3 on: June 22, 2007, 05:00:08 PM »
I think I'm in trouble. A bad sore throat started last night. I haven't got to see a doctor yet about my cough but I did end up taking any Elisa test this afternoon (6.5 weeks after possible exposure) Bad idea testing on Friday...waiting until Monday for results causes too much anxiety. I felt like my odds were 50/50 a few days ago....now 80/20 against. Sure hope I'm wrong!!!

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Ok...now I'm really scared
« Reply #4 on: June 22, 2007, 05:56:47 PM »
Murphys Law, is there a reason you came to this forum? You haven't listened to anyone. So you have to worry over the weekend, you created the worry so you'll have to deal with it. 

Offline Murphys Law

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  • Posts: 8
Re: Ok...now I'm really scared
« Reply #5 on: June 22, 2007, 06:45:09 PM »
Rapid,

I haven't listened to anyone? The only person who replied to my post was Ann and she said the earliest I should test is 6 weeks. I calculated the exact time to be over 6 weeks so I tested. At least Monday I'll know. I'm very aware that I created the worry and will have to deal with it. Is there a reason for your post? If so, I missed it.


ML




Offline RapidRod

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Re: Ok...now I'm really scared
« Reply #6 on: June 22, 2007, 07:11:46 PM »
The point being, you were here a year ago going through the same thing. I'm sure the information Ann gave you this time was no different than the last.

Offline Murphys Law

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  • Posts: 8
Re: Ok...now I'm really scared
« Reply #7 on: June 24, 2007, 04:17:54 PM »
Rapid,

Last year I asked if I should seek PEP. I didn't based on a number of factors. This year I wish I did. After reading a ton of posts I've come to realize something about this forum. People choose to respond mostly to questions about ridiculously low or no risk situations. If someone comes here and says "I was picking at a hangnail and later I fingered a prostitute after which I popped a pimple without washing my hands. Do I have HIV?" then they can expect at least 20 replies. If someone asks about a situation with real risk they get very few replies. Usually something like "HIV is a fragile, hard to transmit virus and the odds are in your favor of testing negative" and that's it. I do understand that when there is a real risk there isn't much good to say. The person just has to wait and see. In hindsight, I wish I would have simply stated my risk and asked if I should seek PEP...or better yet just went and got it. Now, I'm pretty sure I'm fucked but it is what it is. I'm a big boy...I made my bed and now I have to lay in it. In less than 24 hours I'll know and I'll be sure to update my result right here. I know all of you have your own problems and don't owe anybody anything.

ML

Offline RapidRod

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  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Ok...now I'm really scared
« Reply #8 on: June 24, 2007, 04:51:58 PM »
The reason you don't get anymore replies is that there is nothing more to add to Ann's post. What would you want us to say that you've haven't heard before, or that you don't already know from being in the same predicament from the past?

Offline Murphys Law

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  • Posts: 8
Re: Ok...now I'm really scared
« Reply #9 on: June 24, 2007, 05:31:26 PM »
Whatever. In that case, why do people respond to some idiot who had no risk to begin with 30 times or more? Not looking for an argument or even a response because it just doesn't matter.

ML


Offline Murphys Law

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  • Posts: 8
Re: Ok...now I'm really scared
« Reply #10 on: June 25, 2007, 08:11:45 PM »
As stated yesterday, here I am to post my test result. Man...it was really hard walking into the lab this afternoon. I almost couldn't make it but I forced myself. The nurse avoided making eye contact which scared the crap out of me. She had to call next door where they keep the results to have mine brought over. She invited me to sit but I said I'd rather stand. After what seemed like forever another nurse showed up with the envelope. I couldn't bring myself to open it right then. I took it and left, nobody said a word. I thought about it and decided I would walk to the beach which was 5 minutes away and open it there. I went to a deserted area across from the first hotel I stayed in when I came to Brazil almost 2 years ago. After about 10 minutes I found the courage to just do it. I eased the letter out of the envelope and the first thing I saw was HIV + in great big letters. I almost fell out. It took me several seconds to realize that was just the heading for the type of test I had taken. It said Anti HIV I + II. The HIV and the + is what jumped out at me and nearly gave me heart failure. I forced myself to scroll down the page where much to my relief I saw "Nao Reagente" (Portuguese) under the "resultado" heading. Man was that a relief! It's only a  6 week test and I know I need to wait another 7 weeks and test again. I've read here many times that a 6 week result is unlikely to change. If it does, what is usually the reason? I feel better but understand I'm not out of the woods yet. I was sick all weekend and I still am now. If I'm actually positive and currently in the middle of seroconversion (the past 5 - 7 days) would I have tested positive? I'm looking to ease my mind and shake this depression I feel. I've decided to take a break from sex until I'm in a committed relationship. I just don't feel it's worth the risk. Over the last 5 days I've probably read over 1,000 posts on this forum. I've learned an amazing amount about the people affected by this virus and it has made me feel greater compassion and respect for you all. I plan to stick around this site one way or another so if anyone ever wants to reach out, I'll be here. I wish you all the best!

ML

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Ok...now I'm really scared
« Reply #11 on: June 26, 2007, 04:01:32 AM »
Murph,

It's highly unlikely that you will go on to test anything other than negative after this incident. I've yet to see a man end up positive after a condom break with a woman - period or no period.

The average time for enough antibodies to be present to cause a person to test positive is 22 days. At six weeks, if you were still in the process of developing antibodies you most likely would have tested positive or indeterminate. You didn't - you tested negative. It's highly unlikly that the situation will change.

Get your confirmation at three months and in the mean time, put this out of your mind and get on with your life, remembering to always use condoms and use them correctly. A correctly used condom rarely breaks.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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