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Author Topic: Unprotected sex+PEP(48hrs left)  (Read 3691 times)

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Offline richdelion

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Unprotected sex+PEP(48hrs left)
« on: May 21, 2007, 05:39:32 PM »
Thanks everyone in advance for replying. I had my first gay sex and i am so worried of catching HIV. We first had protected oral sex both ways and proceed onto protected anal sex with lube with me as top only for about 15 minutes with me ejaculated inside condom. After I finished I did not bother to check the condom carefully to see if it was broken or not and threw it away. When i pulled out i did not notice any sperm leaking so can i assume that it did not break? But i saw some feces on the condom, because i felt something poke my penis when i was inside of him and notice some feces on the condom within seconds of me finishing. Can feces inside his anus poke a hole in my condom and if so would the hole cause significant damage to be noticed? I asked him if he felt any ejaculation, and he said no, would he noticed it? Sorry bout this but this is my first gay sex as a top so not sure how a bottom will feel. It has been 6 weeks now since exposure, and no symptoms of ARS but had a sinus infection after one week; a slight cold after 2.5 weeks with no fever just a littel sore throat and no rash or fatigues, got rid of it within 2 days, does this sound like ARS??? I got a little worried. I know my exposure was protected but i have read a few stories in the "living with hiv" that some people tested pos+ and cant understand it bc they have always practice safe sex, just got me freaked out even more???? Any input on this, please???
So, please do i need testing at all??? Can i assume my condom did not break?? Can feces poke a hole in it without me knowing it??? Thank you all.

Offline richdelion

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Re: Worried about first time gay sex, please advise!!!
« Reply #1 on: May 21, 2007, 05:43:15 PM »
sorry, i read in "i just tested psotive". Another question, i hear a lot about ARS, does anyone remember or had them? thank you so much.

Offline ACinKC

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Re: Worried about first time gay sex, please advise!!!
« Reply #2 on: May 21, 2007, 05:48:33 PM »
Whoa there...settle down, take a deep breath and let it out... 

You had protected sex and therefore were protected from any exposure to HIV.  You would notice if the condom broke it is very obvious!  And turds dont have any drilling equipment attatched to them to "poke through" the condom so you are ok there as well.

I think this has much more to do with it being your first time than any actual risk but so you are better informed I urge you to read through our lessons contained in the Welcome Thread at the top of this forum.

I would not test over this incident at all.  ARS is different for everyone and we dont discuss symptoms on this board.  As to others who claim to have had safe sex and still contracted HIV, the science doesnt prove these stories to be true.  As some peoples motives and memories are not always 100% true, these are not quite the best way to collect this type of data. 

Relax and try to move on.  Always use condoms for intercourse and you will have no worries regarding HIV.
« Last Edit: May 21, 2007, 05:50:52 PM by ACinKC »
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline Ann

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Re: Worried about first time gay sex, please advise!!!
« Reply #3 on: May 21, 2007, 06:04:04 PM »
Rich,

I deleted the thread you created in the Just Tested forum - you said you knew you shouldn't be in there and you're right. DON'T do it again!

You didn't have an exposure. Condoms have been proven to protect against hiv infection. If the condom broke you would have known, without doubt.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline richdelion

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  • Posts: 8
Re: Worried about first time gay sex, please advise!!!
« Reply #4 on: May 21, 2007, 06:10:03 PM »
Sorry, I just been freaking out for no reason and I am quite a rational guy but when it comes to hiv I just loose all sense of rationality and just need some e-reality and reassurance. thank you for such a quick response, thank you.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Worried about first time gay sex, please advise!!!
« Reply #5 on: May 21, 2007, 06:34:07 PM »
Rich, the bottom line in all of this uproar you're experiencing is that you did exactly what you should do when you have intercourse: you wore a condom. Good deal! They provide very effective protection whether the hershey highway is fudgepacked or not.

You can stop worrying about whether the condom broke. When that happens it's not some itty bitty subtle event. It suddenly looks as if your dick has a fringed hula hoop on it. So you can assume the condom did the very effective job of protecting you for which it has proven very effective.

I suspect that because this was your first male to male experience you had a lot of feelings of all sorts before, during and afterwards. Both exciting and anxiety provoking. As long as you consistently use condoms whether as the insertive or receptive partner you are covered as far as HIV is concerned.

There's no need for testing. Just make sure you go at a pace you're comfortable with and always, ALWAYS keep those condoms handy and USE THEM.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline richdelion

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Re: Worried about first time gay sex, please advise!!!
« Reply #6 on: May 21, 2007, 09:19:32 PM »
Thank you so much again. I will try to come to some senses, thank you.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Worried about first time gay sex, please advise!!!
« Reply #7 on: May 21, 2007, 10:20:48 PM »
Just keep breathing, (especially nice and deep and slowly when you're tensing up), keep the condoms handy and take your time with whatever you do.

When it comes to navigating matters of sex and love we're all just on a learning curve.

Cheers, 
Andy Velez

Offline richdelion

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  • Posts: 8
Oral sex and saliva
« Reply #8 on: May 23, 2007, 11:31:56 PM »
Can someone clarify this for me, since im a little confused. I hear that saliva contains little hiv therefore making it hard to catch it this way, but if someone suck on your penis and there was a lot of saliva invlove, so how can hiv not pass this way, for example for the insertive partner?Receptive?

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Oral sex and saliva
« Reply #9 on: May 23, 2007, 11:52:26 PM »
Rich,

You should keep all your additional thoughts, comments and questions in your original thread. This helps us follow your story and give you accurate advice.

If you can't find your original thread, click on the link "show own posts" which you'll find in the left hand corner of any forums page.

MtD

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Oral sex and saliva
« Reply #10 on: May 24, 2007, 06:37:39 AM »
Rich,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines.

And don't let me catch you posting in other people's threads again either. Make sure you read and take heed of the Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

Saliva is absolutely NOT infectious for hiv. Not only that, but it also contains over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that inhibit and destroy hiv.

Not one person has ever become infected with hiv through getting a blowjob and you certainly won't be the first.

As for being the person who is giving the blowjob, unless you have absolutely horrible oral health, you don't have to worry. There have been long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one. This shows us two things. One, condoms are very effective for the prevention of hiv transmission. Two, we now have the evidence that oral sex isn't a real concern where hiv transmission is concerned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline richdelion

  • Member
  • Posts: 8
Unprotected sex+PEP(48hrs left)
« Reply #11 on: March 19, 2008, 05:52:32 PM »
I have met this girl who is actually a spanish teacher at my university a month ago, we had 3 times protected sex, and last nite we had unprotected sex for about 2-5minutes if even that long, at first I did not notice any blood on my penis for about 2 minutes. Then for about 1minute I saw blood on the side of my penis I immediately stopped, the blood was thick and chunky(remnants of her period which she said ended this past satruday). I clean the blood around my penis, and there seem to be no trace of blood on the head and i open the holes and saw no blood in them either, the upper hole was close and the bottom hole was a little open, I have no trauma or std. I asked her if she is clean and she said she got tested about 1.5yr ago, and Im the first guy shes been with since she broke up with her BF 3 months ago; I email her again today about her status and she told me that she does not have anything. I went to my University HIV department, and told the doc what happen and he said that PEP was not warranted bc she is not confirmed positive and even if she was positive the intercourse was not very long and saw it as minimal risk.
1) Could the blood(kinda thick) got into my holes and ended around my penis due to in and out motion?
2)If the blood got into my holes, would i have notice blood in the holes when i open them up?
3)WAs the doctor right about not giving me PEP?Minimal risk? I thought this would be high since blood was involved?

Thank you all.

Thank you all


Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Unprotected sex+PEP(48hrs left)
« Reply #12 on: March 19, 2008, 06:02:23 PM »
I agree with your doctor that PEP is not warranted in this case. HIV is a fragile virus and not easy to transmit. It is significantly more difficult to transmit from female to male. Given what you have described of this brief incident and even allowing for menstrual blood, this was a very low level risk situation.

However, since you did have this very brief unprotected incident, prudence dictates that you ought to get tested at 13 weeks past the most recent such incident. I certainly expect you will test negative.

You do need to always wear a condom no matter how well you think you know your partner. No exceptions until such time as you may find yourself in a securely monogamous relationship in which both partners have tested negative together. As far as asking a partner about their status, that means zilch in terms of what you need to do to protect your health. Even well meaning people don't necessarily know their HIV status. So you have to always behave responsibly in protecting your health which means use condoms everytime.

Lastly, using the term "clean" to refer to someone's HIV or STD status is very offensive. People either have the virus or an STD or not. Having it doesn't make them "dirty." Please don't use that kind of term again.

I expect you to come out of this situation without any HIV problem.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline richdelion

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  • Posts: 8
Re: Unprotected sex+PEP(48hrs left)
« Reply #13 on: March 19, 2008, 06:08:31 PM »
Thank you, I know it was rude for me to ask that, since i freaked at the moment, i plan on getting tested, thank you for such a quick response, and sorry if i have offended anyone on here.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Unprotected sex+PEP(48hrs left)
« Reply #14 on: March 19, 2008, 06:11:04 PM »
Well, I know you didn't intend to be rude. And I do appreciate that in the heat of a highly anxious moment sometimes we express ourselves in uncharacteristic ways. So just keep it in mind for future reference.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Unprotected sex+PEP(48hrs left)
« Reply #15 on: March 20, 2008, 08:38:36 AM »
Rich,

I've had to merge your threads again. How many times do you have to be asked to read and abide by our forum posting guidelines, found in the Welcome Thread? It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page. Now please, get with the program!

I agree with Andy. You don't need PEP, but you do need to test at the three month point.

And what didn't you understand about my previous post to you?

Rich,

I deleted the thread you created in the Just Tested forum - you said you knew you shouldn't be in there and you're right. DON'T do it again!

You didn't have an exposure. Condoms have been proven to protect against hiv infection. If the condom broke you would have known, without doubt.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.


Ann


Save yourself all this worry and use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, EVERY TIME, NO EXCEPTIONS, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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