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Author Topic: Real risk assesmente and Pep Recomendations?  (Read 7512 times)

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Offline desperado

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Real risk assesmente and Pep Recomendations?
« on: June 24, 2006, 08:45:31 PM »
Friends,

After been almost 1 year sober from Aidsmedsoholic, I am hook again completely paralize with fear!
I cant live this way anymore it is insane.
Last time a year ago i did a CD4/CD8 ratio before knowing my hiv satus??? you can imagine how insane I am...! Obviously, Tim H, Andy. Jnikalt2 , Hiv worker, Muffy Not Ann which I can imagine you are relatively new but? (I like how you express your self!) I create a little mess on the forum because I did have every of you interprating my labs,
However on Monday I am supposed to do a complete test in order to get the job I always did want, in this country the can do anything they want thats the way it works.
After my last HIV test 2 years ago which was -ve! I did not learn my lesson, and I did quit SA as well since I couldnt achieved real sobriety from lust.
I did start with my compulsive behaviors ie Insertive oral sex W/trannies like 40 times in the last 2 years one time I notice my penis did have a small scratch,oupss! and twice I give oral for not more that 5 seconds and one time i could just taste very slightly semen oupps again with that one, never penetrative sex and like 10 times mutual masturbation with spreding the semen through my fingers hhmmm not to smart if cutd where present wich i dont recall any, but i eat my nail once in a while.
I did have in 2 ocassion a recuring small herpes lession that i have since i was 13 I guess?
Any how two weeks after my last encounter only Mast & insertive Oral the she to me! I was very sick with all the simptomns of the book!!!! except for a rash that has last me more than two weeks and fatigue hmmmm....!
I did never see blood in my penis from the other person but once I so in this web and argument between ANN & HIV Worker regarding large sores & blood, in insertive oral sex? some of you would remeber?
I am not articulating very well my thoughts at this time and sorry for the spelling, I lost 9 kilos I am only in a survival mode due to the test I have to go through on monday, I cant think clearly, I have a son which is my most presous gift that live with his mother thanks god!!
I dont have the guts and courage to do a test and face reality it is just to strong for me.
I know everything about HIV?? because i am an old timer with this thing Doc Bob and the hole smurf.. you can imagine.
I want to quit this new job opportunity because of the fear and remain in my actual one?
anyhow I need help but I am not sure which type of help 
   

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #1 on: June 24, 2006, 09:00:35 PM »
Ok Desperado,

As far as I can make out you're concerned about taking a job related HIV test, yes?

Since you've been an AIDSMEDS member previously you should already know that HIV is transmitted via:

Unprotected anal sex;
Unprotected vaginal sex;
Sharing contaminated injecting equipment (eg needles and syringes).

Receiving a blow job is not a risk for HIV. Please read our Welcome Thread.

MtD

Offline desperado

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Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #2 on: June 24, 2006, 09:26:56 PM »
Thanks Matty!

I wish with all my hart it was as simple as you describe it....!!!
I can understand the positivims and reafirming answers POZ do in this forums, specially that they are real people with real lives and real concerns, helping others to understand better how it works with HIV!
However if you listen to non POZ doctors, like Tebas & Santana from the Body and many others they do have a diferent scenario!!
I dont want to draw your atention as before, I am not good at controling some sexual behaviors as I described before and I ve living more than 10 years being POZ (mentally) with out having it and now 2 not knowing yet.
I just want to be able to diferentiate what real and whats not?I am really tired and exhausted, I thought this night mare was gone and hear I am again.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #3 on: June 24, 2006, 09:33:11 PM »
Thanks Matty!

I wish with all my hart it was as simple as you describe it....!!!
I can understand the positivims and reafirming answers POZ do in this forums, specially that they are real people with real lives and real concerns, helping others to understand better how it works with HIV!
However if you listen to non POZ doctors, like Tebas & Santana from the Body and many others they do have a diferent scenario!!
I dont want to draw your atention as before, I am not good at controling some sexual behaviors as I described before and I ve living more than 10 years being POZ (mentally) with out having it and now 2 not knowing yet.
I just want to be able to diferentiate what real and whats not?I am really tired and exhausted, I thought this night mare was gone and hear I am again.


Desperado,

First up -- stay away from The Body. You get much better advice here at AIDSMEDS. The only thing I ever see coming out of The Body is stressed out people like you. I, like many people here, don't have a great deal of respect for The Body. We seem to spend a lot of our time cleaning up their mistakes.

Next, you seem to be saying that you believe you're HIV positive even though your test results come back negative. If you've not tested positive for HIV you're not HIV positive. It really is that simple.

If all you've done is receive a headjob, then you have nothing to worry about. Really you need to calm down. I would suggest that you seek the assistance of a mental health professional to deal with your fears about HIV.

MtD

/edited for a small but unforgivable spelling error/
« Last Edit: June 25, 2006, 01:02:17 AM by matty.the.damned »

Offline desperado

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Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #4 on: June 24, 2006, 10:01:14 PM »
Matty,

It was not 1 was like 40 and one with posible herp lession? and the person doing the suking with sores? Down hear is not like the US that the mayority have "Colgate type of teeths!!!!
What about the 2 5 second head i gave with dried taste of semen?
And having semen on my hands that are not as well the US type Nivea look??
I forgot some deep kissing 6 times and I sufferd from mouth ulcers maybe due to the bloody meat that we eat down here every F day.
And how about the symptoms that are persisting some of them fatigue, feeling of shaking and rash on certain parts of skin axles and belly and legs!!

You see it is not that simple!!

but at least you give me hope and I am grateful for that   

Offline desperado

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Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #5 on: June 24, 2006, 10:11:52 PM »
Dear Tim,

I noticed you are log in, would you mind giving a hand with this??? promise not to bother again, I know there are more important things to do, but I need your advice badly, I am asking a signal to my higher power and that will be your usual honest and sincere feedback!!
Should I go for that new Job???????????????? and do the test!!! all by faith??

Tks,

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #6 on: June 25, 2006, 12:11:52 AM »
Under no circumstances were you at risk for HIV from receiving oral sex. This side of the forum is VERY good at self-policing. If someone says something inaccurate, no fewer than four other folks will chime in with corrections or requests for clarification.

Matty's advice is solid. And since you have been here before, you know that I am only interested in quantifiable data.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Ann

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Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #7 on: June 25, 2006, 05:27:35 AM »
Desperado,

I'm not new here - I've been a member since 2001. It's only in the last year that I've contributed to this side of the forum regularly.

I hope you've read through the Welcome Thread by now and followed the link to the new Transmission Lesson. If you have, you will know that protected intercourse and getting blowjobs are not risks for hiv infection. You will also know that becoming infected through giving a blowjob is extremely rare. Extremely. So much so that we don't really even recommend testing over it.

However, we DO recommend that anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

As you have already been told in this thread, we don't really care what other sites say about hiv transmission. We don't base our answers on their answers. We do our own research of the current, first-tier, peer-reviewed, scientific/medical journals. Our answers are based on science and are free from moral judgements and religious dogma. You get the real, scientific deal here.

According to the science, as long as you use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse you will avoid hiv infection. It really, really is that simple.

Go get your annual, routine sexual health check up and let us know when you get your negative results.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline desperado

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  • Posts: 20
Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #8 on: June 25, 2006, 07:20:31 AM »
Thanks Ann first Class as well!

I went to the web page you recomend Aidsmap, it is very especific,I been long enough reading all this year, that I know by now that I will never get a straigh answer and it is mote what I want listen?  It is addictived this hole scenario at least to me? It is my spining sindrome!
But going back to Aidsmaps on safer sex they do have a couple of concerns with oral sex, cuts and I forgot to inlude a 3 times 10 seconds riming?? oups

anyhow dont mind here I come again with my insanity..it sucks... it has been another bad night.

I guess there is only one way out at least temporary (a test) but hiv fear has been for so long a huge part of my live, that I am afraid of not been able to let it go my lat incident was 7 weels ago? and I have to make a desition prior to this new job?? I wonder if i am inconciensly what they call a bug chaser I hope not, i do get terrified with the idea.

It is not the right time to go once again with this process! It happenes to me everytime either I feel sick or this work situation.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #9 on: June 25, 2006, 09:49:59 AM »
Desperado, I'm wondering what you would like in the way of help here.

Obviously in general we come from a point of view which encourages getting tested when there is any doubt about HIV status. And those doubts can exist even when there hasn't been what we consider to be real risks. Anyone who's sexually active is suggested to get a full STD panel done regularly -- at least annually.

Much of what you have expressed is about feelings rather than facts. From what you have written it seems as if you're living with a lot of painful feelings and concerns. Just wondering if you can you get some support dealing with those issues so you don't have to struggling with them in isolation.

Andy Velez

Offline desperado

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  • Posts: 20
Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #10 on: June 25, 2006, 10:26:33 AM »
Andy thank you for showing up, with your good insight as always!

I am aware of what you said and I am willing to take responsability for my acts!

One thing for sure is that I would never place somenone at risk if I know I cand hurt them in any way.

The fact is that I am hook again with you guys?? dont get me wrong but foe me is not advisable to dig in the web this things, I am powerless to al this yes/no/yes/no and all the ifis  if this, if that an all that crap.

But being realistic and based on facts, I havent done any high risk activity but several low risk ones wright?? No why I can believed in what ann 6 Jknlt2 saids that as long as we use condoms properly for penetrative sex everything will be Ok!!

Andy basen on the activities I very honestly described before what is your sor of veredict if you are on a condition to answer!

This thing about Oral sex insertive which i did almost 40 times is not that peace of cake wright?

Remember the argument betwen Ann & Hiv worker on oral?? this Hiv-w as far as I remeber knows extremelly well his stuff wright? and Ann she is solid and speaks with authority as well.

Any how Andy, thanks for your patience, so far this the only support I have and if I am going in circules again dont bother, I though I would never get in thisd roller stuff......?   

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #11 on: June 25, 2006, 10:50:13 AM »
The bottom line in all of this is that anyone who's sexually active is wise to get tested regularly, at least annually.

The activities you have described are all at the bottom of the risk list.

The real question is how much of your life and energy you are willing to spend on torturing yourself with worries and fears instead of simply getting tested -- and collecting what I expect will be a negative result.

Is this any way to be spending your life? Worrying and fretting and getting stuck on what ifs? Doesn't sound it to me, but you'll have to decide for yourself.

Andy Velez

Offline desperado

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  • Posts: 20
Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #12 on: June 26, 2006, 03:18:50 PM »
Tim, Andy, Ann,

I will be receiving my test in the next hour?? I am dying and vanishing!! could you please help???
My last exposure oral insertive and Mutual with lots of semen on my hand was 7 weeks ago.
Is the test which is 3 generation comes negative 7 weeks could I rely on it??
Are you 100% sure with your statement that as long as penetrative sex was protected w/condom my test will be Ok?? sweard to God?

Please answer I am the guy from Argentina!!!

tks,

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #13 on: June 26, 2006, 03:47:39 PM »
Desperado,

You haven't had a risk of hiv infection so yes, you can take today's result as conclusive.

And yes, condoms are very effective when it comes to the prevention of hiv. Use condoms and avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline desperado

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  • Posts: 20
Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #14 on: June 26, 2006, 03:54:09 PM »
God Bless you Ann!

And If you are right two times more!!

I will received my results in 36 minutes to be precise, I been driving nuts a friend who works in the laboratory??

Did you read my hole story?? and all the risky situations Iwas in???

Y,


Offline desperado

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  • Posts: 20
Re: Help from Argentina!(Medical check up)
« Reply #15 on: June 26, 2006, 04:09:45 PM »
ANN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You wont believe me my friend just told me that my VDRL & my HIV is NEGATIVE!!!!!!

And with all the risk exposures I went through, I can believe it!!!!!!!!!

I dont want to encourage people to practice risk sex, but you are definitively 100% acurate on your statements.

Thanks to Andy & Tim for their encouragment to do the test and conquer my fear once again!

You guys are doing a great work and god will provide to all of you!!!!!!

Not to come back with my patology!! but is the 7 weeks conclusive?? just kidding but could you reasure me!!!!!!!! so I put it to bed!!!

And Ann please stop smoking my eyes are totaly irritated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love Y all..




 

Offline desperado

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Back to the old days!
« Reply #16 on: February 09, 2007, 09:47:51 AM »
Ann, Andy & Tim,

After almost 8 months from my last hiv test, which took me for years 8 of living in pain & fear thinking I was Hiv poz, and found out that it was not throuhg,

4 days ago I engaged in a stupid riskier act, I performed oral sex without ejaculation or even feeling pre cum for like 3 minutes to a tranny? she performed to em as well but that is almost cero risk!

I swared to god that when i was in the middle of the bloody action and with a couple of drinks inside hmm... (that was the biggest screw up i guess?) l just did remember Ann and Andy comments that as long you use condoms for intercourse every thing was going to be OK!
I start again after 8 months of been sober of Aidmeds and my self!! to start calling all the bloody HIV hotlines in the world trying to find the right answers t my once again Paranoia? I thought and I promise my self I was never going to act sexually that way again It's Insane?
I really dont want to start the same process again it is just to much, specially that I was suppose to start a new relationship with someone worth it?
I know my dilema goes far beyond Aidsmeds and has to be more with Lust and drinking, but who to trust in terms of Hiv, even if I want to be objective, is more strong than me and my head change everyfive minutes and I can not live???? ridiculous!!
Ann are those new studies from cerodescordant couples new or is the same spaish...........?

   

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #17 on: February 09, 2007, 10:14:19 AM »
Keep all your questions and thoughts in your original thread. You know how the guidelines work.

Offline ACinKC

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #18 on: February 09, 2007, 10:15:32 AM »
in addition to what rod said.

You didnt have a risk.  But somehow I dont think telling you that is going to help.
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #19 on: February 09, 2007, 11:41:35 AM »
desperado,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

There have now been several serodiscordant studies and they all came to the same conclusion.

It's rare for a person to become infected through giving a blowjob and under the circumstances of your incident, you don't even need testing. No ejaculation, no precum, no real risk.

I don't recommend testing over this specific incident. You only need to test if it is part of your regular ROUTINE sexual health care check ups.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline desperado

  • Member
  • Posts: 20
Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #20 on: February 15, 2007, 06:43:44 PM »
Thank you Ann,

I ve been trying to stay away from the forums, but.....! here we go again with the 1000 question and unfortunately diging into the Living with...? there are a couple of statements that do mentioned having adquired the bug through oral receptive???
I am not sure if there was precum involved in my encounter? I think not? but what if...?
On the oderside I was once again questionig all posible scenarios?? insane...ehh.!
I know that the piont of view of some of the folks are based on the current situation? like yours who has a stable relationship so you have to back up your statements as well as jnkntl or something like that? but even him would not aloud someone to performed oral on him?.....hmmmm? I know that today I am not in my best frame of mind and I need some reasurrance but real one! I am responsible for my actions and I just want to be realistic about what happened!
Could you help me or I just have to go to the same bloody process again?
There are more info stating that you could get from giving head than viceversa?
Maybe tomorrow will be a better day-

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #21 on: February 15, 2007, 06:49:51 PM »
There is no reason what so ever to go over this again with you. We don't do "what ifs or buts." Reread all the replies that you have received.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #22 on: February 15, 2007, 08:54:38 PM »
No, here we DON'T go again.

HIV is not the issue.

If you can't let go of this unwarranted concern then it's time for you to see a therapist or other mental health specialist to get help with whatever is driving your worries.

You've been given whatever we're capable of here. This is not an HIV issue. Period.

If you can't let go then you need some help which we cannot provide here.
Andy Velez

Offline desperado

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #23 on: February 17, 2007, 02:00:41 PM »
Sorry guys,

I hope you dont get offended? it is not my intention honestly, but frankly when we talk about irrefutable evidence why does the Jonh Hopkingd which I belived is one of the mayor Hospital in the states and this Mr Gallant who claime to be one the finest specialist in yur country?

I know the only real thing to do is to get tested!!

I do appreciatte what you are doing and many but many times I have had support through your website and i am grateful for that, however the statement below is from January 2007??? are new things that you may not know about transmission?? can happened i gues? specially if some of you dont work in hospitals.

Dont get me wrong please I am just trying to cope as better as I can with this.


Bless you all



------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hi Dr. Gallant- I have read your site with interest recently, and I was hoping you could summarize the answer to a simple question for me-- I am involved in a new homosexual relationship with a man who disclosed to me early in our dating that he is HIV positive. I am trying to find out what sexual acts would be considered safe (or "safer" as the case may be) for me to minimize the risk of infection. I realize this
question is answered in piecemeal throughout your site, but I was hoping you could give me a codified answer.

Thanks so much... great site-- B 
   
  Highest risk: unprotected anal sex with you on the bottom

Medium risk: unprotected anal sex with you on the top, or giving him oral sex & getting semen or pre-cum in your mouth.

Low risk: protected anal sex with you on the bottom (risky only if the condom breaks), rimming

Essentially no risk: kissing, hugging, mutual masturbation, him giving you oral sex, protected anal sex with you on top
 

Offline Ann

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #24 on: February 17, 2007, 02:40:34 PM »
desperado,

What's the problem? The post you quote isn't anything we don't say. To say that something is "essentially no risk" is no different than saying it's a theoretical risk, which is no different to saying that it doesn't happen in the real world.

I suggest you seek the help of a mental health care professional to find out why you continue to be obsessed with hiv risks. You have moved on beyond the scope of this forum.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline desperado

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #25 on: February 17, 2007, 06:08:48 PM »
Ann,

You may be right with me not been in the best frame of mind, but saying that oral (giving not receiving is almost anecdotal? or that as long as you use condom por penetrative sexeverything is going to be oK wow!! differ alot from what this mr Gallant state?? he saids that giving oral with or with out male fluids is Medium risk? not very very low or "rare" as its described in this website?
I am just more concern of sending the wrong messageto all the folks who refer to this web? thats all.
You should be more carefull and your assumptions I guess.


..............Medium risk: unprotected anal sex with you on the top, or giving him oral sex & getting semen or pre-cum in your mouth.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #26 on: February 17, 2007, 06:13:34 PM »
desperado, Ann has never gave you false information. Now if you don't like the information that she has given. There are more forums for you to play on besides AidsMeds.

Offline Ann

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #27 on: February 17, 2007, 06:21:01 PM »
deperado,

Crickey, I thought you were going on about the last part of that post. I read the rest of it a little too quickly - including the whole line on medium risk. My mistake and I'm sorry. Giving a blowjob is low risk. Very low.

Guess what. We also tell people that the only way to truly know your status is through testing. You can believe what you want to believe about risk levels, the proof is in the testing.

Ann

edited for a typo
« Last Edit: February 17, 2007, 07:10:29 PM by Ann »
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #28 on: February 17, 2007, 06:21:14 PM »
Desperado, you are certainly free to follow any advice from elsewhere that suits you.

We're absolutely not interested in spending any energy in disagreements with what you glean from other websites. If those suit you, fine with us. We tell you what we know to be so. You don't have to agree with us.

You've spent a lot of time here and gotten a lot of attention. We've told you our points of view about the issues you have raised. That's it. We can't do anymore for you beyond this. I say it's time for you to move on. We're not here to simply hold your hand and indulge you.

Consider yourself warned.

If you're genuinely concerned about your HIV status, then as Ann suggested, the answer is very simple. Get tested. 
« Last Edit: February 17, 2007, 06:23:11 PM by Andy Velez »
Andy Velez

Offline desperado

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #29 on: February 17, 2007, 07:08:33 PM »
Gentlemens & Ladies,

There is no need to get upset or emotional? I appreciate what you do and I have said it since the begining, you guys have been my only support on those black mondays and I am grateful for that I personally simpatize very much with Ann, Andy and Tim.
I do agree that some how I am not well especially when it comes to HIV, I do sometime think that been poz would solve my long long fear problems.
The reason why this time has been very difficult to trust and let go is that I just start a relatioship with someone somehoe doesnt deserve what I have to offer?
My initial specific question was what are the risk assesment of performing oral 3 minutes on a high risk person, not been sure about pre fluids? that was all?
I was somehoe especting a traditional very straight forwasd Ann type of answer?
I am afraid of this new relationship,  I was doing very well until that bloody night when I felt resentful, isolated and I did act out. the worst part is that I ask her to do her HIV test and now how will I will tell her or start using rubbers again after the hole smurf I did to her.
And every time I do call or verify  in other place either hot line or web site I get terrible answer that hook me up in my terrible fears.

You are entirely right on not answering, I may have severely brain damage or whatsoever but i have never been desrepectful to any of you, it is not my style? I did not born in the US and I am not paranoic or blaming nothing.

Offline Ann

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #30 on: February 17, 2007, 07:14:01 PM »
Quote
My initial specific question was what are the risk assesment of performing oral 3 minutes on a high risk person, not been sure about pre fluids?

Desp,

People are not high risk, activities are. You didn't have a high risk, you had a very, very low one. Test if you want and collect your negative result.

This forum is not the place to hash out your emotional difficulties. We are not getting emotional about this subject, you are. Seek professional help. Your concerns are outside the scope of this forum and this is the last time you will be warned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline desperado

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #31 on: February 17, 2007, 07:38:43 PM »
Thanks Ann as always not only for your advise and support, but for your patience and understanding!

I swerd to god that i will not bother any of you never again, but please just tell me if I can go ahead and continue my relation ship as it was before the incident or if I should use the condom until my 3 months??

I know this may sound like making you acountable once again, but to teel you the true you are the only one who did save my life last time when I was on the test process and you where 100 accurate.

Would you mind just answering this and you will not hear from me again, but pleas be as straight as you could be with me pleaseeee.!

Regards,

Offline DontKnowWhatToDo2

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #32 on: February 18, 2007, 03:41:55 AM »
nvm
« Last Edit: February 18, 2007, 12:14:36 PM by DontKnowWhatToDo2 »

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #33 on: February 18, 2007, 04:41:42 AM »
DontKnowWhatToDo2, keep all your concerns and thoughts in your own thread. DO NOT post in other threads than you own. 

Offline Ann

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #34 on: February 18, 2007, 07:23:09 AM »
Desp,

You've been here long enough to know that you need to use condoms for intercourse until you're in a securely monogamous relationship where you have BOTH tested negative together. If your relationship isn't monogamous, then keep using condoms.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline desperado

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #35 on: October 16, 2007, 08:04:09 PM »
Could you help me? I am going through a mental binge again??
Since I am feeling sick with a flew I need reasurance and if something has change or if we have new data conserning oral risk??
Since last time I performed Oral 5 or 6 times with no ejaculation and maybe pre cum?? and every time before doing it ANNNNN and ANDYYY!!(I promise, insane but true....) will come into my mind saying as long as you use condoms for intercourse everything will be fine!! As simple as that!! period.. !!Basta..!!No more..!!

However I m having difficulties and I would like if you could answer me persobnally if that still as it was or if thing has change!!

Since time has pass and I havent bother and did behave well I expect and true answer please..

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #36 on: October 16, 2007, 08:29:44 PM »
Nothing has changed if you cannot except your negative results then seek the help of a mental help professional. You are beyound the scope of help this forum is able to offer.

Offline desperado

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #37 on: October 16, 2007, 09:54:10 PM »
RR tks but I havent test since last year?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #38 on: October 17, 2007, 04:01:46 AM »
Refer back to your old posts and reread them. There is no sense rerepeating them.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #39 on: October 17, 2007, 02:46:42 PM »
Nothing has changed in relation to our thoughts about the issues you are concerned about.

We do recommend that in general anyone who's sexually active ought to have a full STD panel done at least annually. Go, get tested and knock yourself out with another negative HIV test result.

Since it seems like you're going to want to continue sucking, how about you see a counselor or therapist. You could discuss what is going on that is causing you to have so much anxiety about HIV when nothing you are doing is really putting at risk. We can't resolve that issue for you here.
Andy Velez

Offline desperado

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Re: Back to the old days!
« Reply #40 on: October 17, 2007, 03:07:04 PM »
Tks Andy, I will get tested next month!
One more thing latelly my gums are bleeding when i brush my teeth? Any of my incidents did take place after hours?
However this time things are not that easy for me everytime I search even on your forums I find not very encouragment statements except for you ann and rr.
Would you please give me Your honest karma that as long as we use Conds for intercoúrse everything will be fine?
I have no where else to go for honest advise

Offline desperado

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Real risk assesmente and Pep Recomendations?
« Reply #41 on: August 10, 2009, 09:02:01 PM »
Hi guys, it was more than 3 years everything was going Ok with me no incidents and behaving well, yesterday I end up drunk with a friend? or at least I know her, we did have unprotected sex twice in 4 hours and is saw the next morning blood present on the blankets from her period I believed???Insane honestly more after being and oldtimer in Aidmeds forums?? no I have to decide if i should go for Pep!
Any advise? this thing about the blood present adds more risk into the situation? would you please assse my risk? I will definitive go for a test in 90 days,

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Real risk assesmente and Pep Recomendations?
« Reply #42 on: August 10, 2009, 09:55:17 PM »
You can't get nPEP unless she is known to be HIV+.

Offline Ann

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Re: Real risk assesmente and Pep Recomendations?
« Reply #43 on: August 10, 2009, 09:58:01 PM »
Desp,

Once again, I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread. Get with the program already!

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.





When are you going to learn? Why do you bother coming to this website when you refuse to learn?

You had a risk. You need to test. It doesn't really matter all that much that she was on her period. You were at risk either way.

However,  you do not need PEP. The guidelines state as much. Just test at the appropriate time.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  



"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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