Main Forums > Someone I Care About Has HIV

Boyfriend is HIV+

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Andy Velez:
JM, as Matty (and others have said), welcome!

Thanks to Matty for having returned this thread to its original purpose which is to welcome and lend support to someone who's come here with a legitimate need.

So JM, you got more of a taste of some in-house stuff that goes on here sometimes. Please don't allow that to stop you from asking questions here or talking about your situation.

Cheers,

snoofle:
hey i was kind of in the same situation as you were..except my boyfriend continued to have sex with me even after knowing he had HIV bc of his fear that i would just leave and i had to find out about his status from rumors that my mother heard..i personally battled with this breach of trust for monthssss..even after i found out i was HIV-negative..ive chosen to stay with him..bc i understand the disease is something difficult to disclose especially in my culture (im eastern indian) but i still hold that resentment for not telling me..in the end, its your decision..dont let him or what he has affect you in any way..you should do whatever makes you happy

pax:
It sounds like he wanted to tell you but was just to afraid. It can be really nerve racking trying to figure out how and when to tell someone.
What happens next is up to you, though. If you are uncomfortable being in a relationship with him, for any reason be it trust or persistent fear of infection or whatnot, that is going to show up in your relationship.

sistagal:


Wat iz it abt him that u love ?  I am glad he finally told you - trust me it aint eezy disclosing your status to someone u love...someone u do not want to loose ... I think he cud have done worse and kept quiete with hope to infect you so that when the both of u go for tests u wud b in the same boat !

Rite now you need to get more info on hiv and u need to know what u are in for shud u d'cide to stay in that relationship ....  in life there is things we can/cannot  live without  ... it is your call !

U need to deal with your psch ...

Hey we the poz are here for u if u wanna chat .....

chemistry001:
Hi JM

If your still here, because after reading some of these posts i wouldn't be surprised if you had been scared off, welcome.
There is a wealth of good suppport and advise here amongst all the mud slinging that appears to have been thrown, just sift your way through it.

I'm the +ive one in my relationship and what i feel is important is that you remain in total communication with your boyfriend and don't be afraid to talk and ask what may seem like dumb questions.

Its been 8 months for me and my boyfriend and it has been a hard road for us both, we have had to take things really slowly as he is scared and i understand this so don't push things, but we do love each other and i know that in time things will be fine for us as I'm sure they will for you too.

The virus has made us closer ( at times its not felt like this), we talk more and have a greater understanding of each others feeling and concerns. So i say give it time and if you really care about each other it can and will work out.

Love to you both
Paul xXx

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