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Author Topic: Gay with HIV who wants kids  (Read 1956 times)

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Offline nyreddgemini

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  • Posts: 2
Gay with HIV who wants kids
« on: April 07, 2007, 11:26:06 PM »
I want to have kids and I have HIV and Gay how?

Offline milker

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  • Protected phone sex
Re: Gay with HIV who wants kids
« Reply #1 on: April 07, 2007, 11:29:05 PM »
Well tell us a bit more about your life, are you living with someone? A female or a male? What's your background? Why do you want a kid?

mid-dec: stupid ass
mid-jan: seroconversion
mid-feb: poz
mar 07: cd4 432 (35%) vl 54000
may 07: cd4 399 (28%) vl 27760
jul 07: cd4 403 (26%) vl 99241
oct 07: cd4 353 (24%) vl 29993
jan 08: cd4 332 (26%) vl 33308
mar 08: cd4 392 (23%) vl 75548
jun 08: cd4 325 (27%) vl 45880
oct 08: cd4 197 (20%) vl 154000 <== aids diagnosis
nov 2 08 start Atripla
nov 30 08: cd4 478 (23%) vl 1880 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
feb 19 09: cd4 398 (24%) vl 430 getting there!
apr 23 09: cd4 604 (29%) vl 50 woohoo :D :D
jul 30 09: cd4 512 (29%) vl undetectable :D :D
may 27 10: cd4 655 (32%) vl undetectable :D :D

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Offline nyreddgemini

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Re: Gay with HIV who wants kids
« Reply #2 on: April 07, 2007, 11:39:08 PM »
well I am Gay no longer in a relationship. But I always wanted to have kids
30yrs Blk and Rican and just would like to have kids

Offline joyluckclub

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  • Posts: 136
Re: Gay with HIV who wants kids
« Reply #3 on: April 09, 2007, 12:41:10 AM »
I'd like to have kids.  Many things would have to come into place before I would make that step.
"Honey, be who you is"  Madea.........

Offline puertorico2006

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Re: Gay with HIV who wants kids
« Reply #4 on: April 09, 2007, 03:42:07 AM »
have you thought about adopting? (a good option but difficult sometimes when single)

if you found a women willing to be arificially inseminated you could do a "sperm wash" to clean out the HIV , but finding a woman willing to have a child for someone they arent in a relationship might be a problem (but not impossible)

I wouldnt mind having a kid someday myself either but past 30 and when im at a different stage in my life.....but ill settle for a nephew or niece lol  ;D
Infected Probably: may 2005
Diagnosed: 11/2006

11/28/2006 CD4:309 / VL: 1907 No meds yet
12/27/2006 CD4:339/  VL:1649 No meds yet
  4/28/2007 CD4:550/  VL:1800 No meds :-)

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Gay with HIV who wants kids
« Reply #5 on: April 09, 2007, 08:06:56 AM »
My, what steps have you taken so far to explore the possibilities? Are you talking about wanting to have only your own children biologically or would you consider adopting?

Are your circumstances financially and otherwise appropriate for starting a family?

Tell us more about yourself and your situation. That way you can more informed responses.

Andy Velez

Offline GSOgymrat

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  • HIV+ since 1993. Relentlessly gay.
Re: Gay with HIV who wants kids
« Reply #6 on: April 09, 2007, 10:11:19 AM »
I don't know why anyone would choose to be a single parent. You would need a LOT of support from family and/or friends or a lot of money to pay for childcare. It is a hard road.

Offline Oceanbeach

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Re: Gay with HIV who wants kids
« Reply #7 on: April 11, 2007, 06:47:52 PM »
I thought I wanted a child with my first bf.  Then I started thinking what that child would look like with Brian's hairline and my original nose.  ;D

Went to Mexico with my last bf.  Met with an Attorney in one of the border towns about adoption.  This was 7 or 8 years ago and the cost for adoption was about $10,000.00 USD. 

One of our friends got two baby boys from unwed teenage mothers.  They have a full-time live-in nanny.  He paid the mother's medical care, the adoption fees, the legal fees and what else, I do not know but... He and the boys have a very happy life. 

My sister (who is not gay and does not have HIV, went to one of those "under priviledged" countries once to adopt a boy and a girl.  She saw the conditions those children were living in and not knowing the medical history of the parents, families, etc., etc., she changed her mind but sends money every month to one of those Christian "sponsorship" organizations.

I guess the point I am making is, with enough money, you can do anything but, can you guarantee to that child that you will be there to see him/her through school?  Have the best day

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Gay with HIV who wants kids
« Reply #8 on: April 11, 2007, 06:57:36 PM »
I guess the point I am making is, with enough money, you can do anything but, can you guarantee to that child that you will be there to see him/her through school?  Have the best day

There isn't a parent alive, hiv positive or hiv negative, who can guarantee that. Too many proverbial buses on the roads.

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline jimw

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Re: Gay with HIV who wants kids
« Reply #9 on: April 12, 2007, 12:00:30 PM »
Me too.  My neighbors at the beach, two wonderful lesbians, had one by turkey baster and adoped a scond one.  I would love to have one by doing sperm washing, but adoption is probably the best bet for me.  I have been doing some research on children with HIV in Russia that need adoption.  But if I adopt, it will have to be soon, and even outside the US it is nearly impossible for a single gay HIV positive man to adopt, but where there is a will there is a way.  I say go for it.  Jim


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