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Author Topic: POZ Relationship  (Read 2575 times)

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Offline RevMC

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POZ Relationship
« on: March 11, 2007, 01:02:26 AM »
Well, well, well. . .

Louie and I just celebrated out 10'th anniversary of being together on Friday (3/9).

I've read posts from others who are looking for love or wondering about dating/relationships and being poz.

I just recently celebrated my 19'th anniversary/birthday of being HIV+  (WOW, 19 yrs already!)

Louie and I met one night while I was a drinker.  There were only a few of us at the bar and he was working in the leather shop.  We kept eyeing each other and the bartender wanted some excitement so he dared us to make out.  Well that's all it took.  Besides I was pretty drunk anyway but WOW what a night.  He thought I was hot, even though I was drunk off my ass and of course I thought he was too.

Since that night we have rarely been apart.  We just couldn't get enough of each other.  By the end of June that year we moved in together.  By September we bought a house.  Yeah I know, things happened quickly but we just knew we were meant to be together.

Now don't get me wrong, it wasn't all nice and sweet.  We had our fights and arguments, said some nasty things to each other and almost broke up a few times.  Even had the silent treatment towards each other until one of us gave in.  There have been good times, and bad ones.  We had my mother living with us for awhile as well as his sister and her 2 kids all within the first 4 years of our relationship.  We had the open relationship, play parties (we were well known around town for our parties), and Louie got messed up with meth, I was a zombie on Paxil for awhile when my mom was sick.  Still we stood by each other no matter what.

Any relationship is not easy, being HIV+ or having AIDS just adds a bit more to the mix.  Doctor appointments, hospital visits, tests, mood swings, drug side affects, preparations for the end that seems to be near, on and on it goes.  But through it all we held on to each other, and still do.

Though we haven't been intimate with each other in 4 long years, we still love each other after all this time.  He sleeps on the couch (his choice) and me in the bed.  He's up and down all night and doesn't want to wake me unless he has to.

Guess you could say we are a rarity in the gay community, most relationships barely make it 1 yr.  Though we know of some couples who have been together over 30 yrs.

The key to ANY lasting relationship, wether it be a heterosexual couple or a gay couple is honesty from the VERY beginning, and open communication.  If  you are HIV+ and single, do not think "I'll tell him/her my status sometime, I love him/her and want to see if they do too".  Tell them from the beginning, no matter what.  I know it's not easy, been there, done that.

It's what's on the inside (personality, etc. . .) that really counts.  Yes, looks play a part in it, but honesty IS the best way to go.  If they like you for you they will try to figure a way to deal with the HIV issue if they are neg.  Besides you never know, they may be POZ too!!  When Louie and I met, I told him that I was POZ, he said "So what, so am I"!  And the rest is history!

For those of you who are single, may you find your soul mate, life partner, lover. For those of you who are in a new relationship,  hang in there, it may be a bumpy ride, but WHAT A RIDE it will be!

Here's to my lover, my life, my soul mate, my husband, may we have many more wonderful up and down years together.  It's been one hell of a ride so far HIV and all!

Part of my story: "Sale Of A Lifetime" POZ December 2003

Started on Truvada and Viramune on 2/15/07

Jan 8, 2007   t-cells 215  Viral Load 10,000  24%
March 26'th  T-cells 306   Viral Load  UNDETECTABLE
June 2007 t-cells 375 Viral Load UNDETECTABLE
August 2007 t-cells 290 Viral Load UNDETECTABLE

Love and Light and Reiki sent your way,
Rev. Michae

Offline GSOgymrat

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  • HIV+ since 1993. Relentlessly gay.
Re: POZ Relationship
« Reply #1 on: March 11, 2007, 01:54:46 AM »
Congratulations on your 10 year anniversary! Nice to hear you have such a great relationship.

Offline Robert

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Re: POZ Relationship
« Reply #2 on: March 11, 2007, 04:30:35 AM »
what a beautiful devotional.  Congratulations!


Offline Ann

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Re: POZ Relationship
« Reply #3 on: March 11, 2007, 02:17:43 PM »
Happy Anniversary to you both! And here's to ten, twenty, what the hell.... THIRTY more!

Anniversary hugs,
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline bear60

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Re: POZ Relationship
« Reply #4 on: March 11, 2007, 03:16:26 PM »
Congratulations on your ten years together!!!!
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline Longislander

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Re: POZ Relationship
« Reply #5 on: March 11, 2007, 09:26:14 PM »
Happy Anniversary!! Great read, thank you. ;D
infected 10/05 diagnosed 12-05
2/06   379/57000                    6/07 372/30500 25%   4/09 640/U/32% 
5/06   ?? /37000                     8/07 491/55000/24%    9/09 913/U/39%
8/06   349/9500 25%              11/07 515/68000/24     2/10 845/U/38%
9/06   507/16,000 30% !          2/08  516/116k/22%    7/10 906/80/39%
12/06 398/29000 26%             Start Atripla 3/08
3/07   402/80,000 29%            4/08  485/undet!/27
4/07   507/35,000 25%            7/08 625/UD/34%
                                                 11/08 684/U/36%

Offline Teresa

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Re: POZ Relationship
« Reply #6 on: March 11, 2007, 09:29:29 PM »

Wishing you many, many more!

Hubby HIV+ 5/5/06
  %: 26.7
 VL: <20
Atripla (started it 8/24/06)

Offline AlanBama

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Re: POZ Relationship
« Reply #7 on: March 11, 2007, 10:15:50 PM »
Happy Anniversary!   


"Remember my sentimental friend that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by others." - The Wizard of Oz

Offline allopathicholistic

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Re: POZ Relationship
« Reply #8 on: March 13, 2007, 09:56:12 AM »
beautiful post. thank you and may love continue to rule in your lives honey

Offline mjmel

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Re: POZ Relationship
« Reply #9 on: March 13, 2007, 11:09:41 AM »
Sweet! Congrats to you both for hanging in there.

Offline marc11864

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Re: POZ Relationship
« Reply #10 on: March 13, 2007, 05:34:53 PM »
I promise not to sing...  ;D

Happy Anniversary though!
Let us cavort like the Greeks of old! You know the ones I mean.

Offline northernguy

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Re: POZ Relationship
« Reply #11 on: March 13, 2007, 08:54:16 PM »
All the best on your anniversary.  Thanks for the reminders on what it takes to keep a relationship working.
Apr 28/06 cd4 600 vl 10,600 cd% 25
Nov 8/09 cd4 510 vl 49,5000 cd% 16
Jan 16/10 cd4 660 vl 54,309 cd% 16
Feb 17/10 Started Atripla
Mar 7/10 cd4 710 vl 1,076 cd% 21
Apr 18/10 cd4 920 vl 268 cd% 28
Jun 19/10 cd4 450 vl 60 cd% 25
Aug 15/10 cd4 680 vl 205 cd% 27
Apr 3/11 cd4 780 vl <40 cd% 30
Jul 17/11 cd4 960 vl <40 cd%33
April 15/12 cd4 1,010 vl <40 cd% 39
April 20/12 Switched to Viramune + Truvada
Aug 2/12 cd4 1040, vl <40, cd% 38
Oct 19 cd4 1,110 vl <40 cd% 41

Offline Val

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  • Praxitèles -- Satyre au repos
Re: POZ Relationship
« Reply #12 on: March 15, 2007, 05:23:14 PM »
This is a wonderful  "déclaration d'amour" that you have  posted!  Best wishes for you and Louie from a guy who has been in the same relatonship now for more than 23 years.   And understands just about everything that you wrote!

Arthus Bertrand
Ali Mahdavi
Richard de Chazal
Daniel Nassoy
The word comes from the Greek words φως phos ("light"), and γραφίς graphis ("stylus", "paintbrush") or γραφή graphê, together meaning "drawing with light" or "representation by means of lines".


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