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Welcome to the POZ Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning:  Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

  • The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own physician.

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Recent Posts

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Am I Infected? / Re: HIV Risk?
« Last post by Wade on Today at 08:29:43 AM »
Hi ,
I have read all your concerns and nothing you have mentioned was risk for HIV.
The virus is transmitted through unprotected anal and vaginal intercourse,
you were protected with a condom.  Body fluids are not infectious once exposed to air so your other concerns were not risks either.  You have NOT had risk.
If these were your only worries it is safe for you to move on.

Best, Wade

To avoid infection,
You need to be using condoms for all anal and vaginal intercourse until you are in a trusting monogamous relationship and both have been tested for all STIs and HIV.
Everyone who is sexually active should have an annual exam and test for all STIs and HIV ,and always after unprotected intercourse. Always using condoms will give you peace of mind your tests will return with a negative result.

Am I Infected? / HIV Risk?
« Last post by jack9322 on Today at 08:05:21 AM »
Hi just want to say thank you in advance for taking the time out of your day to read this. For about 2 years now I've had encounters with 7 escorts 4 times I had protected sex with no skin contact. I always made sure never to make skin contact and was very gentle during intercourse. Everytime I finished which was usually quick due to anxiety levels, I checked the condom briefly and I didn't see any damage at all. One time when I removed the condom about 1 minute later I scratched my eye my hand was dry I'm not sure if this was a risk due to not washing my hands after removing the condom.  Another time I pulled off the condom like an idiot,  I'm not sure if this was a risk either the outside part of the condom did not come next to my uretha. There was one woman who wanted to go on top of me and for me to kiss her body so I did I gently kissed parts of her body including her nipple but didn't kiss anything below her waist I didn't suck on them but I am paranoid that could be a risk and also her vagina might have touched my penis I don't remember it happening though there was definitely no insertion. Lastly about 2 weeks ago I went to an upscale escort in the city and we had sex for about 5 minutes after I came I continued for about 30 seconds I wasn't fully  erect so the condom may have slipped up by half an inch or so but was not loose and did not slip off at any time.. the rest of my encounters were receiving oral with a condom on which I don't believe to be a risk at all. If you were me would you get tested for stds if you made no skin to skin contact and you always used a condom that you checked afterwards ?  I havent been sick in 12 years im a circumsized 22 yo male I'm just paranoid and really guilty, it really had a terrible mental effect on me I finally started dating again due to my acne finally being cured and I don't know if I'm being paranoid about these situations or not should I be worried?  I tried finding oraquick to test myself on a couple ocasions but no stores carry it anymore around here, and I'm to scared to test at the doctors it takes way to long to get the results , but if you think I should based on these encounters I will. Has anyone on here with this sort of anxiety after seeing an escort using a condom ever tested positive
Am I Infected? / Re: My living hell for the past 8 months. And I'm a doc.
« Last post by Wade on Today at 08:00:41 AM »
I agree with Jim, risk of HIV from a condom break for the insertive partner is low
but a risk just the same.  Testing was advised.
If this was your only concern and last exposure you can go get tested now
and have a conclusive result

Best , Wade
Questions About Treatment & Side Effects / Re: Toxic Effects of NRTIs
« Last post by Mishma on Today at 06:21:59 AM »
My bad for not enabling notifications on the original post so I apologize, once again, for the untimely response to your concerns or questions.

Meech and Harleymc: Thanks

Jim: I agree that self experimenting with dosages and medication is not recommended or necessarily wise-but patients are doing it all the time-mostly due to the side of effects of their medications and something I had never done until this "fiasco."

I've been involved with clinical trials as a researcher so I'm not your "everyday" patient and believe me I would add another drug IF we had something to go on. My doc is good with my decision(after the fact)-so he's not completely out of the loop.

Our collective decision is to continuously monitor the virus and if and when it ever reaches 500 copies, we'll do the assay in order to determine if I can add the CCR5 receptor blocker to the mix, especially after recent work has demonstrated it's efficacy in the cognition department-a place where I need some help.   

Am I Infected? / Re: Swollen lymph nodes??
« Last post by JimDublin on Today at 03:52:26 AM »

If you post outside of your thread again it will lead to a ban.
You have been warned.

Fingering someone is not an independent HIV transmission risk, please move on.


Am I Infected? / Re: Swollen lymph nodes??
« Last post by RealAlJufairi on Today at 03:42:55 AM »
Just to be curios, what lymph nodes swell in ARS, do they all swell.
Questions About Treatment & Side Effects / Re: Toxic Effects of NRTIs
« Last post by JimDublin on Today at 03:41:56 AM »
@ Anyone reading this thread, Ill just add if you are unhappy with your combination please work with your Doctor to find solutions, HIV medication has come a very long way over the years and self experimenting with dosing and medication at this stage is just not the answer. I changed from Tivicay / Truvada to a different combination, Triumeq so dropping the Truvada, does my incidental experience mean Truvada is bad, No and it works perfectly fine for people all over the world daily.

At the end of the day it is up to you what you do or do not take.
All I can do is hope you will be okay.

Best of luck.

Questions About Treatment & Side Effects / Re: Toxic Effects of NRTIs
« Last post by harleymc on Today at 03:39:09 AM »
"I am highlighting this to draw attention to the shitty world some of us live in where a person with a life threatening disease for over 30 years, and surviving, has a shitty doctor."

Questions About Treatment & Side Effects / Re: Toxic Effects of NRTIs
« Last post by mecch on Today at 03:20:04 AM »
I am sure I greatly benefited from this class of drugs-up to a point, but the current guidelines, and my own physician's ineptitude led me to take matters into my own hands and drop the Truvada-

I am highlighting this to draw attention to the shitty world some of us live in where a person with a life threatening disease for over 30 years, and surviving, has a shitty doctor.

Living With HIV / Re: Mixed status relationship
« Last post by mecch on Today at 03:15:34 AM »

Should we get him on pep?
Do an early detection test?

I'm just scared I will infect him.
He's been so great in helping through this time of my diagnosis
I fear I will lose him because of hiv
I fear that the risk of being with me will eventually make him leave

I've read so many articles about mixed status couples and undetectable vl sex
I want to trust the studies but it's hard to do so without a constant worry
Anyone been in a situation like mine or have any advice.
I know all about safe sex and whatnot.
Guess I'm just looking to vent my worries and fears
He doesn't seem to be as worried as I am
But maybe he is just hiding it well from me

Your first 2 questions above:

My response is - How about going to doctors in these situations and letting them respond. They are the experts and will answer questions like these with more expertise than strangers on the Internet.

I find that its very very very wise advice - especially people who are newly aware of their HIV - to not stew over things that require medical expert attention.

As for the rest (keeping your relationship)
Best of luck -
have open communication
going to doctors, as discussed above - removes somewhat the weight on the HIV+ person - of what is and is not a "rational" thing for an HIV- person to feel and do in a sero-discordant relationship.

Based on the little you have described, it does sound like he is cool enough being with you.  You have to work on these fears 1) that you will infect, 2) that he might leave you for being HIV+, etc.  These fears could corrode your relationship and that will be on you.
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