minority within minority within minority, and biggest fear!

[egello]

Last night in my awesomely vivid dream, I dreamt that I was somehow involved in murdering the emperor of China because I was carrying a wrong incense stick (yellow instead of cream color), and had to somehow get punished for it. However, luckily, my dad in the dream was some high profile diplomat, and I was diverted to Cambridge while sucking some guy's dick in a pond. Yeah, tell me about it, it was weird and extremely colorful and vivid. The set was amazing with lots of Chinese red, decor and design with bright Emperor's yellow.

You konw, while I was growing up, my two biggest fears were 1) getting HIV 2) Having to go to jail for a crime I actually committed. Now, that one fear has come true with my final acceptance of HIV, I have this fear that my 2nd biggest fear will somehow come true.

Also, I feel like I got it pretty bad. Sure not as bad as some others, but pretty bad. As if being a racial minority wasn't bad enough, I also grew up to become a sexual minority that is hated, and if that wasn't bad enough, now with AIDS, so whats next?? Permanent disability? Having to go to jail? or possibly be exacuted? Scary......

Does anyone else feel this way, somehow?

[Longislander]

not really. It did cross my mind about having to deal with being gay back when, and now I get to deal with the inner minority (as you stated). But it has passed.

I hope when my meds start, I get to have these dreams!!