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Off Topic Forums => Off Topic Forum => Topic started by: Rev. Moon on May 15, 2011, 01:00:29 pm

Title: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 15, 2011, 01:00:29 pm
This crazy ass church has placed over 3000 billboards like the one below (1200 in the US and 2000 around the world) announcing that the end of the world begins next Saturday (http://www.npr.org/2011/05/07/136053462/is-the-end-nigh-well-know-soon-enough) (heading towards complete destruction on October 21st of this year).

Is this disgusting or what?  3000 billboards times whatever many thousands of dollars that it may cost to purchase these spaces on a monthly basis.  This money could have been donated to worthy causes, but instead they have chosen to force this garbage upon us for the past year or so.  Down here in South Florida we have this crap towering along the highways every so often. 

So what will y'all be doing this week since next weekend is the beginning of the end?  I can't decide on whether is should retire to a monastery in search of peace and forgiveness or move down to Brazil and spend the next few months in absolute debauchery.

(http://i812.photobucket.com/albums/zz42/livebythemoon/a545c303.png)


Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 15, 2011, 01:02:31 pm
Ooops! (http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=37918.0) OneTampa beat your ass to it, my friend! :D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 15, 2011, 01:04:44 pm
Ooops! (http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=37918.0) OneTampa beat your ass to it, my friend! :D

RevMoonFAIL
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 15, 2011, 01:21:29 pm
RevMoonFAIL

Aw, we luvs ya anywho. :-*
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: drewm on May 15, 2011, 01:37:19 pm
In reality, those of us who believe the scriptures understand that no one knows when He will return so yes, this money could have and should have been spent on something worthwhile.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: thunter34 on May 15, 2011, 01:58:53 pm
I'm wondering if I could use this as an excuse to walk around town naked on the 21st....tell 'em I want to leave this world the way I came in and meet my maker the way he made me.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: drewm on May 15, 2011, 02:09:57 pm
I'm wondering if I could use this as an excuse to walk around town naked on the 21st....tell 'em I want to leave this world the way I came in and meet my maker the way he made me.

I don't see why not LOL!!!!  :D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 15, 2011, 02:19:51 pm
I'm wondering if I could use this as an excuse to walk around town naked on the 21st....tell 'em I want to leave this world the way I came in and meet my maker the way he made me.

Pictars or it never happened!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on May 15, 2011, 02:25:37 pm
Pictars or it never happened!

I second that motion  :-X
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: thunter34 on May 15, 2011, 02:30:30 pm
Pictars or it never happened!

So there are still forum members here who doubt that I might?
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 15, 2011, 02:33:52 pm
So there are still forum members here who doubt that I might?

No, we just wanna see your junk (again) ;D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 15, 2011, 02:34:33 pm
So there are still forum members here who doubt that I might?

Seein' is believin'! ;D

I should have been born in the "Show Me" state.

No, we just wanna see your junk again  ;D

Yeah, what da Rev said.  :)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: thunter34 on May 15, 2011, 02:50:55 pm
No, we just wanna see your junk (again) ;D

Oh, just ask Miss Philicia.  I think she has it on file.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Dachshund on May 15, 2011, 04:20:04 pm
I'm wondering if I could use this as an excuse to walk around town naked on the 21st....tell 'em I want to leave this world the way I came in and meet my maker the way he made me.

It's never stopped you before.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 15, 2011, 04:31:42 pm
I wonder if the whole rapture thing will be like being beamed up on Star Trek?  That would be so cool.

On another note, haven't they figured out that their planned day of rapture occurs on the sabbath --- Me thinks the rapture activity would be considered work, thus, I don't see it happening - now, maybe on Sunday - but that is the finale of Celebrity Apprentice (Part 2 of the two part finale) and don't see it happening during that either - maybe Monday --- does anyone know if there are any season finale's on that evening?  I just don't see it happeniing during sweeps month on tv --- the network execs are too powerfuil - then again, I guess an event like the rapture might also have high ratings - still don't know if it would beat out Celebrity Apprentice, American Idol, or Dancin with the Stars (at least not among many gay viewer demographics)

I really think there needs to be more planning into this whole rapture thing - requires a better marketing crew (I mean those billboards really aren't as attention getting as they could be), their publicist needs to be replaced as pre-event promo has really been lacking --- and who plans a rapture on a Saturday evening in May?  Geesh!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 15, 2011, 04:51:43 pm
(http://winningateverything.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/advice.jpg)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 15, 2011, 04:58:25 pm
I wonder if the whole rapture thing will be like being beamed up on Star Trek?  That would be so cool.


umm, dont worry, you'll never know. You'll be stuck down here on earth with us heathens and the plaques and such.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 15, 2011, 05:10:20 pm
.

On another note, haven't they figured out that their planned day of rapture occurs on the sabbath --- Me thinks the rapture activity would be considered work, thus, I don't see it happening - now, maybe on Sunday - but that is the finale of Celebrity Apprentice (Part 2 of the two part finale) and don't see it happening during that either - maybe Monday --- does anyone know if there are any season finale's on that evening?  I just don't see it happeniing during sweeps month on tv --- the network execs are too powerfuil - then again, I guess an event like the rapture might also have high ratings - still don't know if it would beat out Celebrity Apprentice, American Idol, or Dancin with the Stars (at least not among many gay viewer demographics)


I'm just glad that it didn't happen this weekend. I woulda been really pissed if I had to miss the season finale of Survivor: Redemption Island (shitty as this season has been I still wanna see the expression on Boston Rob's face when he doesn't win the million bucks). 
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 15, 2011, 05:15:58 pm
umm, dont worry, you'll never know. You'll be stuck down here on earth with us heathens and the plaques and such.
Dayummmm!  And I was hoping the whole AMG Cookbook thing would have bought me salvation!  Shit.... can I get a refund ;D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: mecch on May 15, 2011, 05:40:45 pm
I'll probably just continue as is, hoping for a reprieve before that final day. 
Afterall, HIV wasn't the end of the world for me either.  Still have to bring home the fucking bacon and be nice to babies, dogs, and old ladies on the street.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Dachshund on May 15, 2011, 05:51:44 pm
Oh, just ask Miss Philicia.  I think she has it on file.

By the by, youth pastor Tim has a very purty peenie.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 15, 2011, 06:19:02 pm
I woulda been really pissed if I had to miss the season finale of Survivor: Redemption Island

PRE-ach sista! Besides, God would never let us down like that.

Dayummmm!  And I was hoping the whole AMG Cookbook thing would have bought me salvation!

You only purchased $90 worth, salvation is gained at the $100 level. Sorry.

By the by, youth pastor Tim has a very purty peenie.

Since I missed the first release of T's Peenie, I will expect to see a copy in my PM today.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 15, 2011, 06:53:46 pm

Since I missed the first release of T's Peenie, I will expect to see a copy in my PM today.

It was available only at a certain "dating" website.  Quite the beauty I must say.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Dachshund on May 15, 2011, 06:58:40 pm
It was available only at a certain "dating" website.  Quite the beauty I must say.
 

pretty and pink
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 15, 2011, 07:02:31 pm
Aye, but turtle-neck or helmet?








and why the fuck did I never get that particular IMG memo? >:(
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 15, 2011, 07:05:59 pm
Aye, but turtle-neck or helmet?

I just remember a very delightful cockring and a bootay made in heaven.  He really had me at hello.

 
pretty and pink

(http://i812.photobucket.com/albums/zz42/livebythemoon/704e7c30.jpg)

thank you!   ;D

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: anniebc on May 15, 2011, 07:07:23 pm
RevMoonFAIL

Rev Moon fail...never, a bit slow perhaps  but never a failure.

BTW I'd go for the Debauchery in Brazil, and take Miss P with you...Monasteries are so boring.

Aroha
Jan :-*
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: anniebc on May 15, 2011, 07:16:00 pm


and why the fuck did I never get that particular IMG memo? >:(

Ann I think it's a man thing, (I mean the IMG not the willy) I didn't get anything either... ;)

Aroha
Jan :-*
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Dachshund on May 15, 2011, 07:17:37 pm
Aye, but turtle-neck or helmet?








and why the fuck did I never get that particular IMG memo? >:(

Don't play coy with me Miss Thing. You've seen that Georgia peach.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 15, 2011, 07:23:02 pm
Don't play coy with me Miss Thing. You've seen that Georgia peach.


Well dang it all, if I did, it must have fallen out one of those many holes in my head. :(
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 15, 2011, 07:23:11 pm
Ann I think it's a man thing, (I mean the IMG not the willy) I didn't get anything either... ;)

Aroha
Jan :-*

Somebody's fibbing  ;)


Rev Moon fail...never, a bit slow perhaps  but never a failure.

BTW I'd go for the Debauchery in Brazil, and take Miss P with you...Monasteries are so boring.

Aroha
Jan :-*

Luff ya  :-*

And yah, I'm taking my evil sister with me to Fortaleza.  We'll be more infamous than the Borgias.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 15, 2011, 07:29:16 pm
In reality, those of us who believe the scriptures understand that no one knows when He will return so yes, this money could have and should have been spent on something worthwhile.

So what's the Bible say about fisting?  I've always been curious.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 15, 2011, 07:31:25 pm
Rev Moon fail...never, a bit slow perhaps  but never a failure.

BTW I'd go for the Debauchery in Brazil, and take Miss P with you...Monasteries are so boring.

Aroha
Jan :-*

Sounds like a good time to pimp for Mister Brasil 2011! (http://twitpic.com/4y3uib/full)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 15, 2011, 07:32:11 pm
So what's the Bible say about fisting?  I've always been curious.

If I recall correctly from my lessons as a child it is considered kosher.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 15, 2011, 07:36:00 pm
Sounds like a good time to pimp for Mister Brasil 2011! (http://twitpic.com/4y3uib/full)

Holy Hell! So many impure thoughts are racing through my mind right now...oh well screw it, I'm definitly not gonna be sucked up into the light next saturday. I think I shall now go touch myself.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: anniebc on May 15, 2011, 07:38:15 pm
Sounds like a good time to pimp for Mister Brasil 2011! (http://twitpic.com/4y3uib/full)

Nice teeth.... :D

Aroha
Jan :-*
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 15, 2011, 07:41:52 pm
Nice teeth.... :D

Aroha
Jan :-*
The nicest teeth I've ever cum come across ----- Couldn't resist  ;D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: anniebc on May 15, 2011, 07:50:05 pm
The nicest teeth I've ever cum come across ----- Couldn't resist  ;D

Just choked on my lunch time cuppa... :D

Aroha
Jan :-*
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 15, 2011, 07:51:04 pm
The nicest teeth I've ever cum come across ----- Couldn't resist  ;D

Were you reading my facebook wall just now?  (see what you're missing, Wumpy?)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 15, 2011, 07:53:16 pm
The nicest teeth I've ever cum come across ----- Couldn't resist  ;D

Nasty girl.   Now you've definitely undone whatever good that those recipe books may have done for ya.

Thank you for the nice wallpaper, Philicia.

(http://i812.photobucket.com/albums/zz42/livebythemoon/e4673d7a.png)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Raf on May 15, 2011, 07:56:26 pm
Damn, saturday?? why saturday?? I want to see american idol finale the other week!! (and yeah, don't you dare to tell me about who gets the boot...the show is 1 week delayed here in south america).
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 15, 2011, 08:00:09 pm
Damn, saturday?? why saturday?? I want to see american idol finale the other week!! (and yeah, don't you dare to tell me about who gets the boot...the show is 1 week delayed here in south america).

Don't waste your time, boo.  Haley, the girl who errbody seems to hate, will be the winnah.  That's how angry our Lord Jebus is at this sinful world.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: OneTampa on May 15, 2011, 08:01:50 pm
A guy in line at the grocery talked about this upcoming biblically historic event.

He said that the Right Reverend at this church informed the congregation that everyone should be sure to check their Rapture tickets, that will automatically appear on their person before travel, and look for the codes next to their names:  

AH (Ascend to Heaven)
DH (Descend to Hell)

 ;)

P.S. I didn't know that the Glorious Rapture Committee had an IT Department.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: denb45 on May 15, 2011, 08:04:45 pm
If I recall correctly from my lessons as a child it is considered kosher.

Well of course it is, you can't get teh AIDS or any STDs for the hand or any fingers, kosher and very SAFE too, if you know what your doing  ;)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Raf on May 15, 2011, 08:06:43 pm
Don't waste your time, boo.  Haley, the girl who errbody seems to hate, will be the winnah.  That's how angry our Lord Jebus is at this sinful world.

Now THAT'S an ugly revenge on us the sinners  :(
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 15, 2011, 08:10:20 pm
Well of course it is, you can't get teh AIDS or any STDs for the hand or any fingers, kosher and very SAFE too, if you know what your doing  ;)

Many of the heads at Am I Infected? will beg to differ  ;). 


He said that the Right Reverend at this church informed the congregation that everyone should be sure to check their Rapture tickets, that will automatically appear on their person before travel, and look for the codes next to their names: 

AH (Ascend to Heaven)
DH (Descend to Hell)


If I am to hang out for eternity with the members of that congregation I then need to be really evil this week.  Fuck that shit.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: denb45 on May 15, 2011, 08:10:45 pm
u mean teh AIDS wasn't enough punishment for all of us sinners & fornicators  ;D

Oh Wait, fuck that, SHIT I'm still ALIVE  :D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 15, 2011, 08:19:42 pm
Nasty girl.   Now you've definitely undone whatever good that those recipe books may have done for ya.

Thank you for the nice wallpaper, Philicia.

(http://i812.photobucket.com/albums/zz42/livebythemoon/e4673d7a.png)


I've moved on to Mister Brasil's runner up Murilo

(http://i1007.photobucket.com/albums/af197/bedstuy65/Screenshot2011-05-15at81734PM.png)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: CaptCarl on May 15, 2011, 10:12:33 pm
one of those many holes in my head. :(

Look at it his way: The more holes in your head, the easier it is to get your brains fucked out!! ;)

CaptCarl
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 15, 2011, 10:40:33 pm
Were you reading my facebook wall just now?  (see what you're missing, Wumpy?)
just saw it --- LOL
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: tednlou2 on May 15, 2011, 11:40:55 pm
"The View" co-host, Sherri Shephard talked about this.  She said when the rapture was predicted before, she ran up all her credit cards and passed bad checks.  She once said the world was flat, only to say she misspoke on the next show.  So, we know she isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer, but she isn't a complete idiot.  I just don't understand how people with some I.Q. believe this stuff. 

If you tell people you are an athiest or agnostic, most look at you as if you're the one with some mental problem.  I'm not knocking anyone's faith, but it should be the other way around.  If you believe the Bible literally (men living inside whales, Noah's Ark, we all came from Adam and Eve, the virgin birth story that had been used several times before by other religions, etc), then you should be the one people look at with great concern.  But, we live in a country where the majority believe in the Bible's version of creation and deny evolution exists.     
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: drewm on May 16, 2011, 12:10:08 am
"I just don't understand how people with some I.Q. believe this stuff. "

It defies explanation which is why it's called faith.

1.  Confident belief in the truth, value, or trustworthiness of a person, idea, or thing.

2.  Belief that does not rest on logical proof or material evidence.

Doesn't make me wrong, means we disagree. That's all  ;)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 16, 2011, 12:45:05 am

It defies explanation which is why it's called faith.

Doesn't make me wrong, means we disagree. That's all  ;)


C'mon Drew, as religious as you may be I cannot picture you believing in the central topic for this thread (that our good ol' G_d is going to wipe us out starting next Sabbath) or some other fundamentalist stuff such as creationist rhetoric and so on.  I don't say this disrespectfully, I just have a hard time swallowing that possibility.

And yes I said swallow.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: bocker3 on May 16, 2011, 07:49:40 am
I'm just glad that it didn't happen this weekend. I woulda been really pissed if I had to miss the season finale of Survivor: Redemption Island (shitty as this season has been I still wanna see the expression on Boston Rob's face when he doesn't win the million bucks). 

Well, I guess you are ready for your judgement now -- He had a pretty good expression on his face when he DID win the million.  Idiots should have kicked his ass off early -- just like Russell's.  Of course, the fact that Phillip actually got ONE VOTE makes the Rapture seem much more possible now.

M
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 16, 2011, 07:57:34 am
"The View" co-host, Sherri Shephard talked about this.   

I once had a date with a guy that did hair for The View and that tired queen mopped a pricey plum colored TSE cashmere sweater from my apartment.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 16, 2011, 08:01:57 am
Well, I guess you are ready for your judgement now -- He had a pretty good expression on his face when he DID win the million.  Idiots should have kicked his ass off early -- just like Russell's.  Of course, the fact that Phillip actually got ONE VOTE makes the Rapture seem much more possible now.

M

Such a travesty.  These people had no brain. This season should have been called "Amber's Man Gets a Million Dollaz".  I detest Boston Rob, but those idiots proved that none of them deserved the win.

And a vote for "Phile" (as that moron who voted for him spelled it) is definitely a sign of armageddon. I'm buying my tickets to Brazil today.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 16, 2011, 08:04:56 am
I'm buying my tickets to Brazil today.

Please upgrade my ticket to first class

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MxDDarp7cKM
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 16, 2011, 08:16:50 am
Please upgrade my ticket to first class

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MxDDarp7cKM

Of course, gurl.  We can't be mingling with the hoi polloi.  And our wealth was not given to us by some aging sugar daddy.   

Mimosas and caipirinhas here we come.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 16, 2011, 08:40:35 am
Of course, gurl.  We can't be mingling with the hoi polloi.  And our wealth was not given to us by some aging sugar daddy.   

Mimosas and caipirinhas here we come.

Did you know that caipirnha is derived from the Portuguese equivalent of "hillbilly"?  And I can almost taste the feijoada already.  And the foreskin.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 16, 2011, 09:09:26 am
Did you know that caipirnha is derived from the Portuguese equivalent of "hillbilly"?  And I can almost taste the feijoada already.  And the foreskin.

Yes, and yes.  Oh, and foreskin... hmmm the breakfast of champions (along with a nice 9" chouriço).
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 16, 2011, 10:10:42 am
Look at it his way: The more holes in your head, the easier it is to get your brains fucked out!! ;)

CaptCarl


**LIKES**



And I can almost taste the feijoada already.  And the foreskin.
Yes, and yes.  Oh, and foreskin... hmmm the breakfast of champions (along with a nice 9" chouriço).

Me thinks it must be time for lunch. :)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Assurbanipal on May 16, 2011, 10:34:43 am
"The View" co-host, Sherri Shephard talked about this.  She said when the rapture was predicted before, she ran up all her credit cards and passed bad checks.  ...

Every time I see this thread I wonder if they had to pay the rent on those billboards in advance...
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: denb45 on May 16, 2011, 10:45:07 am
"I just don't understand how people with some I.Q. believe this stuff. "

It defies explanation which is why it's called faith.

1.  Confident belief in the truth, value, or trustworthiness of a person, idea, or thing.

2.  Belief that does not rest on logical proof or material evidence.

Doesn't make me wrong, means we disagree. That's all  ;)

Drewm honey, that is why they are called religious fanatics  ;D you can be very  very smart, and also be very  very dumb too  :D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: woodshere on May 16, 2011, 11:45:07 am
So I wonder if the world is ending on Saturday are they emptying their coffers and helping others have a good last week???
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 16, 2011, 12:17:47 pm
 

 But, we live in a country where the majority believe in the Bible's version of creation and deny evolution exists.      

ahh, interesting.

let me set the tone of my post first...I believe in God.(stay with me here, don't discount this whole post just because I said I believe in God)

My opinion is that if you believe in only one at the exclusion of the other (Creationism or Evolution) you are being narrow minded. In my mind evolution does not contradict the existence of a God. Why couldn't it be perfectly logical that a divine being used evolution as a method to create the world? (OH NOES! I believe in God but I am blasphemizing the Bible!)

I believe the Bible should not be taken literally, that it should be read allegorically. It's is merely a book of stories and is akin to a book of fairy tales, with perhaps only a few threads of truth in it. The Bible was written several years after Jesus death, by people wanting to get their view of the world out there. The stories were picked and chosen by a select few, those of the Catholic church,etc.. with just as many stories thrown out because they didn't gel with their beliefs.

SO let's take the Bible out of the equation, hell let's take Jesus out of the equation, because did he even exist?

I do not need the Bible to prove to me that God exists, nor do I need Jesus to prove to me that God exists. That's not to say I hate the bible, hell I have a copy in my room.

How do I know God exists? I cannot give you concrete proof, I just know it because I feel it in me. Some believers might know what I'm talking about. I don't need creationism to prove it, I don't need a Bible to prove it, I just "know" he exists.

and just because I had a Baptist preacher yelling at me when I was young telling me that homosexuality was a sin, and that drinking and dancing was a sin doesnt mean that I throw the baby out with the bath water. Who the hell is he? Doesnt mean there is not a God.

The only thing about science and the existence of God is this...Science has determined that everything around us, including us, was created by the Big Bang. If you are a nonbeliever perhaps you believe that the Big Bang "just happened", poof! But come on, what caused the Big Bang? If "nothingness" existed before the BB then what created the nothingness? I don't know, but I know all this just didn't "happen".

So , I hope this post has alienated both the Bible Thumpers and the nonbelievers  ;D

As far as the rapture, pfffffft! That's another thing dreamt up by narrow minded Humans. This guys an idiot.


-Will




Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Jeff G on May 16, 2011, 12:40:36 pm
The last few weeks since that horrible tornado here in the south I have been seeing the most peculiar thing on TV , people standing on a pile of rubble that used to be home and treasure thanking god he spared them . I guess these people are the glass half full type .  
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on May 16, 2011, 01:22:35 pm
ahh, interesting.

let me set the tone of my post first...I believe in God.(stay with me here, don't discount this whole post just because I said I believe in God)

My opinion is that if you believe in only one at the exclusion of the other (Creationism or Evolution) you are being narrow minded. In my mind evolution does not contradict the existence of a God. Why couldn't it be perfectly logical that a divine being used evolution as a method to create the world? (OH NOES! I believe in God but I am blasphemizing the Bible!)

I believe the Bible should not be taken literally, that it should be read allegorically. It's is merely a book of stories and is akin to a book of fairy tales, with perhaps only a few threads of truth in it. The Bible was written several years after Jesus death, by people wanting to get their view of the world out there. The stories were picked and chosen by a select few, those of the Catholic church,etc.. with just as many stories thrown out because they didn't gel with their beliefs.

SO let's take the Bible out of the equation, hell let's take Jesus out of the equation, because did he even exist?

I do not need the Bible to prove to me that God exists, nor do I need Jesus to prove to me that God exists. That's not to say I hate the bible, hell I have a copy in my room.

How do I know God exists? I cannot give you concrete proof, I just know it because I feel it in me. Some believers might know what I'm talking about. I don't need creationism to prove it, I don't need a Bible to prove it, I just "know" he exists.

and just because I had a Baptist preacher yelling at me when I was young telling me that homosexuality was a sin, and that drinking and dancing was a sin doesnt mean that I throw the baby out with the bath water. Who the hell is he? Doesnt mean there is not a God.

The only thing about science and the existence of God is this...Science has determined that everything around us, including us, was created by the Big Bang. If you are a nonbeliever perhaps you believe that the Big Bang "just happened", poof! But come on, what caused the Big Bang? If "nothingness" existed before the BB then what created the nothingness? I don't know, but I know all this just didn't "happen".

So , I hope this post has alienated both the Bible Thumpers and the nonbelievers  ;D

As far as the rapture, pfffffft! That's another thing dreamt up by narrow minded Humans. This guys an idiot.


-Will

May as well throw another log onto the fire with this twist:

Renowned physicist Stephen Hawking recently explained (http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/2011/may/15/stephen-hawking-interview-there-is-no-heaven) his belief that there is no God and that humans should therefore seek to live the most valuable lives they can while on Earth.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 16, 2011, 01:47:33 pm
May as well throw another log onto the fire with this twist:

Renowned physicist Stephen Hawking recently explained (http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/2011/may/15/stephen-hawking-interview-there-is-no-heaven) his belief that there is no God and that humans should therefore seek to live the most valuable lives they can while on Earth.

OMG! Nooooooo.  Say it isnt so! Oh the Humanity! Well that solves it, nevermind I no longer believe in a divine being. ::)

*looks up Local chapter of Atheists*


Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 16, 2011, 03:46:50 pm
A part of me believes in G_d.  Heck, I even respect Baby Jebus, Mary the Virgin, some Apostles, and some Saints.

The other part of me believes in Science.

I believe in Nature.

I even believe in (many, if not most) humans.

I however am not very fond of religion, unless you view it from a Social Science or Humanities angle.

So I guess I could see the meaning of Wilhemina's post.

It's good to have the freedom to believe in whatever is best for us from a philosophical standpoint.  The key thing is to never cross that line where you start shoving such philosophies down somebody else's throat.  This foolishness of May 21st and other forms of fundamentalism are expressions of such "shoving" of beliefs, and they are big turn offs even for the most tolerant of us.  
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 16, 2011, 03:51:54 pm
A part of me believes in G_d.  Heck, I even respect Baby Jebus, Mary the Virgin, some Apostles, and some Saints.

... and how did you make this belief choice over, say -- Huitzilopochtli?
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: drewm on May 16, 2011, 03:51:54 pm
C'mon Drew, as religious as you may be I cannot picture you believing in the central topic for this thread (that our good ol' G_d is going to wipe us out starting next Sabbath) or some other fundamentalist stuff such as creationist rhetoric and so on.  I don't say this disrespectfully, I just have a hard time swallowing that possibility.

And yes I said swallow.

Well, you are correct in that I do not believe the rapture is coming this weekend.  ;)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: denb45 on May 16, 2011, 03:57:26 pm
Well, you are correct in that I do not believe the rapture is coming this weekend.  ;)

I'm I the only one in here that likes the devil , and has sold his soul to him 20 yrs ago, come on now, I know I'm NOT the only one who has done this, he still can't have it while I'm still alive tho, that's part of the deal ;D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Dachshund on May 16, 2011, 03:59:15 pm
I'm I the only one in here that likes the devil , and has sold his soul him 20 yrs ago, come on now, I know I'm NOT the only one who has done this ;D

Yes dear, you are.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 16, 2011, 04:08:41 pm
... and how did you make this belief choice over, say -- Huitzilopochtli?

It's funny you should say that.  Did I ever mention to ya that I am supposed to be a child of Itzpapalotl (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Itzpapalotl)?  Oh and I am blessed by Yemanjá (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yemaya).

So many gods and goddesses, such a short life.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 16, 2011, 04:11:22 pm
I'm I the only one in here that likes the devil , and has sold his soul to him 20 yrs ago, come on now, I know I'm NOT the only one who has done this, he still can't have it while I'm still alive tho, that's part of the deal ;D

You're alone on that one, Dennis.  Hope you got some decent money for it and that you haven't spent it all at Walmart  ;)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 16, 2011, 04:17:17 pm
It's funny you should say that.  Did I ever mention to ya that I am supposed to be a child of Itzpapalotl (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Itzpapalotl)?  Oh and I am blessed by Yemanjá (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yemaya).

So many gods and goddesses, such a short life.

Yeah, well let me know when you've been rimmed for three hours by a Santería priest with a live chicken running around in their South Bronx apartment.  Now that is religion.

And Yoruba... girl, need we bring up Nigeria? You know I'm Yoruban by osmosis. Actually if I'm to go by my ex I'd also have half of Muhammad ibn ‘Abdullāh's nutsack floating in my blood, courtesy of his deceased father's clan.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: denb45 on May 16, 2011, 04:20:26 pm
You're alone on that one, Dennis.  Hope you got some decent money for it and that you haven't spent it all at Walmart  ;)

No dear, I didn't get a dime for it, but let's just say that it will be something I'll have to live with for the rest of my life or what's left of it  :-*
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 16, 2011, 04:20:57 pm
I used to teach a workshop on religion and spirituality.  There is a great book called "The Spirituality of Imperfection"  in it there is an example of a teacher who says to his class when asked what spirituality is "those who say do not know, and those who know do not say."  The class asks what he means, to which he replies, "how many of you have ever smelled a rose?"  The whole class raises their hands.  He then says, "Tell me the smell of a rose."  None of the students can tell him. They can tell him what it smells "like" but not the actual smell.  He then says "if you have smelled a rose, you know the smell, it is the same with spirituality - when you got it you know it, but you really can't describe it - thus, those who say do not know and those who know do not say."

Interestingly enough the word religion comes from the word religio which means "to bind up." So, when you have a bunch of beliefs and bind them up, you have religion.  The word spirit means "breath of life." So, if you have a breath of life - by definition you are spiritual - some just may not know it.

I think that there are ways to align science with the bible - in ways that make sense.  Just as an example: if one looks at the theory of creation it can be aligned with science and evolution, to varying degrees.  I also believe that a day to man is a thousand years to the creator - thus if someone literally tries to say the earth is 6,000 years old, based on an interpretation of the bible - I can show where if one day = 1,000 years, then there are 2,190,000 days (365 x 6,000), which then becomes 2,190,000 x 1,000 = 2,190,000,000 (over 2 billion years).  6 "days" of creating the earth would actually be 6,000 years....

Also, the ways that scientists have discovered sediments and fossils is also supported and vice versa by biblical passages - with many scientists believing that if there was a flood of the magnitude described in the bible, it could cause sediment deposits that have been found the way they have (all one has to do is look at the damage and after effects of floods that have happened in our lifetimes on a much much smaller scale).  If it was 40 "days" of flooding - that could translate into 40,000 years.  

I agree with Will that many of the stories in the bible are allegories and many are truths - it is up to the reader to discern, if they so choose. But anywhoooooo....

Most importantly, for all my rambling above, I also believe in each person's right to believe or not believe and to believe in what they choose.  My dad always said the surest way to start an argument is to try to talk religion or politics.  BTW, I almost said I was babbling above - babbling comes from babel - remember the tower of babel - man was building it to try to reach the heavens?  G*d said if man thinks they can do this - which he knew they couldn't actually reach the heavens - how long is it before man thinks he doesn't need me - thus, he destroyed the tower, scattered man about the earth, and scrambled their language so that they would be in conflict and have difficulty coming together as one - so, when someone goes on and on like I am here, we call it babbling. ;D

For all that I said above, I still don't think there will be a rapture this weekend  ;)   And why are there two men standing in my office with white coats on getting ready to take me to what they call "a happy place?"  It is hard to type with this straight jacket they are trying to put on me.....

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Joe K on May 16, 2011, 04:29:13 pm
What troubles me most about religion, is not the particular beliefs so much, as the idea that nonbelievers are somehow "inferior" because they do not share those beliefs. The whole concept of God, is intriguing to me, because I wonder why some people have the need to believe in a higher power. But no matter what I believe, I would never seek to impose my beliefs onto others and I would appreciate it if they would respond in kind. There also seems to be this confusion between what constitutes faith vs. religion. I don't need a religion to tell me why I have faith, as that comes from inside. What I believe, is what I believe and I resent anyone who suggests that I must live by their "moral" code and too often, that code is called religion.

As humans, we are incredibly complex and everyone is born with a moral compass. What you choose to do with that compass, how you decide what and how to nurture it, has more to do with what you believe and it will always remain unique to you. People seem drawn to religion for various reasons and I see nothing wrong in celebrating your religion, in whatever fashion you choose, as long as you leave me and my personal faith alone.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 16, 2011, 04:29:28 pm
Yeah, well let me know when you've been rimmed for three hours by a Santería priest with a live chicken running around in their South Bronx apartment.  Now that is religion.

And Yoruba... girl, need we bring up Nigeria? You know I'm Yoruban by osmosis. Actually if I'm to go by my ex I'd also have half of Muhammad ibn ‘Abdullāh's nutsack floating in my blood, courtesy of his deceased father's clan.

A three hour rim-job?  Damn, gurl.  You must be a sister from the Conclave of the Divine Member.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 16, 2011, 04:31:30 pm
What troubles me most about religion, is not the particular beliefs so much, as the idea that nonbelievers are somehow "inferior" because they do not share those beliefs. The whole concept of God, is intriguing to me, because I wonder why some people have the need to believe in a higher power. But no matter what I believe, I would never seek to impose my beliefs onto others and I would appreciate it if they would respond in kind. There also seems to be this confusion between what constitutes faith vs. religion. I don't need a religion to tell me why I have faith, as that comes from inside. What I believe, is what I believe and I resent anyone who suggests that I must live by their "moral" code and too often, that code is called religion.

As humans, we are incredibly complex and everyone is born with a moral compass. What you choose to do with that compass, how you decide what and how to nurture it, has more to do with what you believe and it will always remain unique to you. People seem drawn to religion for various reasons and I see nothing wrong in celebrating your religion, in whatever fashion you choose, as long as you leave me and my personal faith alone.
Very well said Joe.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 16, 2011, 04:32:25 pm
A three hour rim-job?  Damn, gurl.  You must be a sister from the Conclave of the Divine Member.

He was so delighted with the ass feast that he treated me to cuchifritos after the session.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 16, 2011, 04:36:51 pm
He was so delighted with the ass feast that he treated me to cuchifritos after the session.

Such a gentleman he was. Dang, now I'm the mood for some morcilla and a Maracujá juice.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: denb45 on May 16, 2011, 04:39:42 pm
A three hour rim-job?  Damn, gurl.  You must be a sister from the Conclave of the Divine Member.

 :P miss P are you sure your not related to my otherhalf Bob, he like those too  :D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 16, 2011, 04:42:56 pm
Such a gentleman he was. Dang, now I'm the mood for some morcilla and a Maracujá juice.

I'm afraid morcilla is above my pay grade as a gringo.  Passionfruit, however, is like my favorite thing in the world.  Delish in a daiquiri, up!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 16, 2011, 04:46:11 pm
:P miss P are you sure your not related to my otherhalf Bob, he like those too  :D

Child please, aside from foreskin it's why I prefer Puerto Rican and Dominican men -- they're all just wild about eating ass.  And for hours, diving in proper... none of this faux-lick mess.  I used to have this one Dominican partner who actually went more wild the nastier, sweaty my ass was after a drunken night of dancing.  I'd offer to shower and he'd not allow it.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: denb45 on May 16, 2011, 04:52:48 pm
Child please, aside from foreskin it's why I prefer Puerto Rican and Dominican men -- they're all just wild about eating ass.  And for hours, diving in proper... none of this faux-lick mess.  I used to have this one Dominican partner who actually went more wild the nastier, sweaty my ass was after a drunken night of dancing.  I'd offer to shower and he'd not allow it.

I'm half Black & Guido is that good enough  :P
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 16, 2011, 04:55:40 pm
... none of this faux-lick mess. .

HaHa!

awe-some-o
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 16, 2011, 05:01:08 pm
I'm afraid morcilla is above my pay grade as a gringo.  Passionfruit, however, is like my favorite thing in the world.  Delish in a daiquiri, up!

Absolutely... Since we mentioned caipirinhas earlier today, here's a little recipe:

Passion-Fruit Caipirinha

(Serves One)
Active Time:5 Mins

1/4 fresh lime, cut into 4 pieces
2 teaspoons superfine granulated sugar
3 oz (6 tablespoons) pure passion-fruit juice
1 1/2 oz (3 tablespoons) cachaça

Add lime wedges and sugar to an 8-oz short glass and muddle by pounding and pressing with a wooden spoon until sugar is dissolved. Fill glass with ice and add passion-fruit juice and cachaça, then stir well.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Dachshund on May 16, 2011, 05:14:49 pm
Funny, Jesus and Mary don't mention this happening on their website.

http://www.divinetruth.com/#
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: LabRat on May 16, 2011, 05:18:56 pm
If we all make it through the coming weekend, we still have the coming Apocalypse to worry about! According to the Mayan calendar, the world is going to officially end on 12/21/2012.

I recently saw a piece on CNBC about underground condos and bunkers being built for those wealthy and foolish enough to believe in the hype (remember those scary Y2K scenarios ?).  Fortunately for me, there are some bunkers being built in upstate NY:  http://www.silohome.com (http://www.silohome.com) complete with food, electricity and water. Gee...maybe I should start stockpiling my meds.  :o

I came away from the experience thinking that perhaps some people have to create things to worry about when their lives are comfortable and they have their health... in order to feel whole. (Don't remember this being covered in Psych 101 so it is only a theory).  

Or perhaps it is simply more of the same garbage we've been fed for years: "the use fear to control people and make them march to your orders, e.g. "WMD's and mushroom clouds".  Lions, Tigers and Bears, Oh My!

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 16, 2011, 06:04:45 pm
Funny, Jesus and Mary don't mention this happening on their website.

http://www.divinetruth.com/#

LoL. Another Messiah taking his pic on the patio of his condo. Meh, he does resemble Jesus though.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: CaptCarl on May 17, 2011, 07:26:29 am
Personally, I've been trolling the streete in the wealthy sections of Albuquerque looking for a Lamborghini with a fish symbol on it. That way, when the owner get on the express elevator going up, I'll have a cool car.

CaptCarlKangaroo
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: woodshere on May 17, 2011, 11:29:21 am
OMG!!!!!!  The Rapture can't come Saturday.  i will miss the final episode of Oprah!!!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: denb45 on May 17, 2011, 11:35:35 am
OMG!!!!!!  The Rapture can't come Saturday.  i will miss the final episode of Oprah!!!

PLEASE if ya'll can survive teh AIDS, you can sure surly survive the rapture , most of ya'll have already made it thur the fire, but you just don't know it yet  :D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on May 17, 2011, 01:42:13 pm
Funny, Jesus and Mary don't mention this happening on their website.

http://www.divinetruth.com/#

I wanna know what they're smoking   ???

Just a little over 2000 years ago, we arrived on the earth for the first time. My name then was Yeshua ben Yosef, or the Jesus of the Bible, the son of Joseph and Mary. Mary's name then was Mary of Magdala, the woman identified in the Bible as Mary Magdalene. Mary was my wife then, and the first person I appeared to after I was crucified (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Me4sOR2VhWs).
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: denb45 on May 17, 2011, 03:10:16 pm
I wanna know what they're smoking   ???

Just a little over 2000 years ago, we arrived on the earth for the first time. My name then was Yeshua ben Yosef, or the Jesus of the Bible, the son of Joseph and Mary. Mary's name then was Mary of Magdala, the woman identified in the Bible as Mary Magdalene. Mary was my wife then, and the first person I appeared to after I was crucified (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Me4sOR2VhWs).

Please  ::) anyone cam claim to be a reincarnation of anything, I'm actually a reincarnation  of Ertha Kiit and my otherhalf is a reincarnation of Ethel Merman  it's all about the theater darling :D :D :D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 17, 2011, 08:57:34 pm
Time for a new update from Mister Brasil 2011!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZAhXSBPmLqw
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Dachshund on May 18, 2011, 11:23:10 am
I thought about doing some after rapture looting, but most of the Christians I know have bad taste. That and I can't fit in the Pope's Gucci slippers.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 18, 2011, 11:26:52 am
I thought about doing some after rapture looting, but most of the Christians I know have bad taste. That and I can't fit in the Pope's Gucci slippers.


Thought about doing the same, but none of these evil bastards in Miami will be raptured.  I'd probably have to drive up to Ocala to find some good Chrischen homes.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 18, 2011, 11:42:57 am
I thought about doing some after rapture looting,

You can RSVP for an organized looting excursion here:

http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=121968371215699


Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 18, 2011, 11:46:38 am
I thought about doing some after rapture looting, but most of the Christians I know have bad taste. That and I can't fit in the Pope's Gucci slippers.

As if the Poop is going anywhere. ::)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: denb45 on May 18, 2011, 11:47:19 am
You can RSVP for an organized looting excursion here:

http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=121968371215699




Be careful Willy, they do still shoot looters  ;D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on May 18, 2011, 11:56:13 am
Be careful Willy, they do still shoot looters  ;D

Only if they're on the freeway...

(http://www.nppa.org/news_and_events/news/2005/09/images/katrina_D2_looter_arrested_000.jpg)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 18, 2011, 11:58:27 am
WTF am I doing just sitting here, I need to be out having Apocalypse Sex:

Thoughtless, meaningless, careless sex, often with casual aquaintances, happening right before a major disaster or possible ending of the world, without thought of consequences

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=apocalypse+sex&defid=2771867

But isn't this just a typical Saturday night for MissP?

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on May 18, 2011, 12:13:52 pm
WTF am I doing just sitting here...?

Um, possibly awaiting a phone call from...

(http://i1018.photobucket.com/albums/af308/IwuvPhilly/james1.jpg)

:-X

Edited to add link (http://cache.gawkerassets.com/assets/images/12119/2011/05/jamesm.jpg)

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 18, 2011, 12:39:09 pm
WTF am I doing just sitting here, I need to be out having Apocalypse Sex:

Thoughtless, meaningless, careless sex, often with casual aquaintances, happening right before a major disaster or possible ending of the world, without thought of consequences

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=apocalypse+sex&defid=2771867

But isn't this just a typical Saturday night for MissP?



Child please -- you should have seen the massive Jamaican schlong I scored the day after 9/11.  Those pre-mancunt AOL chat rooms were lit up like a bonfire that day.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: thunter34 on May 18, 2011, 12:51:31 pm
Child please -- you should have seen the massive Jamaican schlong I scored the day after 9/11.  Those pre-mancunt AOL chat rooms were lit up like a bonfire that day.


How very Shortbus.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 18, 2011, 03:34:45 pm
It's good to know that the cat will be fed and the dog let out after Saturday:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20110518/od_afp/usreligionanimalsoffbeat_20110518180405

US atheists offer pet rescue after judgment day
WASHINGTON (AFP) – When judgment day comes -- which some US Christian fundamentalists insist will happen on Saturday -- have you thought about what you're going to do with the family dog and cat?

In 26 US states, you could have them rescued and adopted by enterprising atheists who have set up a business to care for the animal companions of any Christians who are selected to go to heaven when Jesus Christ comes back....
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 18, 2011, 03:48:00 pm
This is way too 4th dimensional.  I like to think that we are already 'aligned with Eight Dimensional Agreements and Ninth Dimensional Higher Intelligence'.  Dont feed the cat early and keep the dog inside please! 
Title: May 21 is approaching fast. Are you guys making the final preparation.
Post by: metekrop on May 18, 2011, 03:49:59 pm
It says .......

May 21, 2011, according to loyal listeners of Family Radio, a Christian broadcasting network based in Oakland, California, will mark the Day of Rapture and the start of Judgment Day (which, they say, will last five months). Those who are saved will be taken up to heaven, and those who aren’t will endure unspeakable suffering. Dead bodies will be strewn about as earthquakes ravage the Earth, they say. And come October 21, they’ll tell you, the entire world will be kaput......

Wow.........

Hope may of us in this forum will be taken to the heaven.


http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2011/05/18/tick-tock-goes-the-doomsday-clock/?hpt=C1
Title: Re: May 21 is approaching fast. You guys are making the final preparation.
Post by: Jeff G on May 18, 2011, 03:52:12 pm
Really .... I haven't heard a word about this !
Title: Re: May 21 is approaching fast. Are you guys making the final preparation.
Post by: GSOgymrat on May 18, 2011, 04:16:49 pm
Those who are saved will be taken up to heaven, and those who aren’t will endure unspeakable suffering. Dead bodies will be strewn about as earthquakes ravage the Earth, they say. And come October 21, they’ll tell you, the entire world will be kaput......

And here I thought I was just going to be single and surrounded by homeless pets, unless that is the "unspeakable suffering" of which they, uh, don't speak.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 18, 2011, 05:00:07 pm
It's good to know that the cat will be fed and the dog let out after Saturday:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20110518/od_afp/usreligionanimalsoffbeat_20110518180405

US atheists offer pet rescue after judgment day


Ahh yes, the business opportunities should be endless post-rapture. Pehaps I will stand on a street corner and sell Bottled water and Oranges to the heathen masses.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 18, 2011, 05:20:34 pm
Ahh yes, the business opportunities should be endless post-rapture. Pehaps I will stand on a street corner and sell Bottled water and Oranges to the heathen masses.


But I thought you were leaving us on the 21st and had your wardrobe all worked out?
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 18, 2011, 05:25:12 pm
But I thought you were leaving us on the 21st and had your wardrobe all worked out?

True, but you should always have a Plan B in these Rapture thingies....never know what I may have done recently to piss off the Big Guy.

But yes, I will have my Bonnet and pumps on at 6pm Saturday.

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 18, 2011, 05:26:11 pm
Wumpy only has three boxes of possessions so his Rapturization will be smooth sailing for those of us Left Behind.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 18, 2011, 05:30:54 pm
you should always have a Plan B

Bah. Plan Bs are for wimps Wumps.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 18, 2011, 05:33:27 pm
Wumpy only has three boxes of possessions .

Did you have to pull your "Wumpy File" for this info? Or did you just happen to remember it? Quite impressed if you didn't need the file for this factoid.

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 18, 2011, 05:40:17 pm
Did you have to pull your "Wumpy File" for this info? Or did you just happen to remember it? Quite impressed if you didn't need the file for this factoid.



Zero brain fog with Miss P -- she has an elephant's memory.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 18, 2011, 05:48:56 pm
I liked Blondie's Rapture:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLhaTzMyGhM
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Grasshopper on May 19, 2011, 02:25:24 am
They are here too    :o   , it's such a small world

http://www.de-wereld-draaft-door.nl/2011/04/20/einde-van-de-wereld/
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: leatherman on May 20, 2011, 05:50:38 pm
here's a flowchart to help you decided if you'll be ones of the ones ascending to glory  ;D
http://peasandcougars.wordpress.com/2011/05/19/will-you-be-raptured-flowchart/
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: GSOgymrat on May 20, 2011, 07:13:09 pm
Some instructions for The Rapture:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmX-lZOYcVA
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Matty the Damned on May 20, 2011, 07:38:53 pm
8 and half hours until the Rapture kicks off down here. It'll hit En Zed a couple of hours earlier.

Jesus is gonna have himself a fine helping of vengeance, I've no doubt! (http://tool.shagnasty.net/wiki/images/d/d3/Th_JesusSmiley.gif)

Glory!

MtD
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on May 20, 2011, 07:50:24 pm
Sorry to disappoint you girls and boys - so put those pumps and bonnets back in the closet.

"Nobody knows the exact day when these things are going to happen," Steve Wohlberg, who has written more than two dozen books about the End of Days, told the Daily News (http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/2011/05/20/2011-05-20_end_of_days_not_coming_on_may_21_author_steve_wohlberg_says_but_were_heading_tow.html) Thursday.

Wohlberg believes the theory that the world will end on May 21, a date set by 89-year-old Family Radio founder Harold Egbert Camping, is "flat-out wrong."

"He is misinterpreting the Bible," he said. "He's a false teacher."

Wohlberg argues that Camping is taking advantage of the present climate of fear. From earthquakes in Japan to storms in the southern United States to violence around the globe, people are growing concerned.

"They're looking at all of these disasters and everything that's going on in the planet, and this is creating a climate of deep interest in Biblical prophecy," he said. "I think that Camping is tapping into that interest, but he's wrong."

Wohlberg said the Bible does not give a date for the end of the world and Camping's system for determining the date is based on "speculation" that's a mixture of truth and fiction.

As a result, he "makes Christians out to be a laughing stock."


Besides, I can hear that last line coming out of Matty   ;)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Matty the Damned on May 20, 2011, 08:04:42 pm
Sorry to disappoint you girls and boys - so put those pumps and bonnets back in the closet.

"Nobody knows the exact day when these things are going to happen," Steve Wohlberg, who has written more than two dozen books about the End of Days, told the Daily News (http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/2011/05/20/2011-05-20_end_of_days_not_coming_on_may_21_author_steve_wohlberg_says_but_were_heading_tow.html) Thursday.

Wohlberg believes the theory that the world will end on May 21, a date set by 89-year-old Family Radio founder Harold Egbert Camping, is "flat-out wrong."

"He is misinterpreting the Bible," he said. "He's a false teacher."

Wohlberg argues that Camping is taking advantage of the present climate of fear. From earthquakes in Japan to storms in the southern United States to violence around the globe, people are growing concerned.

"They're looking at all of these disasters and everything that's going on in the planet, and this is creating a climate of deep interest in Biblical prophecy," he said. "I think that Camping is tapping into that interest, but he's wrong."

Wohlberg said the Bible does not give a date for the end of the world and Camping's system for determining the date is based on "speculation" that's a mixture of truth and fiction.

As a result, he "makes Christians out to be a laughing stock."


Besides, I can hear that last line coming out of Matty   ;)

I think that, with regard to these matters, we can safely discount the views of people whose names end in "berg".

MtD
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: thunter34 on May 20, 2011, 08:11:36 pm
I'm not sure I understand what the point of all this is supposed to be.  Are they trying to scare people into repenting and converting or something or what?  And if so, unless you really and truly believe the world's going to end, wouldn't you think that it would blow your credibility with the audience you're trying to reach when it doesn't happen according to your schedule?

And I also don't understand how anyone who truly is all that devout could think they have an inside into the end date when it says in the bible that nobody's gonna know.  A god that would destroy the tower of babel is a gpd that would change the date just to spite.

Whatever this foolishness is, it sure is getting some press.  The was a story about it on the evening news awhile ago.  I didn't hear exactly what...it was just blabbing from the other room.

On the bright side, I really have gotten my house in order today.  I have cleaned and organized and washed the car and bathed the dog.  You'd swear I had a good sack o' rock, but no.   Just good ol' fashioned motivation.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 20, 2011, 08:22:45 pm
Some instructions for The Rapture:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmX-lZOYcVA

LOL!

Don't drive during the rapture because if you are sucked out of your car, it will be really inconvenient for the damned left on Earth when your driverless cars barrels into them.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: anniebc on May 20, 2011, 08:28:37 pm
8 and half hours until the Rapture kicks off down here. It'll hit En Zed a couple of hours earlier.

Jesus is gonna have himself a fine helping of vengeance, I've no doubt! (http://tool.shagnasty.net/wiki/images/d/d3/Th_JesusSmiley.gif)

Glory!

MtD

Still waiting on our lift Matty, the transport in these rural part's really suck.

If you get there before me save me a seat.

Aroha
Jan :-*
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: woodshere on May 20, 2011, 08:38:25 pm
FYI:  They guy that predicted the Rapture for tomorrow, did the same thing a few years back.  He missed.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Raf on May 20, 2011, 08:48:28 pm
So there's no rapture tomorrow?? and here I was expecting no traffic the next monday  :'(
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Matty the Damned on May 20, 2011, 10:25:48 pm
For those who cannot wait to find out how the LORD will bring about the End of Days, I give you a foretaste presented in Christian mime/interpretive dance. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=URdnyyvVF6k)

Note the miracle which allows that skinny fella to lift that great big fat chick like she's made of styrofoam!

Praise!

MtD
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 20, 2011, 10:30:22 pm
For those who cannot wait to find out how the LORD will bring about the End of Days, I give you a foretaste presented in Christian mime/interpretive dance. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=URdnyyvVF6k)

Note the miracle which allows that skinny fella to lift that great big fat chick like she's made of styrofoam!

Praise!

MtD


Hallelu!!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 20, 2011, 10:35:16 pm

Note the miracle which allows that skinny fella to lift that great big fat chick like she's made of styrofoam!


The only rapture that occured in that video was the rapturing of the skinny dudes disks as he lifted that behemoth.

Glory be to him!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 20, 2011, 10:47:30 pm
Still waiting on our lift Matty, the transport in these rural part's really suck.


Jan get your good knickers on! According to my calculations it's a mere 3 hours 15 minutes till The rapture hits you and NZ breaks apart and falls into the ocean. I'm giddy with excitement ;D

-W
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: woodshere on May 20, 2011, 11:02:37 pm
Not sure about you heathens, but I am spending the last hours watching The 700 Club, cause you know Pat Robertson knows all!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: tednlou2 on May 21, 2011, 01:33:33 am
Matty, are you still with us?  Isn't Australia 15 hours ahead of our Eastern Time Zone, which would make it 6:30pm there--30 mins past the time all hell breaks loose?  I know you'll be the first the baby Jebus takes up to Heaven.

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: anniebc on May 21, 2011, 02:31:37 am
Matty, are you still with us?  Isn't Australia 15 hours ahead of our Eastern Time Zone, which would make it 6:30pm there--30 mins past the time all hell breaks loose?  I know you'll be the first the baby Jebus takes up to Heaven.



No no Teddy, he takes the kiwi's first ..THEN the Aussies...Matty and his mob are 3 hours behind us.. ;)

Aroha
Jan :-*
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: poz1970 on May 21, 2011, 03:02:14 am
the suspense is killing me

feel like going outside and scrreaming repent sinners, so i can get into free accomodation

J.
I survived the rapture, 1988, 1992, 1994, 2000, 2011! (possibly a good t-shirt)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Matty the Damned on May 21, 2011, 03:21:52 am
Matty, are you still with us?  Isn't Australia 15 hours ahead of our Eastern Time Zone, which would make it 6:30pm there--30 mins past the time all hell breaks loose?  I know you'll be the first the baby Jebus takes up to Heaven.



38 minutes to go here. I'm just getting my church hat ready.

MtD
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: J.R.E. on May 21, 2011, 04:40:28 am


I'm so confuzzled.  I thought this was a thread about "Blondie's return:  :D


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x2FDmxeVefU


Ray


Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Matty the Damned on May 21, 2011, 04:49:50 am
Well Jesus is now 50 minutes late, give or take 2,000 years.

Maybe he didn't like my church hat?

MtD
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: komnaes on May 21, 2011, 05:32:51 am
I am not a gloater (well, usually not), but please someone does some interviews with his followers.. especially this one:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wcy2RkeBW90
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: poz1970 on May 21, 2011, 08:07:58 am
most boring rapture EVER

bring on dec 21 next year (bring floaties)

J
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 21, 2011, 08:21:09 am
Well Jesus is now 50 minutes late, give or take 2,000 years.

Maybe he didn't like my church hat?

MtD

No girl, it means you're Left Behind -- you're not among the spiritually righteous chosen to head to eternal glory.  Like, duh.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Andy Velez on May 21, 2011, 08:29:59 am
I don't like uncertainty. And I am getting a helluva cramp from having my head between my legs to kiss my ass goodbye.

Yoo hoo, Nostredamus, where are you, hon?

Ho hum, Y2K or whatever again. Back to re-arranging my dry leaves and then seeing ANYTHING GOES tonight. Which seems an appropriately rapturous thing to do.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 21, 2011, 08:37:00 am
Just wanted to let y'all know that I am being raptured.  I'll be ascending into heaven in a few minutes (just having some tea and crackers while I wait for that fucking light beam to come get me).

See ya.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: thunter34 on May 21, 2011, 08:40:50 am
I am not a gloater (well, usually not), but please someone does some interviews with his followers.. especially this one:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wcy2RkeBW90


Really.   

"If you're saved then you are no longer homo."
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Dachshund on May 21, 2011, 08:44:34 am
My cable just went out. A sure sign of the apocalypse.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: GSOgymrat on May 21, 2011, 08:46:41 am
Apparently there is going to be a battle between good and evil. If I'm last to be picked for a team I'm going to be really upset-- first grade dodgeball all over again.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: woodshere on May 21, 2011, 08:47:51 am
I kinda wish we had a partial rapture and some people were taken!  But not you Rev.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 21, 2011, 08:54:14 am

Wohlberg said the Bible does not give a date for the end of the world and Camping's system for determining the date is based on "speculation" that's a mixture of truth and fiction.


I love it! Refuting one fairy-tale with another fairy-tale. Can't beat that reasoning! :D

I don't like uncertainty. And I am getting a helluva cramp from having my head between my legs to kiss my ass goodbye.

Doncha just hate that? It's tough not being as limber as we used to be.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 08:58:51 am
Its just about 9:00AM here on the East Coast and I think I will fix a pitcher of bloodies to start my final day.  See you good folks on the 'other side'.

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 21, 2011, 09:10:17 am
I will fix a pitcher of bloodies to start my final day.

Make mine a double and save me a seat!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 09:13:32 am
Make mine a double and save me a seat!

You got it!  I'll just turn the vodka bottle upside down and count 10 bubbles. 
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 21, 2011, 09:15:10 am
I'm gonna be so pissed if this whole rapture doesn't happen --


I've got a 50 lb. cold cut rapture platter that is going to go to waste!  I was trying to make a good impression when meeting my maker and figured that Jesus would be able to feed all my other rapturettes by turning my 50 lb platter into 50,000 lbs (the whole loaves of bread thingy)

I knew I should have bought that spare freezer for christmas - dayummm it!

-  Phil (who will be eating cold cut sandwiches for the next month)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 09:18:57 am
I'm gonna be so pissed if this whole rapture doesn't happen --


I've got a 50 lb. cold cut rapture platter that is going to go to waste!

Our diet is about to change radically.  Rumor has it we will all be eating manna and there are only so many ways to fix that.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 21, 2011, 09:22:29 am
Our diet is about to change radically.  Rumor has it we will all be eating manna and there are only so many ways to fix that.
Our next AMG Cookbook could be completely focused on 100 ways to Cook Manna

BTW, can it be safely microwaved? ???

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Dachshund on May 21, 2011, 09:25:35 am
Getting a little nervous. Caught Sam watching All Dogs Go to Heaven.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Andy Velez on May 21, 2011, 09:27:44 am
My cable just went out. A sure sign of the apocalypse.

If cable goes out does that mean I am dead?
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: aztecan on May 21, 2011, 09:28:57 am
What the hell is manna, anyway? Is it gluten free?

Well, its the 21st and the bible thumpers next door are still kicking about.

I'm going to a barbecue to celebrate the nuptials of a lesbian couple I know.  What better way to celebrate the apocalypse.

HUGS,

Mark
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 09:29:11 am
Flights in the NYC area are in a holding pattern already this morning so expect major delays.  This whole rapture thing may have to get pushed back a bit.  Do we have to go through security screening too?  AND, what about carry ons?  Can we take more than one bag with us?  OMG... too much to think about and not enough time to do it.  

OK, on my 2nd bloody at the moment.  Where is my Xanax???
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Dachshund on May 21, 2011, 09:31:03 am
If cable goes out does that mean I am dead?

If you have Comcast and don't pay your bill. Yes, you're dead.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 09:32:05 am
What the hell is manna, anyway? Is it gluten free?

No, its main ingredient is a glutenous glob of 'clay like' mush.  If the humidity high it will stick to anything that touches it.  
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 21, 2011, 09:34:10 am
Do we have to go through security screening too?  AND, what about carry ons?  Can we take more than one bag with us?  OMG... too much to think about and not enough time to do it.  



Security Screenings = Yes --- although the TSA agents are angels, so their groping is much more heavenly

Carry-ons = Yes     Strap-ons = No     Extra bags = Substantial fee (however, those being raptured via Southwest Rapture get their first checked bag FREE)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 21, 2011, 09:38:29 am
Strap-ons = No

What?!?!?!? No strap-ons! That's it. I'm not going. >:(
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 21, 2011, 09:41:21 am
What?!?!?!? No strap-ons! That's it. I'm not going. >:(
You could always apply for a waiver Ann  ::)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 09:44:03 am
There should be 'Adult Toy' shops there.... after all it is heaven right?  
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 21, 2011, 09:47:26 am
*yawn* just woke up. Thought I'd sleep in for the last time.

So no-one from Down under is gone yet? hmmm, always knew there was nothing but heathens down there.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: skeebo1969 on May 21, 2011, 09:49:27 am


   The weather man still gave his 5 day forecast last night....

   Who do I believe?
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 09:49:35 am
So no-one from Down under is gone yet? hmmm, always knew there was nothing but heathens down there.

Good day Will !  I think its at 6:00PM GMT when this all goes down.  
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: GSOgymrat on May 21, 2011, 09:50:07 am
Now that I think about it, being destroyed in an apocalyptic battle between angels and demons sounds a lot more fun than just dying from some HIV-related complication. Open those seven seals and

BRING IT ON!

(http://farm1.static.flickr.com/111/288536256_e2b193880f.jpg) (http://www.flickr.com/photos/36088371@N00/288536256/)
IMG_1470a (http://www.flickr.com/photos/36088371@N00/288536256/) by
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: ds4146 on May 21, 2011, 09:50:30 am
Ann, shouldn't you be gone by now? In fact a number of you should be out of here, jeez!

My sister said she would call me by 3 today as she live on the east and me on the west and if all goes as planned, she should on her way out at 6 p.m. est.

Happy Trails!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 21, 2011, 09:54:58 am
Good day Will !  I think its at 6:00PM GMT when this all goes down.  

Oh, well it was supposedly going to conveniently follow the time zones starting in NZ lasst night...hmmm, did Camping forget to "carry the 1" ?

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 21, 2011, 09:55:33 am
Ann, shouldn't you be gone by now? In fact a number of you should be out of here, jeez!

She's still packing
The whole "No Strap-Ons Allowed" rule through her into a tailspin. ;)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 09:57:56 am
Oh, well it was supposedly going to conveniently follow the time zones starting in NZ lasst night

Good point!

So what time is it gonna happen at the north/south pole where they all come together?  
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: ds4146 on May 21, 2011, 10:05:22 am
The whole "No Strap-Ons Allowed" rule through her into a tailspin. ;)
Does that mean that we should all seek cover? I mean when and where do you think she might hit. Shit if its not one thing its another.

Hell with it I am off to the gym, and then a hair cut, want to look half way decent leaving.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 21, 2011, 10:43:07 am
Ann, shouldn't you be gone by now? In fact a number of you should be out of here, jeez!

There was a knock on my door about a half-hour ago but I hid behind the couch and pretended I wasn't home. I didn't have time to apply for a strap-on waiver (or waver, for that matter) so like I said, I ain't goin'!!!


Does that mean that we should all seek cover? I mean when and where do you think she might hit. Shit if its not one thing its another.

Well, like they say in that famous book of myth and fairy-tales, no one knows the hour. So watch out, mister! ;D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: RapidRod on May 21, 2011, 10:58:09 am
Remember this. (http://listverse.files.wordpress.com/2007/09/heavgate-tm.jpg?w=300&h=148)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Jeff G on May 21, 2011, 11:20:08 am
Wait a minute I'm confused .... you guys did drink your poison cool aid didn't you , I don't want to do this alone . 
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 21, 2011, 11:33:24 am
Wait a minute I'm confused .... you guys did drink your poison cool aid didn't you , I don't want to do this alone . 

Bye Jeffypoo... Meetcha in heaven!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: wolfter on May 21, 2011, 11:36:16 am
Oh man, I can't imagine a greater bunch of people to spend eternity with.  After all, I've always been taught exactly where queer folk go.  Wonder if we'll have the best decorated pit in hell?  Maybe that big red dude down yonder just needs some loving.  I'll take one for the team so that we can enjoy our time together.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: GSOgymrat on May 21, 2011, 12:07:13 pm
Wonder if we'll have the best decorated pit in hell?  Maybe that big red dude down yonder just needs some loving.  I'll take one for the team so that we can enjoy our time together.

Here is a behind the scenes where Lucy explains to God about designing Hell and how homos ended up there.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C8i4le0BIFc
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on May 21, 2011, 12:19:50 pm
Wait a minute I'm confused .... you guys did drink your poison cool aid didn't you , I don't want to do this alone . 

I dunno about the kool-aid, but I'm eating a Total 0% Mango Guanabana Fage container of Greek yogurt now and feel like I've become one of the Angels in America

This must mean I've been beamed up.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 21, 2011, 12:26:44 pm
I HAVE HAD IT WITH HOW YOU FOLKS MOCK RELIGION AND AM LEAVING THE FORUMS 4EVA!

/swansong
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 21, 2011, 12:28:31 pm
I HAVE HAD IT WITH HOW YOU FOLKS MOCK RELIGION AND AM LEAVING THE FORUMS 4EVA!

/swansong

Byotch please.  We'll be hearing the David Morales remix in a week or two.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Jeff G on May 21, 2011, 12:30:02 pm
I HAVE HAD IT WITH HOW YOU FOLKS MOCK RELIGION AND AM LEAVING THE FORUMS 4EVA!

/swansong

You can always create a new account now that you are born again .
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: RAB on May 21, 2011, 12:30:53 pm
Apparently this thing isn't panning out as advertised.   >:(

http://cosmiclog.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2011/05/21/6690267-all-quiet-on-the-rapture-front

I was so certain I'd be one of the 200 million, now what the heck am I supposed to do?  Clean house?  

This just sucks.

RAB   ;D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on May 21, 2011, 12:30:59 pm
Byotch please.  We'll be hearing the David Morales remix in a week or two.

Right. With Cher dubbed in for a touch of fierceness
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Jeff G on May 21, 2011, 12:36:04 pm
I am now convinced the rapture did indeed happen but nobody has met the criteria to go .

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 21, 2011, 12:36:20 pm
Right. With Cher dubbed in for a touch of fierceness


Mah Swan Song will feature Ultra Nate, Juliet Roberts, and Crystal Waters.  Fetch!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 21, 2011, 12:37:09 pm
I HAVE HAD IT WITH HOW YOU FOLKS MOCK RELIGION AND AM LEAVING THE FORUMS 4EVA!

/swansong

Bye-bye sweetie, don't let the door hit your ass on your way out.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 21, 2011, 12:39:39 pm
You can always create a new account now that you are born again .

I should whack you one with my Time Out TruncheonTM for even suggesting such a thing!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on May 21, 2011, 12:45:59 pm

Mah Swan Song will feature Ultra Nate, Juliet Roberts, and Crystal Waters.  Fetch!

I'm feeling the need to listen to the Insane Club mix of "Found A Cure" now because it feels like I'm goin' crazy  ;)  You can keep Ms. Waters.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 21, 2011, 12:48:09 pm
I should whack you one with my Time Out TruncheonTM for even suggesting such a thing!
or a large strap-on --- similar effect but oh so much more seductive  ;)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 21, 2011, 12:58:20 pm
I'm feeling the need to listen to the Insane Club mix of "Found A Cure" now because it feels like I'm goin' crazy  ;)  You can keep Ms. Waters.

Rapture is two hits of x while dancing to the Bad Yard Mix of "What I Need" at Warsaw circa 1995.  The good old days.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 21, 2011, 12:59:20 pm
or a large strap-on --- similar effect but oh so much more seductive  ;)

How are you so sure my Time Out TruncheonTM isn't equipped with straps? Hmm??? It makes for some fun hands-free time-outting. ;D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 21, 2011, 01:03:48 pm
Rapture is two hits of x while dancing to the Bad Yard Mix of "What I Need" at Warsaw circa 1995.  The good old days.

And a sad little 18 year old latina twink you were that year. Did you wave at me across the street at the Blue Door?
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 01:10:00 pm
I took an early flight and crossed over around noon today.  Its really nice up here but everybody is wearing some pretty weird shit. The music will take some getting use to and not sure I dig these wings but perhaps in time they will 'grow on me'. 

Oh... the view is marv-a-las!!!  Gotta run... there is a little angle orgy that I must get ready for and I cant be late for my first one.  Huge party planned for all you folks later this evening. 

Laters!!!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on May 21, 2011, 01:11:56 pm
And a sad little 18 year old latina twink you were that year. Did you wave at me across the street at the Blue Door?

Well that explains the love for house divas of yesteryear who haven't cut a record since.  I'm shocked Lonnie Gordon didn't make the cut...   ;D

modified to take it here (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZoCBuRFWA_k)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 21, 2011, 01:13:38 pm
And a sad little 18 year old latina twink you were that year. Did you wave at me across the street at the Blue Door?

Yup, I remember yer fashionable ass.  I was just a lovely, innocent, younger version of ChiChi Rodriguez back then. To be that fab again would be heaven.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 21, 2011, 01:16:19 pm
I took an early flight and crossed over around noon today.  Its really nice up here but everybody is wearing some pretty weird shit. The music will take some getting use to and not sure I dig these wings but perhaps in time they will 'grow on me'. 

Oh... the view is marv-a-las!!!  Gotta run... there is a little angle orgy that I must get ready for and I cant be late for my first one.  Huge party planned for all you folks later this evening. 

Laters!!!
Do they have 4G up there yet?
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 01:20:24 pm
Do they have 4G up there yet?

Yes and its faster than it was on Earth!  The best part is that its free.  I forgot my Atripla... can somebody bring it for me? 
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Jeff G on May 21, 2011, 01:31:16 pm
I should whack you one with my Time Out TruncheonTM for even suggesting such a thing!

I deserve it ... I thought of you when I posted  ;)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: anniebc on May 21, 2011, 02:26:06 pm
I HAVE HAD IT WITH HOW YOU FOLKS MOCK RELIGION AND AM LEAVING THE FORUMS 4EVA!

/swansong

Oh God not another Swan song...and you of all peopel Miss P, how disappointing..see you tomorrow OK?


JG..don't make her bring out the Truncheon, you won't like her if she brings out the Truncheon...trust me you WILL regret it.

Aroha :-*
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Jeff G on May 21, 2011, 02:29:24 pm
Oh God not another Swan song...and you of all peopel Miss P, how disappointing..see you tomorrow OK?


JG..don't make her bring out the Truncheon, you won't like her if she brings out the Truncheon...trust me you WILL regret it.

Aroha :-*
 

Considering the world ends today I suppose I can behave for whats left of it .  :-*
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 21, 2011, 02:33:27 pm
So this Rapture thing is supposed to happen at 6 PM in every time zone, correct? I'd like to make sure I'm sitting on a huge Dominican cock with poppers going up my nose right when it happens. I figure if I'm lucky I'll end up in a worm hole, instead of just some fluffy cloud environment surrounded by winged angels like the rest of you.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Joe K on May 21, 2011, 02:37:28 pm
So this Rapture thing is supposed to happen at 6 PM in every time zone, correct? I'd like to make sure I'm sitting on a huge Dominican cock with poppers going up my nose right when it happens. I figure if I'm lucky I'll end up in a worm hole, instead of just some fluffy cloud environment surrounded by winged angels like the rest of you.

Before you changed your response, I thought you said you would wind up with a worm in your hole. Surely you can understand my assumption.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Jeff G on May 21, 2011, 02:41:02 pm
So this Rapture thing is supposed to happen at 6 PM in every time zone, correct? I'd like to make sure I'm sitting on a huge Dominican cock with poppers going up my nose right when it happens. I figure if I'm lucky I'll end up in a worm hole, instead of just some fluffy cloud environment surrounded by winged angels like the rest of you.

We clearly have diffrent visions of what heaven is like , I'm over the sex thing at this stage in life I'm hoping for a buffet and a free 24 hour pharmacy .   
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 21, 2011, 02:46:16 pm
I hope there's still teh AIDS in heaven cuz I don't want to have change my pill regimen again!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Dachshund on May 21, 2011, 02:50:28 pm
I hope there's still teh AIDS in heaven cuz I don't want to have change my pill regimen again!

They will probably put us with the lepers. Have you ever tried to play cards with a leper? Not easy, they keep throwing in their hands.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 21, 2011, 02:52:44 pm
They will probably put us with the lepers. Have you ever tried to play cards with a leper? Not easy, they keep throwing in their hands.
;D
LMAO
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 21, 2011, 04:02:05 pm
Figures this woulld happen just before the rapture!
http://news.yahoo.com/s/atlantic/20110520/ts_atlantic/firsttimegalluppollfindsmajorityfavorgaymarriage37962
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Matty the Damned on May 21, 2011, 04:18:16 pm
No girl, it means you're Left Behind -- you're not among the spiritually righteous chosen to head to eternal glory.  Like, duh.

Sigh.

The prospect of spending an eternity with Kirk Cameron and Mike Huckabee was so enticing.

I wonder if Kirk has a church hat?

MtD
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 21, 2011, 05:34:46 pm
Lak omg... It has started...

Scientists: Iceland's Grimsvotn volcano erupting (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110521/ap_on_bi_ge/eu_iceland_volcano)

::starts looking for her Tanakh and her AiDS meds just in case::
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 05:43:20 pm
I think I got on the wrong flight.  Here all along I thought I was in heaven and come to find out its Newark airport. 
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 21, 2011, 05:47:12 pm
I think I got on the wrong flight.  Here all along I thought I was in heaven and come to find out its Newark airport. 
Well, do they at least have 4G there?
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 05:54:06 pm
Well, do they at least have 4G there?

Yea and I just got the fuckin bill for it.  I knew I should not have gotten those tickets from that little booth in front of Walmart this morning.  Actually I think I really took the wrong flight, its hot as hell, stinks like hell, and is crowded as hell in here.   HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.....
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on May 21, 2011, 05:57:32 pm
Before you changed your response, I thought you said you would wind up with a worm in your hole. Surely you can understand my assumption.

And I thought I read something about a K hole.  Oops. Off to practice my routine (http://youtu.be/e7ZT5sajkys) so I'll be ready for the blessed event.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Andy Velez on May 21, 2011, 06:22:42 pm
6:20 pm in NYC and all's the usual not well. Traffic was horrendous today. Rapture sales.

Guess I might as well go to ANYTHING GOES tonight after all.

Disappointed.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 21, 2011, 06:27:50 pm
Yea and I just got the fuckin bill for it.  I knew I should not have gotten those tickets from that little booth in front of Walmart this morning.  Actually I think I really took the wrong flight, its hot as hell, stinks like hell, and is crowded as hell in here.   HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.....
Dayummmm with that description are you sure you aren't in MIAMI? 

6:24 p.m and 91 degrees here ---- unless of course,I'm no longer in Miami and ended up on the opposite end of heaven  --- hold on let me look out the window.........

Hey, does anyone else have a lot of fire burning outside of the windows to their house?  Kind of smells like sulfur --- and people are wearing the craziest costumes --- you would think it is Halloween - some dude is dressed like the devil ---- 

hmmmm?   so, whatever came of this whole rapture thing anyway? 
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Matty the Damned on May 21, 2011, 06:36:43 pm
(http://tool.shagnasty.net/wiki/images/1/1e/Itstherupture.jpg)

MtD
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 06:37:55 pm
Hey, does anyone else have a lot of fire burning outside of the windows to their house?  Kind of smells like sulfur --- and people are wearing the craziest costumes --- you would think it is Halloween - some dude is dressed like the devil ----  

Naaa. You must have driven down to Bal Harbor.  That is the new decor that is intended to attract Dade/Broward youth.  Its a whole new look for your shopping experience.  

As far as the rapture goes, Iceland is the only place that paid the exit taxes so the only vortex there.  
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 21, 2011, 06:39:08 pm
(http://tool.shagnasty.net/wiki/images/1/1e/Itstherupture.jpg)

MtD

And I put all my extra money in the collection plate for this??  WTF!!!

 :D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 21, 2011, 06:40:17 pm
(http://tool.shagnasty.net/wiki/images/1/1e/Itstherupture.jpg)

MtD

Now I have to go pee.

Thanks Matty. ::)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Matty the Damned on May 21, 2011, 06:44:20 pm
Now I have to go pee.

Thanks Matty. ::)

Well go now honey, because you won't be able to in Hell.

It's damnation without relief. :)

MtD
(Who gives his apologies to R. Atkinson)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: ds4146 on May 21, 2011, 09:01:27 pm
Okay as I write this it is 5:59, and I am dressed for.....at the very least dinner and a movie and ......., but if I should get hit by the rapture or Ann's strap on, I just wanted to say again "happy trails" and thanks so much for the support from this site.

I will miss.....oh shit...........................
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: komnaes on May 22, 2011, 08:00:17 am
Apparently you can still "donate" ..

(http://i387.photobucket.com/albums/oo319/komnaes/Picture1-3.png)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: wolfter on May 22, 2011, 08:04:45 am
Blow the trumpet?  I kinda like the ring of that.  Think I'll use it as my new catch phraze.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: LabRat on May 22, 2011, 09:59:19 am
Hi...this is John...Labrat's partner.  I woke up this morning to an empty bed! I don't know what happened last night. Heard a little thunder but ignored it. The only thing left was a "to do" list and this forum was on it.

He was the sweetest, most honest, beautiful, hot, gorgeous, incredible loving man I've ever known! His heart was as big as his...I digress.

He wanted me to send all of you his love and best wishes.

No...I didn't get a pic of it to post. It all happened in "the blink of an eye".
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Matty the Damned on May 22, 2011, 10:01:51 am
Hi...this is John...Labrat's partner.  I woke up this morning to an empty bed! I don't know what happened last night. Heard a little thunder but ignored it. The only thing left was a "to do" list and this forum was on it.

He was the sweetest, most honest, beautiful, hot, gorgeous, incredible loving man I've ever known! His heart was as big as his...I digress.

He wanted me to send all of you his love and best wishes.

No...I didn't get a pic of it to post. It all happened in "the blink of an eye".

So Labrat's been raptured?

Well fuck heaven! If they is gonna take Labrat I'd rather burn in hell with his partner.

What's yer number babe? :)

MtD
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Joe K on May 22, 2011, 12:23:10 pm
Well, do they at least have 4G there?

Don't know about heaven, but I've heard that Hell has 4000G. Unfortunately, it only connects you to AOL and that's where the hell part comes in.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 22, 2011, 12:48:30 pm
Don't know about heaven, but I've heard that Hell has 4000G. Unfortunately, it only connects you to AOL and that's where the hell part comes in.
LMAO  ;D
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Joe K on May 22, 2011, 01:27:12 pm
Just found this link, check out the pictures further down the page.

http://morefreedomfries.blogspot.com/2011/05/raptue-reversal-rapture-mockers-stand.html (http://morefreedomfries.blogspot.com/2011/05/raptue-reversal-rapture-mockers-stand.html)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: LabRat on May 22, 2011, 02:09:29 pm
So Labrat's been raptured?

Well fuck heaven! If they is gonna take Labrat I'd rather burn in hell with his partner.

What's yer number babe? :)

MtD

Sorry to disappoint you Matty.  They kicked me out right after I asked for Tom of Finland...it is heaven isn't it?
They dumped me near the West Side Hwy so I stopped by The Eagle for the Rapture after party. Got hell from my partner when I finally shlepped home this morning. :'(
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: phildinftlaudy on May 23, 2011, 10:57:34 pm
This just in -
the Apocalypse will now take place on October 21, 2011 - apparently May 21st was a spiritual judgment -
the rapture and end of the world are now a "bundled package" - something like what I get with my cable, internet, and home phone service....

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_apocalypse_saturday

Good news is we can now keep this thread going for another five months and no one going to AMG has to worry about losing their room deposit or airfare payment made.  We also get to experience sweeps month on tv in September and all the great summer movies soon to be released.

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 23, 2011, 11:02:38 pm
Damn, that is some bullshit.  I need to start my own church, interpret that book in whichever way I like, and run away with all of them donations to Brazil. 
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Matty the Damned on May 23, 2011, 11:06:42 pm
Good to see that Brother Camping has decided to pitch his tent five months further up Mount Mental. :)

MtD
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: LabRat on May 24, 2011, 10:13:14 am
Wonder if Camping did all this to simply promote his multimillion dollar radio talk show. Huffington Post has a minute by minute listing of everything he has said on his Monday "open forum" call-in show, (not going to link because I don't want to promote his rants) plus he's been covered on every cable news channel, newspaper, magazine, and all over the internets.

Or maybe I'm just giving this crazy too much credit. ???
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: woodshere on May 24, 2011, 10:48:36 am
As a person of faith what the Rev Idiot Camping, who just happens to be a self-proclaimed minister with no theological training, is doing really pisses me off!  Being what I consider a progressive Christian, his crazy predictions and using Christianity to make millions along with the churches many mistakes, their practice of discrimination and their hypocrisy in so many of their actions, really make it hard to show that there are Christians who interpret scripture in a different way.  Sadly I am afraid, there will be those who believe his shit and continue to support him through their activism and money.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 24, 2011, 11:14:40 am
I need to start my own church

Then you will not have to pay taxes. 
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 24, 2011, 11:17:05 am
Then you will not have to pay taxes. 

Zaklee
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: GSOgymrat on May 24, 2011, 11:21:11 am
Sadly I am afraid, there will be those who believe his shit and continue to support him through their activism and money.

I read one guy spent $140,000, his retirement savings, on subway advertisements.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Jeff G on May 24, 2011, 11:21:40 am
There is a squirrel laying by my mailbox that was raptured this morning under the wheel of a garbage truck . I saw the miracle happen with my very own eyes .
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 24, 2011, 11:29:38 am
There is a squirrel laying by my mailbox that was raptured this morning under the wheel of a garbage truck . I saw the miracle happen with my very own eyes .

 :'( :'( :'( poor little rat
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: poz1970 on May 24, 2011, 11:30:54 am
There is a squirrel laying by my mailbox that was raptured this morning under the wheel of a garbage truck . I saw the miracle happen with my very own eyes .

OH THE HUMANITY, WON'T SOMEONE PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN!!!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 24, 2011, 11:38:06 am
I miss squirrels - the Rock is squirrel-free unless you count the human squirrels. ;)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: woodshere on May 24, 2011, 11:40:38 am
I read one guy spent $140,000, his retirement savings, on subway advertisements.

Yep, others drove their families cross country to stand outside the guys house for the rapture.  It is shocking and sad how in today's society that so many are susceptible to outrageous statements when said in the name of God.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Jeff G on May 24, 2011, 11:42:25 am
I miss squirrels - the Rock is squirrel-free unless you count the human squirrels. ;)

Give me your address and I will send you a fresh frozen one  ;)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: woodshere on May 24, 2011, 11:42:48 am
Years ago there was a squirrel that trolled the local adult bookstore.  Got the nickname due to his toupee.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Jeff G on May 24, 2011, 11:44:38 am
Years ago there was a squirrel that trolled the local adult bookstore.  Got the nickname due to his toupee.

So you have actually had squirrel ?  ;)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Ann on May 24, 2011, 12:09:28 pm
Give me your address and I will send you a fresh frozen one  ;)

Ew. Send a live one - preferably with a companion - or fuhgettaboutit!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: woodshere on May 24, 2011, 12:42:25 pm
So you have actually had squirrel ?  ;)

Oh no, I uh, umm, got that squirrel info from friends! ;)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: BT65 on May 24, 2011, 05:14:37 pm
Damn, that is some bullshit.  I need to start my own church, interpret that book in whichever way I like, and run away with all of them donations to Brazil. 

Rev, I'll go in with you.  I happen to be a card-carrying pastor of that church Matteh turned me onto.  And believe me, in "Red" Indiana, I'm sure we could find lots of believers!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 24, 2011, 05:18:26 pm
Rev, I'll go in with you.  I happen to be a card-carrying pastor of that church Matteh turned me onto.  And believe me, in "Red" Indiana, I'm sure we could find lots of believers!

Let's do it!  I'm sure that Philicia and Jeff would love to become missionaries for our little enterprise. Matty could be our own dark pope.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Jeff G on May 24, 2011, 05:20:04 pm
Rev, I'll go in with you.  I happen to be a card-carrying pastor of that church Matteh turned me onto.  And believe me, in "Red" Indiana, I'm sure we could find lots of believers!

I will cover south of the mason dixon line ... Woods can help too , he says he is a progressive christian , I think that means he believes that dinosaurs lived but prefers them to mate in the missionary position .  
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: poz1970 on May 24, 2011, 07:46:28 pm
Let's do it!  I'm sure that Philicia and Jeff would love to become missionaries for our little enterprise. Matty could be our own dark pope.

Visions of Emperor Palpatine (from starwars, it is geek pride day today!!)

J
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Matty the Damned on May 24, 2011, 08:07:05 pm
Let's do it!  I'm sure that Philicia and Jeff would love to become missionaries for our little enterprise. Matty could be our own dark pope.

Not pope (I hate red Prada slipons), how about Grand Primate?

MtD
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 24, 2011, 08:14:52 pm
Not pope (I hate red Prada slipons), how about Grand Primate?

MtD

Nevermind the title, the key thing is that the hoi polloi will worship you.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: BT65 on May 25, 2011, 07:50:12 am
Not pope (I hate red Prada slipons), how about Grand Primate?

MtD

Whatever title you wish, as long as the mula is rolling in.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: woodshere on May 25, 2011, 09:22:25 am
I will cover south of the mason dixon line ... Woods can help too , he says he is a progressive christian , I think that means he believes that dinosaurs lived but prefers them to mate in the missionary position .  

LOL :D

Why of course they lived.  The followers of Moses had to have some form of transportation to get to the promised land!
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: aztecan on May 25, 2011, 09:46:17 am
Well, you heinous sinners have another chance.

That Champion guy changed the date to Oct. 21.

Some people never learn.


HUGS,

Mark
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: WillyWump on May 25, 2011, 10:33:00 am


That Champion guy changed the date to Oct. 21.

Some people never learn.



He forgot to "carry the 1" in his calculations, simple mistake.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Rev. Moon on May 25, 2011, 10:56:54 am
Some people actually believed this crap...


Failed Doomsday Has Real Deadly Consequences (http://www.livescience.com/14295-failed-doomsday-rapture-suicides.html)

Harold Camping, the 89-year-old leader whose study of the Bible convinced him and his followers that the world would end, has been described by his wife as "flabbergasted" that the apocalypse didn’t start over the weekend. There are some red faces out there. And if that's all it had been, then one could argue no great harm had been done.

But while Camping and his followers try to figure out what went wrong (or right) — with news Monday night that he now says Judgment Day will come on Oct. 21 — the failed prophecy did more than just damage Camping's credibility: It also appears to have caused death and serious injury to true believers.

A California woman named Lyn Benedetto was one of millions who heard Camping's message, and became concerned that her daughters would suffer terribly in the coming apocalypse. She allegedly forced her daughters, 11 and 14, to lie on a bed and then cut their throats with a box cutter. She then tried to kill herself, though police arrested Benedetto and all three survived.

Others were not so lucky. An elderly man in Taiwan reportedly killed himself on May 5 ahead of the Rapture by jumping out of a building. He had heard that doomsday was imminent, and had taken recent earthquakes and tsunamis as early warning signs.

There were other unconfirmed reports of doomsday-related suicides around the world as well.

This is of course not the first time that failed doomsday predictions have led to tragedy. The most famous pre-apocalypse suicides in recent times occurred in 1997 when the Heaven’s Gate Christian UFO group came to believe that the comet Hale-Bopp was a sign that Jesus was returning, and the world would end soon. Prompted in part by scripture, rumors, and late-night radio talk shows, the group's fanaticism led to nearly 40 deaths.

Camping's failure holds an important cautionary lesson, because doomsday predictions are not going away. Many people, especially those in the New Age community, believe that 2012 will bring global cataclysm. It's easy to dismiss and ridicule failed prophets as modern-day harmless Chicken Littles misleading the gullible, but apocalyptic visions can have deadly consequences —even when they are wrong.
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on May 25, 2011, 11:13:10 am
This is of course not the first time that failed doomsday predictions have led to tragedy. The most famous pre-apocalypse suicides in recent times occurred in 1997 when the Heaven’s Gate Christian UFO group came to believe that the comet Hale-Bopp was a sign that Jesus was returning, and the world would end soon. Prompted in part by scripture, rumors, and late-night radio talk shows, the group's fanaticism led to nearly 40 deaths.

(http://www.tacomaworld.com/gallery/data/500/tin-foil-hat.jpg)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: hope_for_a_cure on May 25, 2011, 01:59:33 pm
I plan to hold out till Nibiru comes late next year.  

(http://i819.photobucket.com/albums/zz117/jj727802/nibiru3.jpg)
Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: mecch on May 27, 2011, 09:02:21 am
Speaking of resurrections:

I got one of these for the first time in several years.  On a gay chat, no less.

Hello Friend,
My name is Mr.Ben Max; I am senior staff with Nat West Bank London UK. I have a business deal of ($14.2million US Dollar) in one of the account here in my department in UK, If you can permit me I will use your information’s as the beneficiary of the fund. And arrange all the legal documents to transfer the Fund to your account as the beneficiary, and both of us will share the Fund, if you are interested please respond back to me through my private e-mail : benmax6@yahoo.com or benmax6 at ya h o o dot com ( Please do not reply through this Dating Site : Reply to me Directly)
I await your reply to enable me send you more details
Best Regards,
Mr.Ben Max.

Hallo Freunde,
Mein Name ist Max Mr.Ben, ich bin leitender Mitarbeiter mit Nat West Bank, Großbritannien. Ich habe ein Geschäft von ($ 14.2million US-Dollar) in einem der Account hier in meiner Abteilung in Großbritannien, Wenn Sie mir gestatten werde ich nutzen Ihre Informationen ist als Begünstigte des Fonds. Und liegt die rechtlichen Dokumente für den Fonds auf Ihr Konto wie der Empfänger zu übertragen, und wir beide werden aus dem Fonds zu teilen, wenn Sie Interesse antworten Sie bitte zurück zu mir durch meine private E-Mail: benmax6@yahoo.com oder benmax6 bei ya hoo dot com (Bitte nicht über diese Dating-Site Antwort: Antwort an mich direkt)
Ich erwarte Ihre Antwort, damit ich Ihnen mehr Details
Mit besten Grüßen,
Mr.Ben Max.

Title: Re: Repent oh Sinners before next weekend... Teh Rapture is coming
Post by: J.R.E. on June 17, 2011, 08:00:30 pm


It seems that Camping, has had a stroke, recently:   ::)


http://www.digtriad.com/news/watercooler/article/179196/176/End-Of-The-World-Preacher-Has-Stroke