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Author Topic: Great Relief Our Friend is Finally In Hospice  (Read 6746 times)

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Offline Martha

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Great Relief Our Friend is Finally In Hospice
« on: August 04, 2013, 09:07:42 am »
I have posted how bad it has been for one of our 2 friends who have AIDS. The husband who has been rejected and removed from a nursing home due to outbursts of temper is finally in a beautiful Hospice House and he has stopped fighting. I can't begin to say how much at peace his wife, family and all of us are. Thank you for this wonderful forum.

Offline mitch777

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Re: Great Relief Our Friend is Finally In Hospice
« Reply #1 on: August 04, 2013, 11:38:20 am »
I have posted how bad it has been for one of our 2 friends who have AIDS. The husband who has been rejected and removed from a nursing home due to outbursts of temper is finally in a beautiful Hospice House and he has stopped fighting. I can't begin to say how much at peace his wife, family and all of us are. Thank you for this wonderful forum.

Thanks for the update Martha. Everyone involved has been through a lot. Glad you all are able to get some sense of peace and order in your lives. A sad story never the less.
m.
33 years hiv+ with a curtsy.

Offline Martha

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Re: Great Relief Our Friend is Finally In Hospice
« Reply #2 on: August 04, 2013, 12:18:15 pm »
Thank you Mitch. It has been really hard because of his temper caused  by AIDS Dementia and PML.  I made such a fuss over the beautiful private room he has and a big screen TV too. He was in good spirits but very weak. My wish is to help him and his wife take this journey with peace, harmony, forgiveness and love. I think it is going to happen that way now. They have been our closest friends for about 10 years and it really matters to me that this is done right. The memories we make are the ones that last so we must try to make them good.

Offline Ann

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Re: Great Relief Our Friend is Finally In Hospice
« Reply #3 on: August 04, 2013, 04:32:04 pm »

My wish is to help him and his wife take this journey with peace, harmony, forgiveness and love. I think it is going to happen that way now. They have been our closest friends for about 10 years and it really matters to me that this is done right. The memories we make are the ones that last so we must try to make them good.


You're a wise woman, Martha. Your friends are fortunate to have you in their lives.
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Martha

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Re: Great Relief Our Friend is Finally In Hospice
« Reply #4 on: August 04, 2013, 06:33:55 pm »
Thank you Ann. I am glad they are our friends and I can help. Since I have been through this before with my son it all has come back to me even though it was many years ago.

Offline Ann

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Re: Great Relief Our Friend is Finally In Hospice
« Reply #5 on: August 05, 2013, 04:42:33 am »
Thank you Ann. I am glad they are our friends and I can help. Since I have been through this before with my son it all has come back to me even though it was many years ago.

I see you lost your son in 1996 - it must have been so hard knowing new meds were just around the corner. So many were lost when hope was right there on the horizon and I've always felt that added a new dimension to the tragedy that year. My heart goes out to you.

If you're interested, you can add your son's name to the list for the AMG Memorial Service which will be taking place this year in Chicago on Sunday, August 11th. (AMG = AidsMeds Gathering) You can add his first name or his whole name, whichever you feel comfortable with. The list is being compiled in this thread.

If you are in the Chicago area yourself, you would be more than welcome to attend. Details are in this thread.

Hugs and sincere condolences,
Ann
xxx
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Martha

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Re: Great Relief Our Friend is Finally In Hospice
« Reply #6 on: August 05, 2013, 09:27:40 am »
Thank you Ann. I added my son's name to the list. We live in south eastern Ohio so it is a long trip to Chicago.  Yes it is very sad that my son got sick before the medicine got better like it is now.  It's too late for our one friend but he ignored the  symptoms (Thrush) and kept on driving semis until he couldn't see one day while on the road. His wife is doing well on her medicine (she does have AWS though) and I hope we can keep her going strong for many years.

Offline Martha

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Re: Great Relief Our Friend is Finally In Hospice
« Reply #7 on: August 23, 2013, 11:29:32 am »
I wanted to update everyone on our friend's condition. He is very close to passing away. He is blind, in a fetal position and his throat is closing. His wife (who is HIV Positive) finally is crying. She has been too busy trying to get her life in some kind of order she hasn't really cried. I told her to go into the bedroom and let all the emotions she has pent up go. Be mad, even at God and let it all out. I told her I will call her later on tonight but she needs to let it all out. This is so very sad. We saw him about 2 weeks ago. He at his heaviest was a big man and weighed close to 300 lbs. He weighs less then 100 lbs. now. Thank you for this forum and the support you give so many.

Offline Jeff G

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Re: Great Relief Our Friend is Finally In Hospice
« Reply #8 on: August 23, 2013, 11:39:07 am »
Hi Martha . I want to offer you my condolences and thank you for the update . Please know that through this tragedy and your willingness to share with us its helping many people who are in denial about HIV or unwilling to test or seek treatment .

Your friend is so much more than a reminder about what untreated HIV can do to a person but this will be a part of his legacy as well . May he find peace and an end to his suffering . 
HIV 101 - Basics
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You can read more about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
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HIV prevention
You can read more about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

Offline Martha

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Re: Great Relief Our Friend is Finally In Hospice
« Reply #9 on: August 23, 2013, 04:31:28 pm »
Jeff, Thank you. I have gone over and over in my head if he had only listened to me when he developed Thrush. I told him Thrush can often be a symptom of HIV-Aids. He didn't go to a doctor. For me seeing my son and now one of our best friends die from this horrible disease no one should ignore how vicious it is without treatment.

Offline ImisstheOldTimes

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Re: Great Relief Our Friend is Finally In Hospice
« Reply #10 on: September 06, 2013, 02:35:31 pm »
Amen to that Martha, and that HIV/AIDS doesn't discriminate itself! My dad's diagnosis and death were in a month of each other, because he too was in denial, and he too had AIDS related dementia, and it was awful to watch from the side lines. I don't know how long I went with those "what if" questions...all I know is that was the most draining part of my life. It's been about a year and half now, and I still think about him and what happened. I also read many posts here, some places I can't reply to, and other places like here I do. I've learned so much about the disease by these forums and the information they provide. I feel like I can educate other ignorant people appropriately. I consider the members almost family like.
Life is a BANQUET, and most poor suckers are starving to death!

                             ~Auntie Mame

Offline Martha

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Re: Great Relief Our Friend is Finally In Hospice
« Reply #11 on: September 10, 2013, 10:01:36 am »
ImisstheOldTimes, Thank you. We are waiting for the phone call. Everytime the phone rings I think it is because our friend passed away. From April until now this has happened so fast. When he passes away I will post in the Memorial forum.

 


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