ga1964:
Its been a little over a year since being diagnosed HIV+ and I have noticing that I have gotting more sensitive when I see or hear the letters H. I. V., its even worse when someone else is around. It doesn't matter wether its family, friends, or strangers, even my partner. ( That's another issue in and of itself. )
Watching TV, when commercials for medications come on, and they say not to take it if you have advanced HIV disease, or birth control commercials that warn that it does not protect against the HIV disease. Even the PSAs about HIV. I know that it is for good of all, wether HIV+ or not, and that it is not to make someone feel uncomfortable. But I get uncomfortable just seeing or hearing the letters H. I. V.
When I had to see a new doctor for the first time, he had an assistant taking notes for him, and the first question he asked was "Your HIV+?". I just wanted to disappear. I know he knew the answer, because my ID. had made the referral for me, but I guess he wanted me to say it. This is actually the 4th time I've tried to make this post, but my Partner came home the last 3 times before I finished it, and I would get off the site. I know he does not care about me being on this site, and he wants me to get all the help I can. He has been very supportive for me since I was diagnosed, but I feel uncomfortable knowing he knows I'm on this site ( Yet another issue. ).
Has anyone went thru a period or is experiencing the same anxiety over these 3 letters, or am I loosing my mind? Even when I go to my ID., the nurses are very nice and I feel that they and my ID. truly cares and wants to make sure that I stay healthy, but I get so anxious worrying if they have told someone that knows me about my status. I know that they are not allowed by law to disclose patient information, but I still worry that they might. I live in a small Southern town, and people like to get in everyone else's business.
I cringe when talking about my HIV status to my parents, even if its good news.
My Partner just got back, so I'll end this now.
I must be loosing it.
BT65:
Ga,
I remember years ago, I ended up in the ER due to a very painful gallbladder attack. The ER doctor stood at the door and loudly said "You have AIDS?!" What an ass he was.
I think what you're going through is pretty normal. I've been dealing with this for years, and now I proudly wear my "AIDS" label.
dgr20002:
I understand you being sensitive to the letters HIV and AIDS too for that matter. I doubt you are losing it. WHat has happened with your business and your insurance and stuff lately?
David
ga1964:
--- Quote from: dgr20002 on April 23, 2008, 09:35:07 pm ---I understand you being sensitive to the letters HIV and AIDS too for that matter. I doubt you are losing it. WHat has happened with your business and your insurance and stuff lately?
David
--- End quote --- The business is still going (for now), Thanks for asking. Right now I still have insurance, but the medical cost I'm responsible for is quickly getting out of hand. I have to choose between getting lab work done at a cost of $500.00 a round and then there are the meds, or making payments for my truck, the mortgage, food, ;life expenses, etc. Oh, and lets not forget the insurance so I can get treatment if I get an IO or any illness. I have no money left after trying to keep up with the expenses that come with this disease. I'm scared that I might not be able to keep my insurance much longer. I'm scared to think what kind of treatment I'll get if I loose my insurance. I don't know how those without insurance survive.
sharkdiver:
--- Quote from: Bettytacy on April 23, 2008, 07:04:42 pm ---I think what you're going through is pretty normal. I've been dealing with this for years, and now I proudly wear my "AIDS" label.
--- End quote ---
I have to agree with sweet Betty; after awhile you'll get used to it. Just recently I was at my pharmacy and the pharmacist was discussing some medication with me that I was about to take. She said well I'm not sure what your medical condition is but this might react with this and that..... I blurted out loudly a matter-of-factly "Oh I have AIDS and we should check to see if it reacts to any of those meds." She paused, looked around and appeared to be a little uncomfortable as we went on with the discussion. I realized later how easily, comfortably and without shame did those words just roll off my tongue.