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Main Forums => Positive Women => Topic started by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 20, 2007, 05:56:08 pm

Title: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 20, 2007, 05:56:08 pm
Hi GFs~

Our own Aunty Doxie referred to our threads with this title, so I find it only fit to name it as such.

For new readers, here's our history....
Part I:      http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=12526.0
Part II:     http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=13850.100
Part III:    http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=14375.0


Carry on, GFs, carry on........!

~Cindy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 20, 2007, 08:55:55 pm
Yes, I saw Auntie's post and thought that was a wave of the wing to all of us that our hen house is providing good shelter, cackling and more.

No one is hen pecked here, they are only hen penned! ::)

Although some, okay one, of the hens is being pecke*** as of late. You may have noticed the roosters aren't even bothering to crow because some people are getting up so late IN THE DAY it doesn't matter.

Well, to you free range hens, I note there's nothing like a fresh post to scratch about with your chicken legs!

Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 20, 2007, 08:58:47 pm
"cock-a-doodle-DO!"    ;D
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 20, 2007, 10:37:44 pm
Here we go, on the next journey of our online diary cause to me, it is kinda what it feels like. I get to name part 5 and I think Aunt Doxie would be honored that you chose his words to name this one. I didn't even know he peeked in here but it does seem like we are getting a bit popular... ;)


It has been raining the past few days here. Usually when that happens I sleep in late and has no motivation to do anything. I guess me and Moonlight was on the same schedule because I got up around 2ish as well. I almost missed Passions. Nothing really going on with me. I have been monitoring my sugar kinda close lately. Today upon waking it was 116...after taking pills and about 4 hours later it was 88, that's the best one yet and quite a rebound from yesterday. Hey Moonlight, how often should you check your sugar? I don't want to be doing it too often but I usually check every 4 hours depending on when I take my medicine and what I have eaten. Middle finger looks like a pin cushion now... ;D

I am off to finish watching wrestling and then it is back to playing Wedding Dash. Tomorrow may just be a stressful day but won't say anything til I come back from appointment. Have a good night, ladies. :-*
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 20, 2007, 11:31:50 pm
Queen-
  You watch Passions, eh?  Do you ever watch Days of Our Lives?  I watch that one once in awhile, especially now that Stefano's back on.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 21, 2007, 01:12:49 am
Queen-
  You watch Passions, eh?  Do you ever watch Days of Our Lives?  I watch that one once in awhile, especially now that Stefano's back on.

Stefano coming back is what made me start watching again. I'm trying to see how far they are going to go with the DiMeras vs the Bradys thing is going to last. I am a bit pissy that they are moving Passions to Directtv which to me should be called Direct Ripoff. I hate them.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 21, 2007, 03:21:43 am
Hi GFs~

I am an "All My Children" fan myself.  I tuned back in years ago, when Haley and Mateo were having their big wedding.  Lots of hunks on that soap these days! 

OK, so its crazy late but I had to post.  I am on the "phone with Stone" earlier tonight, and I get an email from the dreaded HUMPER.  Its so funny, I am gonna post it here in a sec.  Remember, he sent me the "wine and dine, dressed to the nines" email, and then I declined and asked him to slow down.  He proceeded to say the "wine and dine" was just a "test" to get me to say what I really felt.  Keep in mind this was 2 days after our date, and he wanted true feelings?  Slow the fuck down already....So, he left off in the last email saying he wouldn't contact me, I could call or email, it was totally up to me.  (Yeah, like I'm missing out or something over here.  I have Stone.......).

Here's the latest Humper email from Monday night here (LMAO):

Cindy,

What's up...I know I was some what of a prick,with my last email ! That does not mean that I don't enjoy talking with you, because I do...You are a great listener,and I enjoy your conversation ! I know that you are seeing other guy's....I do not have a problem with that ! I'm just looking for a sweet chick to spend some time with. I'm not looking for a girlfriend, as at this point in my life ...I'm happy being a singe man ! Butt (yes, he spelled it with 2 t's, lol) I am a piece of shit male...perhaps I was being so aggressive with you, so maybe I could speed up the process of getting in your pants ! I'm just being honest, So write me back we can just talk, and I will not ask you out, or bug you. I will leave the ball totally in your court, I'm open game! Gosh I hope I have not over stepped my boundaries !!! So if you are awake,and at your computer, I will be up for awhile... you can call,or write...Thats up to you !!!  Talk soon

Um....YEAH.....RIGHT!  THAT has got to be the dumbest email I have EVER received!  "Speed up the process of getting in (my) pants?' ?????????????  Like it was ever going to be an option?  All I did was hug the guy goodnight and he was shaking like a leaf!  So, after I get the email, about 10 minutes goes by and my phone rings.  Humper leaves an email, in his very coolest Humper voice...."Hi.  You know who this is.  You know my number.  Call me."

I am sitting here in bewilderment that this guy doesn't even realize what a dumbshit he looks like.  I felt sorry for him last week, and thought I was rid of him after I didn't reply to the last email or phone call.  Goes to show he was obsessing about me all weekend, and emailed AND called me, when he said he wasn't going to.  This is like trying to explain geometry to a first grader.  I wouldn't even know where to start, if I were to talk to this guy and tell him what a stupid shit he is.  LOL  I am laughing my ass off.  I think I have sunseeker's humper beat, ne c'est pas?  LOL

Ohon a side note, I had mentioned previously that when I went to Stone's Sunday night, I had said he had the Metal ("Arena Rock") channel on "just for me."  A very old metal tune came on, from c. 1982 or so.  It was by a band called Rainbow and the song was called "Stone Cold."  Freaked me out.  I haven't heard it in 20 years!

~Cindy
R.I.P. Dave
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: sunseeker on August 21, 2007, 02:38:51 pm
Hi Girls

Well, it looks like Moon is moving right along with Stone Cold. I am glad someone is.  My dating life is the name.  Till texting with Cop 1 & 2 and when I was out dancing with the girls on Sunday night met a guy that looks like Cop #1.  I guess it is true we all have a twin out there some where.

Last night went out with my friend Sara and we met our friends for a soft ball game then drinks afterwards.  My Sara is becoming very chummy with this guy who we will call J and I got to hang out with him a lot last night.  He is a really nice guy and found myself being jealous that Sara got a good night kiss and I did not.  J said he has this friend that he thinks I will be perfect for and wanted the 4 of us to go out.  I am just not sure if I want to do that since I may have to tell this guy about my status if things were to progress that way.  Not sure if I want to do that since I am afraid it might get out to the circle of friends that I hang out with who don't know.

Well, I found out that Dillion Ray West is a big SCAMMER.  Not sure if you guys remember but I thought he was either a SCAMMER or my Ex-boyfriend being a jerk.  Well last night he showed his true colors.  I saw him online and asked his how he was and he said he was not good since he has Malaria and can't afford the medicine since he is broke.  So I played along and told him I was sorry and I am sure he could ask for help from friends or family and he told me that his parents died when he was 25 and it would be so nice if he had a nice girl like me to come home to.  Well, I stopped it there and told him good luck with getting his treatments and when he got the clue that I would not help him he started getting mad.  I told him he was a scammer and he would  find someone else to fall for his games.  He then said he never asked me for money and hurried up and got off line.  I am going to turn him in to Poz.

OK well, off to lay out by the pool, can't wait to hear about the next page in everyone's lives.  Bye for now.



Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 21, 2007, 05:50:16 pm
Hi SS~

Yes, that is the usual "scammer drill," the woe-is-me line.....I only wish I had the strength and energy to string one of those litte shits along--all the way to Western Union.  They would just be there, waiting for their money to be wired, LMAO!  They get so desperate when you call them out on scamming, lol!  Its a riot!

Don't be worried too much about dating new people IF you can pace yourself.  IF you have the willpower and the control to take things slow, then you might have some good times.  Emotionally, it can be very difficult, I know.  I was doing that with a few men I had met this year, taking things very slow while I tried to figure out how I would disclose to them.  Good ole Jay and Doc never had a clue.  It IS tough disclosing to a neggie, that's all I have done since '96, but its so nice to have Stone around now.  I can see what Queen means by saying it makes things so much easier.

I woke up crazy-late today at 330pm, after an emotional night.  I started a new thread which most of you have seen.  Today marks the 11th anniversary since my late husband David died.  Its been very emotional this year, because for the first time, I have people I can turn to who truly understand.  The warmth and compassion from all of you is JUST what I needed today!  I love all of my sisters here SO much!  Don't think I haven't been taking notes, I think a good 5 or 6 of us live pretty close together here on the east coast.  I would love for us all to meet sometime.  I wonder where the AMG meeting will be next year?  I have read that in 2005 it was Nashville, 2006 it was Montreal, and now 2007 its San Fran.  Wouldn't it be great if it came back to the east coast next year?  We'd have to fly a few of you in, but we could ALL stay at my house, lol!  Since I have no furniture, there would be plenty of room, lol!

OK, I am puffed up like a blowfish under my eyes, and Queen, I don't have any cucumbers.  I am going to make a grilled cheese sandwich and have some chicken noodle while I watch AMC, which I record every day.  Haven't heard from Stone, but I am giving him some space since I have totally wrecked his sleep schedule for the past 9 days, on the phone and otherwise..... ;)

~Cindy
R.I.P. Dave
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Dragonette on August 21, 2007, 06:55:24 pm
whoa what did i miss?!

i am still away in london.... ML i didn't read your post from today yet, but will in a minute. big thumbs up, told-you-so congratulations on getting with Stone!!! very very happy to hear that. hugs to everyone, got some catching up to do
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 21, 2007, 08:12:17 pm
Another note in the "Life of A Humper"......

Of course, there was an email waiting for me when I woke up today.  The subject line said "Wow" and I immediately thought to myself, when I read this email from Humper, I just KNOW he is REALLY going to piss me off.... So, without further adieu.....

"Cindy, So I guess you are really pissed at me now, I figured you would laugh your ass off at that! I guess not.    Brian "

Goodness, boys and girls, he WAITED all day until 315pm to email me.  In light of recent events where he is concerned, that right there shows some RESTRAINT on his part, LMAO!  (Someone shoot me, please.....)

Well, I woke up after a night full of boo-hooing over my late husband to read this shit from Humper?  I promptly and most "properly" replied......

"Today is the day that my husband died, so would you grow up and leave me the FUCK ALONE already?  I don't have time for your immature games."

If he does this shit anymore (I give him a few days or so.....) I'm gonna sick Stone on his skinny ass.  Actually, I could just go by my Dad's shop for a "visit" with my new man and the news of The Incredible Hulk by my side would get back to Stringbean, as my mom calls him.  Sorry for venting about such a low-life dumbass, inexperienced "man" but we gotta keep some life and humor in this thread.  With Bean, I mean Humper, it just keeps getting dumber.  He could almost make a movie from this.....Gheez!

Haven't heard from Stone yet and its 8pm.  I miss him today, I hope he calls me tonight.

~Cindy
R.I.P. Dave

Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 22, 2007, 04:12:07 am
Yes, it is late and I am still up...Why? Talking to my Boo, yep yep. I also found an apartment...Wooo hooooo. There are a few minor details to be done but I will have the keys on Thursday and can move in then really. So after Thurdsay, I will prolly not be online because I have to transfer the cable to the new place and all. I will try to keep you updated but may be hard cause there is no one's computer I can use to log on here. EM, when I am situated I will send you my addy. Wish me luck ladies.... ;D
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 22, 2007, 06:05:58 am
Hi GFs~

Queen, what am I gonna do without you when you're moving?  Better call the cable company tomorrow (today) and get everything ready prior to the move!

Well, I made it through a tear-filled Tuesday, posting to the 11-year thread and just letting myself feel.  Forgive me if I am repeating myself, but the death of my husband is tough because he passed me the virus when he knew he had it.  He just didn't tell me, so it could have been prevented.  Have you ever read my story in the Long-Term Survivors thread?  Go to "Introduce Yourself" reply #93 or so, for my story.

I mean, my life isn't so bad, the worst thing is the emotional and mental stress that comes with this virus, and not having anyone really understand, who is here in my everyday life.  That's why I am so glad I have my new friends in the Forums.  My point is, is that the anniversary of my husband's death reminds me that I am pos and makes me scared, when I usually roll along, living pretty normally.  Although this year has been one big transition, I still don't know where I'm going.

I've been unemployed since May, just met a great pos guy for the first time after dating about 2 dozen neggies since the new year and not disclosing to any of them.  My life story is in here, as you all probably know.

I would really work myself up after David first died, as if to honor him or something.  I didn't know what else to do.  The black cloud would come looming in on his birthday, July 24th, then the anniversary of his death would rip me apart on August 21st, and then the anniversary of our wedding day on Oct 1st was awful.  We were only married 1yr and 10 mos, and half of that was spent nursing him as he died.  He was 28 and I was 26 when he died.  So, we only had one wedding anniversary.

I want so much to start over and not be held back by this virus.  I mean, I have done a lot since he's been gone, but this year with no job and neck and back probs, and also being single, its been strange.  Not sure what the hell is happening anymore.  Now I've met a pos guy, and Stone and I don't want to go more than a few days without seeing each other.  That's great, but I am afraid he may be a hothead and that down the road I may regret this, I don't know yet.  How could I know yet?  I'd like to think I can help him (translate encourage him) cause he's been to the edge of death and back.  He says he likes talking to me because I am "real," which I understand.  I remember the first pos person I ever IMed, it was incredible bec I had no one like that in my life that I could open up to.  I am sure Stone is feeling that now.  But already, I have visions of him getting sick and dying just like my late husband did.  There's so much that's just out of our (my) control.

I worry too much, lol.  I actually went to bed at 130am tonight, a decent hour, and then my Sustiva kicked in and gave me a weird, spooky dream, so I woke up at 4am and got the hell out of it.  I was running away from an exBF in the dream, a guy from years ago, it was pretty vivid.  I hardly ever dream.  Why now?

Its later than shit, time for my next sleeping "shift."  God help me, I feel so lost.

~Cindy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Dragonette on August 22, 2007, 07:03:11 am
i have since finished reading the last posts, so Queen, yay for Boo, and congrats on the apartment! i am really glad things are shaping up! also things seem to have calmed down in the other respect, so that's great.
Ditto Camille... glad to hear about Ian.

Em how was your family runion? I had a mini one here too, and a "mini AMG", I met 2 forums members, both female. which was great, but also scary/sad, which seems to happen when I meet poz people. I mean on one hand it's wonderful to instantly relate and be able to discuss all those issues that are normally swept under the carpet so openly, on the other that also means you overflow with them to some extent, scare and sadden yourself, and become scared and saddened for others.

So I guess what I'm saying ML is, if even casual lunches/dinner with poz pals had such effects on me, I imagine getting involved with a poz guy, no actually fall in love with one, would have done it tenfolds! In fact I alwasy do my head in when I get with a guy initially not matter what, b/c it makes us so vulnerable, all of a sudden there's someone there who is so important. It has taken me a year and a half to fully admit what my BF means and how desperately I need him in my life. Because it's so scary. Let alone when you've been involved with a poz man before, who infected you.

This infection by a knowing partner is so fucken common in poz women, I seriously think most women I know were infected that way. I just know so many cases online and in real life. We should start a thread about that, but right now I don't want to get angry.

Just wanna send a BIG FAT SMELLY HUG.

Dragonette (last day in London and back to the sticks tomorrow)
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 22, 2007, 08:03:30 am
My first husband (the one who infected me) I'm sure didn't know he was poz.  He probably wouldn't have cared anyway.  Alcoholism killed him when he was 29 and I was 24. 
     My second husband, who I told about me being poz, I met in Narcotics Anonymous.  He ended up relapsing.  I was on Dilaudid when I had the wasting syndrome about 13 or 14 years ago because I had lost so much weight that my bones were rubbing together.  That was very painful.  Anyway, he started taking my pills, melting them down and shooting them up.  To make a long story short, he wiped out my bank account.  He got my ATM card when I was sleeping one time, found my PIN number and went from ATM to ATM (this was back before the banks put a limit on how much you can get out in a day) and withdrew everything that was in the account.  I filed a stolen card report, and a week later, a detective called me into the police station to identify his picture in the tape they pulled off the bank's ATM camera.  There he was, his big mug stealing my money.  Which was stupid, because everyone knows ATM machines have cameras.  But I know that an addict will do anything when they are desperate, because I used to when I used to use drugs.  But anyway, I haven't had good experiences with marriage and I doubt I will ever get married again.  It's just too much work.
     I did have a relationship with a woman once.  I really loved her and we had a civil union.  It was pretty cool.  But things didn't work out. 
     Tonight I'm going to take this girl out to coffee and we're going to talk and see how things go from there.  Wish me luck....
     Cin, I'm glad to see things are working out for you and Stone.  Keep us informed.  I'm also glad you made it through the date of your husband's death o.k.   I know when my first husband died, it took me a year to just get back to semi-normal feelings.  Hang in there, fellow metal head!
     Queen, do you have Comcast?  They can have things ready for when you move in, at least according to their advertisements.  I hope the moving goes alright for you.  Do you have people who are going to help you?  Congrats on the new apartment.  I didn't know you were looking. 
     I guess I've rattled on for long enough.  I have to eat breakfast pretty soon, and, of course finish my coffee. ;)
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 22, 2007, 08:26:27 am
Good Morning All...

Well, GQ, congrats on getting a new place! And, yes, I'm ready to send when you're ready. Drag, I had a great time at the reunion and it's nice to know you had a good, albeit thought-provoking, time in London. Poz means pondering---whether dating, making a friendship, or sitting alone--what was I thinking about before?

ML - Red flag time. Go ahead and call me Mother Hen, but two things sprung from your post.
Now I've met a pos guy, and Stone and I don't want to go more than a few days without seeing each other.  That's great, but I am afraid he may be a hothead and that down the road I may regret this, I don't know yet.  How could I know yet?  I'd like to think I can help him (translate encourage him) cause he's been to the edge of death and back.  

Something he's told you, or did, caused you to sense his temper might be the eventual undoing of your relationship. So often, because women are inclined to be accommodating and "encouraging" we overlook or push gently to the side, the obvious.
 
my Sustiva kicked in and gave me a weird, spooky dream, so I woke up at 4am and got the hell out of it.  I was running away from an exBF in the dream, a guy from years ago, it was pretty vivid.  I hardly ever dream.  Why now?

Frankly ML, I think the issue invaded your sleep and caused your memorable dream. BF, running, are there any similarities between the two men? even if not, as in the paragraph above, you've envisioned the real possibility of the ending.  I don't intend to come off pessimistic, just looking squarely at what you've shared as only an outsider can.

Compartmentalize. Tough to do. Easy to recommend. He's providing some much-needed emotional and physical attention, but at any costs to you? Only you can assess this. This is a very vulnerable time for you across the board and I just want to encourage (translate: encourage) you to steel yourself slightly; get the deep, uninterrupted sleep you need to keep that body and sharp mind running properly; keep your eyes on your job search and most important, your precious health which is key to everything else.

Would I like to see this be your Happily Ever After? Hell yes! But without compromising any of the things that are big deals to you. I'm not talking about compromises of the small, day-to-day, yielding variety. I know you're smart---this is text mirror time, that's all.  ;)

Gee, I better start cooking my chicken feed, no farmer here, and make some hen-brewed java. To play catch up...Bakery Man has yet to call which means he's still at or en route from his mountaintop work assignment or maybe he met a Mountain Woman! I, too, am in employment search mode and will interview on Monday. Fingers crossed.

On another topic, whether we eventually meet aligned with AMG 2008 or not, I'd like to suggest we coordinate something simple in an Eastern US city. Sleeping bags at Cindy's Hen House sounds cozy! Maybe we can find other accommodations, too, so there's not too much burden on one house. If we do this, I think we should plan in PM mode first and then move to phone or personal e-mail to ensure everyone's privacy and safety.

Camille, SS, Cristy, Betty and others...I hope you're well and enjoying these last days of summer. I can already feel fall in the air. Cristy...just thought of your new work---how's it going? Still good? Bloom still intact?

Em

edited to add: Betty, You were posting while I was typing away. I hope your meeting with this new woman goes well. May we have the Breakfasts of Champions in our respective domiciles.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 22, 2007, 10:59:56 am
Thanks for the good luck wish, Em.  Hope you're doing alright as well.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 22, 2007, 12:35:50 pm
ML - Red flag time. Go ahead and call me Mother Hen, but two things sprung from your post.
Now I've met a pos guy, and Stone and I don't want to go more than a few days without seeing each other.  That's great, but I am afraid he may be a hothead and that down the road I may regret this, I don't know yet.  How could I know yet?  I'd like to think I can help him (translate encourage him) cause he's been to the edge of death and back.  

Something he's told you, or did, caused you to sense his temper might be the eventual undoing of your relationship. So often, because women are inclined to be accommodating and "encouraging" we overlook or push gently to the side, the obvious.

Em~

I honestly posted my thoughts unclearly.  You know I wouldn't back pedal and deny anything unless it weren't true.  The "help" I mentioned giving to Stone is in light of the virus, not the "hothead" personality that I fear is lurking.  He is scared of this virus and has had no one to talk to, so I feel I am encouraging him on that level -- to talk, to discuss, to seek info for himself.

As far as the "hothead" thing, it involves his child and another parent who was threatening to his child.  I don't have kids, but I know when someone does something rude and/or assinine to ME, I get pretty pissed.  Stone is dealing with a snobby, rich parent who took it upon himself to "discipline" Stone's kid at a camp a few weeks ago.  The camp owners sat idle and the counselors were all younger adults who stood by and watched, without intervening. 

I called him on his actions since the event and he agrees that he took measures so that he wouldn't sock it to the snobby parent.  He knows how he can get fired up and did a few things to avoid being face-to-face with the SOB.  So, it was a red flag for me too, but I immediately brought it up in our conversation.  I am still on high alert to see if other situations arise, which would tell me that this attitude is part of his regular lifestyle. 

I have never dated a bully.  I simply have passed those types by in the past because they showed lack of self-respect and restraint with their emotions.  I am hoping this is just one case in which this anger from him comes to light.  It invloves his kid, so I am trying to be compassionate, but calling him on it just the same.

As far as the dream....It was funny, but scary when I was in it.  I dated a guy in 2001 who was a truck driver (first and last time I'll do that), and he actually left me for another woman.  In my dream, I was in a grocery store in the neighborhood where I lived as a child.  The old BF was in the store looking for me, and I was running, trying to dodge around corners and get away.  I ended up in the back of the store where they keep everything stocked, and I made my way out of one of the bays and into the old BF's truck!  I hopped in the 18-wheeler (picture a city girl behind the wheel, lmao!) and somehow under pressure, put the tractor in gear and started driving.  I was slowly shifting and moving through the parking lot and leaving, having locked the doors to the cab, when old BF's face appeared upside down through the passenger window!  He had gotten on top of the rig and was riding along with me!  I woke myself up at that point, also had low blood sugar, and was quite nervous last night as my doggie has been sick.

I usually take my Sustiva and it kicks in about 90 minutes later while I am still awake at night, on the computer.  Last night I took it at 130am and went to bed.  It kicked in and the dream woke me up at 4am.  I was here IMing Queen close to 5am and could still feel the effects of the drug.  I can't believe it lasted so long!  Maybe tonight I will stay up while it kicks in, instead.

Em~    I see your point with the dream.  I was a psyc major in college and find a lot of symbolism in my life and in the lives of others.  I know what you are seeing, from the outside looking in.  Let's continue to see where this path takes me.  It is so early in the game with Stone, anything is possible.  I am a firm believer in gut instinct and red flags, so I am with you on this.  That is precisely why I HAD to bring up the topic of his anger where his child was concerned.  Usually I would have let it slide, talking myself out of worrying over nothing so early in the game with someone.

My life is too precious for me to throw it away.  I am thankful for your advice and will let you know what happens.

~Cindy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 22, 2007, 12:44:26 pm
Hi GFs~

We all have our vices, but how much money do we waste daily?  Being unemployed for over three months now, I found this of interest.

These are the top 10 money wasters:

1. Coffee               
2. Cigarettes           
3. Alcohol                 
4. Bottled water       
5. Manicures           
6. Car washes
7. Weekday lunches out
8. Vending machines snacks
9. Interest charges on credit cards
10. Unused memberships

http://finance.yahoo.com/banking-budgeting/article/103379/Top-10-Money-Drains

I am guilty of #7 at times, but only fastfood at $5 per meal, and not recently.  During the past two weeks I have eaten lunch from home.  Hell, I've been waking up PAST lunchtime, lol!  Did good today, though, woke up at 10am even after my restless night.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 22, 2007, 04:27:35 pm
Camille is so *love-struck* that she is still posting over in Part III!   :D  I forgot to look to see if she's even been in the "Hen House" here yet, but I don't think so. 

I sent her a PM and told her to scratch her way on over here!  Read her final post in Part III, though, its funny!

~Cindy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: msoftie on August 22, 2007, 08:33:02 pm
Hi gals -

I just ventured out to this forum the other night.  I read through the Dating Chronicles I - IV and wanted to introduce myself.  I'm 41, poz from an x-boyfriend of 5 yrs, who says he didn't know he was infected - and chose to have a baby after diagnosis.  My child is negative and 10 yrs old now.  I broke-up with the boyfriend after 13 yrs of trying to be a team (unsuccessfully).

Anyway, I like reading about your dating situations.  Seems like some of you are talking to some of the same guys I've talked to!  Makes me realize how small our online hetero population is.  No offense to the 'bi' girls...

Here are a few things I've learned about poz online dating sites:
I've had some interesting conversations with men online, but prefer the phone.  If they don't ask for my phone number after the 4th email - I simply move on.  My life is way to busy to have "pen pals" with non-serious men.  I don't even sign into instant messaging, it's also too casual and a big time waster.  Those guys always tend to flirt sexually or chat about worthless non-interesting things like, 'the phone is ringing', or 'my dog wants to go outside' or even better 'what are you wearing' !!  I don't send 'flirts' or respond to them anymore either, as I find they don't lead anywhere. 

I have several guys I'm talking to/seeing now, and we'll see if any of them make it to the next phase... I will state that I have decided to remain pure through my dating, as I'm really praying for Mr. Right, not Mr. Right Now.

Anyhow, looking forward to future discussions and threads w/you gals!
msoftie





Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 22, 2007, 08:43:51 pm
Hi M~

Welcome to the threads, GF!  There's a bit of an echo in the Hen House today as no one has been around much today.  I'm glad to see you here, and although lengthy, I'm glad you read our history with the dating threads. 

Interesting how your take on meeting a man is a total 180 from mine!  I prefer NOT to jump to the phone first because I find that just about everyone can engage in polite conversation.  I like the IM route myself, where I can weed out the weirdos from one evening online.  I look deep and can tell a lot about a guy's character that way.  Of course, after IMing, a phone call can blow everything to smithereens if the guy sounds like a total doofus.  LOL  I am pretty perceptive and have met some really nice guys this year, all neggies though, until recently.  I'll see Stone tomorrow night for the third time in a week.  Keep your fingers crossed for me, and I'll do the same for you!

Again, its GREAT to see you here!  Sounds like you have been pos for 10+ years.  You may want to post in "Introduce Yourself" in the Long-Term Survivors' Forum, as well as in "By Way of Introduction" here in the Women's Forum when you feel up to it.

~Cindy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 22, 2007, 09:58:13 pm
Well, hey, Chicken Big, I think you've laid all the messages you possibly could while we were out and about!!

Cindy, thanks for the clarification about the kid-related stuff and for understanding why I wrote as I did. I hope it's a winner for you...there's nothing like being able to love and be loved.
BTW -- that truck driving scene from your dream when he's looking in the window...yikey mikey. Good movie scene.

Msoftie -- Welcome. I like that Mr. Right vs Mr. Right Now. I look forward to more of your posts.

Gotta fly around the forum a bit and head to the roost.

Em


Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 22, 2007, 11:25:40 pm
I guess I will add my few pecks for today. There has been so much said that I will respond to what I can remember.. ;D As far as moving, yeah, I am excited it about it. It wouldn't have been my first choice of places but it is better than where I am now. I haven't even started packing yet. What am I waiting for? Actually the moving truck which I will not be able to get til the end of the month. I will be here for a few more days maybe. Tomorrow when I get the keys to the new place, I will be cleaning and then prolly later move small things over to the new place.

I don't know who mentioned it but I think it would be great if we could get together for our own little slumber party at someone's house. Is Moonlight volunteering her crib? I think it would be fun. But where would I go to smoke? Cigs and other... ;) I'm used to being kicked outside so I hope this will be a summer event so I won't freeze my ass off. I have really enjoyed the dating threads and feel like I know all of you pretty well. Moonlight is like my lil sis, we talk so much online and I even send her texts to make her smile.

Ms-- Welcome to the forums and the thread, I'm sure you will fit in with the rest of us hens. I'm with Moonlight on the phone thing and also it is hard for me to hear sometimes talking to someone on the phone. I wear hearing aids and the phone causes a bit of feedback. I prefer IMing and with yahoo now if you have a mic and speakers you can call someone online which makes it easier and safer because if they are humpers, they don't have your number and you never have to talk to them again.. ;) I agree with you about looking for Mr. Right instead of Mr. Right Now, Goddess knows I have had enough of them in my lifetime.

Dragonette--- I'm starting to see too that a lot of females are being infected from their partners. I can't speak for them but my ex knew he was poz when he got with me. I had to find out through a co worker I was actually having an affair with. He was really cool about it, not mad at all and he was who I broke down and cried with. The thing is the guy found out from some nurse who worked in the correctional facility my ex was in at the time. SO, I do not believe especially when it comes to blacks working in the medical field that they do not keep things confidential. I hate to make it sound racist but it's true, if someone black knows your status around here, you better believe they told someone. Sad but true. Anyhoo, when I confronted the ex, he didn't deny it and I was willing to still be with him. What did he do? Left me for a crackhead who was pregnant by him and if I had to guess, prolly the one who infected him.

Moonlight-- I saw that vices list you posted. The only thing I spend mad money on is cigs, pepsi and weed. I am responsible enough to take care of my bills though before I even get my weed. Just call me a caffenated responsible pothead!!!!

I'm happy for Camille, she better get her lovestruck ass over here.... ;D
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: sunseeker on August 23, 2007, 12:51:16 am
Hi Girls

Well, I am going to try and keep this short.  I just pulled a 13 hour day at work then had several orders to place online for my PartyLite candle business that I do on the side.

Moon- I am sorry that I did not write earlier to tell you that I am so sorry you were having a bad day and were upset on the anniversary of your husbands death.  My heart goes out to you.  I wish you happy days a head, but I am sure Stone Cold can help with that. 

Queen - I am so glad that you have found a new apartment.  I wish I was there so I could help you move.  I will look forward to seeing you back online.

Msoftie -  Welcome to the forum.  This forum has picked me up when I have been down as well as given me an outlet for advise.  Hope you stay tuned in.

Em - I am so not looking forward to fall.  I have just had time to start working on my TAN.  I have heard that if you are tan you look 10lbs thinner and I need all of the help I can get. 

Drag- I hope your travels from London back to the sticks went OK.  You may have said or I just missed it, where you there for vacation? 

Betty - I hope your meeting/outing with your new friend went well.  Thanks for your amazing story.  I am sorry that happened to you and the reason why I say it was amazing is because you have managed to bounce back after many obstacles were thrown your way.

Ok going to bed 530 am comes very early

:) SS
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 23, 2007, 01:24:48 am
Hmmm, funny I stay tan all year round and I don't look 10 lbs thinner......Hey God, I want a refund.... ;D
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 23, 2007, 02:06:48 am
I must look 10 lbs heavier, cause I gots ta be the whitest one on here!  LOL

"Casper" and Cheech

[attachment deleted by admin]
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 23, 2007, 02:20:40 am
You do have that Powder look going on...LMAO.....Let me guess when you get too much sun you burn?
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 23, 2007, 02:23:06 am
You think "white cheeks" here could actually sport any shade of brown?  Um......NO, just a darker shade of white, GF, lol!

~Cindy
(who is most proud of her drivin' arm......)
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 23, 2007, 08:04:40 am
ML/Lady Lyrics -- That would be a Claptonesque "whiter shade of pale" ! Wouldn't it? Drivin' arm tans are so, well, unique, aren't they? I've considered a truck driving career at various points along the way. Solitude. Independence. CB radio chatter (only kidding). Sightseeing.That would ensure a ten-pound loss look on the left side of my left arm, right? BTW -- I'm curious...did Doc simply fade into the sunset?

GQ - LMAO - Wanting a refund from Goddess for your au naturale tan not giving you a leaner look. We will accommodate your medicinal smoking needs by scheduling the slumber party during a season that will keep your tan ass warm. 'kay? Good luck on the move. Hate moving. Stressful. I never pitch enough crap and drag it to the next haunt. Not so anymore. Downsizing as much as I can while I have the strength and motivation. Finally.

SS - I'd not heard of that 10lbs less tan factor. I'm like ML. I look more like a product from a mushroom farm than planet earth -- except my arms from gardening/mowing/walking. Partylite has some very nice stuff---I hope you're doing well with your side business. I went to a party once and purchased two sizeable five-candle, wrought-iron-like holders--they're great for table centers or putting in the fireplace instead of a grate/faux logs, etc. In fact, (selling feature for you) I got glasses to fit the diameter of the platforms for the candles and use tealights in them. The glass refracts the light and makes the whole blazing unit safer in dinner/buffet settings.

ML/ Re: the Vice List -- this was a good exercise in examining where my vice dough goes. I definitely have some leaks and some former leaks I'm glad I plugged!
1. Coffee - make it at home AND sometimes have it at coffee shop - it IS my remaining "addictive" vice. I like caffeine.               
2. Cigarettes - quit 20 yrs ago this month           
3. Alcohol - quit 20 yrs ago last March                 
4. Bottled water - quit buying what little I bought last month after the recent reports of how companies must print on the label when source is tap water. I now "bottle" my own tap H20 except when there's no alternative.       
5. Manicures- once in a very blue moon - maybe twice a year for fun/treat and to see someone else do it far better than I do         
6. Car washes - only periodically - car is now almost ten yrs old, so I let the rain wash it or I wash it when it's crying out for attention. I certainly don't wax it anymore.
7. Weekday lunches out - hmmmmm. not lunches, but dinners. This is a bit of a problem. Sometimes due to laziness (not having shopped for ingredients) or just being too tired to want to cook. I love Thai and Vietnamese cooking or a great burger (like red meat but try to hold back). All three are available within a stone's throw of home, so, this is the top money-sapping vice for me. I can work on this one.
8. Vending machines snacks - hardly ever
9. Interest charges on credit cards - rarely
10. Unused memberships - in the distant past -- good intentions at gyms -- I'm just better off walking, weeding and helping people move objects for exercise--but, this winter, I'm going to try to use the ball,5 and 10# free weights and Nordic Track that I collected (again with those good intentions) and actually create an area in which to work out. I notice I lose muscle mass faster than ever before if I'm not active.

Well, gee, with all of this lifestyle introspection, I'm gonna get my lazy butt out of the chair, put a grocery list together, see the dentist, go to work and try to come home, shop and cook food tonight! Oh yippee. Not.

Maybe Bakery Man will call today, huh? I'd much rather be writing about a pending date than the innards of day-to-day life. Absence can also make a heart grow weary and bored, too.

Betty, oh Betty!! Can we know how the meeting with New Woman went? Certainly hope it was enjoyable. And Camille, pray tell what art thou doing?

Off to find some order in the pecking order of the To Do list. . . . .   .. .  .  . ...        .     .         . .             . . .           .. 
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: camille07 on August 23, 2007, 09:05:24 am
Thanks Cindy for getting my head out of the clouds-  I posted this in the other thread but copied over here because this is really funny.



Ian is fantastic.  He spoils me rotten and he is romantic and passionate.  I told him to come to this site because there's a lot of information for someone's who is negative.  He asked if it was ok to read the forums...and I thought, I have nothing to hide...sure.

WELL-  about a half an hour later I send him an email saying "you may read some stuff that you'll find disturbing"...and I receive an email right back saying "Yeah I see that".

hmmmm. I thought.  Emails don't usually carry a voice but my gut told me he was really upset.  So I called him up asked him what was wrong?

Laughing, he said,  I'm an idiot.  By you creating aliases for all the other men in your life I thought there were other men that you were dating , "for a second a was really upset over this Ian guy".  LOL Cheesy

I think I laughed all night about it.    Don't worry, he won't be reading it anymore...I sent over to thebody.com for information LOL Cheesy

Any way its brilliant the time we spend together.  Last night we watched "trainspotting" snuggled, ate pizza and drank Guinness, what more could I ask for......oh yeah, and sex. 

Cindy have you heard from Stone, weird music moment that must have been...That other guy is such a twit.
Queenie-  I'm glad to hear that Boo's around and keeping you up all hours.
Sun-  Glad to see you posting, nice to meet you.
Betty- Wow, that is really a crazy life you lived.  How did things end up with the girl in the  cafe?

How are the rest of you EM, MS, Drag, and anyone else I might have forgotten.

hugs

Cammie






Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 23, 2007, 09:27:31 am
Hey Camille-
  I am so glad things are working out with Ian.  I hope things keep going well, fantastic!
   My meeting with the girl went fine.  We actually went to a rare public restaurant that still allows smoking in a certain part of it, as she wanted to go there to be able to smoke.  I got a salad and iced tea and she ordered a salad and a cherry coke and we were there for like an hour and a half.  She's very nice, likes the arts (which is a plus), but apparently is very high maintenance.  I'm in recovery, and her sponsor is my best friend and she told me about the high maintenance part.  We'll probably go out again in a couple weeks.  I need to get to know her more.  I think she isn't at the point yet of trusting me with a lot of personal information, probably for fear that I'm going to tell my best friend.  And that's understandable.  She's very attractive too. ;)
   Cin, my metal friend, I'm wondering how things are going with you and Stone.....
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 23, 2007, 09:41:41 am
Hello Ladies. Em, glad to see you back and safe. Work is going well, same place I have been for over a year but I just part-time it cause that's when I have a babysitter. Sunday was rough, too many people coming in all at the same time and I actually got a complaint, which is so rare it's like hen's teeth. ;D                                                           As far as dating, I quit! i gave Tenn my phone #, no call. Fuck it, I am sick of trying. I would like to find a man but am not going to beg. I got neggies at work chasing me but that's out.                                        Queen, glad you are getting a new place. Hope that your move goes smoothly and you have everything you need. I love your tan  but your is natural and good for you. I always stay pale except for my driving tan cause skin cancer runs in my family soI avoid the sun. it might not help, all kinds of cancer run in my family.                                                Camille, Sex? What's that. Other than my surgery, no one has touched me for over 2 years. I am so jealous but happy for you. and for ML as well.     Betty, glad your date went wel. Trust will come and meanwhile, enjoy.                                                                            Msoftie, Welcome to the forums, Great bunch of people here. Hope to hear more from you.                                                              Ladies, I would love to meet you all. ML's is only a couple hundred miles away so I'm in as long as my schedule allows.        Anyway, Love ya'll.  Cristy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 23, 2007, 11:02:53 am
Wow!  THIS is more like it, my fine, feathered flock!  I felt so damn alone in here yesterday.  I really need to get a job.   :D   I have been applying left and right, but at age 37 with a college degree and lots of experience, I am stuck in the middle.  I am overqualified for many positions, and underqualified because I don't have a Masters.  Well....shit on it. LOL

I am missing Nic / zachysmom.  Where are you GF?  Come out, come out wherever you are........Cock-a-doodle-do.......?

Spoke to Stone last night for about 1-1/2 hrs.  We talk every night now, one day hasn't gone by where we haven't talked.  Tonight will be the third time I've see him.  In ONE week.  Doesn't Bean, I mean Humper, wish he was Stone?  Not a chance in hell there, lol! 

As far as Doc, I called him last week on Thursday to check on him.  Seems the weekend prior some shit hit the fan legally, so I have laid low with him.  He is really stressed out with all that is going on, not his fault, but he is in the middle because of his great mind, and has had to seek legal counsel.  That's the last I heard, anyway.

Yes Betty, hearing "Stone Cold" play was PRETTY wild, esp at Stone's house.  Tuesday night I had Yahoo tunes going on my computer and "Stone In Love" by Journey came on.  I haven't heard that in ages, either.  Strange shit going on with the Stone themes, but it keeps me on my toes!  Glad to hear about your new friend.  No sense in rushing, it ruins all of the excitement!  Wait, WHO am I to say that?   :P

Sunseeker, look what you started with the whole tanning thing, lmao!  I say go out with that guy on a double-date as friends.  I think it would boost your confidence, I just don't wanna hear about you crawling around from too many drinks!   :o

You know Em, I am familiar with Clapton's lyrics, just never thought of myself that way, lol.  "Whiter shade of pale" works, but I think Queen is gonna call me Powder from here on out, lol.  Em, Bakery man needs to get himself off the mountain and bake you a cake, as fast as he can.  Tell him there's a flock of hens anxiously awaiting your rendezvous!

Hi Drag~   I got your PM this morning.  I was asking about the eye trouble cause Stone had it a few years back.  Seems he had maybe 3 OIs in about 2 years prior to diagnosis, as he first got diagnosed and then shortly after.  Scares me, but he is on meds and is undetectable, with a CD4 in the 600s, so that makes me feel better.   I just can't imagine meeting someone and then having them go down the same road my late husband did.  I have to remind myself that things are different now.

Oh man, not to get misty, but I can't help it now.  I feel REALLY close with all of you, especially from our rapport here over the past two weeks.  To think that something dreadful could happen to any one of us is heartbreaking.  I love you GFs so very much.  We have to promise to always stay in touch, and yes, have our own little AMG, East Coast style.  We can be a great source of strength for each other if and when bad times ever come upon us.  Maybe one day we can even invite the gay bois, too, lol.....

On a lighter note, I am just brainstorming, taking the "high" Queen's requests into consideration for our get-together down the road......Maybe next May or June we could get together.  We could also take a short field trip down to my parents house which is about a 20-minute drive from me.  They have 12 acres so Queen could go and smoke to her heart's content.  My Mom smoked weed a lot in the 80s, hell, she'd probably get out there and light one up with you, GF!  LOL  She is also quite the dancer (flashing back to 2 weeks ago at their place....) 

Frederick , where I live, is a nice suburb, and all of the highways converge right near my place so its easy to get to.  I-70 comes in from PA to the west and Baltimore (BWI airport) to the east, I-95 runs up from VA/NC and connects to highways near Dulles airport in VA....Ah yes, I think my place is "The Roost."  :D Plenty of hotels and places to eat nearby, too.  Its pretty nice here in suburbia without being so congested like downtown somewhere in a big city would be.  We even have a quaint little area in the "City of Frederick," the historic district with restaurants everywhere.

Can you see us tearin' it up at one big bar one evening?  I know we're all on a budget, and getting here would cost money in itself, but we could cook out on the grill every night and eat good for cheap.  I wonder if my parents would be willing to host all of us for an evening or two?  I'm really excited.  I could easily have 3 of you at my place with 2 of us sharing my bathroom and two in the basement sharing the bathroom, a few more at a hotel just 3 miles from my house.....and I would certainly be willing to pitch in where I could to help pay for food.  I know some of us are on limited incomes.  Hell, I don't even HAVE an income, but by next year I'll have SOMETHING ...I think we need to talk about this more, it could be like The Ya-Ya Sisterhood!    I'm really excited!

I am actually feeling a little crappy and crampy today, Aunt Flo is on her way over, but I go to massage therapy later, so that should help to relax me.  Wish Nic was here so I could ask her about stopping the pill.  I have 10 days to go and if I decide to stay on it, now is the time to decide.  This cycle has been easier than last month's, I think the fibroids I had detected in May are shrinking some.  Just gotta wait and see.  Figures I get a playmate as I decide to go off the pill.  Hope my cycle straightens out.  I'm not getting a fucking D&C for the hell of it, no way, no way, no way.

Camille, I wonder if I can "snuggle" with Stone like you do with Ian.  ;) The man is one HOT horn dog, but with Flo dropping by soon, he and I may just be snuggling tonight.  It'll be interesting to see how he treats me.  I think he will be a gentleman, that's what makes it all so exciting.  I am just where I want to be right now!  Just have to wait and make sure he's not out to just get his rocks off, you know?  I'm not quite kicking myself for slingshoting into this dating thing with him, but it certainly goes against anything I have ever done before, and is a first for me.  I am content, so that's all that matters for now.  Yes, "Mother Em (Hen)"  I have the radar up.  I don't take any crap.

Msoftie~  If its not too much to ask, where are you from?  I respect your privacy, but just curious as the flock is discussing a get-together!

Sex? What's that. Other than my surgery, no one has touched me for over 2 years.

Cristy~   You got me rollin' over here with that comment, lol!  Keep the faith and hell, stir things up some.  Get HIS number and call, just for kicks.  You never know....... ;)

OK, gotta get my ass in gear, maybe go to the grocery cause the cupboard is looking bare......Great to hear from all of you!

~Cindy


Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 23, 2007, 12:25:21 pm
I think the get together sounds great!  I live in Indiana though, and would probably have to mapquest the whole thing.  I have a niece who lives in Baltimore.  Maybe she would know how to get there.  I don't even know where Frederick is.  But it sounds like it would be a lot of fun.  We need each other.  There are no support groups in my town for women with HIV.  We don't have massage services etc. like some other towns do.  BTW Cin, when you get a massage, does your sugar crash?  I got a massage once and mine really crashed.  I was just wondering if you had any tips or if anything like that ever happened to you. 

Today is a slow day for me.  All I really had to do was to clean house.  I was supposed to go to the Breast Care Center at one of the hospitals to get a follow-up mammogram done for a needle biopsy on a lump I had to have earlier this year, but I really didn't feel like going.  The biopsy was negative; I think they're just trying to get more money. ;)  So I called and rescheduled. 

That's really about all that's been going on with me.  Got to go-my therapist will be here in like 15 minutes.  Yes, I have a therapist who comes to my apartment.  I've been seeing him since '91 and he and his wife are my granddaughter's godparents.  Take care everybody!
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 23, 2007, 08:23:18 pm
A therapist who comes to your roost? Oh Betty dahling, you are one lucky chick.

ML, no wing flappin' about it, you won't hear a peep from me about protecting yourself. May I be the first to chirp, no clucking way!, I promise.

Cristy - why did I think you were heading to a new job? maybe it was just the post-surgical return to work----or, uh-oh, perhaps I have you cornfused with another hen? well, glad to know things are going well.
Just watch, once you've neutralized Tenn in your mind, he'll call.

QG, you know, making the timing of this get together accommodate your aversion to the cold air on your tail feathers pushes it well into 2008!! I think you're plenty funny w/o it!  ::) At least from one of your recent sit on someone's uh, someone's um, sitting on somethin' posts. So, I'm game for doing something earlier if we can. To borrow a JK, just sayin'.

Read an article today about plummeting flight prices. Could be a good thing for all of us---although I know some of us will be driving for sure.


Camille -  Gotta side with Cristy. Don't have sex anymore, but recall just enough about it to be slightly jealous and very glad for you. Someone should be blowing the carbon out of their engines, heck it may as well be you and ML!! Vrooooooooooooooommm. Vrooooooooooooooommmm!!

ML---loved the bake me a cake as fast as you can thang...I'm neutralized already. I'll be very pleasantly surprised when the call comes, but a little voice inside says, ain't nothin' wrong with the phone fella! But, I think he's a get to know you in person type and not a phone user----ah well.

Didn't zachysmom start an I'm Here I'm Here thread this week? Swear I saw it.

Meanwhile, I found the most handsome hunk of elder statesman human on the POZ site. Sent a brief note, we'll see if he replies. I don't use a photo there and I'm sure that would make me skittish as hell if I were the recipient. If he writes, I'll be sure to add it to our chicken feed.

On that note, I'm hungry!!! Just got home from work and it's time to ---oh yeah, make some food in my own econo-kitchen so I don't make the Thai or Vietnamese any wealthier tonight.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Em
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 23, 2007, 09:24:51 pm
OMG, I am freaking exhausted. I been at the other place since about 1ish going over the place cleaning it and airing it out. I see one problem already, I got 2 sets of Bebe kids living close to me, across the street and next door. One of them already tried to prank us by ringing the doorbell and running but my room mate busted her. Then this one little heffer had the nerve to ask me if I was staying the night there tonight. Even though I am not yet, I told her I was and why, does she plan on robbing me? WTF? Where is her damn mother? Don't get me wrong, I like kids but not ones with no home training and act like they are already working towards getting a criminal record... >:(

EM--- Even though I am a January baby, I hate the cold so yeah 2008 when it's warm would work better for me. Airfares are dropping? Now how long is this suppose to last prolly not by the time we would get together.

Moon, oops, I mean Powder.... ;D So you are saying I have to go over your Mom's house to smoke? Maybe I should camp out over there and me and your Mom can stay puffy.... ;D Then during the day or whatever I can be with everyone else cause you know I love my weed.. ;)

Now y'all don't want to talk about when the last time I had some lovins, it's been about as long as Christy and the only penis I see is when I pop in a porno which I haven't done in awhile cause I got tired of teasing myself..LMAO...
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 23, 2007, 11:02:15 pm
Queen,I just searched Aston Masters andGod, I wish he was on our team. Sorry about the punks, maybe they will turn out okay. Love ya, Cristy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: sunseeker on August 23, 2007, 11:11:32 pm
Hi Girls

A meeting sounds great.  I am game.  

Moon- I promise if I go out on the that double date I promise not to be crawling around from to many drinks and I promise not to show any boobs either.  But is cleaveage ok?

Queen - Not that I promote violence considering my profession but I say throw some eggs at those pain in the ass kids.  I have learned from 12 years of experience if you don't nip their behavior in the bud they will never stop.

Girls sorry about the tanning comment I just would rather have tan cottage cheese thighs then white ones.  One day I will invest in lypo after I have a kid.  

Well, you may all be happy to know that as of 3pm today I have given up on Cop #1.  I sent him a text message after he was rolling around on the ground with some criminal with a gun.  I waited till he cleared the scene and was at the office going hope before sending the message.  I asked him if he was OK  and he said Yes and that was it.  So I am done.  Stupid me for telling him that I was + after 1/2 hour of great four play in my kitchen.  DUMB DUMB.

Cop #2 is still texting but have not decided what to do with him  We will see how that progresses.

Moon-  I am one month off the pill and Auntie Flow came to day.  But it was nice this first month not to have a period for 6 weeks.  I am sure that won't last long.  I also have fibroids but this month after stopping the pill has been fine.  I did not even spot the week prior.  I stopped taking the pill since I broke up with my ex and I was hoping I could loose some weight after sometime.  I just have to see how the migraines are without being on the pill.  Being on the pill really kept my migraines at bay.  

Well, to the rest of the ladies I hope you all have a great night, till tomorrow.

K
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 24, 2007, 12:12:59 am
Maybe I should camp out over there and me and your Mom can stay puffy....  LMAO. You'll end up converting all of us or cause us to revisit our teenhoods. Better bring extra. Okay, so you win...2008...and that ought to give Drag enough time to find some cheap airfare and maybe we could woo Englishgirl (who has yet to visit us here, but hopefully will soon) and Sweetasmelia (who also has yet to visit) and the Ann/Annie's and, and, ....to consider coming to the US.

Well, interesting development. A person I'd e-chatted with via POZ re-emerged tonight. Communication had simply evaporated. Turns out he was on the road for two weeks. So, not a word from the elder statesman, but the younger statesman---Surprise!

GQ---Your reference to Bebe girls went over my head. Who are they? Glad you did the tough neighbor act early. Hope the place suits you.

Cristy---Figured out the work confusion item. It was Zachysmom who was heading to a new job. Pardonnez moi!

Everyone--have a great night's sleep.

Em
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 24, 2007, 02:01:49 am
OMFG, You never saw Bebe's Kids? It's an animated movie about these 5 kids that are bad as hell. The kids are black but they cause havoc wherever they go. The main reason they are bad is because their mother is always gone and leaves them alone all the time. I guess prolly none of you never heard of Bebe's kids. Hmmm, in this instance, I guess it really is a black thing.

Now Em, Are you saying I will corrupt you all to smoke? Not me, I don't do peer pressure, it would have to be your choice. For those who would consent I guess I would have to roll you joints cause you're amatuer smokers. I, myself smoke blunts because I am The Queen of Green... :D Now when you say statesmen, does that mean they are in politics or they are from where you are?

I think it would be great if the ladies overseas could come to our little hen party. I would seriously be tripping over the accents. I love accents especially when it's a man!!!!! I'd be ready to throw my panties at them..lol..

Sun-- It is hard to nip kids in the bud because when you try to correct their bad asses they try to cuss you out or their parents give tude. Then the police end up getting called because they want to try to fight cause you're telling them how bad their kids are. I have seen this happen before. What I'll try to do is investigate who their parents are if possible.

Hmm, wonders where Powder is, like I don't know... ;D I'm sure she'll get a kick out of my previous post. I think I got her hooked on one of my computer games, she thought it was funny as hell. Tomorrow it will be making calls and getting things transferred over to the new place. Since my cousin said he will move me, I am hoping I can have things over to the place by the weekend but it really depends on when things can be transferred. If my cuz backs out on me then I will have to wait til the end of the month which is just the end of next week....
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 24, 2007, 05:17:21 am
Tired as shit here, haven't gone to bed yet.....but wanted to add....

WHITEBREAD HERE REMEMBER'S "BEBE'S KIDS" from when it was on TV! 

and you know I'm the whitest one here.........I'll post about Stone in the morning.  What a nice guy!  What a gentleman!  He scored points with me tonight and we weren't even horizontal....which is how I'm gonna be in a minute when my head hits my pillow.

~"Powder" 

P.S. - SCAMMERS?

Full moon is coming, they are out in droves!

chukauzor, 40
corpus christi, Texas

Favorite TV:  "Oprah Wilson Show"    ???

Also armani1962, he MAY be legit, not sure, and beyoubeme, he sounds like crap

Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Dragonette on August 24, 2007, 06:48:21 am
Hi all

a very tired Drag here dragging her ass, still in a robe at 13.00.
i have so  much work and so much socializing to do this weekend/coming week. Boohoo, poor me.

Em, I think I know your older guy? is he from the DC area?

glad things are turning out fine mostly.

hugz
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 24, 2007, 07:44:45 am
I always miss getting in on the conversations here!  Probably because I go to bed before anyone else and am usually up when people are catching their zzzzzzzzzzzzz's.  The appointment with the therapist went well.  I described exactly what happened the night my mum passed.  I can do that without crying now (pretty much).  I think because it was so peaceful. 

I haven't had sex in like four or five years (it's been so long, I'm losing track :D).  So I can sympathize for those of us who aren't getting any.  But for those of you who are, go on girls!  Hope it's good! 

Gotta go eat breakfast.  Hey Powder, did you happen to read my question to you about when you get a massage, if that causes your blood sugar to crash?  I'm asking you also, Queen of Green, because I know you're a fellow diabetic.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 24, 2007, 08:36:42 am
Hello ladies.  Queen, I remember  The movie Bebe's kids. It was hilarious.  Oh and


Now Em, Are you saying I will corrupt you all to smoke? Not me, I don't do peer pressure, it would have to be your choice. For those who would consent I guess I would have to roll you joints cause you're amatuer smokers. I, myself smoke blunts because I am The Queen of Green... :D Now when you say statesmen, does that mean they are in politics or they are from where you are?

I like joints myself and will provide my own, but blunts work also. If nobody else will smoke with you, Queen, I will. Been smoking for 22 years.                                                                             Okay, I know I said I Quit as far as dating but check this out. I signed up for POzmatch last night. Immediately got a IM from a guy I talked to once before on the personals. I thought he was a asshole then and I definitely think he's one now. He got mad because I wouldn't go on yahoo and IM him. For one thing that involves downloading stuff(big No-no even though I have my own email, this is not my computer) and I told him that. So he told me I was as bad as the scammers. WTF. I put him on ignore but what a dick.Anyway, I also talked to another fella, he seemed nice.  I like pozpersonals but the features on pozmatch are really cool. But I think it's a trial  basis, then you have to pay. I can't afford that but will play with it while it's free.                          Betty, I sleep at night as well. So I get up and feel like I have missed most of the action and have to catch up. Glad you can talk to about your mom. Time will ease it but it's cool your therapist comes to your house                                                                      Em, that's okay that you confused me with Zacysmom, I still love you. How could I not, you have a great Sense of humor.                       Alright,  2008 ,That would be better for me as well. I can get some money saved and arrange for babysitting.                                                                    Dragonette, Glad to see you back. Niki says you are lovely and I  think that means the same as cool. Hope to meet all of you at some point.  Love ya'll.   Cristy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 24, 2007, 09:07:30 am
edited out cause I was really high and it didn't make sense. Love ya'll Cristy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: camille07 on August 24, 2007, 02:33:24 pm
geez Cindy,

Everytime I log in you're in the catch of the Day.  Do you think you could give someone else a chance LOL :D :D

Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 24, 2007, 05:58:51 pm
Hi GFs~

Hi Camille, yes, I noticed I am even my own Catch sometimes on the home page, lol!  ;)

Oh I am tired today, back is sore from my massage yesterday.  Now Betty is calling me Powder, too, lol!  To answer the question about blood sugar dropping, yes, it can happen, esp if you are getting a full body massage that is pretty intense.  I mean, go figure, all of your major muscle groups and then some, are being worked and your metabolism gets going faster.  So, it makes sense.  I haven't had trouble with it personally over the past 2 months, though.  This is because my neck and upper back are getting the massaging, and its done moderately, for a half hour.  But yes, if you go for an hour or more and they are kneading you like dough, sugar levels can drop.  Always take ibuprofen and drink water before you go.  Push the water in the evening afterwards to flush the released toxins from your system.  I suggest eating a little something before a major massage, to curb the sugar from dropping.

Goodness, now everyone wants to light up at the AMG, lmao!  I actually hate smoking, esp weed (no offense, Q), and won't tolerate sitting in a smoking section at a restaurant.  It just comes from being a non-smoker my entire life, also from seeing Mom high as a kite back in the day when I was little.  Yeah, call me a prude!   :D

SS~  Yes, cleavage is OK, I am still getting used to mine, lol!  I only got boobs from lipo meds over the past two years.  I went off the meds and the boobs stayed.  What luck!  Wish I could get my bubble butt back, but it seems to have gone to my stomach.  Like Mom says "Chin up, tits out" and maybe the stomach won't be noticed, lmao!  Also, thanks for posting about Aunt Flo.  I have had so many issues with bleeding the week before I am supposed to.  Damn liver must be messed up from meds, and therefore the dose of the contraceptives isn't quite enough.  I have been on the pill since 1989 so I am mortified that all of the pain and heavy bleeding will come back!  Thats how it was in college and HS for me.  Used to get tunnel vision on day one, but I am a grown woman now, maybe things have changed some......

Queen~  Who did one of the more popular voices on Bebe's Kids?  Some rapper or someone with a scratchy voice?  I can't recall who it was, just thought it was funny as shit at the time!  LOL

Went to see Stone around 8pm last night and we sat on the couch and talked for awhile.  He offered to buy me a couch and he is on SSDI.  I immediately refused.  We hardly know each other, and a couch isn't a priority, or I would have one already.  We talked about the Fall coming, harvest time, Halloween, corn mazes, I LOVE that stuff!  Fall and winter are my favorite seasons, I don't do well in the heat of summer at all.  Stone also said I would "meet his son, most definitely, " he even invited me over for this weekend to be with the two of them.  I declined, saying it was too early for that.  I am keeping a safe distance as things are still very new with us.  I don't want to rush it, lol, well shit on THAT, huh?  I thought about staying over last night, he invited me to, but I didn't want to be woken up at 7am, even though he said I could stay and sleep in.  I got home around 230am this morning.

It was a nice evening, he hasn't ceased to amaze me more and more each time we talk.  Yes, we actually talk, too!  LOL  I realize I have this stereotype about him now, and its like I am waiting for the bottom to drop out, esp with the hothead thing.  I will take it easy and see what happens.  If things keep going as they are, I will be more comfortable over time.

Edited to add my Scorpio horoscope: "Analyzing risks is one of your strengths, but sometimes in the realm of romance, it can become overanalyzing. Trust your gut feeling and don't be afraid to act on an impulse, get caught up in a moment!"

Well, imagine THAT!  Me?  Overanalyzing, lol!  (I do that ALL of the time.)

~Cindy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 24, 2007, 06:22:57 pm
Hi GFs~



Goodness, now everyone wants to light up at the AMG, lmao!  I actually hate smoking, esp weed (no offense, Q), and won't tolerate sitting in a smoking section at a restaurant.  It just comes from being a non-smoker my entire life, also from seeing Mom high as a kite back in the day when I was little.  Yeah, call me a prude!   :D

!  Wish I could get my bubble butt back, but it seems to have gone to my stomach.  Like Mom says "Chin up, tits out" and maybe the stomach won't be noticed, lmao! 

Went to see Stone around 8pm last night and we sat on the couch and talked for awhile.  He offered to buy me a couch and he is on SSDI.  I immediately refused.  We hardly know each other, and a couch isn't a priority, or I would have one already.  We talked about the Fall coming, harvest time, Halloween, corn mazes, I LOVE that stuff!  Fall and winter are my favorite seasons, I don't do well in the heat of summer at all.  Stone also said I would "meet his son, most definitely, " he even invited me over for this weekend to be with the two of them.  I declined, saying it was too early for that.  I am keeping a safe distance as things are still very new with us.  I don't want to rush it, lol, well shit on THAT, huh?  I thought about staying over last night, he invited me to, but I didn't want to be woken up at 7am, even though he said I could stay and sleep in.  I got home around 230am this morning.

It was a nice evening, he hasn't ceased to amaze me more and more each time we talk.  Yes, we actually talk, too!  LOL  I realize I have this stereotype about him now, and its like I am waiting for the bottom to drop out, esp with the hothead thing.  I will take it easy and see what happens.  If things keep going as they are, I will be more comfortable over time.


~Cindy
Hello, Lovey. Just wanted to respond to a few things. I will always smoke ciggies but never in the room with someone it bothers. I can be very polite and you deserve it.Sorry about the mom thing. The weed is always a outside thing but Queen and I will keep each other company or ya'll can come out with us and just sit a distance away.    You are a very wise woman to take things easy with Stone but I knew you were. Keep doing what you are doing and i love ya.  Cristy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 24, 2007, 09:26:20 pm
I'm sorry, I hope I haven't ruffled any feathers with the smoking thing.  Second-hand smoke gives me a headache, and I will only brave it in bars with a really good band playing, lol.  As long as smokers are mindful of others nearby and not exhaling in their faces, then I am tolerant of it at times, i.e. in a bar situation.

As far as weed, yes, it goes way back with me to when I was a kid growing up in the 70s and 80s.  I knew it was illegal and didn't like the fact that Mom and Dad were "breaking the rules."  I shoulda been a cop, lol.  So, as a child, it sat wrong with me at a very early age, and has stayed that way ever since.

Now, as an adult, I am tolerant of others' choices, as they are not mine to make.  We all have our habits and I respect that.  I just know that I don't like weed.  It was actually one of the reasons I split with an ex, the one before the last one.  Weed wasn't the only reason, but he knew I didn't like it and tried to hide it, etc., so some distrust was forming there, too.  Even to this day, when dating, I ask about weed.  No, Stone doesn't smoke it.  :D

I believe that there is always compromise involved when forming new relationships, whether it be romantically, at the workplace, wherever.  I feel comfortable enough to make my opinion heard, but also to respect others' differences, as I hope all of you will with mine here. 

I can see all of us outside at my parents and whoever wants to go smoke weed just goes for a walk down the driveway.  I may be sitting under the hospitality tent by myself for a half hour, but I still respect everyone's personal choices, esp my Queen's!

Love My GFs!

~Cindy

Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 24, 2007, 09:47:09 pm
Hello Ladies.   Ml, no ruffled feathers here, I was trying to be reassuring. I have many places  that are nonsmoking and I just go outside. I always respect whoever's home I am in.                                             [quote author=MOONLIGHT1114

I can see all of us outside at my parents and whoever wants to go smoke weed just goes for a walk down the driveway.  I may be sitting under the hospitality tent by myself for a half hour, but I still respect everyone's personal choices, esp my Queen's!

Love My GFs!

~Cindy


[/quote]  that sounds like a good plan. We can make things work to everyone's satisfaction and  have the bestest  ;D time. I really hope that we will all be able to get together one day.                 
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 24, 2007, 10:04:19 pm
Hello Ladies~~~

You know I forgot that others smoke, like I am the only one with rights to the weed... ;D And I will always respect a non-smokers wishes unless they are in a smoking section. So not a problem for me to cruise on down aways to puff. Since we all our bring our own bags, we ought to be high as a kite... ;) All I will need is some Arbor Mist or Tequila and Corona to go with the weed but doesn't drink the latter much. So the Mist will win out.

Christy-- Girl, You are better than me, I hated Pozmatch. There were more gay men on there than straight and if there were any straight ones, they lived half way around the world. Now you know you got to at least smoke one blunt with me.

I am glad someone white saw Bebe's kids. Maybe we will have to rent that for Em to see. And us high girls will be in tears even though it is funny without being high. I am going to make it short because I have not had the best day and am really in a mood... :-[
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 24, 2007, 10:16:48 pm
Queen, Sorry it's a bad day for you.Hope tomorrow is better for you.  I'm not quite sure if the Pozmatch thing will work out but I'm gonna keep on trying. If ML can find Stone and Camille, Ian, surely I'll find someone eventually.They inspire me as you all do. Later.  Cristy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 24, 2007, 11:49:49 pm
I am lonely tonight, haven't heard from Stone all day except for one horny IM at 8pm (hey that rhymes.....).  He was taking Jr out to dinner.  I saw him sign off a little while ago, but he hasn't called.   I am down and dumpy tonight myself, dammit.  Lonely and bored here.....
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 24, 2007, 11:54:05 pm
Good night. Good news. Mr. Reconstituted from Poz' site, wrote again!! Well, well. Cristy, the "elder statesman" (GQ -- just used that term because he looks as if he could hang with politicians of a senatorial type) is from Florida not DC. But, with the recent uptick of Mr. R, I'm amused and enthused. Seems like a fairly normal, hardworking father of two, who is separated and en route to divorce. With his work schedule, this will take a while to get to know him. Night night. Em
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 25, 2007, 01:26:55 am
Cin-
  I don't smoke weed either.  I used to when I was a teen-ager.  I tried a few times as an adult, but it always made me paranoid as shit. 
 
Sorry you and Queen are having a bad night.  I hope things look up for ya'all! :-* :-*
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 25, 2007, 01:44:31 am
I ate a bowl of clam chowder with Old Bay and Queen had a potato.  We both gorged ourselves and we're still grumpy...........   :(    ???
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 25, 2007, 07:34:07 am
Maybe you guys are tired and need a long rest. ;)
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 25, 2007, 10:01:54 am
Hello Ladies. I got up late this morning. I usually get up around 7 but guess I needed to sleep.  Queen and ML, Sorry ya'll didn't feel well last night. It must be hard having both HIV and Diabetes. I admire you for your upbeat attitudes in the face of all that.                                        Em, So Mr Statesman contacted you. Not sure who he is but wish you the best of luck. We ALL deserve to be happy.  My needy one from Florida stopped his drive-by calling several weeks ago, when I told him he has too many issues and drama for me to deal with.                             Queen, You may be right about Pozmatch. Nothing seems to be popping there either.                                                                        ML, sorry you were lonely. It's a good sign that Stone takes his responsibilities seriously. And that he wants to spend time with his son. You seem to have gotten a good one.                                                      Betty, I promise I won't smoke around you. I hate being paranoid and would not inflict that on anyone.  But I would still love to meet you all. well, I'll check back in later.  Love to you all.  Cristy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 25, 2007, 10:17:01 am
Morning all:
  I've been having a rough time lately.  Missing my mum I think.  Last night I fell asleep around 8:00 p.m., then got up at 12:30 a.m., back to sleep at 2:30 a.m., up at 5:30 a.m., then took an hour's nap.  I was thinking of going to an NA meeting this morning, but I'm too emotionally wore out.  I keep catching myself calling my mum on the phone, then realizing she's not there anymore (by not there, I mean not physically there).  I sure miss talking to her in the mornings. 

Other than that, I start two new classes next week.  "Counseling Theories" and "Introduction to Philosophy."  Hopefully in a year I'll have my bachelor's in psychology.  I already have an associate's in law enforcement and got a certificate in medical assisting.  Those were years ago.  I never did become a full-fledged cop.  I was a single mother when I applied to the Michigan State Police.  I passed the written, oral and hearing part of the exam.  They told me they would send me to their academy in Kalamazoo.  At the time, I was naive as to state police being able to send someone anywhere in the state; I thought I would be able to stay in my little home town.  They said "Oh, no.  Every new officer goes to Detroit for 2-5 years."  That put the nix on that.  I was a medical transcriptionist for years before going on SSDI. 

I guess everybody must be sleeping.  I hope my sleeping gets evened out pretty soon.  Talk to ya'all later.
Peace-
Betty
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 25, 2007, 10:45:32 am
Hello Betty. Sorry you are not sleeping well. It really  makes life hard when your sleep pattern is messed up.                                                Maybe you should go to a meeting, I remember being told that the time to go is when you don't want to.      I am so sorry about your mom. I remember after my Grandpa died in 2004( we were very close)I used to pick up the phone to call him and the remember that he wasn't there.It was very hard to accept .                                          Hooray for the classes. Education is good. I hope they go smoothly and you get your Bachelor degree. I'll be on for a few more minutes if you want to talk.    Later. Cristy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 25, 2007, 11:06:04 am
Hey Cristy:
  Didn't go to the meeting-went back to bed instead.  Now it's almost lunch time, although I don't feel like eating.  If it wasn't for the fact that I have to keep up a regular eating schedule for the diabetes, I wouldn't. :P  Maybe I'll bake some brownies today (NOT those kind ;)).  Anyway, I hope you're having a good day.  Talk to you soon.
Peace-
Betty
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 25, 2007, 01:10:53 pm
Hi GFs~

Gosh, a lot of us are diabetic.  Me, Queen, Betty....who else?  Queen, did you have an appt this past Tuesday?  How did it go?   I remember reading in here that you had one coming up, but I haven't heard about it from you.  Are you getting your Lantus pens soon, too? 

Betty, sorry to hear about the whacked sleep schedule.  Mine has been so bad over the past three weeks.  If I get up by 11am I consider it early.  Its just awful.  I don't know how I'll ever get back to work, if I ever even get a job.  I applied to four more yesterday, hoping that something will come up since summer help is going back to school now.  This seems to be the time of year when employers hire, they wing it thru the summer until junior goes back to school, and then hire a full-timer in the fall.  BTW, I have an undergrad in PSYC.  It was a very interesting major.  I also like Criminal Justice and forensics interested me a lot, too, although I know I couldn't hack it with that shit in real life.  Spooky!

I still think about my husband, my grandmother, my dog, as if they were all still here.  It sounds funny, but esp my dog, because she lived with me not too long ago.  I keep thinking I hear her tags jingling and its just Cheech doing something.   It takes awhile for the separation to set in, and I don't think we ever fully have it, the separation, I mean.  Some people, or pets, will always feel like they are here with us.  I think that's OK, that its a good thing. 

Stone called today at noon.  He needs to go pick up one of his trucks from the shop.  He told me his work truck doesn't have AC!  It was as hot as balls here yesterday in Maryland and he was out working with no AC in between jobs.  Today the heat index is already past 100degrees, temp is at 90 and supposed to go to 100, so what does that mean for the heat index later?  I hope we don't have a brown-out or something.  I'll have to camp out in my basement.

Hang in there, GFs, and stay cool today.  I'm not mowing the lawn, they'd have to call 911 for me!

Edited to add SCAMMER!:   Message from: alfred_matt  

Subject: Hello my moon light
Sent: Aug 25, 2007 8:18 AM (FLID:)
I will call you that because I most confess that I want to marry you I don't want to know the state of your state I know but of us are diagnosed Pls reply me I want to know you better my MY name is fred my number is +2348032459142 I live in Nigeria now I want to met you light


I simply replied, "You are one desperate fuck."

~Cindy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 25, 2007, 02:31:21 pm
Hello Ladies. Betty,  I didn't realize that you have diabetes also. I do have to admire those that deal with other health issues in addition to the HIV.  Make yourself eat so you will stay healthy. Brownies sound good, maybe I will make some. Never made brownies with anything in them exceptlots and lots of extra chocolate  :D. Usually I only get 1 or 2 and my family gobbles up the rest. Especially mom and robert. So no additives.                                                                                           Moon, thanks for the scammer update.  Who is Chris? I'm assuming Stone but am not sure.  I think about my Grandparents alot and I had this Cat(his name was Jibari) that passed in 2004. He was the best pet I ever had and he kept me company through my last pregnancy. Slept, ate  whenever I did. I miss him.    Anyway, talk to ya'll later.  Cristy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 25, 2007, 04:02:00 pm
I hate scammers like the one you mentioned, Cin.  I get those every once in awhile on poz.com.  Gotta watch out for 'em.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 25, 2007, 07:33:02 pm
Hello Girls~~

I have been in a mood because I may end up losing my new place because after calling the gas company and knowing I have a previous bill. I did not take that into account but I am trying to be fair with my room mate because she is getting the lights on in her name and the cable is also in my name. The gas company doesn't want to tell what I need to pay to get the gas turned on unless I get a lease from my landlord and my room mate has to call down there with her information. I am like WTF? Shit has really changed since the last time I had gas. I called my landlord to explain this and see if I could make some type of payment since I couldn't follow through on the original agreement. He said no but if housing assistance will cover it then it would be ok. I am thinking they may because I have my son with me but when I dealt with them before in the past, they turned me down saying I made too much from disability...Oh, really? They should try living off of disability. But at that time my son wasn't living with me. So now on Monday I have to get up bright and early and apply for housing assistance. Wish me luck there.

I did get the lantus pen, insulin cartridges, and needles approved through my insurance company but doesn't have the money for the co- pays to get them out. I won't be able to get them til the 31st, then I'll be able to schedule for the diabetes class. My sugars has been doing decent by me. With the recent daily testing, the highest I think was 170 something but don't hold me to that, I smoke weed... ;D My glucometer records it. But I am proud of myself by sticking to the daily routine. I am usually not good at those sort of things. I really hate taking the pills due to the side effects and feels since I have been closely monitoring that the lantus pen would be a good thing for me. Stick myself once a day, I can do that. I've been doing it with my glucometer 2-3 times a day now.

Betty~~ I feel you on missing your mother. My father has been away from me for 3 years now and I still think of him every day. But I still talk to him from time to time, not that I am crazy but what I believe in. I believe that those love ones who have passed have become our guardians, they watch over us and your mother is doing the same for you.

I hate to say it but I am still in a stressed mood. I can't even enjoy my high and I am trying to. A friend woke me up inviting me up to smoke, she knows what's going on. Being in such a mood, I slammed a Colt 45 and I paid for it....instant headache. There was a sliver of sunshine though...I got a voicemail from Boo, he called my cell phone and he was waiting on my call....OH FUCK!!!! He hasn't been online because his computer is messing up again. And I can't call him back on cell cause I don't have long distance and I can't on house phone even though I do have long distance but the feedback is terrible from my hearing aids.....DAMN IT TO HELL....Why can't I get a moment of happiness? :'( Although Powder made my day.... ;)

There is another issue that is bothering me but I will post that in a different thread. I just wish I didn't feel this way, I don't like it and I know what it could be doing to my body...Grrrrrrrr...... >:(
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 25, 2007, 11:32:53 pm
Oh dear Queen:
  I do hope you can get the help you need to move into your new place.  Have you talked to your roommate about the gas bill?  I wonder if she would be willing to get it in her name or help out so you guys can get it turned on?  I am sending love your way! 
   {{{{HUGS}}}}
Thanks for the words about your father's passing and how it affects you now.  It is hard.  I used to talk to my mom several times a day and I really miss that.

I hope the pen does good for you.  I'm so used to giving myself shots of Insulin in the stomach, it's like second nature.  My blood sugars have been running high lately, but I've been on kind of a binge, I'm sure for emotional reasons.  Have to get that under control real soon, because I've seen some of the horrors of what uncontrolled diabetes can do when I was in a nursing home.  I don't want any amputated limbs or to have to go on dialysis any time soon!  So good luck on that.

I hope all you girls are having a good evening.  More later or tomorrow I guess, as no one seems to be on here right now.
Peace-
Betty
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: zachysmom on August 25, 2007, 11:38:18 pm
Hi all.
Really sad to hear so many of you deal with other health issuses as well. Talk about overload....the stress would kill me alone, I really don't know how you all hang in there on a daily basis.......but God Bless You for hanging in there.
Betty,
I miss my mom as well, she lives in another city 6 hours away, she's older and going through health issuses as well, and I feel so shitty that i'm not  there for her, as I was in the past,( my brother isn't much of a help to her, he's dealing with an Autisic child). So not only do I miss her, I feel constrained to help her. But such is life sometimes.
Cindy,
Keep your chin up about work, perhaps try working your resume' to broaden your field of interest, and possible career change, maybe?
I too minored in Psych, but My Major was Mass Communications, with Public relations options I still have not completed my degree ( I got pregnant and had to stop attending full time), however one day I will achieve my goal.....the funny thing is I was actually going to apply to be a 911 dispatcher before I got this job........I quess there are alot of us with the same morbid ( as my husband calls me ) disposition :P. I love watching shows about addiction (of any kind..i.e drugs, sex, gambling.), medical mysteries, police dramas, you name it etc....
Who loves to watch Discovery Health Channel? (me raising my hand).....Me......


Later gators,
Nicole
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 26, 2007, 12:23:00 am
Hey Nicole (That's my daughter's name)-
  I bet you like Court T. V. as well if you like police dramas.  I like to watch "Intervention" from time to time.  I really like Law & Order also.  I can't wait until the new season starts!  But I really miss Jerry Orbach. 

That's rough, Nic, being away from your mom.  I helped take care of my mom right up until her death and would spend the night over there all the time when she needed someone in there 24 hours.  But I have a sister who lives in Phoenix (my mom lived in Michigan) and it was really rough on her.  Luckily toward the end of my mom's life, my sister got to fly home to be a part of it.  My mum passed very peacefully with all her children and my father, her husband of 58 years, around her. 

Now, my first husband's death wasn't as pretty, I'm sure.  I was in treatment for drug and alcohol abuse at the time.  It was in February of 1989.  I tested positive for HIV and three days later they told me he died.  He had HIV, but that's not what killed him, alcoholism did.  It caused his heart to stop.  And he was 29.  That was pretty rough also.  I think it took like a year to year and a half for me to get emotionally back to normal.

I wonder if Powder is out with Stone.  Hmmmmmm
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: sunseeker on August 26, 2007, 12:25:45 am
Hi Girls

I am going to keep this short I am PMSing and am going to go to bed.  Sorry to all of you that have lost a loved one.  My grandma just died two months ago but I was really not close to her. I really feel bad for my mother.  I am really close to my mother and father and could not imagine them not being around.  My mother is also going through some health issues and hope she can get everthing straightend out.

Hi Bettytacy my thoughts are with you and I hope you are feeling better.  Its ironic that there is three of us who have been interested in law enforcement.  Moon and Zach and me who is law enforcement.  I often think of going back to school to do forensics but then most agencies around my area want you to be a police officer and and not a civilian.  Oh such is life.

Queen -  I am sorry to here about your new place.  I hope you get things straightened out.  But hey look on the bright side, I am sure you had a smile on your face when you got the message from Boo.

Moon- hope you are doing well and I hope you are not to lonely.  Just think of Stone and that should make things all better.

Going to take a midol or a vicodin and go to bed.  Have a great night

K



Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 26, 2007, 01:41:06 am
Oh dear Queen:
  I do hope you can get the help you need to move into your new place.  Have you talked to your roommate about the gas bill?  I wonder if she would be willing to get it in her name or help out so you guys can get it turned on?  I am sending love your way! 
   {{{{HUGS}}}}
Thanks for the words about your father's passing and how it affects you now.  It is hard.  I used to talk to my mom several times a day and I really miss that.

I hope the pen does good for you.  I'm so used to giving myself shots of Insulin in the stomach, it's like second nature.  My blood sugars have been running high lately, but I've been on kind of a binge, I'm sure for emotional reasons.  Have to get that under control real soon, because I've seen some of the horrors of what uncontrolled diabetes can do when I was in a nursing home.  I don't want any amputated limbs or to have to go on dialysis any time soon!  So good luck on that.

I hope all you girls are having a good evening.  More later or tomorrow I guess, as no one seems to be on here right now.
Peace-
Betty

My room mate doesn't get much more than me on disability. She is going to get the electric on and pay her half of the rent. If she got the gas on too it wouldn't leave her with any money. There is an option that I am looking into and hoping they can cover the bill.

After my brother had a few strokes, he's diabetic too but thinks he is invincible and when he did decide to start taking his insulin it was just a bit too late. That was a wake up call for me even though I was taking mine just not the way they were prescribed. I don't want to have to worry about amputation or dialysis either.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 26, 2007, 02:00:41 am
Hi GFs~

I am here, was on the "phone with Stone" for a couple of hours.  He hasn't asked me out again for this coming week, but said he was sure he would talk to me tomorrow.  Weather is supposed to be 79 degrees here next Sat on Labor Day weekend and Stone does NOT have his son that weekend!  :P  Planning ahead for some fun with that full moon coming this week! 

It was 110 here today with the heat index and there is this 7yo kid that lives in the apt complex where Stone is.  Evidently, the kid's father tells him to go outside in the morning and not come back until its dark.  Stone has fed this kid a few times cause his parents haven't fed him breakfast or lunch.  Today Stone invited him inside to play with his son in the AC and then took them both to the pool.  He's considering calling child welfare services but doesn't want anyone retaliating and messing with his trucks.  He thinks the hood will point the finger at him.  I can't say I blame him.

Good thing is, school starts Monday, so the kid will have some supervision during the day, that is, if he even makes it to school.  Stone has a ground floor apt and this kid comes to the back porch and knocks on the sliding glass door all the time.  Today Stone had to run some errands and when he and his son returned this kid was waiting on the steps for them to return.  Stone says sometimes he looks out the window and the kid is sitting on his patio chairs there.  Its really sad that some young parents can't even take care of their kid, and they don't care where he is all day.  This has been going on for months now.  Breaks my heart to hear about it.

OK, GFs, I need a vote here.  What's your opinion?  I have always been a numbers girl, bookkeeper, organizer, office manager, hold down the fort kinda girl, in my previous jobs.  Many times over the years people have suggested I go into sales because of my conservative look and my personality.  I have never dared because I have been too afraid to work on commission, and I have never wanted to push a product on people.  However, office jobs around here are rare and don't pay well at all anymore.  I want to be recognized for my achievements, so....

How do you think I would do at selling cars?  Rumor has it you can earn 100K around here selling new cars.  I would be happy earning 40K!

Yep, Stone thinks I would be great at this and I think, "Who would want to buy a car from a woman?"  He says women are kinder, gentler, more detail-oriented than men, more approachable, and that's why we do better as real estate agents, etc.  There is a brand new Toyota dealership about 3 miles from my house that needs a salesperson, right off the highway, where people from down county come.  People down the road are wealthier towards DC, and always try to save a buck by trickling up to my area. 

I guess with selling cars, people already come to look because they have the idea to buy on their mind, so you don't have to push too hard.  They already know what they want, pretty much.  I AM great at talking with people and I think the numbers girl thing and a knack for details would help. 

Has anyone here ever sold cars, or know anyone, male or female, that has?  I am in a busy DC suburb, so the location is good.  The dealership is advertising because they need help with all of the new sales coming in.  I don't know what to think.  Thing is, if I got my foot in the door and didn't do well, I am still getting unemployment in the meantime, until the end of the year.  Also, you really just "represent" the dealership and then someone else usually closes the sale, either a sales manager or a finance guy, right?  I'm good with people, very pleasant, not pushy, love to help others, and I am very respectful of their needs, so I wouldn't push, well not too hard.

Let me know your thoughts!  I may go talk with the sales manager this week, act like I'm buying a car and ask to speak with him, stake out the place a little first.

~Cindy   "Will work for food."   :(

Edited to add:  I am kinda freaking out, took my last pill today after being on them (oral contraceptives) since I was 19!  I am a nerd with numbers, GFs!  (7/2/89  to  8/25/07)  That's a damn long time.  I'll be like Medusa or something 6 weeks from now!  Will I lose weight from this?    ;D
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 26, 2007, 07:50:15 am
Cindy

If you could get a gig with a dealership, and stick it out, it could be good for you. In my city, we've got some women in car sales who do just fine. But, like anything else, it's a low man on totem pole start as you build your knowledge and, your customer base (especially for the repeaters and referrals.)

With your background? Hell, you'd be closing the sales before long and a manager would love your ability with numbers.

In addition to checking out that dealership as a pseudo-customer, also call around and ask all of the major dealerships if they have any women reps (you can say, you'd really prefer to buy a car from a woman) and if so, get their names and call or visit them.

There's rarely a time in life when someone isn't flattered that you would seek their opinion of their industry, the specific job process, etc. Pick the person's brains. I KNOW you would be good at that! Find out how long it was before they were making the kind of money they wanted to make.

Hell, why not? There's an old business-ism that the only avenue for people to make doctor/lawyer type money is through sales and largely, it's true.
Plus, you could get a dealership vroom-vroom to drive in.

Full throttle. Em
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 26, 2007, 07:57:56 am
Call it a good omen. I found this article for you which, uncanny enough, was published TODAY about women in the automotive industry and sales!! This might help you as you do your research.

http://www.c-n.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070826/NEWS/708260302
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 26, 2007, 04:03:37 pm
Call it a good omen. I found this article for you which, uncanny enough, was published TODAY about women in the automotive industry and sales!! This might help you as you do your research.

http://www.c-n.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070826/NEWS/708260302


Em~

You ROCK!  That article echos a lot of what I was already thinking.....Nice to see my good "common sense" in an article, lol!   :P   I think I need to visit that dealership this week.   Hell, it sounds like they really DO look for women salespeople, like we're the diamonds in the rough.  I have had little fears of being turned away because of being female and not having experience.  Maybe I can have a heart-to-heart with the sales manager and interview HIM!   :D
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 26, 2007, 07:44:41 pm
You do realize this career path would mean surrendering your self-assigned title of closet Metal Head and commandeering a Motor Head Thread. You would  be expected to advise us on which cars are good, which are bad, how to navigate the service tech tango and so moto-more!!
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 26, 2007, 07:57:25 pm
I have no problem being a Motor Head, my Dad builds race car engines, so I know some "lingo" already!

Couldn't help but think of the band Motorhead first, tho!  Saw them in concert in 2003, "Ace of Spades, the Ace of Spades...."

OK, I digress.......   :P

Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 26, 2007, 08:04:23 pm
When I think of race car engines, Cin and Em, I think of Judas Priest's song "Screaming for Vengance" when the singer lets out that long, hurdling "SCREEEEEEEEMAN!"
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 26, 2007, 08:32:39 pm
When I think of race car engines, Cin and Em, I think of Judas Priest's song "Screaming for Vengance" when the singer lets out that long, hurdling "SCREEEEEEEEMAN!"


Didn't they also do one called "Free Wheel Burnin'"...........?  LOL
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 26, 2007, 09:56:30 pm
Ok, should I chime in here? I really don't do metal nor am I a race car fan. I couldn't take it when I lived in Miami and there is no way I could stand it with my hearing aids. But since we are mentioning songs and cars. My mind went to his Royal Badness...Prince and Lil Red Corvette... ;D
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 27, 2007, 02:39:33 am
Stone used to drive a little red corvette.......    :P   I need to work him into next weekend's plans somehow.   We just spoke on the phone for 3 hours tonight.  He takes things one day at a time, and I am always planning ahead, lol.

~Cindy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 27, 2007, 05:44:36 am
Dammit, I am in a dark place tonight, and its already morning.  I posted in the main threads cause I am scared and don't know what to do.  I need to get a job, but my health is screwed up and I am scared to death now.  I tried to sleep for an hour and kept tossing and turning and panicking.  Is it this damn Sustiva making me feel like this? 

Earlier tonight I was jumping and dancing around to a favorite tune and now I am in a dark place.  Fuck it all.  I am taking a time out today and curling up.  Cancelling my appointment with the chiropractor.  What is one more visit gonna do?  That's all I have left on this damn insurance until the new year.  Dammit, I even told Stone he could move in with me as a roommate.  Boy would that be a conflict of interest!  Or a safe haven?  I don't know anymore.  I hate this shit.     :'(     :'(     :'(     :'(    :'(
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Dragonette on August 27, 2007, 06:21:41 am
ML,

I replied you in the living with. But I will just talk about Sustiva here. Yes, it can mess with your mind big time, I was amazed at the difference when I changed it a couple months ago (still f***ed up but not suffering as much and far less sleep problems), and I wasn't even one of the more obvious cases of a bad effect. I think sustiva is like a weight on your brain so when things are good you can handle them but when things are shaky it makes them much worse. A little like weed (for me, eventually, which was why I quit it after 10 years smoking). It's very individual though but don't overlook it. It gives strange dreams and the quality of sleep is damaged. Most people quit it just b/c of the mental/sleep side effects (based on hearing evidence not research here).

a doc told me that all HAART doses are for a 80 kg male patient and b/c women are usually smaller and with different metabolism we suffer more than the men, for example, combivir makes more women anemic than men. you can check the sustiva levels in the blood to see if they are too high as well.

I have to add, Queen... speaking of Little Red Corvette, who did I see perform it last week in London? You guessed it, the little genius himself. It was just awsome!!


Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 27, 2007, 07:27:00 am
ML, It might just be the Sustiva but it might also be that you  are nervous for good reason. Looking for a job is very stressful. And asking Stone to move in even on a roommate basis would have me freaking. I think that you would be good in sales.If you like restaurant work, try a fine dining restaurant where you can work part-time and sale wine. If not, then the car dealership thing might be good. you have a very  outgoing personality, which would serve you well in that respect. And you are very pretty, which is always a benefit when working with people. Hope you get to feeling better.   Cristy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 27, 2007, 07:29:36 am
TY, Cristy.  I am still awake, haven't gone to bed yet   :-\   Finally got the dog back on schedule with his meds tho.   :D   Used to give him that stuff at 730am before I'd go to work.  This is messed up.  WTF am I doing?    ???
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 27, 2007, 07:50:26 am
ML, I have nights I can't sleep especially if I am stressing hard. Hang in there GF, it will get better. Maybe a housecleaning spree or some physical activity to tire your brain and that way when you go to sleep tonight, you will sleep like a log.     Love ya.  Cristy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: sunseeker on August 27, 2007, 10:38:45 am
Hi ML

I am sorry to hear that you are in a dark place.  I was there last week.  I know when I am stressed out I can't sleep and I am not sure if its the meds or not.  I just know i am never able to sleep when I have something important to do the next day then it messes up my whole day. What about joining a temp agency and working for them?  I know a lot of people who have started working for a temp agency then got full time employment out of it.  Well, if nothing else works, how about a pint of your favorite ice cream.  That usually works for me.   Good Luck ML I will send you my good thoughts and mojo. xoxox
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 27, 2007, 11:24:32 am
Of course a pint of ice cream probably isn't the best thing for a diabetic. :o   I'm sure our Cin is sleeping right now, haven't noticed her on the forums for awhile.  I'm thinking of taking a nap as I'm in a really pissy, bitchy mood right now and I shouldn't be, especially since Alberto Gonzalez has just turned in his resignation.  Hooray! :D
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 27, 2007, 03:58:05 pm
Of course a pint of ice cream probably isn't the best thing for a

Oh, for the love of...that's all I needed was to see the mention of ice cream today. I'm going to the store as soon as I post this to get some damn I-deserve-it-just-cuz Ice Cream. It's my favorite brand.

You know what? Just the language, " I'm in a dark place." might have some literal tie to the changing of season/sunlight exposure. ML, do you have access to someone's sunning lamp---the type used to address SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder)? If so, try to use it for 10-15 minutes a day in the morning, do some outdoor walking (for the activity and tiring factor), set a time past which you WILL NOT be on the phone or on the computer so that your mind has a chance to truly wind down. This internet shit is addictive for most of us.

Make your bedroom a true haven of calm. If there's a TV in there, cover it with a piece of fabric (Feng Shui would dictate moving it out, but covering it is a compromise), have some warm milk before bed if you can handle milk, maybe some light, meditative reading. For the near term, you'll be on Sustiva and it's a known fact that what you do before night-night with that med can influence the dream content.

Soothing music, meditation, pretty pictures, are noted to set up a calming effect before sleep.

And, during your awake hours, why not start to plan the Yellow Brick Road to your next job. Where would you like to go? With whom should you meet to get there?

If ANY of us are sleep-deprived we will go to that chemically-driven, crappy cave of gloom that magnifies every piece of negative mental lint we've got.

If necessary, get a sleep aid prescribed to you. Having noted your references to lengths of calls with Stone, and having seen the times of many of your posts, you'll have to do your part to unhitch from technology in order to help re-establish some good sleep habits.

Although not on meds, I've had to do this which is why I can yack about it. A dear friend of mine says it very simply......" Sleep is your friend."  And, he's right!

All the best. Wishing you fluffy pillows.
Em
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 27, 2007, 06:57:32 pm
Hi GFs~

Sorry I've been such a whining shitball lately.  Yes, I agree I need more physical activity.  I mowed the backyard yesterday and almost keeled over from the humidity here!  I put in my other post about how I wanted to exercise 20 minutes a night.  I agree it will help with the exhaustion factor.  I have always been a planner, have always had a schedule....I think its been ingrained in my brain from an early age because of being diabetic.  Test here, shot there, now eat, test again....and so on. 

I am out of whack cause I don't have a job to keep me on schedule.  I'll just think of it as spring break, Lord knows I have needed some down time, but its been over three months, so time to get hopping!  I think I need to go see people face to face for a job and sell myself that way.  On a piece of paper I may just be blending in with everyone else.  My personality can sell itself, I am sure.  (I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.... lol). 

Hey as far as ice cream, there is a new one out by Edy's, kind of in a light blue container.  I forget what its called but it focuses on overload or excess or indulgence cause of all the crap they put in there, lol.  I have choc chip cookie dough downstairs, lol.  All I have to do is dial a dose on the insulin pump, lol.  I'm glad my ass isn't any wider from sitting home this summer, but I was hiking before the hotter days in July got here.

As far as "dark places" and SAD.....  I LOVE the fall and winter.  I am so excited that September is this weekend.  It will still be hot here, but fall is coming!  I think I am depressed from sitting inside because its been so hot.  I am very fair and don't do well in the heat, either does Cheech with his long coat.  Maybe I can take him for a hike tomorrow on the mountain.  Its all shaded and in the forest so it wouldn't be so bad.  We both have cabin fever!

Goodness, its 7pm?  Have to get ready for bed soon!  ;) 

I am REALLY going to try and better myself.  Now if I could just find a job that paid $17 - $18 an hour I would be happy.  Everyone is offering under 30K around here lately.  Well, they'll get what they pay for, an inexperienced student.......I will hold out a little longer, I still have cash, thank goodness!

~Cindy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 27, 2007, 07:09:30 pm

l just think of it as spring break, Lord knows I have needed some down time, but its been over three months, so time to get hopping!  I think I need to go see people face to face for a job and sell myself that way.  On a piece of paper I may just be blending in with everyone else.  My personality can sell itself, I am sure.  (I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.... lol). 

As far as "dark places" and SAD.....  I LOVE the fall and winter.  I am so excited that September is this weekend. 

Cin,
Quick note before I hop off. Yes, go in person!! We deal with you in print and WE get who you are, so by all means knock 'em out in person. Second, re: SAD---has NOTHING to do with whether you like fall or winter, it has to do with physiological reactions to less light hence the use of light boxes. I love fall/winter, too, but find that when I REMEMBER to use the damn thing it's beneficial. Finally, even if you listed yourself with a temp agency, it would ease you back out into the flow, demand that you get up and get out. I have a friend, who for years has temped and finds it's a fabulous way to find exactly where she would and would not want to work. Invariably, she gets offers as a result of temping. Just a thought to add to the creative slurry you're mixing.
Take good care.
Em
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 27, 2007, 07:16:00 pm
LOL, um, forgot to add.....A temp agency placed me near home in March, when I left the PA job.  In May the stint was over.  I am listed with 5 temp agencies, and I look waaaaaay down my nose at them now.  They haven't done shit for me.  I am over-qualified.

~Cindy

*****SCAMMER ALERT******

Message from: tokunbodacosta  

Subject: Hello
Sent: Aug 26, 2007 12:14 PM (FLID:)
Hello, I saw your profile and i was deligthed to contact you,because your profile fit into the perfect woman i want to meet and be with. I am a young guy in my late twenties {29Years}.I am a black british.I have warndered around in search of a true love but i have seen any yet till today.but a friend talked about this dating site and i decided to have a look and hoping to be sucessfull. I would like to know you better and you tell me about yourself. Do not think the distance is a barrieir as i am ready to move around if you do want to meet me for real.I will send you some of my pictures as soon as we get to know each other better. have a nice day and kindly get back to me on akmoney_01@YAHOO.COM. Tokunbo


I simply replied, "Sure!  When can we meet for dinner or something?!?!?!"  He is in London, GFs......  :D
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 27, 2007, 09:07:37 pm
 >:( How much more do I have to take? I got turned down for the housing assistance. I actually went there twice after getting a letter from my manager here which said if I didn't put my son out that I would be evicted due to breaking the lease. When I went back the second time, the case worker said the letter was no good because it says it will evict me if I don't put my son out. Then she said, well can't you let him stay somewhere else for awhile. What? :o I told her nicely that would be fraud considering I get cash from assistance for my son. And the lady I saw first thing in the morning, gave me a list of places to call....Zippo there. The one place on the list hadn't received housing funds in over 5 years and said he was getting irritated with housing assistance referring them. After being denied the first time, I broke out in tears in front of the woman, I couldn't help it.

I did get some news from the gas company. I found out today that my nephew when he moved into his apt had gas on in both our names. Here if you get service on and there is another adult present then their name has to go on the bill too. I had a previous gas bill from before but when I spoke to them today, they were saying that it is from my nephew's address where I had never set foot in. When I question the lady at the gas company about this, she said that I had signed the Liara application which is a program that helps you with your bill. For one I never signed the application for that address and this is a program where you have to reapply every year. But I am also amazed that they did not ask this person who was suppose to be me for any ID even if my nephew was the primary name on the bill. Of course after getting this from the gas company, I called my sister and left her a message telling her that her son better pay the bill or I'm pressing charges. I get called back and told that they tacked my bill on to his from my old apartment,which is bullshit because back then no one was added to the bill, it was just in my name. Then she goes on to say that she saw the paper herself and that she knows my handwriting. But she also had to mention, yeah cause you marked your disability as being immnio something, she said. That was her AIDS reminder. So now I have to file Identity Theft paperwork and I can't get any gas on in my place til they finish their investigation. If I didn't peep the address on the denial paper I would've had to pay 200 bucks to get service. Now I am  left with no gas.

At the moment, I am feeling very frustrated and disgusted. I can relate to Powder being in a dark place because I really want to hurt something right now!!!!!!!!!
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 28, 2007, 08:02:53 am
LOL, um, forgot to add.....A temp agency placed me near home in March, when I left the PA job.  In May the stint was over.  I am listed with 5 temp agencies, and I look waaaaaay down my nose at them now.  They haven't done shit for me.  I am over-qualified.

~Cindy

ML: I should add that my friend was nearly always over-qualified for positions she took. Once inside, they had a chance to get to know her and see what she was capable of. It was merely a way of entering, earning and learning.
GQ: Very sorry to learn of the housing letter and gas company outcome. However, it sounds like the gas company fucked up and should own up. Did they give you a copy of the signed document? Even though this is crappy timing for you (spirit-wise) combined with the housing issue, if the gas company took a fraudulently signed document, without verifying the identity of the signer, you may have the leverage you could use to get them to expedite the investigation. Mention that your lawyer suggested you see the original and have a copy. The other thing is the local paper and/or a television station typically has a consumer watchdog person whom you might enlist to assist--or, just mention it to the gas company that you've been advised to do this. That might light a fire (pun intended) under someone's ass to get it done.

I hope both of you come out of your dark places soon.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 28, 2007, 08:12:16 am
ML: For whatever it's worth, if I lived where you live, had the background you have both educationally and professionally, the experiences you've had, physiologically, and continue to have, etc., then

I would explore if there's anything available at the NIH. http://www.nems.nih.gov/home/frederick.cfm

Em
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: camille07 on August 28, 2007, 08:46:31 am
hey ladies-

Cindy- I think that's a great idea about you being in the automotive industry.  Selling cars may be just your thing.   I think you should at least give it a shot or else you'll never know.  I think keeping you busy may get you out of the dark place you've been residing.  I went through it about a month ago.  I swear if I saw a chipmunk I would start to cry.  But its not a crying state of being it's just a depression that is hard to shake...or comes in waves.  We're all here for ya girlfriend.  We know what you're going through and it sucks being a woman in this respect.  Our darn hormones can have a big affect on our moods.  I"m 38 so I know that menopause is right around the corner.  (whooo hooo can't wait grrrrrrrr)

Queen-  Sorry about all the housing issues.  It is a scary situation, I'm sure, facing eviction.   Hang in there, things will change.


Big hugs out to the rest of you hens:  em, bT, sun, cjc, and drag

Love Cammie
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 28, 2007, 11:01:45 am
Good morning ladies:
   Wow, Queen, I sure hope things change for the better pretty soon.  It sounds really overwhelming.  Isn't there anyone in the public sector you can get ahold of about this?  I agree that the gas company should be held partly responsible, besides your nephew, in this.  They fucked up.  I'm sending lots of positive energy your way. 
   Moonlight, you mentioned in another post, in another thread, that you don't see how anyone can make it getting, what was it, $1300/month?  I get $865.  I had to go through bankrupcy twice and swallow my pride.  If you can work, then by all means do.  I tell people not to go on disability unless one absolutely has to.  I only make 1/4 of what I made when I was working.  I hope you're feeling better.  Sending positive energy your way to.  Did you see the eclipse?  I missed it. 
    I start classes full-time tonight.  Taking "Counseling Theories" and "Intro to Philosophy."  Kind of looking forward to them, as I need to keep busy right now with my mom's passing etc.  If I'm not busy, then I get depressed.  And I know me.  When I'm down about something, everything else gets exaggerated. 
    Hope everyone's doing alright.
Peace-
Betty
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 28, 2007, 12:43:24 pm
ML: For whatever it's worth, if I lived where you live, had the background you have both educationally and professionally, the experiences you've had, physiologically, and continue to have, etc., then

I would explore if there's anything available at the NIH. http://www.nems.nih.gov/home/frederick.cfm

Em

Oh girl!  Haven't read the link yet, but seeing "NIH" makes me think of one thing:  TRAFFIC.  It is horrible around here.  I am really pissed about my neck and the fact that I can't drive far without it acting up.  Also, to go down the road would sacrifice about 4 hours commuting daily, when NIH is only 30 miles from me.  Yep, its that bad around here.

OK, so I just forced myself to pick up the phone and ask for Steve at the car dealership!  They connected me to Andy and I explained I had seen the ad in the paper, and were they still hiring?  He said sure and was kinda quiet for a split-second, so I had to steer the conversation some.  I said I would like to come in and find out more about the job, have an interview.  He asked when, I said as soon as TODAY if it was OK? 

3pm, ladies, 3pm is the interview.   I am gonna pick his brain about this industry. 

Funny thing is, with all of these neck problems I've been having....The second accident in Nov 2002 was right in front of the hotel next to this dealership.  I'll be careful!  LOL

Oh goodness!  I had better write down questions.  Andy sounds like he'd just say "Sure, we'll take you" while I want to know more about the industry.......Fingers crossed!

The moon was out all night here, I couldn't sleep.  Clouds moved in around 5am and totally blocked out the moon, so I didn't see any of the eclipse, I was disappointed.  :-X
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Dragonette on August 28, 2007, 01:23:36 pm
Wow, ML, good luck!!! Fingers crossed!!! way to go!!!!

Queen, your situation is so tough. I am really praying and hoping for improvement. I think it's time to pull all possible strings and get some support, b/c what you have to go thru emotionally (bitch sister consequences) is mixing with economic hardship (son of bitch sister consequences). Is there no ASO that can help you, at least handle the harassment? I know you are cool and strong and you will make it, but I hate to think of you going through all that crap. I wish I had some advice, but I can only send support from afar.

Em, I really enjoy reading you. I still keep fingers crossed for the adoption thing. I think you're super-balanced.

Ditto for Betty. I am really starting to have some role models in people I have never met. I am amazed at how I admire all the women on here (the forums), all for different reasons which amount to one and the same, the ability to keep on keepin' on and to keep changing and adapting and adjusting to enormous challenges, and still stay cool.

Hugs to everyone (or rather, group hug...). ps Camille, menaupause according to my poz friend who is going through it now, should hit in about 10 years. There is still time for that.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 28, 2007, 02:49:29 pm
I went back to the gas company with papers in tow. Papers meaning, police report, the actual lease for the place I am in now, not the new place, and had their identity theft paper notarized. I spoke to the same woman I spoke to yesterday but she seemed amazed that I was back. After supplying what she asked for, I said "Now what?" They are going to investigate it she said...Honestly what the fuck is there to investigate, I wanted to scream. My lease should've been proof that I was not living at the other address. She typed something up on her computer, I think she was trying to see when the service was turned on at my nephew's place but she did not tell me when the date was even though the identity theft paper asked which I thought was idiotic. How am I suppose to know when if I am saying it is fraud. I agree with you guys too, I feel the gas company is at fault. All I was told is that I would be contacted when the investigation is complete. At the police station, they are saying give it a week and I should hear from an officer.

I will wait for the eviction notice but really hates that it has to make me look bad in order to get help. I let both the manager of my building and the housing assistance people know this. I'll continue this later, has to run to my ASO and talk with case manager...
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 28, 2007, 09:35:42 pm
Hey Hens!

I have this quick little item to share. Several days ago, I wrote the following to a Poz Personals poster...

I don't want to hurt your feelings and maybe I'm way off base for even writing, but I do know marketing. If you are not getting many responses, you might want to try changing your photo. Most women are not attracted to someone who includes a nearly full nudity photo. Why not put something on that you'd wear when taking someone out to dinner? Don't get the wrong idea, I'm not interested in connecting with you--age, location and interests are not a match. However, I am interested in helping people with blind spots when it comes to marketing themselves. Best of Luck.

And, today, I got a reply from him. It read. " Thank you." I went to his profile, he was smartly dressed in a black shirt and seated in an art-filled setting.  I wrote to tell him his profile looks great, I hope he gets lot of replies, and, that I appreciate his open-mindedness.

I've noticed this upper chest-exposed photo phenomena in a number of the male profiles. Maybe cause they'd like to see some skin they figure we would, too?

Anyhoo, it's been a while since we've had a lite topic---just tossing it in the feed bin. Pecs for the pecking? Braaaaaaaawk, brawk, brawk, brawk.

 
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 28, 2007, 10:05:30 pm
Sorry if I am bringing the mood down with my problems. That was not my intention at all but just needed to vent. I guess I am making things heavy around here so I will refrain from saying anymore about what I am going through. I will do what I do best and keep it to myself. I will not post anything else unless it is of a good nature. But since I am not feeling of a good nature, this will prolly be my last post here for awhile. I will still be around but just not posting. Good Luck to you Ladies.....
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 28, 2007, 10:24:59 pm
Sorry if I am bringing the mood down with my problems. That was not my intention at all but just needed to vent. I guess I am making things heavy around here so I will refrain from saying anymore about what I am going through. I will do what I do best and keep it to myself. I will not post anything else unless it is of a good nature. But since I am not feeling of a good nature, this will prolly be my last post here for awhile. I will still be around but just not posting. Good Luck to you Ladies.....
                                                                                             Queen, please don't shut us out. I haven't meet you in person but I consider you my friend and friends vent with friends and share the ups and downs of life. I know things are rough but keep posting , negative or positive. That's what we are here for. Love.  Cristy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 28, 2007, 10:43:17 pm
GQ: Holy chickens! We've been with you throughout this series of sisters, housing, gasshole events, posted our support, ideas, etc. and because I posted something "lite" you took it personally?  I realize you're in sensitive waters these days, but don't misconstrue something so chatty as being in any way an indirect message. Your post comes off as punishing me for bringing up something different. I don't think that's what you intend, but that is how it reads.

For obvious reasons, I think it would be far better if you continue posting than pull back. Try to put it in perspective. Queen, you of all people, with your wonderful, whacky sense of humor, should be able to understand the benefit of sharing the silly tidbits as well as the terrors.

I hope you rethink your decision as this has never been a thread with any rules about content. Why would that suddenly change today?
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 28, 2007, 11:29:06 pm
GQ: Holy chickens! We've been with you throughout this series of sisters, housing, gasshole events, posted our support, ideas, etc. and because I posted something "lite" you took it personally?  I realize you're in sensitive waters these days, but don't misconstrue something so chatty as being in any way an indirect message. Your post comes off as punishing me for bringing up something different. I don't think that's what you intend, but that is how it reads.

For obvious reasons, I think it would be far better if you continue posting than pull back. Try to put it in perspective. Queen, you of all people, with your wonderful, whacky sense of humor, should be able to understand the benefit of sharing the silly tidbits as well as the terrors.

I hope you rethink your decision as this has never been a thread with any rules about content. Why would that suddenly change today?


No, but you did make me realize Em, is that of late all I have been posting has been whining and complaining. I don't want to be the voice of doom or bad news which is all I have been reporting as of late. I am not punishing you for anything, if that is the way you took it then what do you expect me to say? By all means, say something different, I just won't be posting anything here for awhile because at the moment I am not feeling chatty or has anything nice to say. How I feel right now, no one would want to hear what I have to say and has been known to have the mouth of a sailor if not worse, especially when I am upset. And like the cliche goes, if you don't have anything nice to say then don't say anything at all. I am sure w/ me going into the shadows that this thread will live and go on. With the way things are going for me at this moment, my perspective is a bit slanted to say the least. I don't have any jokes that would make my situation funny or happy.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: sunseeker on August 28, 2007, 11:41:09 pm
Hi Ladies

Moon-  I am dying to know how did your interview go?  I am sure you knocked their socks off. 

Em-   I liked your post about the guys and the picture they post.  I could not have said it better.  Good Job

Talk to you guys soon.

 K
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: emeraldize on August 29, 2007, 08:33:10 am
What is it with this site? Or my connection? I wrote a lengthy response re: GQ, ML, SS and after I hit post, it moved to Bad Gateway and the page of links--- no time to redo.

Summary Version.

GQ. Please post. Sailor mouth or not. Who the fuck here has ever cared how you've said/written anything? You're beloved for NOT filtering and always have been. You're in a serious time. No one expects you to come up with laughs. I know someone in your area, who is highly connected and a long-timer in social services. If we move into PM mode, and you give me a few details, I can seek her input without compromising your identity. If she can't advise as to how to navigate, then no one can.

ML. Our engines are idling as we wait to hear of the dealership trip. I hope it went well.

SS. Thanks much. It was a fun trial balloon. What is up with Cops 1, 2 and Anyone New?

Drag. Going back a bit. Thanks, I wish I were super-balanced. I am working on it. If if I'm allowed to be her mom, I think it will help me to grow up in ways I have yet to do and I look forward to helping her grow up. When I look at her picture, knowing she has no one solely devoted to her, it inspires me. She's a little trooper.

My second interview is Friday a.m.   I'm most hopeful.

Cristy, Betty, Camille, Ann, Blessed, and everyone else--I'm thinking Arby's. No, wait, I'm thinking Hen House 2008. Glad we have a place to be free range.

Em
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 29, 2007, 01:48:11 pm
Hi GFs~

I was posting last night and the lost the entire thing as well!  I almost always copy my post before I "post" it, been burned (barbecued) too many times before.

I wanted to also say that Queen, take a couple of days to lurk and regroup, but certainly DON'T REFRAIN from posting cause of a sailor mouth!  What you have to say about your goings-on helps us.  It helps me personally, as I have thought about SSDI a lot lately and what the consequences of that would be.  You are in the thick of it, living on SSDI, and your experiences and battles prove to be very interesting to me.  It also shows great strength on your part, you know that.   :)

I went to the dealership, and thank goodness doofus Andy didn't interview me.  He was about 28 years old and rude.  I was definitely shining when I went in, better manners than most of the slugs I saw sitting around.  Then again, they were all young men who made a lot of money, for the most part, and the attitude was just so.....awful, and laughable.  It made me feel confident.

Anyway, the general sales manager ended up speaking with me for about 30 minutes.  I had a lot to ask.  I told him that I had never sold cars before, but I hoped that my common sense and customer service from other jobs would be beneficial.  It basically left off with him giving me his card.  He said to think about it and to call him back.  We could have a  second talk if I decided I really wanted to do this. 

What gets me is this.  If selling cars earns so much money, why isn't everyone doing it?  I asked the mgr what the commission rate was and he said 18% for the first 5 cars per month, and then it goes up to 25%.  WHAT?!?!?!?   That is a shitload of money.  If I sold one Toyota Camry a week at $25000, you mean to tell me my commission is $4500 x 4 units for a month?  That sounded too good to be true, so my father is helping me to investigate.  He has friends in the biz, one who owns a dealership, actually.  Also, I found out from Dad that when he and my mother leased her Honda a couple of months ago, they had a FEMALE salesperson.  Dad is going to call her as well.  I may track her down myself and talk to her.  I have to, to hear firsthand how it is.

On a good note, the dealership I interviewed at is newly relocated and expanded, and they are selling 300 - 400 units per month.  Lets just say 300 units.  They have 22 salespeople and can't keep up with the business, which means I am guaranteed to sell cars.  Like Drag posted earlier, I have nothing to lose.  They send you to classroom training for a week, which would be a shitty commute, but its only a week.  Next, you have 10 days orientation/training at the dealership before you can sell.  Worst case, I could try this, get some money in my pockets, and if I burnout, then I leave.  The mgr asked how I felt about the hours etc, and I said I only lived a few miles away so no commute, but I admitted I had never worked a 60-70 hour week.  I imagine there is a lot of downtime, even though he said "they kept you busy"  following up with customers via telephone.  I am so damn efficient, I think I would have down time.  Worst thing is I would get bored.  So what.  To make that kind of income for a few months, trying my hand at a new career, and getting the bills paid?  I can't not try it.

Just thought of something.  I have COBRA through a former employer.  ADAP covers this $300/month premium.  I would have to make sure I could stay with this job before dropping the COBRA benefits, cause then I would have nothing.  I think.  I'll have to check.  Maybe I could keep COBRA while at the dealership.  Shit I don't know, so many questions.

Stone was so cute yesterday.  He sent an email asking me out for Saturday, and said "its not that I can't see you before then, I just thought we could see each other Saturday for sure."  LOL  We still talk every night.  We're doing well.  I just hope he wants to take it to the next level.  We talk as friends and we flirt, but I'm not sure how close (mentally and emotionally) he wants to get.  I think he just needs a little time, given his past.

~Cindy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 29, 2007, 03:39:21 pm
Great news Cin!  Definitely investigate things first, but keep us posted as to what you decide to do! 

Queen, don't stop posting because you think you have nothing nice to say.  You know, what you posts helps other people (meaning me) no matter what it is you say.  It lets me know I'm not the only one who struggles. 

Today is kind of a blue day.  I went and did my father's shopping for him (he's living by himself) and it was weird to be in that house without my mom being there.  Just made me really sad.  Other than that, nothing spectacular.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: msoftie on August 29, 2007, 11:06:53 pm
Hi gals - just lurking tonight - but had to interject a small question/thought:

Prospective Lady Carsalesperson (wink):
  I'm curious to hear about how the auto sales position works out, or not.  I think the commission sounds way high... are you sure that isn't 25% of the car price minus true dealer invoice cost?  That would make more sense.  That would have you trying to sell cars at Retail pricing vs. reducing the price, thus your commission...  Let us know what you find out.  I always wanted to know more about the dealings of those salespeople!  It'll make me a more savvy consumer on my next car shopping 'experience'.  I've bought a lot of cars in my past - and it's such a dreadful thing to go through... "I'll go ask my Sales Mgr. to see if I can get you a better deal" - What a bunch of BS to go through, you know?

BTW - I did buy my last car from a woman, INTENTIONALLY. :)

Sorry I don't have more comments tonight - I'm wiped - dizziness is my new 'friend' tonight - totally sober too!
Ciao for now!


Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 29, 2007, 11:37:56 pm
Well ladies......You asked for it even though I am a bit calmer today even though the situation is moving at a snail's pace. I appreciate that you all still want me to post even though I am feeling like a royal bitch.... ;D Hey, I made a funny...Like Ralph Malph from Happy Days use to say, "I still got it"...Not sure if you ladies overseas gets Happy Days....So here's the update....

If you remember when I went to the gas company on Monday, they gave me a letter of denial for service at the new place due to a previous gas bill at an address I never lived at. But I knew who lived there, my nephew. Anyhoo, they gave me an Identity Theft paper to fill out and get notarized as well as file a police report. I did all that and turned it in Tuesday plus showing them the lease from where I am now which I have been for almost 2 years. The lady's response, we will investigate it and get back with you. That just didn't sit well with me because even with me providing the proof I did, she still treated me like I was the one committing fraud.

Of course, I woke up calling the PUC which stands for the Public Utilities Commission. I explained to them the situation and I got the same response as the gas company, We'll investigate it and get back with you. While at my future room mate's residence, we were talking about the situation and they suggested I call the electric company to find out if the same was done with them which it wasn't but once I explained the situation to the woman at the electric company, she gave me the number to the Federal Trade Commission and told me to tell them what was going on and they would investigate it too. My roomie also suggested that I call my case worker at the Assistance Office. I called about 30 minutes before he was due to leave and was expecting a call back the following day but was surprised when he called back 15 minutes before he was due to clock out which is rare. I told him what was going on and he looked up the LIHEAP application under my social. Come to find out I hadn't filled out an application since 2003 but for the address of where my nephew lived, applications were forged in my name for 2005 and 2006. He said he would have to make his supervisor aware of the situation but told me I would have to come down to the office and sign paperwork declaring that it was not me. I was beyond pissed and more to the tune of livid. The minute I open my eyes tomorrow I will be on the phone with the Federal Trade Commission. Hopefully they can make the gas company get off their asses and once they figure out their mistake, I would like a written apology. I don't think that is too much to ask. But I also want my nephew charged with fraud and get locked up for it. Since it is federal fraud committed, I want him to get locked up. I think my sister is the one who signed my name to the application because she lied and said she saw the application and she knows my handwriting but according to the gas company the only way I could see the actual application is to have a subpeona, I prolly spelled that wrong but you know what I mean.

I am still waiting to hear back from my case manager over at my ASO because she is trying to get some funding to pay part of my security deposit and part of the 1st months rent. I have the money for this already and told her this but says if I qualify that I will still be given the money. That money will be going towards October's rent which is a blessing in itself because October is my son's Bday and he wants Madden 08 which is a football game that is running 50 bucks plus I would like to get him something else.

I really appreciate that you ladies can appreciate my rather blunt if sometimes ghetto way of saying things or saying things the average person wouldn't say. But you all are right, you have been here with me from the beginning and it wouldn't be fair to push you guys away now. I usually push because I have a temper when upset and I can be mean at times. So instead of being mean to any of you, I would rather have walked away and not say anything. You all are the sisters I should've had and I consider you sisters from another mother. Not sure if you are familiar with the saying or not. I will keep you updated...
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: sunseeker on August 29, 2007, 11:58:45 pm
Hi GF's

Moon- I am glad to hear the your interview went well and you are looking into things before jumping in, but then on the other hand what do you have to loose.

EM- Well things are getting interesting with the man front, when it rains it pours.  Cop #1 called me today and we are suppose to talk tonight.  I had to distance my self from him because the emotions were just to strong.  I plan to be very open with him and let him know where I am coming from.  So lets see if he calls tonight.  He said that he was going to a BBQ tonight with some of the guys and would call me later.  I told him I did not care how late it was but really wanted to talk with him and if he did not call me I would be mad.  He said no worries he would for sure call me.

Cop #2 Called me yesterday and wanted to know if he could call me after he put the kids to bed.  I said yes, but he never did call me.  My guess is it got to late and he did not want to wake me since he knew that I had to work at 7am.  I talked to my friend who is friends with him and neither one of them know that I + and she said that he hopes that when I do go to see him he wants to take the time to get to know someone before being intimate.  I could not agree more because now I can also take the time to get to know him and can enjoy our time without have to worry about telling him my status.  I have always been one to jump into relationships for the fear of being alone and hence how I got in my position.  After my last relationship ended a month ago with someone who was + I decided to put me first and take my time with the next relationship in hopes that if the person was negative they would get to know me and when I did tell them it would not be a big deal.  

Now for new business.  I have been talking to this guy who from his pictures seems like a cutie.  We have been emailing every day and sending long emails back and forth.  He claims to be very open minded on just about everything and is willing to take one day at a time.  We have not met due to our schedules but are hoping to meet soon.  I told him that I am not ready to jump into a relationship and he said that he is very patient and is willing to take our friendship or relationship at whatever speed I wanted.  So we will see how things go after we meet.  Due to his vacations and mine we will no be able to meet for a few weeks.  

My ex-boyfriend called me today as well.  I was with him when I found out that I was +.  He was very supportive but he was not grown up and responsible in many ways and that is why we broke up.  We have remained friends and can never forget the support that he has given me since I found out that I was +.  He told me that he really misses me and wants chat with me tonight.  So I am not sure what that is about.  

So tonight I may be juggling 3 phone calls, I hope not all at once I will keep you posted.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 30, 2007, 01:18:09 am
Hi GFs~

I'm scared about this job thing, something is telling me that a 60-70 hour week is too much.  I'm sitting on the car thing for awhile in order to digest it some.

I got an email through positivesingles.com tonight from someone in my town.  The email started out, "Hi Cindy, I met you a few weeks ago when we went to see that band....."  I am wondering WHO in the hell did I meet that is ALSO on positivesingles.com?  I am hoping its the tall brother, Jeff, but I finish the email and its signed by a female.  This girl that was hanging out with my childhood friend that night just found out that she has herpes.  She wanted to meet people in the area and she saw my pic, hence she knows about my HIV.  She lives less than a mile from my house, is my age and has kids.

I called her tonight and we both started crying on the phone.  We ended up talking for two hours and we are going to get together this weekend.  I am happy to have a GF nearby.  Everyone is either busy or far away, but this girl is reaching out and I think its really cool.  I told her herpes isn't the end of the world, that a lot of people have it and it can be lived with.  So, I have a new buddy and I am excited!  The band we like is going to be in town on 9/8 so maybe she and I can go slam in the pit together!

I am going to see Stone on Thursday and Friday cause his bitch ex-wife switched plans on him.  She goes out of town a lot and if its when she has their son, she'll leave him with another family.  Stone doesn't like that, so he ends up taking him.  Its not going to be any easier, his ex is very materialistic and only cares about labels and the people she's seen with, the places she goes.  She needs to be hit by a bus.

Em~  Sorry to jump the gun the other day with the NIH link.  I looked more closely today and saw it said Frederick on it, so I looked into some things, and applied to a job in my town.  I wanted to say THANK YOU for your help with that.  We'll see where it goes!

Edited to add:  Got a flirt in poz personals from "toyota02" in NJ, must be my theme of late, with the dealership and all!   :D

~Cindy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: BT65 on August 30, 2007, 07:29:41 am
Queen-
  I am glad you decided against the idea to stop posting.  You really do help me realize that I'm not the only one with any problems.  And I know you're a strong woman and can handle things as they come up.  I also hope your ASO gets the paperwork and approval done for the financial help.  I hope your nephew gets held responsible also, and your sister too for that matter.  What they did was so wrong. 
  Cin- It must feel really great to have a GF close by who shares a few similar health concerns with you.  I have a best friend who has Hep C.  I used to have a best friend with AIDS, but she died years ago.  I really miss her.

Tonight starts a new class for me.  "Introduction to Philosophy."  I've heard that I'm going to like it.  So we'll see.  I might see that girl again today, the one I posted about way back.  She wants me to come over and see "The Fog."  Queen, did you ever see that movie and what did you think of it?  Apparently this girl is somewhat of a horror movie buff, and she said it's an excellent movie.  Saturday is my granddaughter's 7th birthday.  I still haven't gotten her anything, as I'm not really sure what it is 7-year olds like nowadays.  Maybe a gift card to Wal-Mart, even though I really don't like that "institution."  I hope you all have a good day.
Peace-
Betty
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: cjc on August 30, 2007, 07:52:52 am
Hello ladies.   queen , glad you posted. I feel the same way. You are my sisters from other mothers and I love ya'll.  Sorry you are having to deal with all that shit. That's really messed up but you know family will screw you quicker than anyone else.                                   ML, glad you made a friend close by. The car dealership thing sounds good. Hope it works out for you.                                  SS , you go girl.  Hope one of those fellas work out for you.                                        Betty , it's really great that you help your dad like that. Makes it kinda hard that she's not there but at least he has you to help.                         I am not having much luck in the dating department, I QUIT again, for a couple days at least.    My baby started School for real today. I am crushed. He is in Pre-K but at his same school he will be attending for the next 5 years. I am worried about him, normal I know, he is so sweet and innocent. I'm having a hard time letting go. I want to protect him from the cruel world and can't.  Today I have my final checkup from my hysterectomy so my mom will get him off the bus. I still have internal stitches and they should have dissolved by now. I will make sure I tell her about it. Other than that, I have healed quite well. Now I am in heat and can't do anything about it. Oh well.           Em. drag, all the rest of you ladies, hope you have a good day.   Love ya'll.   Cristy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Dragonette on August 30, 2007, 11:19:49 am
Hello ladies,

Queen, pls feel free to keep sharing and don't mind the sailor mouth, I have heard worse! Or the ghetto vibe... you're our ghetto superstar! I just feel bad that I can't consult. I mean I have experience but it does not relate to the US, every countrts different. Looks like you are doing what you should be doing - contacting whoever needs to be and getting things in motion. You will have identity theft to add to your sister's list of "achievements" and if anyone wonders why she's going around saying you are poz you can add that in to make her look slightly more unreliable...

But seriosuly it is a very tough one and no laughing matter.

Here it is very rainy and cold, I can count the number of sunny days this year on one hand, and this is also a result of global warming - all the rain is pushed to this side of the world. Mi Hombre is in another country for a few days, so I have time to sit alone and comtemplate... this combines with work, which I have really, really let go of in the past months. It was bound to happen sometime. I am just chilling, I can't be stressed anymore, the last 1.5 years, especially the first year, was an incredible rollercoaster of stress. It's like a part of me rebels against it.

The I read about other people and feel connected.

ps yes ML, 60-70 hours is an awful lot. I had no idea people have to work like that. Here, that would be illegal. But it also depends what they ential, but it looks like these guys just eat, work and sleep, when do they live? You did a supercool thing though by going to find out about it. Now you have do decide... and is there no options of working lesser hours. if even for a lower pay?
 
Until the next time, good luck everyone and good vibrations.
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on August 30, 2007, 12:40:49 pm
Hi GFs~

I couldn't sleep last night!  Ugh!  I didn't want to take a Benadryl cause it knocked me out Tuesday all the way through yesterday afternoon.  I'm still experimenting.  I have been very good to my neck and have been on the treadmill, too.  I go to the massage therapist today for 30 minutes.

Betty~  I have a niece who will be 7 on 9/9.  The latest rage is anything to do with the movie "High School Musical."  My mom says its kinda like how the Mickey Mouse Club used to be for us.  Mom is getting my niece a High School Musical alarm clock, cause that's what she asked for, lol!  Cute at age 7!  Glad to hear you're meeting with Salad Girl again, as I fondly remember her, lol!  Let us know how it goes, and don't worry too much about high-maintenance, its better than no maintenance at all, right?  ;)

Cristy~  The little one is going to pre-K.  I remember my mom couldn't wait to get me out of the house.  At age 2,  I was already a hellion and too big for my britches, so to speak, lol!  What I wouldn't give to be 2 again and not know a damn thing about anything, even for a day.  I don't think you work every day, right?  So, you'll have time to get a few things done around the house and run errands while your little one is in school.  It'll be a little "break" for you, so that you can keep your sanity, and he'll be back before you know it.  Its a good balance for both of you.  I didn't know you had a hysterectomy, sorry that I missed that.  I think I had read about surgery and being "in heat"  (lol) before, but thought you had something minor done.  I am too scared to even have a D&C and I am avoiding it at all costs.  That shit scares me, being diabetic and all.

Dragonette~  What I wouldn't give for cold weather and rain.  It has been hot and extremely dry here on the east coast this summer.  Only good thing is that the grass hasn't grown much.  I don't think I've mowed the front yard in close to a month, although I'll be doing that tomorrow, most likely.  As far as jobs here, an average job is a 40-hour week, but in sales, like with cars, its long days.  I don't know, the money and the idea that I probably could sell cars had me all excited.  I just keep thinking I know better and really just want a simple job where I can have a normal routine.  If I can live off of unemployment which is $1600 a month (although barely "live") then I should be OK with a low-paying job.  Its just the idea of never getting ahead in this world with my pay topping out that pisses me off.  Now I just have to worry about a great resume that makes people think I am overqualified, so no one is biting.  I'll check the paper tomorrow and see what comes up.  Sigh, I know I'll just get pissed with low pay, but I have to do something.

Going to take Cheech for a ride to the gas station, need gas for the lawnmower and the Jeep.  Then I'll have a lazy afternoon getting ready for my massage, and then off to see Stone and the diabetic doggie tonight.  Still bleeding from my messed up cycle, its about day 12 now.  Only a trace amount, but still, its there.  Wish this shit would end.  This Sunday would be the day to start a new pack of pills, but its not going to happen as I agreed to stop.  I hope the cramps aren't too bad next month and that the fibroids shrink as well.  I think they already have since May, doing OK.....

Camille and Nicole~  Hardly ever see you guys, I hope you're OK. 
Ubotts~  You too, with the skin condition I read about in another post, are you alright? 
SS~  Be careful with Cop#1, he should be off-limits until he gets his head screwed on straight.  Is he even separated yet?
Queen~  Glad you were awake at 4am last night to chat a bit.  Glad to hear you had the Boo connection going on!  Give the FTC hell today, GF!
Em~  Tell us more about your daughter, where is she from, when will you meet?  I read about that briefly in another post and thought that it was amazing, what you're doing.  You have such a big heart.

OK, gotta get the cluck outta here!  Queen, if you think of something catchy, start that Dating Part V thread.  Its your go, lol!

~Cindy
Title: Re: Dating Part IV: The Grooviest Hen Party Going
Post by: Queen Tokelove on August 30, 2007, 01:25:27 pm
Thanks Ladies for your kind words. They are appreciated. I figured I would peck a moment here before I get on the phone again and try to bitch at someone again. I did file a complaint with the FTC online but am going to call them today too. I am not backing down, I want justice, family or no family. I was hurt that my nephew would do this to me considering that he use to live with me in the past but I know his mother put him up to it. But he will have to pay for her actions.

Someone asked me about the Fog movie, I am assuming that you are talking about the newer version. It was ok but kinda lame to me. You know I like to see blood and guts in my horror movie. If I had to rate it, I would give it a 5 but preferred the original even though it would seem kinda cheesy now.

Powder-- Sorry you are having a tough time sleeping, I hope that clears up for you too. And you are going on day 12 with Aunt Flo, I don't miss her at all. Gotta love the depo shot. I am sorry to hear that Stone's doggy has diabetes, poor thing.

I will come up with a snazzy title for the part V of this thread a little later. I couldn't wait and am on the phone with the gas company again. I have a series of calls to make and I will update you on all that later. But this weekend is the move. I will be moving the smaller stuff out tomorrow and my cousin will be coming with his truck either Saturday or Sunday night. Til later ladies........

Modified to add: I made the few calls to my case worker, the gas company and the FTC. Now the security dept of the gas company got the paperwork they asked for. I have to wait on them to call me to go over some affadavit, not sure what that is unless they are talking about the identity theft form. I still don't see any progress there. My case worker did get in contact with the LIHEAP supervisor but that person is waiting to hear back from someone in Harrisburg. I guess this is a first for them there so I have to wait on them also. I really hate this waiting game. Maybe if I get a letter from my doctor stating my health issues they will try to move a bit faster. Good thing I called the FTC because they couldn't seem to find the online application I had done. But they are going to send me some info through email to put a fraud alert out w/ the credit reporting companies.
And just got off the phone with my ASO, they will pay part of my 1st month's rent and security deposit and I also qualify for the monthly rental assistance program when my time comes...Wooooo Hoooooo. Things are looking a tad bit brighter.... ;D