A little concern...

[idee]

I have understood from the moment my older half sister became a model that beauty is seen first, among all else. I am the plane jane.
Now she looks like a bear malled her and is bitter for her appearance.
I know I am not perfect. Yet it does feel good to see my past tormentor in her condition. She even lied about her job as an orderly claiming to be a CNA. Telling me how I needed to stay home to sweep my kitchen floor. In other words I shouldn't look past being a home maker.
I now have six texts even though I have only three courses, but this fall is my last semester.
What I am nervous about is my appearance. I am thirty-seven. I have been searching for clothes online. I already have contacted a hair stylist and she also does makeup.
I am not a girly girl. I was a tom boy growing up who hung around my older brother. I liked being outside.
My mom was always upset I did not take dance lessons or my appearance seriously. My dad could care less. He took me to the store covered in dirt from the back yard. I learned values from the men in my family.
I guess my question is does anyone have suggestions on clothing? I will be looking for work in a medical office.
I have looked online and I either get too young or frumpy.
I am not sure if I can change my appearance. Though
I can do the course work no problem.
I just don't want to be stuck cleaning, cooking, and being frumpy. That has been the last ten years. My husband said he will take over cleaning and cooking. He uses testosterone. He gets sick where he starts coughing up foam every couple months.
So I am going to work. I don't want this change. Yet I will not be happy unless I succeed.

[BT65]

What do you mean you "don't want this change?"  You don't want to work? 

As far as clothing goes, I do not know what type of job you will be looking for.  If it is like a receptionist, or medical records, get some dress pants, and nice shirts to match.  I personally have purchased several outfits from Goodwill over the years. 

If it is like a medical assistant that will work directly with patients, the doctor's office may mandate scrubs be worn. 

I feel that you have a lot of underlying familial issues.  It seems in threads you start, you are always mentioning negative information about your family, so there must be something unresolved there.  But I believe I read in an earlier thread that you do see a therapist?

If you do not want to work you shouldn't.  Because itwill make working miserable for you, and that will effect your job.  Just stay on disability until something comes along that will make you feel fulfilled, happy. 

Betty