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Author Topic: A Void Never Filled  (Read 4072 times)

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Offline Joe K

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  • 31 Years Poz
A Void Never Filled
« on: June 10, 2010, 10:56:00 pm »
I have been reading the posts regarding various issues surrounding HIV, whether it be criminal prosecution for transmission, bug chasing or the morality/responsibility of disclosure. There are so many issues that we, as pozzies face, but I believe that many of these issues are exacerbated by the loss of so many gay men, during the 80s and early 90s. Even using the most conservative estimates of mortality, say 40,000 deaths per year, over 15 years that totals over 600,000 gay men, who simply ceased to exist.

A huge swath of the gay population, who would now be in their 50s to 70s are simply gone and with them, who knows how many hopes and dreams. Those men were not here to serve as role models or mentors, nor to enter professions that have profound effects on with world, in which we live. Thousands upon thousands of gay men, simply gone, with no one to replace them.

Where might we be today, in so many areas, if those lost voices had not been silenced? Imagine how different, HIV prevention and Sex Education may be today, if there had been those lost voices to temper the dogma that stressed religious beliefs above scientific truth. I like to think that thousands of them, would have had measurable impacts on everything from gay culture to how we fund and provide HIV services. How different might our culture be today, if AIDS had not cut such a wide and brutal path, through our brothers?

I miss having peers my own age, I miss my friends and loved ones.

So many voices silenced. Leaving a void that was never filled...

Offline edfu

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  • Posts: 1,090
Re: A Void Never Filled
« Reply #1 on: June 11, 2010, 04:19:19 am »
Amen.

As someone who's 67 and lived in NYC from 1963, I know full well how true and how sad your observations are.  My entire social and peer group was literally wiped out, and the generation after that was pretty much decimated as well.  Two generations.   R.I.P.
"No one will ever be free so long as there are pestilences."--Albert Camus, "The Plague"

"Mankind can never be free until the last brick in the last church falls on the head of the last priest."--Voltaire

Offline leatherman

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Re: A Void Never Filled
« Reply #2 on: June 11, 2010, 10:27:35 am »
I miss having peers my own age, I miss my friends and loved ones.
it does make for a lonely life  :'(
leatherman (aka Michael)

We were standing all alone
You were leaning in to speak to me
Acting like a mover shaker
Dancing to Madonna then you kissed me
And I think about it all the time
- Darren Hayes, "Chained to You"

Offline emeraldize

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Re: A Void Never Filled
« Reply #3 on: June 11, 2010, 12:39:34 pm »
Even using the most conservative estimates of mortality, say 40,000 deaths per year, over 15 years that totals over 600,000 gay men, who simply ceased to exist.

A huge swath of the gay population, who would now be in their 50s to 70s are simply gone and with them, who knows how many hopes and dreams. Those men were not here to serve as role models or mentors, nor to enter professions that have profound effects on with world, in which we live. Thousands upon thousands of gay men, simply gone, with no one to replace them.

Where might we be today, in so many areas, if those lost voices had not been silenced?

Killfoile: You got me thinking about this. It's so sad and disturbing to think about such a large loss. I began to wonder if it could give way to a great premise for a book and/or movie, maybe with the goal of being educational.

We age photos to show what 10 years does to a kidnapped child or add weight or change hair color. We like forecasting and predicting and what iffing. But your wondering is so large...600,000 men gone. What would have happened had they lived?

What if half a dozen gay men, who really existed, were re-enlivened, their stories summarized to the point of death by HIV (as compiled by research with family, friends, colleagues) and then, their unwalked paths imagined (by good writers) and portrayed (by great actors)?  Three known or famous people and three not famous. Maybe six would be too many. But, this would be one man per 100,000 per your estimate.

Em

if this has been done, please tell me, and I'll just confirm, yes I live under half of a large rock most days

Offline Moffie65

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  • Posts: 1,755
  • Living POZ since 1983
Re: A Void Never Filled
« Reply #4 on: June 11, 2010, 12:51:32 pm »
Joe,

Thanks for this thread, I guess.  Sometimes when I think back, it makes me sad, and then other times it makes me happy.  When HIV is thrown into the mix, it is almost always thoughts of devastation.  I remember visiting friends living in their cars, under the freeway with thier pets, simply because landlords had the ability to still evict, due to HIV.  The utter hopelessness, and sorrow was too much for any of us "normal" humans to witness, but we did, and we somehow survived that desperate time. 

I have burried about 210 people to this disease currently, and it never gets any easier to say goodbye, so now I just say I'll see you soon enough.  There is certainly a void, and there is little to fill that void anymore.

Em, No, to my knowledge this type of film has never been made, but for sure, it would be awakening if done well and with the right amount of truth about the past.  Truth after all is the only thing that makes for a quality product anymore. 
The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals,
and 362 to heterosexuals.
This doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals,
It's just that they need more supervision.
Lynn Lavne

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: A Void Never Filled
« Reply #5 on: June 11, 2010, 04:07:46 pm »
From time to time and not infrequently I think of all of the abilities and talents lost to the world through this epidemic. I have the same thoughts about the Holocaust -- all those possibilities gone, gone, gone.

It's repetitious and almost a cliche to say this, but anyone who didn't live through those years in the 1980s and early 90s just can't imagine what it was like. There was the constant shock of the losses, the coping with illness, the wondering about who and how many would be next, the seemingly unstoppable quality of it all. And of course amidst the horror the prejudice which made it all worse and in some situations meant the difference between life and death.     

To quote Thomas Wolfe, "Oh, lost."
Andy Velez

 


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