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Author Topic: Really scared...  (Read 10181 times)

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Offline Penny

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Really scared...
« on: August 24, 2007, 07:37:01 am »
Hello,

I really love and admire your help here for all of us!!!
I am very confused....please,i would like your opinion for my activities.

I am female and was with someone,what we did :

Fingering and mutual masturbation...what if he had precum on his hand??
Frottage for a few seconds...?
If some of the semen touch only the outside of the rectum is this risky??

And then he put a condom on...But from the position that i was i couldnt see what he was doing...and a few minutes later he finished and his semen was low on my back and maybe some outside of the rectum...then i panicked and asked him if he took the condom off during the sexual act,he said no and then he show me the condom that was ok,not broken and actually had a little precum inside....

I am really worry over this...dont know what to believe..is it possible something like that??
Please give me your thoughts
Thank you very much!


Offline RapidRod

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Re: Really scared...
« Reply #1 on: August 24, 2007, 09:38:18 am »
You were never at risk. Please take time to read the lesson on transmission. You can find the link in the "Welcome" thread.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Really scared...
« Reply #2 on: August 24, 2007, 12:00:44 pm »
Fortunately you weren't at risk this time, as Rod has told you.

But this epidemic is going to be around for a longtime to come so it's important that you become better informed about HIV. That way you can enjoy yourself sexually and not worry unnecessarily as you have been. There are some simple guidelines. If you follow them consistently you'll be ok as far as HIV is concerned. The main thing is that anytime you have intercourse your partner always has to be wearing a latex condom. No exceptions no matter what you think you know about his history or how great he looks or anything. A condom is a must.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline Penny

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Re: Really scared...
« Reply #3 on: August 25, 2007, 08:35:04 pm »
Thank you very much for the reply....but i am still concered.
Is there any risk if the semen touch the rectum from the outside??
And i dont really know if i believe him about not taking off the condom because he didnt want to use a condom from the begining and i was the one that insist...i did what i think it was right but i am not sure...

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Really scared...
« Reply #4 on: August 25, 2007, 09:52:59 pm »
No Penny, there is no risk from just getting a dab of semen on you anus. The anus is the outer entry which leads to the rectum. A subtle but important distinction.

Now I agree completely with everything Andy and Rod have told you, but since you now report doubts about whether this chap kept the condom on or not, you might want to have a full STD screen performed.

All sexually active people should have a full STD screen performed at least once a year. Twice is better. A full screen will include but is not limited to an HIV antibody test. Please contact your doctor or local clinic to arrange one, should you feel it necessary.

Please note that I fully expect you to test negative.

MtD

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Really scared...
« Reply #5 on: August 26, 2007, 05:46:46 am »
Penny,

The ONLY time you MAY have been at risk for hiv during your encounter is IF he removed the condom during intercourse. If you have serious doubts about this, the only thing for it is to have a full sexual health check up.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence. You might also be interested in checking out the information on the female condom and other female controled methods of hiv prevention. And don't be afraid to carry condoms with you. Far from saying to the world that you're easy, it says to the world that you care about both yourself and others.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Penny

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Re: Really scared...
« Reply #6 on: August 26, 2007, 10:20:02 am »
Your answers are very helpful!

I have an other question,for the other std how long should i wait before i go to the doctor?
Ι have heard that hpv has a period of 6 months...is it true??

Αnd something else,i saw a little wetness on the sheets propably from his semen,what if i sat there,is there any risk from that??

Τhank you a lot for your time..really,you are good!
kisses for all of you!

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Really scared...
« Reply #7 on: August 26, 2007, 10:41:47 am »
You were never at risk. You won't get infected even if you sit in semen.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Really scared...
« Reply #8 on: August 26, 2007, 12:48:13 pm »
Penny,

For information on other STIs, try The Drama Down Under, an Australian site. While it's geared toward gay men, the basic information is the same no matter who you are or where you live.

If you're worried about HPV, that's what PAP smears are all about. Make sure you're getting one done regularly.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Penny

  • Member
  • Posts: 11
Re: Really scared...
« Reply #9 on: September 14, 2007, 09:35:03 am »
Hello,

I am here again because i keep thinking the possibility of his semen touching my vagina from the outside when he ejaculated.
I am not sure if any of his fluids went there because i couldnt see.But If thats true is there any risk from that?

I would be very grateful if you could answer,

Thank you.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Really scared...
« Reply #10 on: September 14, 2007, 09:45:43 am »
Penny,

What you describe is a situation that would also occur during frottage (rubbing the genital together WITHOUT penetration), and frottage is not a risk for hiv infection.

Hiv is very fragile and difficult to transmit. Successful transmission happens INSIDE the body. Make sure condoms are being used. (see my posts above)

What you describe is not a risk.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Penny

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  • Posts: 11
Re: Really scared...
« Reply #11 on: September 14, 2007, 09:57:57 am »
Ann,

Thanks for the reply,but i am talking about his ejaculation and maybe some of his semen touched my vagina from the outside,not during frottage.
Is it not risky something like that? maybe some got inside,or from the mucous membrane at the outside of the vagina..?

Thanks again.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Really scared...
« Reply #12 on: September 14, 2007, 10:24:41 am »
Penny,

When frottage occurs, all sorts of bodily fluids are rubbed together between you and your partner's outer sexual organs - including the inner lips of your vaginal area. Getting a few drops of semen on this outer area is not going to result in hiv infection.

Ann
 
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Penny

  • Member
  • Posts: 11
Re: Really scared...
« Reply #13 on: September 19, 2007, 07:15:03 am »
Hello,

I am very sad,recently i was talking with some guys,one of those was a gynecologist and we had a conversation about STD and hiv.
He told us that if someone only put a condom and then finished without doing anything else then he is not in risk for anything...but if he touch the other person and they had fngering,oral sex,frottage e.t with the exchange of their fluids, then he is for sure in risk for all the STD include hiv,but hiv is not so easy to transmit also Νot impossible!!
I freaked out...so what...we cant do anything naturally because of the fear of infection..?
Is it true,that you have to be so careful even when touching the other?I wouldnt believe something like that but he was a doctor..

Thank you and sorry for my English.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Really scared...
« Reply #14 on: September 19, 2007, 07:20:25 am »
Penny,

Just because someone is a doctor does NOT mean they are up to date on hiv transmission.

Outside of unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse, there are very few risks. There have been long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one.

If the activities you talk about were real risks, we would have seen some of the people who were using condoms in these studies become infected. They didn't.

If you can't bring yourself to believe us that you had no risk, go test and collect your negative result.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
 
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Penny

  • Member
  • Posts: 11
Re: Really scared...
« Reply #15 on: September 27, 2007, 01:43:28 pm »
Hello,

Sorry for posting again,but i am really confused now.I tested for other STD (not hiv) they were all negative except NGU which was positive.
How is this possible?if i can become infected with a std from this act am i also in risk for hiv...??
I read that NGU transmission is  a result from the exchange of fluids...i am really worried now,maybe from fingering with precum or frottage.
Please i know that you will tell me that when the hiv virus is outside become unable to infect.But how long after?Ιf those acts happened right away,i mean within seconds isnt a risk??
Please give me your thoughts.

Τhank you very much!

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Really scared...
« Reply #16 on: September 27, 2007, 01:55:42 pm »
Penny,

ALL the other STIs are MUCH more easily transmitted than hiv. It's possible you got the NGU as a result of fingering. It is also possible you got it as a result of injury or trauma to the area which caused inflammation.

Condoms prevent hiv infection. It really is that simple.

As we've told you before, if you cannot bring yourself to believe us, then test, collect your negative result and move on.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Really scared...
« Reply #17 on: September 27, 2007, 01:58:28 pm »
Yes, some STDs can be transmitted by skin-to-skin contact. But NOT HIV. So it's possible to have contracted something but it doesn't change the science-based reality as far as HIV is concerned. Your anxiety seems to be causing you to mix unrelated things together.

As Ann suggested, maybe the only thing that will convince you is to take an HIV test and collect the inevitable negative result.
Andy Velez

Offline Penny

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  • Posts: 11
please clarify
« Reply #18 on: October 30, 2007, 04:26:06 pm »
Hello,
sorry for posting again and spending your time with this but i feel sad and depressed...
I would like if it is possible to explain to me some things.

i did some web searching and i keep reading that the hiv virus become inactivated when it has dried and that will also depent from the bodily fluid,viral load,humidity e.t.

So from the frottage i have described,my inner lips of the vagina(which are made from mucous membrane) came in direct contact with the penis so with his precum...there was direct genital contact with his fluids/precum being wet. :(

Ann,Andy how there is no risk from that?you say so because that doesnt happen often or you have never see something like that?please i would be grateful if you could explain.

Ι know the only way for me to calm down is to get tested but right now i am really scared that i have put myself in risk and that makes me really sad.

Thank you very very much...

Offline Penny

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Please clarify
« Reply #19 on: October 31, 2007, 08:19:47 am »
Somebody please?

Thanks and sorry for any inconvenience.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Really scared...
« Reply #20 on: October 31, 2007, 09:52:00 am »
Penny,

Hiv can only latch onto and infect certain types of cells. These types of cells are not present in the outer vaginal area. They are, however, found on your cervix, which is deep inside the vagina and would not have been exposed to any penile fluids during frottage. Frottage is not a risk for hiv infection for either party.

Penny, if we thought you had a risk, we'd be shouting it from the rooftops and insisting you test. You didn't have a risk and you only need to test for your own peace of mind. As long as you've never had unprotected intercourse, you can fully expect a negative result.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Penny

  • Member
  • Posts: 11
Re: Really scared...
« Reply #21 on: January 30, 2008, 05:20:27 pm »
Hello all!
Recently i went to a new gynecologist for examination.I freaked out because he used a metal speculum to open my vagina..i am used to plastic speculums that are for single use.
I am not very well about this and i am thinking the worst..please help me
I asked him if the instruments that he used are sterile and he told me yes.
Please, i think that the speculum he used wasnt clean from the previous patient

I know that you will tell me that this is impossible and i am crazy,

but is it possible for me to be infected if he used the same speculum without sterile it within 5 or 6 minutes from the previous patient ?
will the hiv virus be inactive within 5 minutes??tell me your thoughts i am very nervous...

Thank you very much

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Really scared...
« Reply #22 on: January 30, 2008, 05:31:29 pm »
Penny,

I seriously urge you to seek some psychiatric help. We're simply not able to provide you with the assistance you so obviously require.

Metal pedersens (speculums) are in no way a risk for transmitting HIV. There is no way your doctor would have used a contaminated speculum when examining you.

MtD

Offline Penny

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Re: Really scared...
« Reply #23 on: January 30, 2008, 05:40:22 pm »
well thanks for your reply but you didnt answer my question..
Even if you think that there is no way that he used the same speculum,can you please tell me with the possibility that he did... is there any risk from this?
will be inactive within 5 minutes''?

Thanks

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Really scared...
« Reply #24 on: January 30, 2008, 05:44:40 pm »
Penny,

Even if he did use a previously used speculum, there is no way in hell you would have become infected with hiv from it. Is that clear enough? Keep posting about this and you'll be given a time out.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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