POZ Community Forums
HIV Prevention and Testing => Do I Have HIV? => Topic started by: INeedBiggerGuns on March 25, 2007, 03:55:00 am
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Tested positive on 3-22-07.
Age:20
Decided to finally muster up the courage in order to go get tested.
Had unusual amount of sinus infections, and upper respiratory infections.
Had a few unprotected sex partners, don't really know currently where
I'm at with CD4 / VL levels. I took an "Oraquick" test that showed a
very faint T line which showed up as reactive to HIV antibodies. Im waiting
for confirmation of western blot, which should be due back 3/30.
I'm not really holding on to the idea that it was a false positive,because
they are suppose to be 99.6% accurate.
I haven't cried yet, wondering when that is going to come along.
Only my girlfriend my grandmother and the AIDS counselor knows Im positive.
I was afraid my girlfriend would leave me, but she said she doesn't want anything
to change, and that she still loves me, (what a great gal).
Hoping to find some support, and make some friends.
Much Love To All.
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Thanks for opening up to us. Saddened to hear you tested positive but it sounds like you have a great girlfriend and a growing support network with an HIV counselor etc. Good going there, he/she sounds like a great resource. Now it's time to monitor your viral load and CD4 counts on a periodic basis with a qualified health care professional. We're here for you. The members here are so diverse. Some have lived with HIV since the early 1980's! :o Some have tested poz only recently, like this year, last year, etc. I tested poz in 2000 and I'm doing well on meds. Ask us anything. Anything! AIDSmeds is a site with so much helpful information and we're gonna help you find what you need. Be strong 8)
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Hey.
Welcome. I'm sorry you're here for the reason you are, but glad you found this site - it's an awesome resource. Or rather the people here are.
I'm 14 months in now, and it does get easier. It's different from everybody - I certainly took a long time to cry too. I guess if I was giving advice to me 14 months ago I would just tell myself that a) it gets easier, b) nothing changes all that fast and c) don't fuck anything important in your life up whilst you're dealing with this. Tell that to my credit card provider.
Hope you post more and let us know how you're getting on.
Matt.
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In order to make myself feel better, I sort of look at HIV like its the Epstein-Barr virus.
#1 It'll always be with me
#2 It sucked when I found out I first had it
#3 It sucked as much energy (as I let it) out of me.
#4 Its manageable.
#5 I got it from somebody.
(my opinion anyway)
I feel because of my scientific standpoint on life, there are a-lot of positive ways
and a-lot of negative ways to look at this situation.
My current feelings are:
- I feel upset that I now cannot have children through conventional methods of
intimacy without the danger of exposing my future wife, I mean, that's why
most heterosexual males are on this planet scientifically is to procreate, and if I can't
do that they way it was intended to, life seems more dynamic, yet more static.
In vitro fertilization doesn't make me think happy thoughts.
- All I ever wanted was to just be in a "OK" situation in life, and It just hurts my feelings
that there always has to be some obstacle in my way in order to achieve some moderate level
of peace.
- There is nothing I hate more than getting the common cold (retrovirus), or dealing with getting
a respiratory infection, and to know that one day, sooner or later, if its next year , or in twenty years
that will most likely be the thing that wipes me out.
- I have a small amount of hope that I can live with it for 10-15 years, for the next wave of medicine to come along, to hold it off for an even further amount of time.
- I'm quite upset at healthy facilities denying me Medicaid months ago because I was making too much money ($xx dollars) over the alloted maximum, they don't even factor in rent, I ran my body down working a bunch of hours at work, to try to meet their guidelines of getting covered under their policy, and I hurt my lower back and blew that. BUT NOW >:( that I have been diagnosed with a potentially life threatening disease if left un-neglected, the state has ALL these opportunities available and open for someone to receive care, that makes me angry.
If I could ask anything of this community, I would ask that someone please be my friend, and help me through this.
The only people I have in my life for support is my grandmother (who raised me), my mom and dad are dead,
and my girlfriend. I don't count the AIDS counselor, because unlike the AIDS Council, HIV doesn't have business days.
I would like some people in my life who understand HIV, and who can help me get through the initial barriers.
I'm open for email contact / instant messenger contact (whatever).
Anyone who wants to help me, could you send me a PM with some contact information?
Love,
Me
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That's a lot to respond to but I'll take a piece of it. I'm in the same boat on the invitro thing, it sucks, but at least there is a way. Before I got this I would have thought that it was impossible to have a child if one partner had HIV.
I've only told my wife about my status, my parents wouldn't be able to handle it.
I would highly recommend reading through the lessons on this site and some of the books off the reading list. Education is key to this thing mentally. The more you read the more you can relate and it sounds like you are good at relating with the epstein bar thing.
As long as you have access to treatment you have a great shot at living a long and healthy life, just remember that. I've been working 50 hrs per week or more every week over the past 6 months since my diagnosis and I've been on meds the whole time. I'm hanging in there. You hang in there, its going to be ok.
PM me anytime or post here and I'll try and reply.
E
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Dear POZ Community,
After heading down to the AIDS Council Center, after I was called by my counselor saying that "My test results were in, please come down so that we can go over them together". Sitting at the desk he said, "Your HIV Results for all CDC criteria came back negative, how do you feel about this."
I replied "Sir, I don't know really, I'm a little upset that I had to deal with these feelings, however unwarranted, perhaps I needed to feel them, in order to get further in touch with the rest of the world"
So I said "Here is a weird twist on this conversation, is this facility looking for volunteers?"
He happily said "YES", and told me to submit an application which I want to follow up on.
My experience since last Thursday, I was in full belief I had it, hence my post earlier, I was willing to do everything
within my power to help myself.
I apologize to the entire POZ community if I upset anyone. I believed 99.6% accurate was something to believe.
But perhaps this post can tell ALL who are nervous to go get tested, to get it done, and being positive, or negative,
IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD.
I love you all and hopefully my volunteered presence at the AIDS counsel will help others.
Love,
Dennis
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I've moved your thread over to this section. You actually are still waiting for your western blot result.
A positive on the ELISA is always confirmed by 1) re-testing on the ELISA and 2) a western blot test. If you test positive on ELISA and negative on the western blot then you are considered to be HIV negative. The western blot result trumps ELISA.
Since you won't have your result before March 30th, your thread belongs here.
We'll hope you get a negative. The western blot is very sensitive and specific so I wouldn't give up hoping that you may yet test negative.
Keep us posted.
Cheers,
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My second result was from a Western Blot
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EDIT : I took the ELISA based "Oraquick" : and the preliminary result came back positive, on that same day,
I submitted to a second test, which would be processed by western blot technology.
The results just came back earlier than thursday 3-30 which was the anticipated date
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And what was the result from the western blot? You haven't said.
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sorry to hear you tested poz. I tested poz 3 months ago and they have been the most difficult months of my life. I am now on medication because my numbers didn't look very good but have not had major side-effects with meds. You will do just fine, just promise yourself that you will not let this bring you down. Stay focus on the things you were normally doing and this is not the end for you. You have decades of life and it all depends on u how good these years will be. Don't fall into any drugs and alcohol and most importantly thank your close ones for being there for you in these harsh times. Stay in school and stay focus.
Al
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The Western blot test for bands
gp-160
gp-120
p-66
p-55
p-51
GP-41
p-31
p-24
p-17
All came back "not detected"
**** Interpretation (negative by CDC criteria)
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Wow congrats on your neg test...must be a relief.
Hey out of curiousity...What would cause a positive Elisa test and a negative Western Blot? If the Western Blots results always over ride Elisa results, why even bother with it and not just go for the kill with the western blot?
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INeed,
this is a roller coaster I wouldn't want to be in. I wish you good life and be sure to use condoms!
Milker.
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Congratulations INeed!
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Gun,
The information you posted in response to lostsnake's question was incorrect - in fact you would have found it on an hiv denialist site and we do NOT allow hiv denialist information on this website. I have removed the offending misinformation. In future, please leave the question answering to those of us who know what is and what isn't reliable information.
It is more likely that you had a test result that was not properly interpreted than a true false negative. The test center had no business telling you a "faint" line was a positive result. They should have repeated the test with another kit there and then, or they should have informed you that your result was inconclusive and done the blood test on that premise, not that you had a positive result. A "faint" line is NOT a positive result.
You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.
Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.
Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.
If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.
Ann
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Snake,
As I told you in your own thread, we need you to keep all your additional thoughts or questions in your OWN thread only. Please do not post questions in other people's threads. Thanks.
Ann