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Author Topic: Having a bad week.  (Read 3801 times)

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Offline gadawg1979

  • Member
  • Posts: 142
Having a bad week.
« on: June 26, 2012, 03:26:07 am »
I will re-update this later
« Last Edit: June 26, 2012, 06:38:19 am by gadawg1979 »
Diagnosed March 2012
Initial CD4- 156 VL 200K (started Complera) Genotype test no resistance
First labs on meds CD4- 246 VL 2K Taken after 30 days on Complera
90 Day labs VL 306 No CD4 Drawn
8/21/2012 CD4 474 VL Undetectable (40) %20.6
11/27/2012 CD 4 522 VL Undetectable (40)
2/14/2013 CD 4 464 VL Undetecable (30) 19.6%
6/8/3013 CD 4 528 VL Undetectable (30)
9/24/2013 CD 4 546 VL Undetectable (40)
1/30/2014 CD4 560 VL Undetectable (40) 22 %
6/19/2014 CD4 584 Vl Undetecable (30)

Offline BT65

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 10,786
Re: Having a bad week.
« Reply #1 on: June 26, 2012, 04:47:06 am »
Hi gadaway,
How is your partner's drinking effecting you personally?  I'm also in recovery, and while I understand addiction is (mostly) a chronic brain relapsing disease (told to me by one of my old professors), your diagnosis should not be an excuse for his drinking.  I can understand his feelings of being scared, but he needs to deal with these in ways other than hitting the bottle(s). 

If you've been with him through his last go-around with active addiction, you know you have to keep the focus on yourself.  If he's had 6 years of continuous sobriety, then he knows how to stay away from booze and drugs.  He's using your illness as an excuse for his continuing to drink.  And you can't be responsible for that, or for trying to get him sober again (I hate to use the word "clean," as many addicts I know take showers).  If things get bad, give him an ultimatum.  You do have the right to do that.  I totally understand addiction, and trying to live with a using addict/alcoholic, while trying to get your illness under control and deal emotionally with that, can be too much.  Don't take his shit on yourself.  Realize what he is doing is his decision alone, and has nothing to do with you. 

Believe me, there have been times through the previous years I have gone through stuff, and thought "it would be good to have a drink or (fill in the blank)," but I know what the end result of that would be. 

I also understand what it feels like being the partner of a using addict/alcoholic, and it's hell.  Do you have other friends in recovery?  I'm saying that because I assume he was going to meetings, and being that he had 6 years sobriety, I'm assuming you've met others in recovery.  If you have, then can you call them (or that person), and tell them what's going on?  Just don't go through this alone.  Often alone, while living with a using partner, we don't make the best choices, and often times need outside support to see things clearly.  Good luck, and take care of yourself!

Betty.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline gadawg1979

  • Member
  • Posts: 142
Re: Having a bad week.
« Reply #2 on: June 28, 2012, 01:56:58 pm »
Betty thanks.  After a long talk and an even worst morning we have worked through a lot of things and it has been a much better past few days...
Diagnosed March 2012
Initial CD4- 156 VL 200K (started Complera) Genotype test no resistance
First labs on meds CD4- 246 VL 2K Taken after 30 days on Complera
90 Day labs VL 306 No CD4 Drawn
8/21/2012 CD4 474 VL Undetectable (40) %20.6
11/27/2012 CD 4 522 VL Undetectable (40)
2/14/2013 CD 4 464 VL Undetecable (30) 19.6%
6/8/3013 CD 4 528 VL Undetectable (30)
9/24/2013 CD 4 546 VL Undetectable (40)
1/30/2014 CD4 560 VL Undetectable (40) 22 %
6/19/2014 CD4 584 Vl Undetecable (30)

 


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