I'm getting through this thanks to everyone's advise and suggestions. THANKS

[Sinsation]

Hello to all,

To those of you that have responded to my posts....thanks so much! It really has put me in a much better frame of mind since only joining this forum about a week ago. I'm very new to all of this since being diagnosed with (AIDS) CD4 105, VL 57,000 and I'm at 9%. Given that I was was diagnosed this past April I don't have the timeline that I've read about where some who are newly diagnosed having several years to wait until going on meds. I thought that maybe that would be the case for me. But it's not. So I'll be starting on my "cocktail" this week. I'm not sure why my numbers were what they were because I tested negative as of June of 05. Is this a "normal" occurrence? Another couple factors that may be the case but my doc won't confirm or deny the reason for my numbers are that I have Hep B. That possible could be one factor why my numbers are where they are. I also was getting strep infections all last year and i was taking Echinacea....aha!!! That also may be the reason for my low CD4 count. Although I'm not sure. But as most may feel starting on meds for the first time, I'm very anxious and scared. Although I do know I need the meds it's going to be a touch and go time for me in the next few weeks or so. Telling you all this is very cathartic for me. Just sometimes i feel so alone in all this. But thanks for being there guys. It sincerely has helped!! I will do my best to keep you posted with everything that is going on with me. I know we all have our battles in life and indeed it's not what we're given, it's how we deal with it. I've always had an optimist view on life and I have a saying that i find very simple and profound in my life and why i feel we're all here."Love, Learn, Laugh & Let Go". It's got me through some rough times in the past. I hope your days greet you with kind hearts and warm smiles...always!
Steve

[libra11_dj]

Wish u luck on ur meds...what r u taking?...and r u having any side effects?...Hugs.

[appleboy]

Steve,
Yes you sometimes have to let go.  I know the one thing that has helped me over the last year and 7 months has been laughter.  I wish you all the best with the meds.  If you feel down laugh hard and loud!
Thinking of ya!
AppleBoy

[frenchpat]

Hello to all,

 Given that I was was diagnosed this past April I don't have the timeline that I've read about where some who are newly diagnosed having several years to wait until going on meds. I thought that maybe that would be the case for me. But it's not. So I'll be starting on my "cocktail" this week. I'm not sure why my numbers were what they were because I tested negative as of June of 05. Is this a "normal" occurrence? Another couple factors that may be the case but my doc won't confirm or deny the reason for my numbers are that I have Hep B.

Hi Steve,

You're not the only one to wonder.
6 months after I was tested negative a positive test came up. My numbers then were cd4:350 vl 500 000. I did not have any kind of Hepatitis. I went first through a course of alternative medecines as I hated the idea to go for allopathic treatment. My cd4's stayed more or less stable, vl went down a bit... for about a year. Then the cds plumeted and vl shot up to over a million. I started meds

I've never found the reason for this. Could my first test have been flawed? maybe. Could I possibly have lived for a while (but no more than 6 months I am sure) with my unwanted guest and because of a healthy lifestyle (save for work stress) kept it in check? Or did overall stress weaken my immune system a longtime ago, opening the door wide open?? Questions, questions...

I finally gave up trying to figure this one out, and am now trying to find the best possible way of coping mentally, physically and spiritualy with the situation. Despite being a new member, I know that the people who gather here are already part of this quest.

Good luck, and let us know how you do

Pat