HIGH RISK ENCOUNTER WITH SEEDY STRIPPER

[VERY WORRIED]

Before i begin i know similar questions have already been answered but i feel my situation is very different.
I'm a 20 year old male living in the UK. The only sexual encounter I've ever had was the following-
4 and a half weeks ago i performed unprotected cunnilingus on a Russian stripper for 10-15 minutes to the point of ejaculation.
I feel my situation is different from the rest because i have a long history of dental problems... I had route canal treatment 2 months prior to the incident. Also i have to a permanent brace like band on the back of my top row of teeth which always creates sores/abrasions and cuts all over the mouth. I floss twice a day and had flossed twice on the day this happened. Clearly remember seeing blood after the flossing on the same day.
The combination of the severe dental issues that i have and the amount of time i performed the cunnilingus for and the fact ejaculation was involved makes me very concerned. I was very intoxicated throughout this whole episode if your wondering why i did such a stupid thing.
Of course this is all irreverent unless she was HIV positive. I am almost certain that she was for several reasons... This was a very seedy place just on the outside of London. I got in touch with the owner/manager of the club and asked if the girls are screened for STD's and the reply was "Our girls do not need to be tested for anything as customers are not aloud to be in contact with the girls" and i was cut off. This obviously put alot of fear in my mind. Also the girl said she was in her early 30's and said she has had alot of sexual experience before me and said the cunnilingus i performed was very good. She appeared to be high so i have it in my head that she may have been a drug injector of some sort. The cunnilingus was very aggressive .... lips/tongue was in full contact the whole time and my head was being thrusted to the point where i could barely breathe. I chaffed my tongue so much throughout the whole thing to the point where it was so soar to even eat for the next few weeks. I had also just started a cold the day before too, so my immune system was probably low. Alot of alcohol the day before as well as on the night.
I'm not going to go into detail about the symptoms that I've had in the last 2 weeks, all I'll say is I've had every single symptom you would get in the acute infection stage. Things like swollen lymph nodes (which I've never had before in my life) and oral thrush, Persistent cough, shortness of breath, lump feeling in throat, phlegm, night sweats, chills are some of the symptoms I've had.
Bottom line is i feel every possible factor was against me and i really don't know where to go from here. Please just give me your honest opinions... If you think i should test please say. Thankyou very much for everyones time. I know this was a very long post...

[Andy Velez]

Everyone who comes here worried always thinks their situation is "different." Most of the time they aren't unlike many others we have been presented with. Including yours.

The only confirmed risks for the sexual transmission of HIV are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. Everything else is risky only theoretically. Including your recent experience. There is absolutely nothing HIV-specific about any of the symptoms which you are misinterpreting as being about HIV.

You need to discuss your symptoms with your doctor. There is no need for HIV testing.

Becoming sexually active is exciting and also can stir up a lot of anxiety, which I think is playing a part in how you are reacting.

This is NOT an HIV situation.

[VERY WORRIED]

Thankyou very much for your reply Andy. You have almost completely put my mind at ease...
Though i just wanted to say i am still very upset and worried as the UK states that Cunnilingus is a 1,10,000 chance of transmission. I know this is low, but it is certainly not zero, Far from it. Also this with the combination of how every possible factor was against me i still can't rest. I've phone several UK helplines and they say it is low risk but there are documented cases of this occurring in the UK let alone anywhere else in the world....
I'm not trying to argue with your opinion by comparing it to all the other resources but i just wanted to ask what you think about this....
My doctor said my symptoms could be due to a normal cold/flu, but i still cannot understand why i am experiencing all the acute hiv symptoms and the fact that most of these symptoms I've never had before at any time in my life.... I find it very difficult to think that this is a coincidence....
Do you think i should take a test? Does anybody else have an opinion? Thanks

[Andy Velez]

As far as I am concerned the ONLY reason for you to get tested is if you need the inevitable negative result to let go of this concern. Yes, numbers can be tossed around to affirm what is still essentially a theoretical risk as far as we are concerned here. In the real world of HIV transmission just doesn't happen through cunnilingus, which you need to realize is one of the most common of sexual acts.

If your symptoms persist you should discuss them with your doctor. I do not see this as an HIV situation. Period.

And there is nothing HIV-specific about your symptoms.

[VERY WORRIED]

Thanks again, I really appreciate those 2 comments. This is my final post...
I can't help constantly beating myself up about how stupid it was what i did. I keep thinking it was the most dangerous/risky thing i could have done apart from unprotected vaginal/anal sex. I know that mutual masturbation is no risk and that receiving oral would have been no risk, but what i did was the most stupid thing i could have done, especially with my ongoing dental problems.
I know you say it's a common sexual act, but it can't be with high risk strippers/sex workers. If i had performed cunnilingus on someone who wasn't a stripper/sex worker i would not be worried in the slightest... It's the fact that it was with a high risk person, the length it went on for 15 minutes to the point of ejaculating, and most importantly my severe dental problems that has convinced me that every factor was against me for this transmission to occur.
My final questions are-
1.Are you saying it does not make a difference even if she was positive and the fact that it was aggressive cunnilingus that went on for 15 minutes including ejaculation, and the fact i have severe dental problems???
2.Is there not even the slightest possibility that i am positive???
3.Would you test if it were you??? 
4.I am going to test for other STD's as i understand these are more easy to transmit than HIV. If i have any other STD's from this incident does that mean i am at more chance of having HIV also???
Would really appreciate any reply from anyone.

[Ann]

Very,

People are not high or low risk, activities are. The activity you engaged in was not a risk at all for hiv infection.

1. Going down on an hiv positive woman is not a risk for hiv infection, regardless of your dental issues.

2. No.

3. No.

4. No.

It's time you gave this up and got on with your life.

Ann

[VERY WORRIED]

Hi Ann thanks for your post. I said i wouldn't post again, but i just had to ask you another question...
Sorry if it's a bit personal.... I've read several different subjects to do with cunnilingus on the "Am i infected forum" and in many different posts you have stated that you yourself practice oral sex with your partner... Is this true? Also have you done this at different times of the month and for different lengths of time like 15 Minuites for example? Again I'm sorry for asking these personal questions. I am still going mad with worry, still only sleeping 2 hours a night.
I know symptoms are not a reliable way to tell if somethings wrong when it comes to HIV but i cannot understand why I'm so ill... Swollen lymph nodes all over the body but especially on neck. Never had this before in my life. Cough, soar throat, difficulty swallowing and breathing. lump feeling in throat. no appetite for 5 weeks, constant fatigue, several cuts and ulcers keep appearing all over mouth and tongue. Whole body keeps clicking and shaking and muscles are very weak.
I know the only way is to test but i am certain i will never be able to go to a clinic and test. So i really don't know what to do. I am certain that the transmission has happened. Just don't know what to do.

[Ann]

Very,

Yes, I was with an hiv negative man for over eight years. The first year and a half we didn't know my hiv status and so never used condoms yet he remained hiv negative. After I was diagnosed with hiv, we used condoms for intercourse but not for oral and yes, we engaged in oral both ways, sometimes lengthy sessions and sometimes short sessions. He still tested hiv negative when we broke up.

As we always tell people here; hiv is much more difficult to transmit from a woman to a man, condoms prevent hiv infection, getting a blowjob is not a risk and neither is going down on a woman.

You really need to let this go. If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. IT REALLY IS THAT SIMPLE!!!

Ann

[VERY WORRIED]

Hi again, After just finally getting over my last incident i feel i have put myself at risk again now.
Again i feel my situation is different to others so i thought i would get your advise...
A couple of nights ago i was having a lap dance and this time i was very aware of the safe activities and the non safe activities, so i did what i thought at the time was safe but now I'm living in a world of worry and anxiety again.
The unknown stripper put here hand down my pants and rubbed my penis for about 15 minutes. I Thought this was a safe thing to allow her to do but i then remembered that i had shaved in that area the same morning and remember seeing a few cuts on the groin area. Do not know if she had any cuts  on her fingers or hand or not as it was dark and i had a Lot to drink. The thing that also worries me is that rather than being stroked like a hand job it was more of her rubbing her hand and fingers directly on to my urethra. She may have even caught it with her nail at some point as it was very vigorous. I had so much to drink that i was not even enjoying this, nor could i get an erection, but for some reason i let it continue. Also I'm aware that when exposed to air the virus cannot get in, but I'm scarred because there was no air involved as her hand was down my pants the whole time rather than having my penis properly exposed out of my pants. I hope that all makes sense.
The other exposure was with a different girl. This was sucking on her breasts/nipples for 15 minutes... Again this was something i thought was completely safe until i remembered my history with dental problems. So if there was hiv present my oral health is so bad that there would have definitely been a chance for transmission. Also i was in the middle of having a cold at the time and as i said had a lot of alcohol. Not sure if this could effect the proteins that would normally break down the virus if present. Finally to add to the problems i had a heavy nose bleed the same day in the afternoon. As i said i had a cold and from constant blowing my nose it had started to bleed. Anyway i didn't think anything of it when i went for the dances as i thought my nose wouldn't come into contact with any body fluids. But sure enough she did rub her nipples/breasts all over my face after i sucked them for a long time and so I'm scarred that there may have been a transmission there. Also my eyes have been very dry, red and itchy ever since so I'm worried some of her body fluids may have gone in my eye. I am almost certain that i didn't do anything else risky. I tried to avoid performing oral sex this time but as i had so much to drink that there may have been a chance that either girl may have brushed their vagina's on my face, as these were full nude dances.
I can't believe I've put myself in this situation again. I Don't know if i have put myself at risk this time or not. I do believe that I'm am still scarred from the previous events that have happened, and this may be why i am so frightened this time. I hope this extreme anxiety and worry is going to go soon. Thanks for being pateint and taking your time to read this long and complex story of mine... Any replies would be great.

[Matty the Damned]

Firstly, please use paragraphs. It makes reading your posts easier.

Secondly getting a handjob (from a stripper or anyone else) is not a risk for HIV infection. Never has been, never will be.

You were not at risk from this incident and you do not need to be tested for HIV as a result.

I have reviewed your previous posts and I see you are essentially asking the same question. It doesn't matter that the women you have sexual encounters with are strippers - you were not at risk. As Ann explained to you, HIV is not about who you are, it's about what you do.

Please read our Welcome Thread and take note of the posting guidelines. You will not be permitted to use this forums to post endlessly about non risk situations.

MtD