3 years on march 6th , 21yrs old

[Dontstop91]

hey what up everyone. new to this,

[WindySkies]

How well did you handle it being that you were 18 when you found out?

[Dontstop91]

i took it really bad.. i took it bad until a few months ago

[Ann]

hey what up everyone. new to this,

Hi Don't. Welcome to the forums.

You could start by telling us a little about yourself, like a little more about how you're doing in relation to hiv?

Do you have questions?

By the way, this doesn't really work like Instant Messaging. You can write a few paragraphs to get the conversation going.

Ann

[Dontstop91]

i found out i was hiv positive my first semester of college march 6 2010 . A man came to the college and talked to us about his hiv story . Immediately after his speech me and my cousin went to this van that was outside doing hiv testing . I was 95% sure i was going to come out negative . After i came out negative i had planned to always use protection so i could be 100% sure. Me and my cousin go into the van we fill out questioners about our personal life. She took the finger prick test first i went in write after her . The social worked told us we would have to wait 20 mins for the results. 20 mins go by and they call my cousin to the testing room . She comes out says "negative" i was so relived . I expected to hear my results soon after since we took the test nearly seconds between .Ten minutes had passed when the social worker called me to the back room where the nurse practitioner and the doctor was i found this odd because they didn't no do this with my cousin . The social worker then tells me "the test came back reacted" I broke down in tears. I was crying to complete strangers for about 15 mins. After the 15 mins i rushed to the front of the van i told my cousin lets go . She said whats wrong and i told her i am hiv positive. She then stood in shock . I pulled her off the bus . When i went on that bus i was the happiest college student everything seemed like they were falling into place i still contained my innocence. When i left that bus i was a hole different person i didn't even recolonize myself it was all down hill from there. I knew i would never be who i was again.

[WindySkies]

Well it sounds like your finally starting to come to terms with everything, and thats got to be the hardest part.  I think you'll find lots of answers here on this site.

[Dontstop91]

yes i started medicine (atripla) in november my viral load was 36000 and my tcells were 320 i  get my blood checked next thursday i am hoping for some type of improvement

[WindySkies]

I think you'll be pleasantly surprised which should lift your spirits.

[tednlou2]

Welcome to the forums, even though we wished you didn't have to be here.  It is good you found out so early.  You'll be able to get into care and make sure your numbers never drop really low, which is too often the case.

Did you have any regrets about testing with your cousin?  Or, did you find it comforting?  Has she been supportive?  They always have a mobile lab at gay pride.  Don't get me wrong, I believe they are a great tool to get people to test.  I just worry the ones who get the unexpected poz result have to immediately come out to family and friends.  I mean, unless they are really great actors.  We saw mostly smiles coming out of the van.  But, we did see some come out crying.  I thought how awful to hear that news and have to exit the van, where most would realize you got bad news.

Anyway, it is good to meet you and I look forward to hearing more from you.  All the best! 

[Anqueetas]

Trying to find you purpose in life in university is hard already. I'm know how you feel, well I found out when I was just turn 22 and at that time in my third year.  It tough but you can through it, you know who is your real friend and who are not. Family it all the matter to me, don't get me wrong but have spiritual support can also being very helpful. Since being poz about a year and a half, I been interest in Islam and been drifting to it ever since, it help me to hold on to life as it is, no matter how hard it turn out to be. Any form of spiritual support will do, have faith and be strong.