Went a Little Wild

[BabyBlue2012]

Hello all! I am a 28 y/o female who went a little wild this past year.  I have had about 7 partners this year, all of which have been protected.  However, I have a few concerns:

1.) With most of the encounters I took the condom myself and examined it...all was well.  With two of the encounters, the guys went to the restroom and removed the condoms themselves, so I have no way of knowing if the condom failed.

2.) During one of the encounters, I asked him to check to see if the condom was still on, it was not.  It was, however, hanging out of me.  I assume that it came off during withdrawal, because I didn't have to go digging for it.

3.) One encounter--with a very good friend of mine began unprotected.  I assumed that because we were close that I could trust him, then I snapped out of it.  4-5 minutes into the act, I made him put a condom on and a little over a month later, I asked that he be tested.  His results were ngative for everything STDs/HIV.

I think I have been pretty safe ,but need some reassurance.  I get tested annually during my anual PAP--appt coming up in May.  I took the Home Access test and what concerns me is that negative results are supposed to be availabe 24hours a day, yet I get a message to call back during 'normal business hours', which leads me to believe that I have to talk to one of their counselors---that can't be good.   Can someone assess my risks?

[Ann]

Blue,

1. They would have likely mentioned it if the condom had broken.

2. You're correct to assume it came off during withdrawal - this does not put you at risk for hiv infection. This is a pretty common occurrence if the guy doesn't hold on to the condom while withdrawing, so you might want to gently remind him.

3. You can never know your own hiv status going by someone else's test result. For all you know, he could have still been in the three month testing window for sex he had with someone else. This incident is the only risk I see in your post - and you need to test at three months past this incident for a conclusive negative result - your OWN result, not his.

Having to talk to a counselor at Home Access does not necessarily mean a positive result. They speak to many of their clients who have negative results.

You should have a full panel of STI testing - not just hiv. This isn't a judgement or anything, it's just what any sexually active adult should be doing at least once, if not twice a year.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann

[BabyBlue2012]

#3 occurred in December.  I am waiting in my test results as we speak. 

[BabyBlue2012]

BTW I do get the full panel STI w/my HIV test and PAP annually.  I just felt the need to emphasize my HIV test, as that is what my question is about.

[Ann]

Blue,

OK, thanks for the clarifications. It's good to know that you've already been getting annual STI and hiv testing done along with your PAP smear. Way to go!

Chances are good that you'll come out of this hiv negative. Just please learn from this and always insist on condoms - regardless of what you know or think you know about a person. Far too many people do not accurately know their hiv status and wrongly assume they're negative - and trusted friends are included in this category.

You can have as much sex as you want with as many people as you want - just keep making sure condoms are being used. It wouldn't hurt for you to read through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can make sure any guy you're with is using them correctly - and don't be afraid to gently correct him if he's doing something wrong (like not hanging on to the base of the condom during withdrawal).

You've been doing all the right things (most of the time!) - getting regular sexual health check ups and insisting on condoms. I think you'll be alright - just please do learn from this and don't give in to the bare-temptation again.

Ann