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Author Topic: Full analysis of activity (help)  (Read 16125 times)

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Offline redrash

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Full analysis of activity (help)
« on: December 27, 2006, 07:15:55 pm »
I made out with, rubbed bodies, and performed oral/had oral performed on me with two guys on the 9th and 15th of December. A few days ago, a red rash appeared on my chest, neck, and part of lower face. It kind of burns and it seems as though the lymph node below my right ear is slightly enlarged.

Am I at risk? Thank you.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #1 on: December 27, 2006, 07:38:45 pm »
There is no risk for HIV from receiving oral or rubbing or mutual masturbation.

As far as the risk for giving oral, there is much more evidence to support that it is NOT risky or at worst very, very low risk, particularly if no ejaculation takes place. It is not an activity about which we think testing is necessary.

Neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms will ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status if there has been a real risk, (which you incidents were not). Certainly there's nothing in any way HIV specific about the symptoms you are reporting including the rash. If your symptoms persist you should discuss them with your doctor.

Leave your lymph nodes alone. They're very sensitive to the touch and people often create a problem with them where none exists. Or exacerbate one by pressing, squeezing and otherwise manipulating them.

If you haven't already done so you should read the lesson on TRANSMISSION on this site. There's a link to it in the Welcome thread which opens this section.

In general we do recommend that anyone who's sexually active get a full STD panel done regularly -- at least annually. Other STDs are much easier to get than HIV.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline redrash

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #2 on: December 27, 2006, 07:42:23 pm »
I think there's so much confusion as to what does/doesn't cause seroconversion. It's difficult and hard to be sexually active when you have some expert sites saying oral is/isn't a risk.

But I will try to take your word for it and definitely have a full panel done. Thanks again.

411

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #3 on: December 28, 2006, 04:48:56 am »
It's difficult and hard to be sexually active when you have some expert sites saying oral is/isn't a risk.
You have to make personal choices based on your own comfort level. As Andy has already reported, the insertive partner in oral sex isn't at risk however the person performing oral may be placing themselves at a very very low level of risk, particularly if ejaculation occurs in the mouth. Rather than trying to assign a risk level it might be somewhat better to suggest that when it comes to very large numbers of people performing oral sex with ejaculation in the givers mouth a very very small number are thought to have become infected as a result.

Of course there are control studies out there that contradict as well as suppport the thought that oral sex is safe sex, hence the need to weight all the information currently available and decide what's right for you.

When it comes to testing questions, no one who is informed would suggest testing for having oral sex performed on you but those same individuals would suggest that you try to avoid having someone ejaculate in your mouth and when it comes to recommending a test for the receptive partner all the factors would have to be weighted on a case by case basis; such as, last time tested, frequency of oral sex, having many anonymous partners with ejaculation in the mouth, etc.

In your particular case it would appear that your risk was essentially nil and testing wouldn't be recommended from this incident however you should be getting a regular sexual health checkup at least once a year as other STDs are more readily passed on from oral sex to either partner.
« Last Edit: December 28, 2006, 04:52:13 am by 411 »

Offline redrash

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #4 on: December 28, 2006, 12:28:50 pm »
I'm terrified now. I just got back from the derm and found out I've got shingles. I don't have any other symptoms but this worries me very much. I'm 20 years old. Could it be stress related?

You said based on my experiences my risk is low but I am terrified. Do shingles come with other symptoms or by themselves?


Offline RapidRod

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #5 on: December 28, 2006, 12:38:32 pm »
So I take it you've had chicken poxs?

Offline redrash

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #6 on: December 28, 2006, 12:41:05 pm »
Yes I have.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #7 on: December 28, 2006, 12:57:05 pm »
Then you are acceptable to getting shingles. If you have shingles on both sides of your body then you doctor miss diagnosised you. Shigles on affects on side at a time. From the middle of your back to the middle of your chest, from the middle of nose down your neck all on the same side. Anyone can get shingles that has had chicken pox at anytime and yes stress can bring on shingles.

Offline redrash

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #8 on: December 28, 2006, 01:02:01 pm »
My doctor said it usually affects people under 10 and over 60, not in my age range.

I've never had unsafe sex, only low risk oral exposures, but this still concerns me greatly. Do shingles come with a host of other ARS symptoms? Or by themselves? I haven't felt tired or anything else.

Please be honest, give me an honest assessment.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #9 on: December 28, 2006, 01:07:05 pm »
First of all it IS NOT a symptom of ARS. Yes, it does come by itself. Age does not mean anything. Anyone that has had chicken pox at any age can get shingles.

Offline redrash

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #10 on: December 28, 2006, 04:57:29 pm »
So in other words I have nothing to worry about? I'm just confused as to how a healthy young person could get this.

Again, the only contact I've had is oral, kissing, and rubbing--nothing else. Do you guys still believe that I was at low risk?


411

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #11 on: December 28, 2006, 05:49:33 pm »
Again, the only contact I've had is oral, kissing, and rubbing--nothing else. Do you guys still believe that I was at low risk?

Yes and as rapidrod has pointed out, shingles can surface in anyone regardless of status. I would suggest continuing to work with your doctor to resolve this because this isn't a HIV issue.

regards

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #12 on: December 28, 2006, 06:27:54 pm »
Quote
Again, the only contact I've had is oral, kissing, and rubbing--nothing else. Do you guys still believe that I was at low risk?
Not low risk, it's NO risk. Just read the replies that you have already been given.

Offline redrash

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #13 on: December 28, 2006, 06:46:27 pm »
I really do appreciate it, guys. I was worried all day today. God bless you.

And just an additional question (which will probably also be a "no risk" answer)--what if I was masturbated with someone else's lube? Could the virus survive in the lube and infect me?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #14 on: December 28, 2006, 06:51:46 pm »
No HIV does not active in someones lube.

Offline Ann

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #15 on: December 28, 2006, 07:16:55 pm »
red,

Hiv does not remain viable and infectious outside the human body. Period.

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

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HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline redrash

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #16 on: December 30, 2006, 11:01:11 am »
Well needless to say, I just can't seem to let this go--I don't know what's wrong with me, but have to admit this rash (which I'm taking meds for) is freaking me out. People my age do get it, but it is very rare.

So I analyzed every guy I've hooked up with, since I've been hooking up (December 2004). The only time I got ARS-like symptoms was after a hookup in September 2004 that involved being masturbated with lube a guy took out of his pocket, and sucking him off without protection (he also had a cock ring). He did not ejaculate in my mouth.

In early October I got the chills, vomiting, not able to hold food down, checked for a rash or swollen glands, didn't find anything, headache. Now, this could have also been food poisoning because they came on suddenly one morning after a trip to a gas station to get some donuts that had been out all day.

But in Mid-December I come out with this rash and am freaked out by it. In the 8 guys I hooked up with between 12/04 and 4/06 the riskiest thing I did was suck off a guy/get sucked off (no ejaculation).

So is the timing of the rash emergence consistent with when I had my first ARS-like systems? I know it's rare, but it's weird to be 20 and have this.

Thanks.


Offline redrash

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #17 on: December 30, 2006, 11:03:21 am »
Sorry, said hookup occured September 2005, symptoms mid-October 2005, and current rash emerged mid-December 2006.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #18 on: December 30, 2006, 11:12:17 am »
Timing is off. You get symptoms if you get them at all 2-4 weeks after infections and they all go away in apx. 2 weeks. So as you see, your symptoms are unrelated to HIV.

Offline redrash

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #19 on: December 30, 2006, 11:17:59 am »
I thought you said the rash was not ARS related. You got it after the immune system was weakened?

So 15 months isn't when you'd see a rash in someone untreated?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #20 on: December 30, 2006, 11:23:54 am »
I have never had a rash and I've had this for 22 years.  Besides you did not have a risk and it is totally impossible for you to have any symptoms that are related in any shape or form, to HIV.

Offline redrash

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #21 on: December 30, 2006, 11:28:24 am »
When my derm asked me if I wanted an HIV test, that's what really freaked me out. He said Majic Johnson first found out when he broke out with shingles.

Then I told my doctor I had never had insertive/penetrative anal/vaginal sex at all. He said my risk was lowered but said whenever he sees people in my age range with shingles, he offers them an HIV test.

Feel like I am going in circles here but it's very concerning.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #22 on: December 30, 2006, 11:38:26 am »
Sorry you listened to your doctor, they were wrong.

Offline redrash

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #23 on: December 31, 2006, 07:23:49 pm »
So I'm taking meds for it now, but I'm still pretty worried.

In someone who was positive, when would shingles appear? The first of many OI's/how long after infection? I know you say my risk was nil but there are people even on this forum who believe they might have been infected through unprotected oral.

I'm not trying to be bothersome, I'm just really worried and freaked out. And I just remembered, that guy I sucked off (who's also in the Army) also face f&ked me, again no ejac/pre-cum, but still.....

Am I freaking out over nothing?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #24 on: December 31, 2006, 07:32:32 pm »
I got it 22 years after I was positive, but like you've been told before, you only have had to have chicken pox to get shingles. Forget about ARS and anything else about HIV. That is not what cause your shingles. You better take time to read the "Welcome" thread a pay particular attention to the paragraph about repeated questioning of non-risk issues. 

Offline redrash

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #25 on: December 31, 2006, 07:41:41 pm »
Okay, cool. So the consensus here is that I need to be having full panel STD tests, not HIV tests (unprotected oral w/o ejac). Because I will NEVER have any form of anal sex. Protected vaginal maybe, but never anal with another man.

I just want to be educated, and yes this will be my last question on the matter.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #26 on: December 31, 2006, 07:52:43 pm »
If you are sexually active, testing at least once a year, better if done twice a year. You will only need to test for HIV if you have a condom failure or you failed to use a condom consistently.

411

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #27 on: January 01, 2007, 05:10:01 am »
Red,
This is probably in vain but a family member is suffering from shingles right now. He's on medication for it and he is, without doubt, HIV negative. This is the first time for him and he's mid 30s, cause of breakout unknown. I have also seen other people suffering shingles and I can state without doubt that they occur regardless of HIV status.

Shingles is also challenging to accurately diagnose and is occasionally misdiagnosed, even by trained professionals.

Offline redrash

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #28 on: January 25, 2007, 12:22:41 am »
I'm sorry, I'm back. I just can't get this out of my head.......

Anyway, the last couple of days I've felt a bit tired a lot of the time. I don't know, the tiredness, the shingles. What's going on here?

I keep thinking back to all of my encounters--just oral, kissing, exposure to a small amounts of pre-cum.

Could I have gotten infected if someone stabbed me with a needle without me knowing? I'm just so scared.


Offline RapidRod

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #29 on: January 25, 2007, 04:01:16 am »
Seek the help of a mental help professional.

Offline ACinKC

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Re: Rash symptoms?
« Reply #30 on: January 25, 2007, 10:14:51 am »
You would know if someone JABBED you with a needle!
LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline redrash

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Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #31 on: February 03, 2007, 11:57:25 pm »
I'm going to list out all of my sexual activity, and even though a number of members here have assured me my risk is nil, my recent shingles experience has really got me scared. To make matters worse, I believe a number of the men I was with LIED TO ME about their status.

1.Guy from sex site. Being sucked off (no ejaculation), (UNKNOWN STATUS), (December 31, 2004)

2. Guy from school. Insertive/Receptive Sucking (1 to 2 minutes), rimming him, kissing. No pre-cum (UNKNOWN STATUS), (May 8, 2005).

3. Guy from sex site. Insertive/Receptive Sucking (1 to 2 minutes), rimming him, kissing. Small pre-cum (BELIEVED TO BE POS), (July 2005).

4. Guy from sex site. THREE TOTAL ENCOUNTERS. Receptive oral to ejaculation, NO SWALLOWING. No pre-cum. Insertive oral, being rimmed, kissing (UNKNOWN STATUS), (June - July 2005).

5. Guy from sex site. Insertive Sucking (unknown time), rimming several seconds, kissing. Small amount of pre-cum (UNKNOWN STATUS), (Aug. 2005).

6. Guy from sex site. Insertive Sucking (5 minutes), being masturbated with unknown lube, kissing, HAD A COCK RING (UNKNOWN STATUS), (September 2005).

7. Guy from school. Insertive sucking (4 minutes), swallowed pre-cum, kissing (UNKNOWN STATUS), (September 2005).

8. Partner #7. Insertive anal with condom (2 minutes), kissing, condom appeared to be intact, no ejaculation (UNKNOWN STATUS), (October 2005).

9. Guy from sex site. Mutual masturbation and kissing, he ejaculated on me (UNKNOWN STATUS), (December 2005).

10. Guy from school. Insertive/receptive oral, kissing, mutual masturbation, swallowed small amount of cum (UNKNOWN STATUS), (April 2006).

11. Guy from sex site. Inserive oral (3 to 4 minutes)., KISSING (BELIEVED TO BE POS), (December 8, 2006).

12. Guy from sex site. Insertive/receptive oral (1 to 2 mins)., kissing, mutual masturbation (very small amount of pre-cum), (UNKNOWN STATUS), (December 15, 2006).

********LATE DECEMBER 2006 - SHINGLES  :(

I'm so scared.......
« Last Edit: February 04, 2007, 12:15:49 am by redrash »

Offline gaz41

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Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #32 on: February 04, 2007, 02:28:52 am »
have you tested for HIV ?

Offline redrash

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Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #33 on: February 04, 2007, 05:29:45 am »
No, I have not. A number of the guys who were of unknown status have assured me that they are in fact negative.

However, I just feel that I was at risk. I'm very nervous.

Offline redrash

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Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #34 on: February 04, 2007, 05:39:20 am »
I should also mention that in each case, the amount of pre-cum injested was very small, and there was no known cuts/abrasions in the mouth.

Also, the guys "believed to be pos" have "ask me" under HIV status on their profiles. I do not know if they had HIV when we hooked up, or if they have it now. I asked them, and am waiting for a response.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #35 on: February 04, 2007, 08:37:41 am »
Do not start new threads. Keep all your questions and thoughts in your orginal thread.

Offline Ann

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Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #36 on: February 04, 2007, 10:03:47 am »
red,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

There's not much more we can tell you other than what we already have. Getting a blowjob is NOT a risk for hiv infection and neither is kissing. The risk involved in giving a blowjob is more theoretical than anything.

There have been long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one. This shows us two things. One, condoms are very effective for the prevention of hiv transmission. Two, oral sex is much lower risk than previously believed. We now have the evidence that oral sex (GIVING a blowjob) is a very low risk activity where hiv transmission is concerned. GETTING a blowjob is NO risk.

Why don't you just go get tested and collect your inevitable negative result. Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Ann

PS - by the way, forget this "ask me" nonsense. Many people who are hiv positive don't even know it. You need to treat every person as though they have hiv and protect yourself accordingly.

Remaining hiv negative is YOUR responsibility.

« Last Edit: February 04, 2007, 10:06:18 am by Ann »
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline redrash

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Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #37 on: February 04, 2007, 10:40:55 am »
Thanks Ann. So the only "risky activity" was the protected sex? Or was the injestion of minute amounts of pre-cum mor risky?


Offline RapidRod

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Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #38 on: February 04, 2007, 10:48:35 am »
You didn't have a risk with protected sex. Test and be done with it. This thread has gone on long enough. You've already been told shingles has nothing to do with HIV, it's caused by the chicken pox virus.

Offline Ann

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Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #39 on: February 04, 2007, 11:13:14 am »
red,

Protected intercourse is NOT a risk for hiv infection. Did you even read my post to you where I discussed the serodiscordant couple studies?

GIVING a blowjob is a very, very low risk activity. It happens, but rarely. Also, people often report giving a blowjob as their only risk because either they do not want to own up to unprotected intercourse, or they have forgotten what they did when under the influence of drink or drugs. Patient report is notoriously unreliable. The serodiscordant couple studies have shown us that it is indeed rare for someone to become infected with hiv through oral activities.

The ball is in your court. Either let this go, or test and collect your inevitable negative result - just don't keep coming here to wring your hands. Test and know the truth.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline redrash

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Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #40 on: April 07, 2007, 09:09:47 pm »
Ann or Andy, I have a few more questions and I am done:

Regarding shingles (which have not reappeared thank God), mine appeared on my upper right chest in a small patch, then spread up the nerve roots to my neck and also formed a small patch on my lower face.

On my neck, it was just a few (maybe 5 or 6) dots, but there was another small patch on right lower face. There are still scars, which everyday remind me of this and scare me. Do the position and severity of my shingles outbreak in any way, shape, or form seem to indicate infection?

Also, stupidly I hooked up with another guy. We made out, he performed oral on me, and I also performed oral on him (probably 7 to 8 minutes). I couldn't taste much pre-cum, but what freaks me out is that he made me finger his anus unprotected.

Would I be at risk? I hate being gay and I hate always being afraid. Thanks again.

Offline Ann

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Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #41 on: April 08, 2007, 04:53:36 am »
red,

Shingles has nothing to do with hiv. Anyone who has had chickenpox can get shingles. ANYONE.

what freaks me out is that he made me finger his anus unprotected.
 

He MADE you?  You do realise that you have the right to say "no thank you" to doing things that make you feel uncomfortable?

I hate being gay and I hate always being afraid.

Red, there is the real source of your anxiety. It must be awful to be so uneasy with your sexuality, but you can get help. Your sexuality is normal. Yes, that's right, it's normal to be gay, despite what some in society may try to tell you. You don't have to live with this fear and self-loathing.

I suggest you think about getting in touch with your local GLBT center - you may have to go to your nearest big city - and find someone to talk to. Most will have a counselor or peer counselor to help you work through these feelings. Unfortunately, this is outside the scope of this forum, but there is help out there for you if you look for it.

As for the risks involved in your latest encounter, your questions have already been answered in this thread. Re-read it again, because the answers are not going to change. And the anus fingering thing is not a risk for hiv infection.

Please, for your own sake, get some help in feeling comfortable with your sexuality.

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline redrash

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  • Posts: 21
Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #42 on: February 01, 2008, 07:09:29 pm »
Hey guys,

I'm back  :( And I'm pretty scared. A few days ago I came down with some symptoms and I don't know if it's a common cold or something associated with HIV infection. I have a runny nose, fever, chills, feel weak, and have coughed up some mucus, blown mucus out of my nasal cavity, and am not feeling well.

I'm 22 now - does this seem normal or should I get tested? All I've done is mutual masturbation and performed oral w/o ejaculation and had the same done to me.

Offline Matty the Damned

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  • Posts: 12,277
  • Antipodean in every sense of the word
Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #43 on: February 01, 2008, 07:17:09 pm »
Look honey,

I think it's time we drew a big pink line under all this hoo-haa you're going on with before it gets out of hand again.

We've explained to you on numerous occasions that oral sex and mutual masturbation do not transmit HIV. We've explained that symptoms are meaningless and that whatever is making you will it's not HIV because you've not been at risk.

Our answers aren't going to change no matter how freaked out you get.

Now, if you feel ill see a doctor. If you can't deal with the fact that you're a big homo, see a therapist. But whatever you do please understand that you won't be allowed to post obsessively here about non-risk situations.

You don't have HIV. You don't need to test.

Ya dig?

MtD

Offline redrash

  • Member
  • Posts: 21
Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #44 on: February 01, 2008, 07:20:36 pm »
Pneumonia typically comes after a upper respiratory infection like a common cold, which I just had two weeks ago. So I have no idea whether or not this could be pneumonia or just a cold.

Offline Matty the Damned

  • Member
  • Posts: 12,277
  • Antipodean in every sense of the word
Re: Full analysis of activity (help)
« Reply #45 on: February 01, 2008, 07:23:23 pm »
Sweetpea it could be fistulous whithers or galloping dandruff for all we know. Whatever it is, it ain't AIDS.

At this point I would draw your attention to our Welcome Thread and suggest you familiarise yourself with our posting guidelines, namely this one:

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.


MtD

 


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