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Author Topic: Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom  (Read 13045 times)

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Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« on: July 26, 2011, 04:42:49 pm »
Hello Ann , i have a question , my girlfriend is hiv+ one month ago i fingerered her for about five minutes and right after used the same hand to masturbate myself, some of her vaginal secretion got on the foreskin area as i am not circumsize. My penis was a bit inflamed from the rough masturbation , i was wondering , with the presence of inflamed foreskin and the fresh vaginal secretion getting on my penis , is it possible that i may have infected my self this way

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #1 on: July 26, 2011, 04:58:18 pm »
I've split your question from the thread in which you posted it. Our rule is that members are not supposed to write in the threads of other members unless authorized to do so. So please keep your entries in this same thread which is now yours.

As for your concern about HIV, you are worrying needlessly. The only confirmed risks for the sexual transmission of HIV are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. As long as you consistently use condoms for those activities you will be well protected. It really is that simple.

So nothing you are asking about put you at risk for HIV transmission and there is no need for testing.
Andy Velez

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #2 on: July 26, 2011, 05:04:54 pm »
hello andy , so not even the presense of chaffing on my foreskin or bruzing which have occured while masturbating with her vaginal secretion being used as lubrication places me at risk for hiv , remember andy she is positive

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #3 on: July 26, 2011, 06:08:33 pm »
When we evaluate a potential risk situation it is always with the idea in mind that the other person is HIV positive.

You are worrying needlessly. HIV is a fragile virus and is not transmitted in that manner. Additionally, the vaginal fluids which can contain HIV are high up in the cervical area of the vagina and would not be among the fluids which got on to your sore penis/foreskin.

Once again, non-risk situation.
Andy Velez

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #4 on: July 26, 2011, 08:48:39 pm »
Thanks very much for the risk assesment Andy , i know you said no test is required for this situation.
Knowing the mind that i have i may start the what if questioning all over again so because of me being a worried well i may just do a test to put my mind at ease. the encounter happened one month and three days ago , how soon do you think i can get tested and get a reliable result , two of the tests we use is called the unigold and determine antibody rapid test.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #5 on: July 26, 2011, 10:03:39 pm »
Both  of those are approved tests. If  you had a genuine risk for HIV such as unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse, then a negative result at 13 weeks/3 months would be conclusive.

In your case there was no risk despite your fears. The average time to seroconversion is 22 days. All but the smallest number of those who are going to seroconvert will do so within 4-6 weeks after a risky incident. A negative at 6 weeks means that in all likelihood there will be a negative again at 3 months.

In your situiation where we are essentially just talking about peace of mind, you just have to decide what will satisfy your unwarranted concern.
Andy Velez

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #6 on: July 26, 2011, 10:30:08 pm »
Andy this would be my final comment and question , I visited med help forum , there is a doctor called Dr Hans Hunter Handsfield , he seems to be well qualified in the field of hiv and its tranmission , someone ask the question wether hiv virus is found in vaginal secretion or in the cervix and his reply was how do you seperate whats in the cervix from whats in the secretion produced as lubrication meaning the two are always mixed together so it may be incorrect to say the virus is found in one and not the other because cervix fluid and vaginal secretion somehow are mixed, making vaginal secretion just as infectious and can  transmit the virus to a negative person , now Andy i am in no way trying to underscore you expertise, its just that i see two different views ,but non the less you both say there is no risk from mutual masturbation even if infected vaginal secretion is used as lubricant on the penis, now my final question, are there couples where one is positive and the other negative who engage in mutual masturbation and the negative partner never gets infected ?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #7 on: July 27, 2011, 08:33:48 am »
Frankly, I am not interested in "information" you are picking up from other sites. If you continue to look elsewhere on the net I can guarantee you will find "information" to feed your worst fears. And all to no good purpose.

There have been longterm studies of sero-discordant couples, both gay and straight. The only acts studied were oral sex and intercourse, both vaginal and anal, because the latter are the only confirmed sources of sexual transmission of HIV when unprotected. There was lots of mutual oral and only protected vaginal and anal sex. To date not a single sero-negative partner has become infected.

That's the deal. You can test if you want. It's totally unnecessary. And that's about all I have to say about your situation.
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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Re: Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #8 on: July 27, 2011, 08:52:12 am »
Boysie,

I agree with Andy - you have not had a risk for hiv infection. The activities you engaged in are commonly referred to as mutual masturbation and mutual masturbation is NOT a risk for hiv infection. Not one person has ever been infected this way and you are not going to be the first. You are also not the first to have rubbed his penis raw during masturbation, so this does not change our risk assessment.

Hiv is a fragile, difficult to transmit virus that is primarily transmitted INSIDE the human body, as in unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse where the virus never leaves the confines of the two bodies.

Once outside the body, small changes in temperature, and pH and moisture levels all quickly damage the virus and render it unable to infect.

The mucus that covers and protects the cervix is thick and tends to say in place. The thinner fluid that a woman produces when sexually excited comes from two glands on either side of the vaginal opening. I have not found one shred of evidence that this fluid is any more infectious than sweat, saliva or tears, and sweat, saliva and tears are NOT infectious fluids.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST SPECIFICALLY OVER MUTUAL MASTURBATION, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #9 on: July 27, 2011, 12:41:45 pm »
Hello Andy , in you last reply you said that studies were done on serodiscordant couples where lots of mutual oral took place and not one single negative partner became infected , did you mean lots of mutual masturbation took place ? I want to also take the time out to thank you Andy and Ann for the Scientific data regarding the Safety and non- risk associated with mutual masturbation , so should i continue to engage in this type of activity and feel secure that i would be infected from this at no point in time in the relationship. This is all we engage in.

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #10 on: July 27, 2011, 12:54:33 pm »
That should have read wouldn't be infected

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #11 on: July 27, 2011, 01:19:39 pm »
No matter what spin you put on it, mutual masturbation is not a risk for HIV transmission. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #12 on: July 27, 2011, 02:14:28 pm »
So Andy i will not  be infected with hiv when i masturbate after fingering my hiv poitive girlfriend and using some of her vaginal secretion as lubricant on my penis right , just double checking this info

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #13 on: July 27, 2011, 02:59:30 pm »
No, you would not get infected that way. Absolutely not.
Andy Velez

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #14 on: July 27, 2011, 03:43:03 pm »
Thanks very much Andy , You're a God sent. Even though you said i wouldn't get infected i still wouldn't engage in that type of activity, as a matter of fact i ended the relationship with my girlfriend because of the fact that i cannot deal with the stress associated with me being in that type of relationship.

On the 7th of August would make it six weeks since the incident and therefore I'v decided to get tested for that incident and will close the chapter on this hiv thing hoping the results will be negative. Once again Andy thanks very much , you and Ann keep up the good work of educating persons on the scientific findings in which it is proven that one can contract hiv

.......CHEERS....... 

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #15 on: July 27, 2011, 03:53:28 pm »
I am sure you will get a negative result based on what you have reported.
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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Re: Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #16 on: July 28, 2011, 08:57:12 am »
Boysie,

I was in a relationship with an hiv negative man for over eight years and he remained hiv negative. The only thing we did to protect his negative status was to use condoms for intercourse. He was in the building industry and often had nicks and cuts on his fingers, yet he never became infected through fingering. It just does not happen that way.

If your level of hiv paranoia is this high, then that woman is probably better off without you.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #17 on: July 28, 2011, 11:07:18 am »
Hello Ann thanks for that piece of reassurance , i am not concerned about getting hiv from cuts on my finger. I am worried about the secretion that is carried from my fingers to my penis right after fingering her . the secretion was still wet on my fingers and made contact with my bruised penis while i masturbated my self right after i fingered her and some of her secretion was massaged into the foreskin area , that is my biggest concern when it comes to hiv infection. so is there a slim chance that i can infect my self in that way Ann , is there a need for testing now that I've explained the exact scenario ?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #18 on: July 28, 2011, 11:10:46 am »
HIV is a fragile virus. It is simply not transmitable in a viable form in the manner about which you are concerned.

Use condoms for intercourse everytime and you will be well protected. Let this concern go and get on with your life. Really.
Andy Velez

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #19 on: July 28, 2011, 11:30:31 am »
hello Andy, have there been any cases of infection which has occur in the manner i just described to Ann where one person is negative and the other positive and the positive persons infected vaginal secretion is used as lubricant on the penis while it is sore and bruised during masturbation , just curious Andy.


Offline Ann

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Re: Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #20 on: July 28, 2011, 12:57:18 pm »
Boysie,

NO! Do you think my partner never touched himself after touching me? Hiv simply IS NOT transmitted in that way.

Hiv IS transmitted during UNprotected anal or vaginal intercourse or sharing needles for recreational drugs.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. IT REALLY IS THAT SIMPLE!!!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #21 on: July 28, 2011, 01:22:11 pm »
Hello Ann , thanks once again , what about if i fingered her until she had an orgasm and then used the orgasm fluid as lubricant wouldn't her orgasm have more of the virus because it came from her cervix making her secretion more infectious and making it viable for the virus to be transmitted , isn't the bruise under my fore skin an entry point for the infected orgasm secretion that has been transfered from my hand to my penis a place where the virus can enter into my blood stream ?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #22 on: July 28, 2011, 01:40:29 pm »
No, no and no. No matter what your head is telling you that wasn't a risk.

You don't have to believe us if you don't want to.  You can always waste resources and money and collect the inevitable negative result.

But I will tell you that we are not going to continue to respond to more of your but what ifs. If you come back again with more of the same over this non-risk incident you are going to find yourself getting a 28 day Time Out from the site. Consider yourself warned.

HIV is not your problem this time. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #23 on: July 29, 2011, 02:19:33 pm »
hello Andy, i had a rapid test done today , using SD bio line antibody test it is exactly 5 weeks since the incident with the vaginal secretion from my hand getting on my fore skin , the test came back negative, i couldn't wait until six weeks so i had it done today, do you think i could move on with my life from this point or should i get tested after the three month period to get a conclusive. can this five week test be considered conclusive in my situation ?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #24 on: July 29, 2011, 02:29:11 pm »
That negative result is no surprise here. Stop with the unnecessary drama, forget about any more testing and just get on with your life.

Happily HIV is not your problem. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #25 on: July 29, 2011, 02:34:24 pm »
Hello Andy , do you think the 5 week mark is enough time for me to have developed detectable if i was infected.

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #26 on: July 29, 2011, 02:36:26 pm »
detectable antibodies that should have read

Offline Ann

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Re: Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #27 on: July 29, 2011, 03:22:35 pm »
Boysie,

You have NOT had a risk for hiv infection. You are conclusively hiv negative. You do NOT have hiv!

I'm giving you that time out Andy warned you about. Do not attempt to create a new account to get around your time out because if you do, you will be permanently banned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #28 on: September 09, 2011, 02:52:56 pm »
Hello Andy , i would like to know if when taking off a condom some of the woman's secretion comes into contact with the tip of the penis can i become infected this way

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #29 on: September 09, 2011, 03:39:17 pm »
Hello Andy , i would like to know if when taking off a condom some of the woman's secretion comes into contact with the tip of the penis can i become infected this way

No you cannot. HIV cannot survive outside it's environment. You cannot become infected by taking off a condom.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #30 on: September 09, 2011, 03:47:01 pm »
thanks JK , i usually take a shower after intercourse but on this occasion i didn't so i was a bit worried that some of her secretion might have remained on my penis head while pulling of the condom. I did an hiv test ten weeks after mutual masturbation with an HIV positive young lady the test came back negative. Ann and Andy assured me their is no risk of transmission from that type of activity even if secretion got on my penis. do you think with the ten week negative I'm in the clear ?

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #31 on: September 09, 2011, 03:55:29 pm »
You also cannot get HIV from mutual masturbation. Ann and Andy and I use the exact same criteria for our assessments - First tiered peer-reviewed scientific data.

You are in the clear because you never had a risk in the first place.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline boysie

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #32 on: October 29, 2011, 03:48:48 pm »
Ok Ann and andy , i did my test 14 weeks post my encounter with hiv + partner , the test was negative.
Am i in the clear now? whats the likely hood of testing positive after 14 weeks

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #33 on: October 29, 2011, 05:17:58 pm »
You are in the clear because you never had a risk in the first place
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: To Ann or anyone with some words of wisdom
« Reply #34 on: October 29, 2011, 05:59:13 pm »
You are HIV negative. You never had a risk. Stop all this unnecessary drama and get on with your life.

If you come back here again about this same incident you are going to find yourself getting a Time Out from the site.

Be glad you're well and move on.
Andy Velez

 


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