Please please help Condom breakage very worried

[Tj5983]

Hi everyone 12 days ago I had protected sex with a sex worker coming towards the end the condom burstand i finished i can't of been inside her for more than 3 or 4 minutes as I kept checking all the way through,I panicked pulled out washed myself with water.i then had a conversation with the lady about her sexual health,she said she was fine but I was so worried I asked her if she would come for a rapid test with me,she agreed and we both went for a test,as she also wanted to see about my status.we both came back negative how ever I am still very concerned about this windw period,also I have some psoriasis on the head of my penis which really concerns me,would this be an easy route for transmission??any way 3 days ago I started getting a mild sore throat,went to the docs and he said that it's nothing to worry about just a small viral thing,it has nearly completely gone today.last night in bed I sweated a little bit but my girlfriend also did,maybe we were just hot or is this a sign of something more serious??I am panic stricken and guilt ridden at the moment I am terrified I have HIV,I won't sleep with my girlfriend as I would not want to put her at risk,could you please give me some reassurance and answer some of the questions I have asked and are my chances very high that I have HIV with theses symptoms and the exposure which i had??thanks in advance.
  Kind regards tj

[Andy Velez]

Nothing you are reporting symptomatically is in any way HIV specific. That's not surprising since even if you had greater risk than you did with the bursting condom, it would be too early to be showing symptoms. Although you did have a risk it was a very low level one.

You can test at 6 weeks for an initial result. Assuming you test negative, which is what I expect, then in all likelihood you will continue to test negative for a conclusive result at 3 months.

Through the years we've never had anyone end up testing positive after a single condom break such as yours. HIV is not an easy virus to transmit. It is significantly harder to accomplish from female to male as contrasted with the other way around. And this was a single and brief incident. Which all lead me to expect you ultimately to test negative.

Your symptoms are something to discuss with your doctor if they persist because I don't see them as having anything to do with HIV.

[Tj5983]

Hi Andy and thanks for your reassuring reply,the worry and anxiety has been taking over my life,I will get tested at six weeks,just one thing what do you think about the pshoriosiss on the head of my penis,assuming the girl was in her window period would it transmit easier through that,it is just a red patch not an open wound?
Kind regard tj

[Andy Velez]

Naw, that would not raise the very low level of risk in this incident.

Really, I expect you to come out of this ok.   

[Tj5983]

Hi again Andy,,I went to sleep last night very reassured after reading your Replies,but I've woken up this morning with this slight sore throat again:-(and once again I am panicking,I'm not sure whether this is all anxiety related or not,could it be??you said you've yet to see the insertive partner contract HIV after an exposure like mine,even after 3-4 minutes? Thanks Andy for your time and patience with me.i don't mean to be rude and if you don't want to answer that's ok but how are you so knowledgable in this area once again warm regards tj

[Andy Velez]

Listen, between now and the grave in the hopefully far distant future in years you will undoubtledly have all sorts of sores, bumps, sore throats, stuff noses and any number of physical events happen. That's the way our bodies are. Nothing you are reporting is in any way HIV specific.

Yes, I expect you to come out of this experience ok.

You can look up my profile to get some information about me.

[Tj5983]

Hi again Andy,its 2 weeks now and the stress and anxiety are really getting to me,I can't think of anything else,it's taking over my life,im a recovering cocaine addict it's been 4 half years,and I'm fighting every hour every day not to relapse over this situation,I still have sore throat and now swollen glands in my neck,and all I can think about is HIV,i understand you said that you've never seen the insertive partner contract HIV in my situation but all I can think is that I'll be the first one,pathetic I know.i know there's probably not much more you can say to me,but maybe if you could just help me get through this with some reassurance I would greatly appreciate it
Thanks Andy tj

[Ann]

Tj,

I also fully expect you to come out of this ok, but you do need to test to make sure.

Hiv is much more difficult to transmit from a woman to a man and your very brief possible exposure (you don't know for sure this woman is poz) is very much in your favour.

I speak from experience. I was with an hiv negative man for eighteen months before I was diagnosed with hiv. As it was a new relationship and we were in love, we had quite a bit of unprotected intercourse before my diagnosis.

He tested hiv negative, and remained hiv negative during the rest of our relationship too. We used condoms AFTER my diagnosis, but not before. We were together for over eight years.

Even after eighteen months of plenty of unprotected intercourse, he remained hiv negative. I hope this puts your two or three unprotected minutes in perspective.

You do need to test to make sure you are hiv negative, but again, I fully expect you to come out of this ok and hiv negative.

Ann

[Tj5983]

Hi Ann,
Thanks for your reassurance,and quick response,me and the lady,both had rapid tests straight after because we were both concerned and both came back negative,,I understand the window period,is three months but I have also been told that most people will show up positive in 25 days?so if that's the case the chances would be even slimmer right?
 Ann,am I being completely irrational by worrying this excessively over this brief exposure?
 Warm regards tj

[Ann]

Tj,

Yes, you're being irrational and worrying excessively. Stop it.

Like Andy, I've yet to see the insertive partner end up positive over a broken condom. I don't expect you to be the first in over eleven years of my experience in this forum. Added to my personal experience, I fully expect you to test conclusively negative.

The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six weeks, with the average time to seroconversion being only 22 days. A six week negative must be confirmed at the three month point, but is highly unlikely to change.

I do not expect your result to change from the rapid test you took earlier.

I suggest you stay off hiv websites and get busy with other things while you wait for the appropriate time to test again (six weeks). The time will go faster than you might expect if you keep your mind on other things.

Ann

[Tj5983]

Hi Ann,thanks for your advice,And I'm going to try and take it,as difficult as it is with my irrational mind I'm gonna try,
You and Andy have both been wonderful in helping and advising me.
Warm regards tj