Disclosing....

[ALH300]

Wow, what a weekend! I have been recently diagnosed and was fortunate enough to be able to tell about 90% of my friends and family. They all kind of knew something was up, so I figured what the hell....I don't want to keep this secret forever. I was actually shocked and suprised with how well they all handled the "news". There was a lot of "no matter what we still love you" "if you ever need anything lets us/me know". For being a redneck in rural Iowa I was suprised! Hopefully the whole stigma thing is dying. I think not too long ago the stigma about cancer is like what it is today with HIV. I am sure not everyone will look at us the same but hopefully this will change with time. People are very stubborn and set in their ways. All we can do is hope! All we need is a few more celebrities or high profile people to come out about their status and there will be alot of changes on how HIV is viewed.

Peace!!!!

[MOONLIGHT1114]

Hi ALH,

I'm glad to hear of the good outcome with your disclosing to your family.  I was diagnosed pos in late 93 and didn't tell my brother until 4 yrs later, parents a little after that.  I kept it very quiet. 

I still feel that the stigma is out there, unfortunately, but I am personally trying to do little things in my own world to change the stigma around me.  It takes baby steps, as I'm sure you know. 

Know that by posting this topic here that you're helping others to be hopeful, as well!

Keep Smiling!

~Cindy

[koksi]

Thanks ALH, it is really heartening to hear this story.

[JPinLA]

That's great to hear!  I still have not told most of my family or friends because of my fear of stigmatization (and I am not talking the holy kind either..).

I am hoping that when the time comes it was me merely being paranoid and that I will have a very similar experience as you have had. 

Jason

[red_Dragon888]

I wish you all the best.

[xyahka]

Hey so glad to hear everything went well with you. I also disclosed my status to my family members and most of my friends. Almost no rejections (just the person i was dating at that time) and even though everybody was a bit scared about it at the beginning, at the end they all started to educate themselves and have a better understanding of what living with Hiv means nowadays.

I agree with you that stigma is dying, slowly but it is dying. Glad you took the step forward, it brings lot of peace... i think you already know it by now.

hugs,

Juan Carlos

[DanielMark]

ALH,

Good for you for disclosing your diagnosis so quickly! Your health will thank you for it in the long run.

It's my belief that when we keep HIV in the closet, we only help feed the stigma (tho I recognise for some it might jeopardize their jobs). If we want that to change then we need to be brave.

The way I see it, keeping secrets is a burden my health can’t afford, so I disclose – with discretion of course – whenever I feel the need to. If nothing else, it sorts out the ones who can be supportive from the ones who won’t be.

Daniel

[ALH300]

Thanks for the replies! It's was probably one of the hardest things I have ever had to do in my life besides having an HIV test. I figured I needed to get it off my chest and I really wanted to know who my real friends were so I didn't waste time and energy on people that don't really care about me. The more people that discover and learn about HIV will really really help in the long run. It is our job as HIV+ people to help others with or without HIV learn and understand what this whole thing is about. Although I am newly diagnosed I want to try to change peoples thoughts and views about HIV.