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Author Topic: worried I gave my partner HIV  (Read 1819 times)

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Offline purplepozzie

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worried I gave my partner HIV
« on: August 30, 2015, 11:36:06 pm »
Hi. I recently started having a sexual relationship with a long time friend. I was completely honest about being hiv positive. Before we decided to engage in sexual behaviors we talked about it, we also did research together regarding possible risks. First time he went down on me. We did not have vaginal sex. Weeks went by and we had vaginal sex with a condom. I get a text from him the same night we had sex stating that he never told me but he had been feeling sick along wwith numbing and tingling in his hands and feet. I'm terrified that I could have infected him. I'm a long term hiv poz (born positive) and this has never happened before with past partners. I bought him an oraquick test which was negative. He's really angry with me as if I hid this from him him which I did not. Should I be so worried?

Offline Joe K

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Re: worried I gave my partner HIV
« Reply #1 on: August 30, 2015, 11:48:53 pm »
Hello Purple,

You have not put your partner at risk, either through oral sex or protected intercourse.  The only caution I might offer is, depending upon where you live, to check and see if there are any laws regarding disclosing your status.  You have not done anything that puts him at risk at all.

Specifically, regarding HIV transmission, doesn't stand a chance of happening via female genitals to mouth - there are just too many obstacles on the oral route.

The first obstacle is the mouth itself.  The mouth is a veritable fortress, standing against all sorts of pathogens we come into contact with every minute of our lives. It is a very hostile environment and saliva has been shown to contain over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage HIV.

HIV is a very fragile virus - literally.  Its outer surface doesn't take kindly to changes in its preferred environment; slight changes in temperature, moisture content and pH levels all damage the outer surface.  Importantly, it needs this outer surface to be intact before it can latch onto a few, very specific cell types and infect. 

Which leads to the second obstacle. HIV can only latch onto certain types of cells, cells which are not found in abundance in the mouth.

The third obstacle to transmission this way is having HIV present in the first place.  The female secretion where HIV has been shown to be present is the cervicovaginal fluid.  This fluid is actually a thick mucus that covers and protects the cervix.

The fluid a woman produces when sexually excited comes from the Bartholin's glands, located on either side of the vaginal opening.  We have yet to discover one shred of evidence that shows this lubricating fluid to have any more HIV present than other bodily secretions such as saliva, sweat or tears.  Saliva, sweat and tears are NOT infectious fluids.

So there you have it.  Once the results of the serodiscordant studies started rolling in, what we know about HIV transmission on the cellular level was validated.  The only people who were getting infected were those who had unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse.  Period.  One of the three studies went on for ten years and involved hundreds of couples.

I hope this helps and welcome to the forums.

Joe


Offline purplepozzie

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Re: worried I gave my partner HIV
« Reply #2 on: August 31, 2015, 12:09:17 am »
Thank you so much for the reply. I feel much more at ease now.

 


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