A fabulous new thread on HIV disclosure (we can never have enough!)

[Miss Philicia]

I came across this lil' juicy nugget and thought some of our esteemed members might find interest in this topic:

http://www.thehivconversation.com/

Seems to be a book and film about HIV disclosure, so if that preoccupies every waking moment of your life give it a go. 

I'm still reading the web site, but I'm rather distracted at the moment because I lost a man purse last night.

DISCUSS++

[thunter34]

Looks great, but I'll have to peek at it later.  I get disclosured out at this joint as it is. 

I've mastered my own HIV conversation:  I'm positive.  Deal.

[Miss Philicia]

I see that this project is located in AUSTIN... hmmmmm.  Or am I being a little bit suspicious?

[Buckmark]

Why do you view Austin with such suspicion, Philly?   

Yes, indeed, the individual putting together this book and
film is based in Austin.  Can't say that I know him.  At least
from the web site, he seems to think somewhat highly of
himself. 

The web site does say some of the profits will go to charity. 
Where will the others go?  Not that there will likely be excessive
amount of money made on this, but still, it seems odd to
be making any profit from other's people's tales of disclosure.

I can see that something like this may be a big help for those
who have difficulty disclosing.  And increasing the number of
people who disclose is one way to fight stigma.

However, like our beloved Timmy, I'm totally over the disclosure
topic at this point.  I almost want a T-Shirt with a quote from
his post above:

"I'm positive.  Deal."

Sweet!

Henry

[BT65]

David, will you be filling out the questionnaire so you can contribute your wisdom?

[Miss Philicia]

doubtful... I'm busy re-arranging my apartment.  Anyway, my idea of disclosure is telling people that I have the Devil's seed and that I picked up from a toilet seat at the Sound Factory men's room toilets, 1992

[thunter34]

I see that this project is located in AUSTIN... hmmmmm.  Or am I being a little bit suspicious?

Hmmmm....

  At least from the web site, he seems to think somewhat highly of himself. 

Hmmmmm.....

[Miss Philicia]

That's a lot of "hmmmmmmm" -- if we're lucky we'll learn that the web site is hosted in Vermont.

[TheConversation]

Hello everyone.  OK, thanks for the 'lil juicy nugget' about my project.  Granny always said that as long as people were talking about you it was good, only get worried when they stop talking about you.

Yes, I'm the person who "seems to think somewhat highly of himself." I'm not sure what comments on the website would lead one to believe that I think too highly of myself, but if believing I can do something to help others and change the current stigmas associated with HIV, then maybe I do think highly of myself, but please read closer as this project scares the hell out of me and challenges me in ways I never dreamed and it's very hard on me to do this. 

Yes, I live in Austin, Texas, currently.  However, if you know anything about Austin then you'll know it's not like any other Texas city (and no the Bush's are not a Texas family, they're from Connecticut.)  Austin's a very liberal town.

The question about the profits can easily be answered now because the whole project is being turned into a nonprofit organization hopefully part of another organization - www.PozIAm.com - thus all proceeds will be going to fund HIV awareness and education programs, along with supporting the existing programs mentioned.  I agree that no one should profit from the stories of others, so thus the nonprofit status, but we had to wait until we knew for sure if we could work out the arrangements for such.

Hmmmmm........... Hmmmmmm.......   Nope, not hosted in Vermont.  But we are going to be improving the current website (which I have been doing myself) because we have a person who is going to create it for us now. 

Disclosure shouldn't preoccupy anyones life.  The book and film project are to help remove the current stigmas related to being HIV positive and to provide education.  We should all be able to freely disclose to anyone without fear.  Some of us have reached that point in our lives that it's easy to disclose and we don't worry about it anymore - I'm positive. Deal! - but there are many people out there that don't know how to deal with being positive yet and those people need support, encouragement and friends. 

Thus, thanks for allowing me to fill you in a bit about me, the project, and such. 

Sebastian St.Troy
"The Conversation" A Book and Film project about HIV disclosure.
http://www.theHIVconversation.com

[thunter34]

Some of us have reached that point in our lives that it's easy to disclose and we don't worry about it anymore - I'm positive. Deal! - but there are many people out there that don't know how to deal with being positive yet and those people need support, encouragement and friends. 

Absolutely agreed.  And please don't infer from my previous "I'm positive -  Deal" comment above that I was trying to be dismissive of your aims at all, Sebastian.  I was just simply stating the place I have reached with the disclosure issue. 

Tim

[newt]

I was disappointed my reply to the question "Are those vitamins?" from a work colleague over monthly birthday cakes provoked the supplementary "Oh, can you eat cake with those?" followed by a return to persusal of the latest edition of HEAT magazine (my exact reply was "No, that's my daily prescription for chronic HIV 1 infection").

If only it was always this boring.

- matt (blue and white tablets) the newt

Edited for fomatting

[thunter34]

HEAT Magazine?  Hmmmm.....

 

[Winiroo]

I'm responding to this because I want it to be in my reply box so I don't loose it tommorrow when I have time to read in more detail.

Being a Texan I am intrigued but I don't have enough time tonight to read.



I'll post tommorrow with something better than this...Lovins!

[Lis]

conversation and Newt  1 all others 0

[Oceanbeach]

Hey Sebastian,

I have probably written a couple thousand words on the topic of disclosure (recently) and right here in these Forums.  Over the past two months we (Forum friends and myself) have gone through my chance meeting online, first date disclosure, almost give up, the second date, plans for third date, fourth date, and as of today, a fifth date    Having lived with AIDS for 12 years and having been alone for the past 8 of those years, I would not have gotten this far without the support of our Forum friends and having built and managed a site on RWCA Funding, for a couple of years, I will be happy to read your work.  

First, since I have been walking in the clouds for a few and have been enjoying a little J&B rocks with water back,  I feel like breaking into song  Chris Riddle has been conducting his Uncle Nelson's orchestra and has offered accompanyment.
"Theres a saying olde, says that love is blind
Still we're often told, seek and yee shall find
So, I'm going to seek a certain man, I've had, in mind
Lookin everywhere, haven't found him yet
He's the big affair, I can not forget
Only man I've found, I ever think of with regret

I'd like to add his anitial to my monogram
Tell me where is the shephard for this lost lamb?

There's a somebody, I'm longing to see
I'll hope that he,
Turns out to be,
Someone who'll watch over me

I'm a little lamb, that's lost in the wood
I knew I could
Always be good
To one, who'll watch over me

Although, he may not be the man
Some gays think of as handsome
To my heart, he carries the key

Won't you tell him to please,  put on some speed
Follow my lead
Oh how I need Someone to watch over me, Someone to watch over me."  Have the best day
Michael
 

[Queen Tokelove]

Yep, disclosure has been mentioned quite a bit. I will still say it is a personal choice. People have their reasons for not screaming it from the mountain tops and I feel people should respect it. Until you know what a person has gone through personally with disclosure, folks should ease up. Eventually when a person is willing to share their status, they will. Not everyone keeps quiet due to being ashamed. I could go on but someone (can't remember who at the moment) started a thread on disclosure in the Women's Thread...Privacy vs Secrecy, fellas check it out but don't respond there since it is just for us ladies. Maybe you might want to talk about it here or someone start another thread. Who can understand someone being silent and will let no one force me to disclose before I am ready. It has happened to me before and I will not let it happen to me again...Just my 2 cents..

[thunter34]

conversation and Newt  1 all others 0

gee thanks for keeping score there, Lis.  you know how we depend on you for that.

[Winiroo]

I'm really impressed with the HIV conversation site and the brave stand to say "I have HIV" or "I have AIDS" reguardless of how your audience may take the news.

Since my diagnosis I never dated any men who where not positive already. I went out and socialised but I did not tell anyone I was positive. It never seemed necessary as that I was not doing anything remotely intimate with anyone.
I never had the courage to try and date outside the HIV community. Its worked out ok for me though. Over the years I've met a few decent men and one in particular I wouldn't want to part with.

I'm not especially secretive about my status. There are quite a number of people who know I have AIDS. But I haven't made a point to stand up and say it outside of the internet and years ago talking on behalf of a children's HIV charity.

After being positive 15 years I'd likely be strutting around with a I'm Positive tshirt if my boyfriend was more out. I respect his need for privacy so I'll refrain from wearing a I'm Positive shirt. LOL
www.winiroo.com
That's about as far as I've gotten to a public eye and my HIV status. That site was a pipe dream I never really followed up on.

But seriously. Great idea. I applaud all that are participating. Kudos
I'll save the link and check in on the page on occasion.

[thunter34]

We should let bimazek know about this.  He's been looking to do something activist to counter stigma.  This would be a great starting point.


http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=20080.0

[Winiroo]

Done

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=20080.msg261302#msg261302

[TheConversation]

Tim, these days allowing people to speak their minds is a good thing.  Thank you for providing clarification for the comment.  Like you, many of us have reached that point and it's no longer a concern for disclosure.  I just hope more people can find themselves again to also be able to make such a statement.

Lis,  I can only be amused by your comment.  Thank you.

Michael, the topic of disclosure shouldn't be something we fear, should be something that even HIV negative people talk about, and should be something that all of us who have been doing it for a while could share with others so they can learn what we've gone through.  There are a lot of newly diagnosed individuals out there who need friends, especially all of those who have been failed by their churches, families and friends.  I've recently talked to a lot of straight women who found out they were positive when their husbands were hospitalized with an AIDS diagnoses.  These people never thought it could happen to them, but they were wrong, and that's the story we have to get across.  It can happen to anyone and when it does, we're here to help.

Queen, Yes, the topic of disclosure doesn't have to be open and there are times when it should be a private conversation.  However, no matter how or when, if you're HIV positive, it has to happen if we respect ourselves and others.  I respect the right of others to choose when and with whom to have "The Conversation", we're just trying to help others see what others go through so maybe they can find support and strength to have their own conversations.

Wendy, thank you for your kind words of support and encouragement.  Shucks, I might have to start selling some t-shirts through the website to help fund the project.  Anyone want to buy one?  "Positive? Ask Me!" "I'm Positive! Deal!"

Tim and Wendy, I posted some ideas for the person that wants to do the March on Washington, as I didn't think he had through it through very well, or might not know how DC works.  I hope it helps him with his project.

OK, back to trying to find an apartment in Austin as I have just returned from backpacking in Central America for the last 6 months. 

[Winiroo]

LOL I like the tshirt idea. Not sure you'd have a huge demand for the shirts though.
I might have to buy one for when I go to my hetero social gatherings.

Austin is nice. I haven't been there since I was a teen but I seem to recall it was a pricey place to live.

[TheConversation]

Hi everyone;
I just wanted to drop by to say Hello.  I'm in the process of finding an existing nonprofit agency to serve as an umbrella for the project so it will be 100% nonprofit.  Although I'm heading out of the states to South America for a while I'll still be working on the project.  I hope you can assist me as we allow the project to grow into a beneficial tool for others.  I'm looking for someone who has connections with a Publisher, someone who can do great graphic design work, a webmaster, and people willing to help with marketing, promotion and other things.  I'll keep you updated as to how the project is going as new things develop.  Thank you to everyone who has shown interest in the project and is helping already.

Currently we are looking for funding for the 10 minute short film, which we will use to solicit grants for the feature length documentary and for promotion of the project.  I hope to have the short completed by the end of the summer.

Blessings to everyone of health, happiness, and freedom.