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Author Topic: risk assesment HELP!  (Read 13950 times)

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Offline helpscared

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risk assesment HELP!
« on: April 08, 2009, 10:12:44 pm »
hi everyone.
long story short i am a curious male, who engaged in oral sex (both giving and recieving - 69) for about 20 minutes.
i tasted pre cum, but he did not ejaculate in my mouth.
i am not sure of his status, he won't answer my e-mail after i asked him his status, calls either .

how much of a risk am i for contracting HIV? (assuming he is positive)
I am very very scared...

Offline RapidRod

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #1 on: April 09, 2009, 05:33:56 am »
Zero.

Offline helpscared

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #2 on: April 09, 2009, 09:05:39 am »
thank you for responding.

i'm kind of confused, would you help clarify why its zero risk?
on the CDC website they said that there is chances of infection through oral.
I did have a small open area in my mouth (gums) and that's what scared me.

i would really appreciate it if you could be more clear as to why its no risk, and help put my mind at ease.

thanks in advance.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #3 on: April 09, 2009, 09:13:39 am »
The mouth is an inhospitable place for HIV to take place. Saliva contains over a dozen different enzymes and proteins that inhibit HIV transmission. Search the forum for oral sex and read all the replies that have been given.

Offline helpscared

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #4 on: May 02, 2009, 11:49:54 am »
thanks again for your response.
i have been reading replies, and i actually just read the infection lesson in the welcome thread.
it was a little confusing.
the part that confused me is that it said the only reported cases of hiv transmission through oral were of men giving oral sex to other men.

i don't mean to post excessively but can you assure me one last time that it is absolutely no risk??
if i do not test over this situation am i putting myself and others at risk (current/future relationships)?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #5 on: May 02, 2009, 12:13:07 pm »
It's not a risk period.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #6 on: May 02, 2009, 12:40:03 pm »
Despite the occasional report of transmission through giving oral to a guy, those reports never seem to hold up under careful scientific scrutiny.

Common sense does dictate that if you have a freshly gaping wound in your mouth or very bad oral care, then giving oral is probably not a good idea. However, your saliva has over a dozen elements and proteins which are very effective in preventing the transmission of viable HIV.

Within the above limits I don't see any cause for concern about giving oral and absolutely none for receiving oral.
Andy Velez

Offline helpscared

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #7 on: May 02, 2009, 08:42:42 pm »
hi andy and rod,

thanks, i'm a little paranoid, but i think that you must get that a lot.
I'm just worried because he was not someone i know.

When you say very bad oral care.. i have mild gingivitis according to my dentist.. is that a cause for concern?
if i don't test is that putting myself or someone else at risk?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #8 on: May 03, 2009, 02:45:31 am »
The simple answer is NO.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #9 on: May 03, 2009, 08:52:57 am »
You are worrying needlessly. Get on with your life. Really.
Andy Velez

Offline helpscared

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #10 on: May 06, 2009, 10:13:57 am »
Thanks guys.
I'm trying, ONE MORE question.

My throat was not at 100% health, its red and mildly enflamed, and was during the encounter
 am i more suseptible? (The doctor said it could be damaged due to acid reflux)
Would HIV be easier to contract through this way, making it more risky?

I just need one final aspect of this reassured, and i promise i will do my best to move on.
Thanks to all of you

Offline RapidRod

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #11 on: May 06, 2009, 10:50:29 am »
No it would not matter.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #12 on: May 06, 2009, 11:41:58 am »
I agree with Rod. Your sore throat did not put you at greater risk.

Take a breath and get on with your life.
Andy Velez

Offline helpscared

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #13 on: June 07, 2009, 01:33:57 am »
hey guys..
so i hate to be back here, i had another encounter with a male.. i'm NOT here to ask about oral risks

what happened was:
we exchanged oral... he then asked if i wanted to try receptive anal, and he wouldn't take no for an aswer. i was really scared and uneasy, but i agreed (he was like twice my size, and scared me) and i made it 100% clear that i wouldn't do it without a condom.
he got a new package opened it infront of me, but when he went to put it on he touched it to his penis head the wrong way, flipped it over and put it on, then tried to insert it.. it went like barely inside and he just left it partially in because it hurt me. then i said it hurt way to much to continue and had to literally force him to stop which was terrifying.. he pinned me down

i'm distressed now, mainly because it was forced and i feel both ashamed and violated, but also because of my phobia of HIV.


am i at risk for HIV if pre cum got onto the exterior of the condom before he inserted it?


is it a risk? or do you think i am just emotionally frazzled from all this and not thinking clear..

Offline HIVworker

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #14 on: June 07, 2009, 03:34:57 am »
I am sorry that he forced himself on you like that. You can do something about that if you wish.

As for a risk of HIV, the answer is no. You probably do have a phobia about HIV but a brief touch of his penis like that wouldn't be enough to give you HIV. The HIV would be in his semen and not just on his penis. So I wouldn't worry that you got HIV from this encounter.

I would concentrate on how you get into situations like that. Not least as you worry about HIV. You did the right thing with the condom. So no - no reason to worry here.

R
NB. Any advice about HIV is given in addition to your own medical advice and not intended to replace it. You should never make clinical decisions based on what anyone says on the internet but rather check with your ID doctor first. Discussions from the internet are just that - Discussions. They may give you food for thought, but they should not direct you to do anything but fuel discussion.

Offline Ann

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #15 on: June 07, 2009, 04:19:22 am »
Help,

As Worker said, you were not at risk if some of his cum got onto the exterior of the condom before he inserted it. We see this particular scenario here all the time and no one has ever ended up hiv positive because of it. You won't either.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline helpscared

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #16 on: June 07, 2009, 12:07:16 pm »
Thnk you worker and ann for responding

worker: i know that the skin of his penis carries no HIV, it was the pre-cum on the penis head that i am worried about... and as for doing something about him forcing it on me.. i couldn't...... i would be way to embarrased to ever even try and approach someone with what happened.. the beauty of online posting is no one even knows you.

ann: i can trust that you know your stuff in this matter, but is there any info you can offer as to why it couldn't cause infection? bear with me i know you get a lot of people who can't let things go, i just want to be really sure.. i terrified myself all last night with the possibilities

Offline Ann

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #17 on: June 08, 2009, 06:05:44 am »
help,

It's because hiv is a very fragile virus. Once it's outside the human body, small changes in temperature, pH and moisture levels quickly damage the virus and render it unable to infect.

You weren't at risk.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline HIVworker

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #18 on: June 11, 2009, 01:31:51 am »
A problem here helpscared is that you are concentrating on a very very silly possibility that you got HIV from a brief encounter. For complete unprotected sex where a HIV positive man ejaculates semen into someone, the chance of getting HIV from the encounter is still not 100%. It's actually in the single digits or lower.

Your proposed risk is thousands of times lower than that. In fact, in viral terms - given that your assumption that they were infected - it is akin to a direct meteorite strike on your house. Your assumption of him being HIV positive is also wrong - you don't actually know.

So you have two choices.

1) Stop worrying about a noting incident and move on with your life.
2) Take out meteorite coverage on your house
NB. Any advice about HIV is given in addition to your own medical advice and not intended to replace it. You should never make clinical decisions based on what anyone says on the internet but rather check with your ID doctor first. Discussions from the internet are just that - Discussions. They may give you food for thought, but they should not direct you to do anything but fuel discussion.

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #19 on: June 11, 2009, 06:10:17 am »

Your assumption of him being HIV positive is also wrong - you don't actually know.


Actually, we always encourage everyone to assume that their sexual partners are hiv positive - and protect yourself accordingly by using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently. Do this and you will remain hiv negative. It really is that simple. Read through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use them with confidence.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline helpscared

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #20 on: June 12, 2009, 11:26:54 pm »
thanks both of you for getting back to me

although the fact that its as likely as a meteor hitting, i am still freaked out a bit... i called the sexual health hotline in my area and at first he said the same as you guys... then within 2 minutes told me he couldn't say not to worry about something liek this..
do you think thats just because he was obligated to for legal reasons?

also, i had hemroids about 2 week or so before which i thought had cleared up [medicated] but since the encounter i have had some minor bleeding[on a daily basis] when going to the washroom

would this pose more of a risk..  its apparent that there was some tearing of the anal cavitity.. like i said he forced it and it was my first time

also do andy or rod have any input?

Offline Ann

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #21 on: June 13, 2009, 04:00:26 am »
Help,

Re-read your entire thread because our answers are not going to change with your additional details.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline helpscared

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risk?
« Reply #22 on: May 16, 2010, 04:23:25 am »
hi andy ann, and RR
i've been here before and you served me well.
just a quick question.

i performed/recieved oral on another male. i understand thats not the risk. BUT what i am concerned about is that he was also performing oral on my anal area, but he kept touching his penis and then touching/rubbing my anus, and a few brief moments he tried to slightly insert a finger. is it a risk if there was precum on his fingers while he was doing this?
the reson i am scared is because after i noticed he had large purple marks on his stomach which were not bruises.. and when i googled it it lookied very very similar to kaposis sarcoma..

thanks, hope to hear from you

Offline RapidRod

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Re: risk?
« Reply #23 on: May 16, 2010, 04:31:25 am »
   Please do not start a new thread every time you have another question or thought - regardless if you think your questions are related to each other or not. It helps us to help you when you keep all your thoughts or questions in one thread and it helps other readers to follow the discussion. Additional threads will be merged.


   If you cannot find your thread, click on the "Show own posts" link in the left-hand column of any forum page, under your name.

Offline helpscared

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Re: risk?
« Reply #24 on: May 16, 2010, 04:39:22 am »
oh shoot sorry.
i didn't realize i could do that.
well since i've already started a new thread is it possible for you to answer my question?
.... or do you want me to ask again under the old post?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: risk?
« Reply #25 on: May 16, 2010, 04:40:41 am »
No. You questions won't get answered until you return to your original thread.

Offline helpscared

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #26 on: May 16, 2010, 04:43:45 am »
hi andy ann, and RR
i've been here before and you served me well.
just a quick question.

i performed/recieved oral on another male. i understand thats not the risk. BUT what i am concerned about is that he was also performing oral on my anal area, but he kept touching his penis and then touching/rubbing my anus, and a few brief moments he tried to slightly insert a finger. is it a risk if there was precum on his fingers while he was doing this?
the reson i am scared is because after i noticed he had large purple marks on his stomach which were not bruises.. and when i googled it it lookied very very similar to kaposis sarcoma..

thanks, hope to hear from you

Offline RapidRod

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #27 on: May 16, 2010, 04:47:36 am »
Rimming is not a risk of contracting HIV and HIV is not transmitted outside its host so having your anus rubbed after he touched his penis is not a risk.

Offline helpscared

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #28 on: May 16, 2010, 04:50:02 am »
thank you very much.
does that include if his finger enetered my anus?
my last question i swear.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #29 on: May 16, 2010, 04:52:07 am »
That includes inserting his finger in your ass.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #30 on: May 16, 2010, 07:47:01 am »
I've merged your threads. In the future please keep all of your entries in this same thread. Thanks for your cooperation.

And  your latest concern about fingers inserted in your butt is as Rod has told you, not a risk. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline helpscared

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #31 on: December 17, 2010, 02:50:48 pm »
hello andy ann and rod
here with a couple questions.

i have 2 situations i am worried about...
one - while my sexual partner was cuming.. he shot up into my face.. is there a chance of ocular infection this way?

second.. seperate occassion, my jacked himself off, and after coming tried to finger my ass.. i don't have anal sex so it was tight and his nail made a little cut.. not sure how much cum was on his fingers

am i at risk for these?
the status is unknown

Offline RapidRod

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #32 on: December 17, 2010, 02:53:07 pm »
HIV is unable to reproduce outside its living host (unlike many bacteria or fungi, which may do so under suitable conditions), except under laboratory conditions, therefore, it does not spread or maintain infectiousness outside its host.

Offline Ann

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #33 on: December 17, 2010, 03:02:26 pm »
Help,

In addition to what Rodney said, hiv is a very fragile virus that is primarily transmitted INSIDE the human body, as in unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse where the virus never leaves the confines of the two bodies.

Once outside the body, small changes in temperature, and pH and moisture levels all quickly damage the virus and render it unable to infect.

You had no risk in either situation.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. IT REALLY IS THAT SIMPLE!!!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline helpscared

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #34 on: December 17, 2010, 03:07:49 pm »
thank you rod very much
is it insantly killed? because it wasn't outside the body for very long before contact with me.. especially the eye

Offline helpscared

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #35 on: December 17, 2010, 03:11:13 pm »
thank you ann
would you be able to answer the same question i just asked rod?

i was just wondering how long it generally has to be outside the body?

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: risk assesment HELP!
« Reply #36 on: December 17, 2010, 03:31:30 pm »
You are worrying needlessly. It virtually instantly loses viability once outside of the body. There is REALLY no need for further concern. Quit bothering yourself about this.
Andy Velez

 


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