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Author Topic: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?  (Read 66623 times)

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Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: I think I am back for the wrong reason
« Reply #50 on: August 08, 2006, 12:04:05 pm »
was not bleeding when i checked after...don't know if it bled exactly when it happened in her mouth until climax.  Does it matter?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I think I am back for the wrong reason
« Reply #51 on: August 08, 2006, 12:09:31 pm »
Let's put this to rest. If she didn't bite your penis off, you don't have a damn thing to worry about.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: I think I am back for the wrong reason
« Reply #52 on: August 08, 2006, 12:10:55 pm »
thanks Rapid for your patience.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: I think I am back for the wrong reason
« Reply #53 on: August 08, 2006, 01:09:32 pm »
I meant to say:

thanks guys......sorry for reiteration after reiteration...........and Rapid i guess rupture means severe cut.......i had skin on the head of my penis peeled off roughly by her teeth while she was giving me a blowjob......and i still continued with the blowjob to climax because i didn't feel a pain AFTER THE INITIAL PAIN OF HITTING MY PENIS HEAD HARD INTO HER TEETH ( I vividly remember that that hurt....but i continued getting the blowjob because the pain was no more.  But after climax i saw this mark and to best describe it I used words that fueled my horror. 

just wanted to get across exactly what i wanted to say.





Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: I think I am back for the wrong reason
« Reply #54 on: August 09, 2006, 02:40:55 pm »
I think I did pretty good so far.....trying to put my fears to rest....trying being the operative word.  Andy, Ann, Morgan, Jkin, and Rapid can you please give me a final stamp of no testing over getting rough oral (with a teeth bite on the head of my penis during and all the way until climax), getting rimmed deep, and getting fingered in the anus deep?

You can hate me if you want, but please just tell me what you experts have to say.

thanks

Offline Ann

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Re: I think I am back for the wrong reason
« Reply #55 on: August 09, 2006, 02:47:33 pm »
Really,

You did NOT have a risk of hiv infection in anything you have brought to this website.

This has gone on long enough. Read the posting guidelines in the Welcome thread and pay particular attention to the one about being given a time out. Please consider yourself officially warned.

You did not have a risk.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I think I am back for the wrong reason
« Reply #56 on: August 09, 2006, 02:52:40 pm »
55 replies in your post and you want us to repeat ourselves? Now come on, we've all told you from the start that you weren't at risk. If you were doing better you wouldn't have asked again. Instead of using the forum for your chat line seek the help of a mental health professional to get over your unwarranted fears.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: I think I am back for the wrong reason
« Reply #57 on: August 09, 2006, 03:02:39 pm »
sorry Ann and thanks for your reply.  Rapid my apologies.  I think I have to stay away and get a grip. 

thanks for all your help and time.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: I think I am back for the wrong reason
« Reply #58 on: August 15, 2006, 01:43:48 pm »
I know this is going to sound a bit silly........but as i do not remember much from the time i received the rimming, digital-anal, and oral......then i went to sleep.....in the morning again had oral, digital-anal, and rimming and then ejaculated.  Is it possible while i was passed out, the sex worker had vaginal sex with my penis??  Is this possible or would i definitely know regardless how drunk i was that we were having vaginal sex unprotected?

sorry if it sounds stupid, but I think I have let go of the situation, but now this nagging thing in the back of my head is telling me " you passed out then you woke up, so from the time you passed out and woke up next to the sex worker you don't know what happened"

I would be able to feel unprotected vaginal sex even if i was sleeping right?

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: I think I am back for the wrong reason
« Reply #59 on: August 15, 2006, 01:52:21 pm »
Um, looking THAT hard for an HIV risk in your situation is worth discussing with a professional therapist.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: I think I am back for the wrong reason
« Reply #60 on: August 15, 2006, 01:54:36 pm »
so i guess it is silly.......i would be able to feel it and know right?

Offline Ann

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Re: I think I am back for the wrong reason
« Reply #61 on: August 15, 2006, 01:57:21 pm »
really,

If you cannot bring yourself to believe that you had no risk, why don't you just go test, receive your negative results and move on? As a sexually active adult you should be getting tested once or twice a year anyway, purely as a matter of routine.

Drunken, passed out men do not get erections capable of intercourse.

You are still under a time-out warning.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #62 on: September 14, 2006, 01:40:47 pm »
 woke up in the morning and had a cup of coffee which was served by a local houseworker and midway from finishing the coffee I saw blood on the side of the  cup.  It was a big red mark which I directly drank over.  I ran to the bathroom to see if it was my blood from my lips that made this mark on the cup, but there was no blood coming from my lips except chapped lips (dry).  I took the cup and put it under water and the blood immediately diluted with the water and washed away, so I know it was fresh blood, and im worried that if this was HIV positive blood could I have gotten infected with the HIV virus?  Although i didn't see blood coming from my lips, there are cuts (slits) due to severely chapped lips.  Is this a cause for concern of getting HIV?
thanks

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #63 on: September 14, 2006, 04:23:16 pm »
Why have you started a new thread? After 34 posts you should know the rules by now. Please read the Welcome Thread.

MtD

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #64 on: September 14, 2006, 06:05:39 pm »
If you have another question put it into your original thread. I am locking this one. Please don't start a thread everytime you have what you think is a new thought/problem.
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #65 on: September 14, 2006, 07:12:09 pm »
Really,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

But you know what? I think you were just trying to fool me into forgetting that you are under a time out warning. Didn't work. I remember very well.

You've been around this forum for long enough by now to know that this alleged blood on cup (probably lipstick) thing is in no way a risk of hiv infection. If you persue this matter, with even just one post, you WILL be given a time out.

Go get the face to face help with a counselor or therapist that you need. We cannot help you any further. No kidding.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #66 on: September 15, 2006, 10:20:38 am »
Ann it was not lipstick, it was blood.  I know that 100%

Offline RapidRod

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #67 on: September 15, 2006, 10:24:57 am »
It doesn't matter if it was blood. You had no risk what so ever.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #68 on: September 15, 2006, 10:34:21 am »
thanks Rapid for your response.  I really appreciate it.

so even if the blood was on the cup and then i drank over it......with maybe cuts on my lips due to dry lips....still not a problem?  Is it because HIV virus is inactive as soon as it leave someone's body? we're talking a few seconds here right?  In order for me to be infected this way....the person who spilled the blood on the cup would have to spill the blood directly on to my lips (where there are cuts due to severely chapped lips)....correct?  If the blood was spilled on the cup and by the time i drank it.....maybe a couple seconds to a minute.......the virus would already be inactive right?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #69 on: September 15, 2006, 10:56:21 am »
You've been here long enough that you do not get HIV from environmental surfaces.

Offline Ann

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #70 on: September 15, 2006, 11:11:37 am »
really,

You must not have believed me when I said one more post over this blood on a cup thing and you'd be given a time out.

I'm giving you a four week time out to encourage you to address your ever widening circle of hiv anxiety in the correct setting - face to face with a counselor or therapist. There's nothing more we can do for you here.

Do not create a new account to get around your time out because if you do, I will know and you will be permanently banned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #71 on: February 05, 2007, 03:50:33 am »
Hello Andy, Rapid, Ann, Jkin, and everyone,

hope you guys can help me out with your advice.  This past friday night i had a lot to drink and i brought a sex worker home.  I had unprotected oral (i was insertive), unprotected rimming (i was receiving), and protected vaginal sex.  With the protected vaginal sex:  I used the first condom (mekako condom), it felt like it was latex and i put it on and started penetrating, after 10 or 15 minutes I withdrew and went to go get something from the car.  When I took to condom out i did not take a good look at it to see if tore or broke.  And trust me I would not be able to feel this breakage given how hammered i was (drunk).  But when i took the condom off it easily rolled off from the base to the tip of my penis.  Does this mean that the condom did not tear?  I disposed of the condom right away in the toilet and flushed it down that is why i could not look at it later to find out if it tore or not.

When i got back from the car, i put on another condom called kama sutra condom.  On this condom packet it's clearly marked latex condom but when i put it on it was not one distinctive color......it was on color and then horizontal lines of the same color but in a darker form.  I used this condom till climax and later i checked it and it seemed there were no tears or breakage.

Was I at risk for HIV? Do i need to test?  This sex worker i know has been around for many years and people have told me she is HIV+, because of alcohol i did such a stupid thing......i feel like my time has ran out.

Also on the link below, it says male condoms are only 80% - 95% effective in reducing the risk of HIV infection??  Is that true??  Why is there so much mismatched information out there???  Who to believe?

http://www.amfar.org/binary-data/AMFAR_PPOLICY_BINARY/binary_file/11.pdf



thanks for listening everyone, your advice and opinions are much appreciated.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #72 on: February 05, 2007, 04:02:51 am »
Condoms are 100% effective when used consistantly, correctly and with plenty of lube. Sex and alcohol abusing don't mix. It does not matter what color the comdom was. There will be doubt in your mind if a condom would have failed. Since your condom didn't you were never at risk for HIV.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #73 on: February 05, 2007, 04:10:55 am »
Thanks Rapid.  But i did not use any lube, and it was kind of rough sex.  I am pretty sure i would NOT notice if the condom failed.  But by the fact that when i took the first condom off, because if rolled off easily......can i take that to mean that the condom was intact and did NOT fail?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #74 on: February 05, 2007, 04:16:50 am »
I don't care how drunk you were. If the condom would have failed you would have known it.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #75 on: February 05, 2007, 04:58:35 am »
Rapid i was really hammered, i sincerely doubt i would have noticed if the condom broke.  But can you tell me if the condom broke, tore, etc., would it be easy after to 'roll off' the shaft of the penis then? 
also i am assuming that receiving a blowjob and rimming constitues nil risk right?

There is no need for testing right.  I recently got a HIV in December and came out negative.  I am planning to get a  yearly test around that time.  Do I need to test for this incident in 3 months?  Please guys your honest opinion.  And Rapid on one of the post it says that a torn or broke condom looks like a hula dress??? what is that??  If i was easily able to 'roll off' the condom after, is that a very good sign the condom was intact throughout intercourse?
thanks

Offline RapidRod

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #76 on: February 05, 2007, 05:15:50 am »
You don't need a test. It does sound like you need to work on your drinking problem though.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #77 on: February 05, 2007, 05:31:12 am »
You are definitely right Rapid.  It's the alchohol that pushes me to do things i would never dare do sober.  I know what's done is done now and there is now way to fix it.  I just need someone to tell me how a broken condom looks like and if a condom breaks during intercourse, is that condom easily removable from the penis or it requires 'two hands' to get the condom off (if it's broken).
thanks, sorry for lingering on the same question but their is no response to that.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #78 on: February 05, 2007, 06:06:41 am »
Do you know what a hula skirt looks like? Is it hard to get a failed condom off? No not at all.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #79 on: February 05, 2007, 06:20:02 am »
thanks Rapid.

I am just worried now that the first condom i took off, may have been a broken condom.  I vividly remember taking of that condom with ease with just one hand.  I took or slid off the condom from the base to the tip and it came out very easy.  Rapid how can i know if it was broken or not?  You know when under the influence of alcohol, you hardly feel anything hence the long intercourse time.  Not too mention i drank a lot of whiskey.  Is there a way you can help me provide a reason that that condom did not break???  and a hula is a dress make out of a specific plant and look like an umbrella right? sorry Rapid, just trying to get to the bottom of this because i really don't remember much about that condom except when i took it off and how easy it was.



Offline RapidRod

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #80 on: February 05, 2007, 06:25:29 am »
Really, we can't guess for you. Take a test at 13 weeks and get your results. That will put an end of it. I would suggest you seek help with your drinking or don't have sex when you're highly inebriated and can not remember. Your asking for trouble with that combination.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #81 on: February 05, 2007, 06:43:51 am »
Yes you are definetly right about the alchohol Rapid.  No matter how many times i say never again, again always comes knocking.  Rapid and all other experts, if a condom tore or broke during intercourse, and you then proceeded to remove the condom-------> how would that condom look like?? What i mean is how would it look like broken?  And even if it is easy to remove also when broken, how does the condom look when removing???
Sorry Rapid, waiting again another 13 weeks for a final confirmation is like hell.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #82 on: February 05, 2007, 06:51:21 am »
Well when you don't use a condom correctly, those are the terms you have to deal with. I just told you what a condom looks like when it fails. You won't have a problem knowing that it has failed, even with the lights off and pitch black in the room. But then you were excessively drunk and you don't remember, isn't that what you stated? So at this point is doesn't matter, just test.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #83 on: February 05, 2007, 07:04:16 am »
Rapid what did you mean when you said

" Well when you don't use a condom correctly, those are the terms you have to deal with."

I did not use lube that's for sure......I just tore the wrapper and put the condom on and straight to intercourse.

I am a bit confused because when i took the condom off it looked normal in the sense that i saw no hula skirt.  It look like a normal condom from the base down as i was dangling it from one hand while walking to the toilet to dispose it.

Rapid i know you are straight to the point, which great for people with their what if's.  But seriously man, if a condom broke and you took it off with one hand and walked it over to the toilet which about a couple meters away.....would you notice a hula skirt? would you notice anything abnormal? 

Offline RapidRod

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #84 on: February 05, 2007, 07:07:52 am »
If the condom would have failed. Yes you would have noticed. There is no mistaking a condom failure.

Offline Ann

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #85 on: February 05, 2007, 07:23:09 am »
really,

I deleted the other thread you started. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

You would have noticed if the condom broke.

Lube is more important when engaging in anal intercourse, as the anus/rectum does not have much of its own lube. You should have read through the condom and lube links in my signature line by now - if you haven't, get reading.

You do not need to test over this incident. Just make sure you have at least one full sexual health care check up a year - more if you're very active - and you'll be just fine as long as you make sure you use condoms, every time, no exceptions. It doesn't matter who you are with, a sex worker or the girl next door, condoms will protect you.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #86 on: February 05, 2007, 07:26:19 am »
Thanks Rapid.  I am reading the correct ways of putting on a condom........I did not do any of the stuff it says to do, hold the tip tight to let all air escape....make sure the condom is the right way not the opposite.

I honestly didn't do any of this, all i did was take it out from the wrapper and put it on and rolled it to the base of my penis shaft.  
I guess the main point here is it didn't break.....even if put the condom on incorrectly, as long as it didn't break it did it's job right?

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #87 on: February 05, 2007, 07:50:34 am »
Thanks for your reply Ann.
Could you comment on my last post, can anyone??

thanks in advance

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #88 on: February 05, 2007, 08:03:08 am »
The main thing is for the head of your penis to be covered during intercourse. Which it was from what you have described.

Seven months into your coming to this site you are still caught up in details that unnecessarily feed your fears.

When a condom fails it's not a subtle event. It falls apart. That's what Rod means when he refers to a "hula skirt." Clearly that did NOT happen with you.

As long as you use condoms consistently you're covered literally and figuratively as far as HIV is concerned. And that includes even if your partner is HIV+. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #89 on: February 05, 2007, 08:13:06 am »
Thanks for the reply Andy.  Thanks Rapid and Ann too, all your advice is so much appreciated.

Offline Ann

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #90 on: February 05, 2007, 08:14:10 am »
really,

Incorrectly used condoms don't always break. Yours didn't. You were protected.

You might want to think about buying a few condoms to practice with. Putting one on will become second nature in no time - it's easy to do. Learn how to do it and learn how to do it in the dark as well. If you continue to use them incorrectly, you might have one break on you at some time in the future.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #91 on: February 07, 2007, 02:08:30 am »
Ann thanks.  Last night i was thinking about this......Ann could you tell me if it is possible that the condom did not break but had a hole in it? maybe at the tip?  Is this possible?  Because i read in one of the posts that a person found a  hole in his condom, and his condom did not break during intercourse.  He found the hole after intercourse had taken place. 
What are the chances that the condom i used had a hole on the tip?

sorry for going on and on......i was thinking about it last night and i knew who to ask this question too.

thanks in advance

Offline RapidRod

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #92 on: February 07, 2007, 03:52:03 am »
You are not going to have a hole in a condom. You will find a tear like a split banana or shredded.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #93 on: February 07, 2007, 03:56:51 am »
thanks Rapid.  So according to you, I was protected with that encounter?
No need to worry?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #94 on: February 07, 2007, 04:03:22 am »
That's not what I'm saying. You said you were drunk and you don't remember. I advised you to go ahead and test. This isn't  a guessing game.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #95 on: February 07, 2007, 04:10:17 am »
I understand that fully Rapid.  But I remember when i took off the condom and it looked normal looking when i disposed of it in the toilet.  With that said could you say i was protected?
Therefore no need to worry or test?  You know how things come back to you after a drunk night, and I remember things more cleary and that condom didn't look like a split banana.........how would it look shredded?
From what i remember when disposing the condom in the toilet, it look like a regular looking condom.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #96 on: February 07, 2007, 04:22:05 am »
If you had no doubt about it, you won't be concerned to be here posting in the first place.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #97 on: February 07, 2007, 04:27:01 am »
Rapid level with me.  I understand what you are saying, I do not have a doubt now except that maybe there could have been a hole on the condom on the tip.  You are telling me that is impossible, it would have to tear and look like a banana peeled or shredded.......it didn't.  So what is the conclusion...pls tell me.

thanks in advance Rapid.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #98 on: February 07, 2007, 04:37:22 am »
Read the relpies that you have already been given.

Offline reallyextremlyworried

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Re: please tell me if this is an HIV concern?
« Reply #99 on: February 07, 2007, 04:41:13 am »
thanks Rapid.

 


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