POZ Community Forums
HIV Prevention and Testing => Do I Have HIV? => Topic started by: lax_what on June 24, 2014, 06:17:54 am
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im a gay male living in a country where homosexuality is NOT accepted. In December 2012, when i was 16 i engaged in an unprotected oral sex ( both ways ) with another bisexual male(he's married and have a child now) i met online. I didnt suck his penis for more than a min because i hated the taste. He then sucked me off and i came in his mouth.
In 2013, there were a few times when i involved myself in the same agenda with the same guy for a couple of times ( cant remember but less than 5 throughout the year ) and it was all ONLY unprotected oral sex.
On 2nd January 2014, i met him again and we had a quickie in a public toilet where i sucked him off and i tasted his pre cum. He DIDN'T ejaculate inside my mouth.
In February 2014, we met and he did frottage to me with a few attempts to penetrate me but I PUSHED HIM AWAY. He didnt penetrate me.
In April 2014, i met with another guy and we had PROTECTED anal sex. The condom stayed intact throughout and he ejaculated inside the condom OUTSIDE my anus. After he pulled out i did feel something came out from my anus and im pretty sure its not his cum maybe it is just my ass juice or the lube that we used since he cummed outside my hole into the condom.
7 days ago ( 16th June ) i had a PROTECTED anal sex again with the guy i first met in 2012 using DUREX EXTRA SAFE condom and KY jelly lube. it didnt hurt and the condom stayed intact throughout. After that i saw the cum filled at the tip of the condom and we went to the sink and filled it with water to inspect for leakage or holes or whatever but thankfully it was in good condition ( the cum didnt leak out the condom and there was no hole or leakage) .
Now what really concern me is that i kept on asking two of the guys about their status and they said they're clean. One of them actually got upset with me and went all mad because i some sort of looked down on him and he told me that he's married in Oct 2012. In my country in order to get married it is compulsory to get tested for HIV before getting married.
Im really scared right now as i cant sleep well. I know what i did was wrong and somehow i know i'll get hiv as a punishment from god. Sometimes i feel suicidal because this is too much. Please tell me i'll be fine . In may 2014, i went for a RAPID HIV TEST ( finger prick test ) and it came out negative. im still worried please help me
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Lax,
To refer to someone's negative hiv status as "clean" is to imply that those of us who are hiv positive are "dirty". It's insulting, so do not use that word in that way here again.
Hiv is NOT a punishment from god. It's just a virus that ANY human being can get - you don't have to be a gay man.
You haven't done anything wrong. In fact, you did the right thing and used condoms for anal intercourse. That's all you need to do. As for oral sex, it's not an hiv risk unless you have absolutely terrible oral health.
There have been three long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one.
Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:
You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.
To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.
Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.
Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.
If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.
Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!
Ann
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Ann,
thank you for your reply. Im sorry i used the term "clean" didnt mean to offend anyone. Will not do it again . Regarding oral sex, am i not at risk? i mean i tasted his precum and i quickly swallowed. I read somewhere that pre cum doesnt contain enough HIV to be infectious esp if its in the mouth since our saliva have some sort of ability to absorb and their very very short time of exposure bfore swallowed.
is latex a good barrier for hiv ?
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Your saliva has over a dozen elements and proteins which very effectively prevent the transmission of viable HIV. The only confirmed risks for the sexual transmission of HIV are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. Those are the activities for which you need to always without exception use condom. They provide very effective protection.
At this point you are worrying needlessly about HIV and I don't see any need for testing.
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but i read somewhere about a guy who believed he got infected only through oral sex. im worried help
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but i read somewhere about a guy who believed he got infected only through oral sex. im worried help
As Andy frequently points outs ... Fears are not facts . You never had a risk and can move on from this fear .