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Main Forums => Living With HIV => Topic started by: Okealyshire on May 08, 2008, 02:33:23 am

Title: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Okealyshire on May 08, 2008, 02:33:23 am
Summer 2002: it was during a consulting gig, working with a customer on a network redesign. Got the phone call from the clinic while in the middle of a challenging whiteboard discussion with their recalcitrant network engineering dude. Stood motionless for a moment as the adrenaline surged through my veins, immediately forgetting the point I was trying to make. Then went back to work, brushing off his "Hey, are you ok?" question with a comment I can't even remember now.

Yours?

(c'mon, let's get a nice long thread going :))
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: ga1964 on May 08, 2008, 02:59:59 am
Dec. 2006, the day before going into surgery.  My doctor (the ER doctor on duty the night I went to the hospital) came in my room and said "The test came back Positive...good luck in surgery...I'll see you tomorrow." (so much for a bedside manner.)

I had the hole night to dwell on the news, not that having surgery the next day hadn't already been wearing on my mind for the last 2 weeks, that I had been laying in the hospital trying to get well enough to have the surgery.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Matty the Damned on May 08, 2008, 03:08:42 am
May 3rd, 2002 at 8:33 pm. Standing in my kitchen when my GP rang with the news.

MtD
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: lucas clay on May 08, 2008, 03:43:24 am
While having my sons open house for his graduation.
 I got the call my best friend was in the hospital, and things were not looking good for her.
I never got to see her again


                                      ( i miss her sooooo much) :'(
                                                            Lucas
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Dragonette on May 08, 2008, 03:57:42 am
In a parked car, by the beach, while visiting my parents over Christmas, around 12.30 on the 27.12.05, beautiful sunny day. I had the test that morning and i called them to find the result, the doctor told me to come over for a second test. He didn't say what it meant but I knew immediately. Everything became really amplified, it was the biggest (and worst) adrenaline rush I ever had.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: heartforyou on May 08, 2008, 04:21:06 am
Somewhere in July 1987.
I was at home and was waiting for billirubine test results to come in.
My GP called and said : Herman, your liver is fine. But you got that "new" disease. AIDS.
I cried for half an hour, stood up and left for my flight.

Hermie
who will always remember
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: tendai on May 08, 2008, 05:07:46 am
April 5 2005. i went to a voluntary testing and counselling centre. there was a delay in giving me my results unlike the previous times i'd been there but i was sure i was negative.  so when the lady said "u tested postive" i just kind of went numb. she couldnt look me in the face. i went back to the office and cried in the store room.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: anniebc on May 08, 2008, 05:18:12 am
April 5th 2002 in a hospital bed, having been admitted while going through a two week severe seroconvertion.

Jan
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: BT65 on May 08, 2008, 07:32:50 am
February 12, 1989, in a drug treatment center.  A counselor pulled me out of group to tell me.  Then three days later, the same counselor pulled me out of group again to inform me my (1st) husband died.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: rondrond on May 08, 2008, 08:12:48 am
on my birthday, 1mar93....in the Tarrant County Public Health Depratment, which is on University Drive, in the middle of the Arts Cultural District. Botanical Gardens. ..In Fort Worth, 1993,  it seems, they don't tell you nothing on the phone. You go in, they take you to a small room, there are two people waiting outside the room to intercept you i, in case you run, as they have another room you are escorted to immediately for counseling and grieving and your options and ..your next step.  After leaving, I drove through the Botanical Gardens soaking up al the 'life' around me and while in the middle of the Rose gardens, I called my Mom.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: woodshere on May 08, 2008, 08:13:23 am
March 7, 2006 @ 4:37pm  I was sitting at my desk at work and the doctor called.  He said he had some good news and some bad news.  And as they say, "The rest is history".
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: thunter34 on May 08, 2008, 08:34:19 am
AID Atlanta, December, 2004.  Few enough?
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Dachshund on May 08, 2008, 08:41:09 am
Seems the health department in Memphis didn't take too kindly to me ignoring their letters asking me to return for my test results. They called one day and said if I didn't come in the Shelby County Sheriff's Department would be providing me transportation. That kind of gave it away, that and the night sweats.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Peter Staley on May 08, 2008, 08:41:19 am
Like woodshere, I was at my desk at work.  It was on a Friday -- November 15th, 1985 -- and scientists had only isolated (discovered) the HIV virus less than one year earlier.  I was a bond trader at JP Morgan on Wall Street, and my doctor's office called me.  The male nurse asked me to come back in for "more tests, because one of your lab results is off" (I had visited the office that week to check up on a cough that wouldn't go away, and he ran a CBC).  I pressed him to tell me what their suspicions were, and he said my elevated WBC count could be indicative of an HIV infection.  

Believe it or not, I was scheduled to leave on a one week vacation that night with my new boyfriend visiting from Amsterdam.  I arrived at Disney World later that night.

"So what did you do when you found out you were HIV+?  I WENT TO DISNEY WORLD!"
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: David_CA on May 08, 2008, 08:44:10 am
I was sitting on the sofa in our den in March, 2006.  Hubby was calling for the results of my mail-in test and was on hold for a long time (waiting for a live person instead of a recording).  If your results are negative, you're only on hold for a few minutes, so I knew what that meant - I was HIV+.  We hugged and cried a bit, though I was mostly in shock.  I'm so glad that period of my life is over, however I received a second diagnosis later that year in the hospital - AIDS (and PCP pneumonia).

David
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: allopathicholistic on May 08, 2008, 09:11:07 am
GP's office, March of 2000. Returned to work (worked at Smith Barney) and pretended that "what just happened didn't happen" ... I hear experts say little kids who suffer at the hands of rapists etc also often "block out" traumatic events  :-\ Understand that I had tested 3 times in the 90s while being tres promiscuous and a condom-hater so I thought I was immune to HIV (yet still went and got tested every now and then, hmmmm, that's one for the psychology books I guess). Sorry this is a lot of sentences - Just brings back memories, that's all  :-[
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: sharkdiver on May 08, 2008, 09:15:45 am
It was sometime in May 1985 at the county's public health department. It was 2 weeks before I graduated high school.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: letmebeyourhero on May 08, 2008, 10:25:08 am
At a routine STD screening at the State Health Department center.  I knew there must be trouble when a different person came into the room to give me the results.  I left, and drove to a parking garage where i just sat and took everything in for an hour or so.  One of the scaries, most desperate days of my life.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: danpoz on May 08, 2008, 10:28:13 am
Routine Testing at the local LGBT clinic. The male nurse was an amazingly compassionate person, he just said it and sat there, letting me absorb before trying to provide me with any other info. He eventually gave me tons of stuff but I don't remember a word of it. They give out these black folders with all the info you might need, how about walking out carrying that to show what you've just been told?
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: GSOgymrat on May 08, 2008, 10:30:21 am
In December 1992 at Planned Parenthood my partner and I took the test. His came back positive and mine "indeterminent", which was a big shock because I was prepared for yes or no, not maybe. I waited a couple of weeks, took the test again and came back positive in January 1993.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Assurbanipal on May 08, 2008, 10:44:07 am
May 2006 in the hospital ICU.   I felt little over the drugs and haze but relief to find out what was wrong had a name and could be fought.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Robert on May 08, 2008, 10:58:22 am
Oct. 2, 2003.

I had been running on low for a good 9 months.  This was my 3rd visit to the Dr in the last year and I told her I just wasn't getting any better.  She sent me up to X-Ray and when I got back to her office, they threw me on a gurney and sent me off to the emergency room.  There the Dr came running in to show me the x-rays.   Lungs full of fluids. 
Pneumonia.  "You got AIDS, buddy", he said.    I shrugged.  Fine with me.  Just do whatever, I thought.

3 weeks later they took the tubes out of me and I woke up, surrounded by my brothers and Michael.

robert
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: leatherman on May 08, 2008, 11:50:54 am
Sorry but I need to take a couple extra lines as I'm telling the stories for three people.

In Sept of 1992, my (first) late partner, Randy, had gone through tests to determine if his month-long fever was a re-occurence of Chron's Disease (an intestinal disease) - with no conclusive results. Being influenced by that and the PSAs airing on TV in late 1992, I was tested at the city's health dept. in early December. On Dec 26, 1992, at 2:30pm after verifying my anonymous number, the nurse told me the results. I started AZT monotherapy within 3 months, while my partner (whose HIV results came in the doctor's office in Jan 93) entered clinical trials at the Cleveland Clinic. Eighteen months later after several stays in the hospital, my partner came home with Hospice Care. Nine days later, he passed away on May 25, 1994 at 5:55am (a month and a half before his 30th birthday).

Fourteen years later in Feb 08, my (second) late partner, Jim, had a month-long fever. After some inconclusive blood work, he was admitted to the hospital Mar 3rd. After five grueling days of waiting in the hospital for the results of tests and scans, he received a diagnosis of both AIDS and AIDS-related non-Hodgkins lymphoma. After spending 50 out of 52 days in the hospital, going through the hell of chemotheraphy, numerous tranfusions and treatments, he was unable to endure the illnesses and the treatments and came home with Hospice Care. Eight days later, he passed away on May 1, 2008 at 5:55am (a month and a half before his 52nd birthday).
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: rick21007 on May 08, 2008, 12:58:41 pm
Leatherman, your post took my breath away.    I am so sorry.

rick
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: bleueyes on May 08, 2008, 02:01:34 pm
March 8, 1995, my little sisters thirteenth birthday. I went to a free clinic where my fiance and I both tested. In the room I was told it was positive, this my second test because the first one was inconclusive.
I had always been an awful student, but because of this I had nothing but studies. I dove into school work, while avoiding other students. And for the first time since third grade I started to win awards.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Oceanbeach on May 08, 2008, 02:47:42 pm
1. December, 1994, right after Christmas
2. The Center in Long Beach, normal 6 month test.
3.  Would you like a kleenex?  I do not have a cold.
4.  There is a Support Group on Tuesday night at 8:00 PM
5.  The facilitator quit Tuesday afternoon, no one was there but me
 ;D  Five sentences or less, Have the best day  ;D
Michael
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: rick21007 on May 08, 2008, 04:05:30 pm
December 9, 2006--I was at my office.  A phone call from my (then) MD's office nurse (I swear she was doing her nails when she spoke to me.)  "This is Dr. Visser's office nurse calling with your lab results.    Good News!!Your hep B did not become chronic.  Oh, and you have hiv.  You can call the receptionist and she will schedule your next appointment.  Have a nice day!  Bye."  BTW she was wrong about the Hep B.  Office visit the next week:  Dr. Visser was very professional, even if he did believe this was my punishment from God for being a homosexual.  Then he pretty much sat me down and interrogated me about the details of my sex life--who what when and where.  That office visit was more traumatic than the phone call actually.  I used more than 5 sentences but then some of the other posters didn't use all of their sentences. ;D

rick
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: pozniceguy on May 08, 2008, 04:18:35 pm
Jan 1994..I was admitted to Hospital with pneumonia..took three days to figure out it was PCP  and then two weeks later went and tested for HIV at local clinic...  it was positive.. the counselor was very understanding and asked what I wanted to do  ..gave me a list of support groups / organizations....not really surprised after the PCP result

Nick
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: bocker3 on May 08, 2008, 04:35:45 pm
Aug 24, 2005 - at the only clinic in Richmond that provided a 20 min test.  I came in after weeks of night sweats, and a gi-normous lymph node in my neck.  I was sitting in a pleasant waiting area for my result -- a fish tank with beautiful fish was in front of me when the counselor walked in and said, "Your result is positive."  I still can feel the duplicate feel of dread and relief.  She asked me if I was suicidal, I said no.  I asked if she would be here after 5:00 so that I could bring my partner in to be tested.  She said that normally that is off hours, but she would be in late that night working on a grant application so she would do the test, if he wanted it.  He did and he was negative.

Mike
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: mjmel on May 08, 2008, 05:11:31 pm
Denver, Colorado. In 1989 about two weeks before Christmas.
I realized one day that all my past lovers (4) through the years, and all my close friends were gone.
Figured it was time to test at the local health clinic. After the results were delivered (in person) I braced myself for the oncoming illness. It never came.
Still here. Still relatively healthy. Been so blessed, in that respect.

Mike
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Miss Philicia on May 08, 2008, 05:23:24 pm
1993, Skowhegan School of Painting and Sculpture

www.skowheganart.org
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Snowangel on May 08, 2008, 05:26:17 pm
DPH, Worcester, Mass
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Kellyk on May 08, 2008, 05:49:38 pm
In a bed at Northside Hospital
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: J.R.E. on May 08, 2008, 05:50:04 pm


Clearwater, Fl @ the County Health Dept , In October of 1985.

Ray
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: md on May 08, 2008, 08:55:46 pm
I found out that my partner was poz at about 11:30am on June 1st, 2006 while standing outside in my garden.

Tony was admitted to the hospital the previous evening after his condition had deteriorated to the point that I could no longer look after him and while his regular doctor was still convinced that he was just suffering from depression.

At the hospital they had run pretty much every test you can think of on him and everything looked reasonably normal except for a CT scan of his brain which showed "significant abnormalities" - one of the doctors had seen AIDS dementia cases in Chicago in the early 1990's and was pretty sure that is what it was but said they wouldn't know for sure until they got the results of his HIV test back which could take "a couple of days".

Next morning I called the hospital and later got a call back from the neurologist who had just done an MRI to confirm the previous night's CT scan - we discussed some of the things that he had found and I said something like "but we still don't know for sure whether he is HIV+ or not, do we?" and got the response "Oh, we got a positive result back already - they will do another test to confirm it but, with his symptoms, there really isn't any doubt".

Strangely enough my initial reaction was one of immense relief that, at last, I knew what was wrong with him.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: chm02 on May 09, 2008, 02:25:57 am
At home, Sept 30, 2006.
This thread prompted me to go back and look.
http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=4375.msg49697#msg49697 (http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=4375.msg49697#msg49697)
I can't believe it hasnt even been two years yet!
So much has happened.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: BrooklynGuy on May 09, 2008, 08:58:32 am
doctor's office on the upper ease side of manhattan, June 23, 2006, 10:30am with my already positive partner sitting next to me holding my hand.  we knew what it was, i was wasting and had a nasty case of PCP.  my behavior in the early '90's (prior to partner) would no doubt bring me to this day.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: AlanBama on May 09, 2008, 10:33:24 am
February 1987.   I was at my desk, at work (during every major tragedy of my life and every "national tragedy" I am ALWAYS at work!).   Received a phone call from a lab technician at my doctor's office; they had reluctantly done an HIV test, and were strictly against testing.  (ostrich with head-in-the-sand syndrome?  who knows?).   "Alan, I'm very sorry, your test is positive.  You have "IT".  Get your affairs in order, and try to enjoy the life you have left".  Click.

Still following that advice, by the way..... ;)
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: LiveWithIt on May 09, 2008, 12:23:10 pm
In 1996.  I had lost lots of weight and I knew what it was.  I found out in  a doctor's office.  I cried on the way there, but never again.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: NewYorkKat on May 09, 2008, 02:36:43 pm
December 12th, 2006 at the Callen and Lorde Health Clinic. I knew I would test positive the way the health worker walked out: very slowly and calmly, saying my name like it was my turn to be in the electric chair. "Your test came back positive". (I have chills even writing this).

That day was also a anthropology final so if that wasn't stressful enough, imagine learning your poz on top that.

God tested me and I won. I passed the class and will not need meds for a long time....
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: jabez on May 09, 2008, 08:19:39 pm
I had been feeling weak & sickly for several months.  Finally, I had a series of tests at my doctor's office in July 2007.   I called Friday afternoon to check the results.  The nurse was VERY chipper.  "All of your results are back in, and everything looks GREAT ... really, everything's just GREAT ... oh wait, we're still waiting for your HIV results, but everything else looks GREAT!!"  So I had all weekend to prepare myself mentally that maybe my HIV result wasn't going to be quite as 'great'.  (I knew that something was terribly wrong with my health.)  I was driving down the highway the following Monday morning, and my cell phone rang.  When I saw that it was the doctor's office, my heart pretty much stopped beating.  I pulled off the highway and took the call.  "Bad news, Sport," the doctor said, "your HIV test came back positive, but hey, they've got something called Protease Inhibitors now, and you'll probably live a good while longer.  Gotta go!  Talk to you later!"   Not the best day of my life.   The next three or four days, I had to mentally detach myself from the whole situation.     
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: emeraldize on May 09, 2008, 08:40:52 pm
 August 20, 2003 roughly 5:30 p.m. in the testing counselor's office at an ASO.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: minismom on May 09, 2008, 09:30:03 pm
I was at my parents house with Mini and her 2 older brothers (all we had at the time).  Doc called and told me to sit down, that the news wasn't good.  It was Mini's 8wk birthday.  Hubby was at work and I wouldn't call him and tell him.  He found out that night just before 11pm.

Mum
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Lis on May 10, 2008, 12:12:15 am
december 1986..

got a certified letter from the red cross..

opened it at the old post station in williamsburg Virigina...

the rest priceless....
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: cubbybear on May 10, 2008, 04:37:32 am
In the hospital bed in September 2005.  I was kinda dying.  I'm still dying, just a lot slower now ;) 
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: blue2boy on May 10, 2008, 04:59:43 am
at home,july 2006..my ex partner phoned me, just tested poz. and we knew he got it from me.the next day I was tested poz.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Central79 on May 10, 2008, 05:16:52 am
January 19th 2006 at the Mortimer Market Clinic in Central London. I tested because all my lymph nodes had come up but I was hoping it was syphilis  or even lymphoma. I laughed when they told me. On my way home I saw a guy in my year of med school - we were both going to be surgeons. I was really glad he didn't see me. Took a call about a summer job on my way and was generally surprised about how well I'd taken it. That soon changed!
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: carousel on May 10, 2008, 05:52:48 am
Friday 28 May 2004, Bank Holiday weekend, at about 6pm at the Victoria Clinic in Pimlico.  One of those walk in services, where they told me in 20 minutes and there was no support, just a nurse asking if I was alright.

Was on my way to meet a friend, who I thought there was a chance I'd infected, though luckily I didn't.

Went and sat by the River, just staring into space.  I chickened out of telling him that night, told him a few days later.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Cliff on May 10, 2008, 08:57:55 am
Planned parenthood in Houston, from a very nice and supportive nurse (who didn't want me to go).  I don't remember the date anymore.  Sometime in June 2003 probably.  Coming up on my 5th year now and things are much better than what I imagined they would be in 03. 
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: GSOgymrat on May 10, 2008, 09:30:46 am
I'm surprised so many people found out over the telephone. At Planned Parenthood they made you come in for the results, whether positive or negative, so they could provide counseling.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: rondrond on May 10, 2008, 09:41:11 am
I'm surprised so many people found out over the telephone. At Planned Parenthood they made you come in for the results, whether positive or negative, so they could provide counseling.

That was my thought too. I had two "guards" outside the room when I was told to make sure I did not leave without counseling first. That two week 'waiting' period is somthing else too. I remember calling and calling and kept getting, we can't tell you anything over the phone...must be in person...
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: mjmel on May 10, 2008, 04:11:08 pm
I'm surprised so many people found out over the telephone. At Planned Parenthood they made you come in for the results, whether positive or negative, so they could provide counseling.

Likewise. I was told in person as that was the only option anyone was given back then ('89). Also I was offered counseling if I wished. I did not need the counseling but I remember the sensitivity, compassion, and professionalism of the the staff of that clinic. It did make a difference in the way the rest of my day panned out. It is horrible the way some the forum members were informed. More in line with a processing plant than a professionally staffed health clinic or doctors office. Totally f**ked up!

Mike
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Lou-ah-vull on May 10, 2008, 09:52:55 pm
I was on a business trip in San Francisco when my insurance agent called to tell me my application had been declined for medical reasons.  He said he did not know the reason, but that it had to be life threatening and it was essential I call my doctor.  I knew then and there that I had "flunked" the HIV test.


Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Blixer on May 10, 2008, 10:05:07 pm
It was Jan. 9, 2006 at my doctors office in a small town in a small town about 150 miles south of St. Louis.  (That's the short version).

I had gone to my doctor on December 22, 2005 because of swollen lymph nodes.  She drew blood for a number of tests, one of them being an HIV test because she knew I was gay.  I didn't hear anything all through the New Years and I guess I really didn't think about it taking so long.  I chalked it up to the holidays.  On Friday, Jan. 6, 2006 my doctor calls and said the test had come back negative.  I went out and celebrated that night.  I actually met a very nice guy that unfortunately I never called because things were about to change big time.

Then on Monday, Jan 9, 2006 I get a call in the early afternoon from the doctor's nurse.  She said "we need you to come by the office after work today.  And if you can't make it by 5 PM we will wait for you."  Well, doctors don't call you to their office and say they will wait just to give you good news.  I guess I can be thankful they didn't just tell me over the phone.  But by the time I got to the office I had already figured out the scenario.  They would put me in a room (which they did immediately) and then my doctor would come in, she would sit down, look at me, and say "I'm sorry, there was a mistake, your HIV test was actually positive."  Which is pretty much exactly as it turned out.  The explanation was that they tested for both HIV 1 and HIV 2 and the test results got separated.  The HIV 2 was negative and it came back first.   I did fine getting the news, probably because it was what I expected with the call back and such.  But the 45 minute drive back home was pretty intense with a lot of soul searching and a bit of crying.  I told my two best friends that night but didn't tell anyone else for about a month.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Okealyshire on May 12, 2008, 01:47:19 pm
Thanks, everyone, for telling your stories. Feel like I've gotten to know the folks around here a bit better.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: hivsweden on May 12, 2008, 04:10:05 pm
In hospital after being admitted due to pneumonia which didn't go away with regular antibiotics. (PCP)
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: pink_beauty on May 12, 2008, 08:28:33 pm
February 18, 2008. I was at work when I got a call from the blood bank I gave blood to 5 days previous. The lady of the phone wouldn't tell me why, but I needed to go see the medical director. I knew what that meant. I went to see him and he said "You have HIV and you can NEVER give blood again.". No crap. Talk about bedside manner.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: minismom on May 12, 2008, 10:41:36 pm
We were never offered cousoling nor were we given any information.  I didn't even know about the side-effects from meds until I came here 6mths ago - over 7yrs after dx.  When we went back for another test, we were given a handfull of prescriptions and an appointment card telling us to go back in 2wks.  No help, no encouragement, no counsoling, no suggestions, no information.  I'd never thought about until now.

Mum
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: RapidRod on May 15, 2008, 08:35:59 am
April 12th 1984 at my doctor's office. Took a free HIV test when I went in for a yearly physical because he was given the test and he wanted to see what the results look like on paper. Well, I tested positive. He freaked out being the first test he has ever given and I was a family friend. It took him longer to quit crying, then it did me and then he recommended me to another doctor for follow up care and that's where I am today.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Peter6836 on May 15, 2008, 09:02:31 am
Like Jan I was in a hospital bed going through a severe seroconversion. My Doctor who I have known for years admitted me under the pretense that he needed to do some more tests, he already knew the results of my HIV test. But he waited to tell me until I was in the hospital. He really did handle it well, I am very thankful for his great bedside manner. We now joke that I have broken him in well. He immediately went and found the best ID doctor that he knew of and asked him to take my case. I am blessed with good doctors.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: next2u on May 15, 2008, 09:36:47 pm
sitting in my car on wed, sept 12 930ish am. late for work, parked adjacent to my work buidling typing away. dr called, i cried, told the fam & friends. then told my boss & went home. it was a beautiful day in so cal; i like it here.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: nanamole on May 17, 2008, 09:14:31 pm
I went to state health dept.  Counselor was very non chalant.  Finally mentioned " Oh and by the way you are h.i.v. poz.   I was devastated.  I cried , never truly forgave hime for being  so cold...
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: rondrond on May 17, 2008, 10:24:25 pm
Hi, nanamole,
welcome to the forums. boy, that was pretty insensitive of him. How long has that been? Are you dong ok today?
ronnie
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Desertguy on May 17, 2008, 11:53:34 pm
Around Spt. 27th, 2007, I had gone in for STD's after a woman claimed I gave her Gential Herpes.  WHen I went to my GP & ask for test he ask if I wanted an HIV test while I was at it.  I just figured why not!  The next week I was working in Yuma, AZ when my GP called and said I need to come into the office for a visit.  I was 200 miles from home so I got it out of him.  He said I tested clean for everything else but came up + for HIV.  He then prceeded to lecture me about safe sex, told me he just gave me a prescription for Viagra and I was being promiscus.  He then proceeded to tell me that I can be arrested for having un-protected sex with woman.  Not one word of advice, or symathy.  SO for the next few weeks I was a total wreck.  I had no one to talk too, I wasn't aware of the new meds that were out & assumed that I would be dead soon.  ANyway here I am healthy as ever and I beleive that I will die of a normal death befroe this takes me.

Oh & I never have gone back to the GP all I want to do is tell him to go F' himself & remiind him of his oah & greed he took.

An anyway was bored so over did the reply.

Every one have a great nite
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: SecretKeeper on May 17, 2008, 11:59:35 pm
HUSBAND'S RESULTS - June 2007, on my parent's front porch on the phone after my grandma's funeral.  At least I could have an excuse for the tears.

MY RESULTS - September 2007, in a little bitty out-dated clinic room at the VNA after deciding to get re-tested due to a weird bout of canker sores and hives (and paranoia).   (I had to have been infected approx 2 weeks before my husband got tested.)
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: DanielMark on May 18, 2008, 09:30:28 am
Found out September 1988 in my doctor's office. I was 28. I'd had a hunch for a while so it wasn't a complete shock, just a slight feeling in the pit of my stomach of wanting to barf.

Doctor: Well, this isn't the kind of news I like to give anyone but. . . .

He told me I had probably about six months to live. Ha! Twenty years later I’m still above ground, tho they keep dreaming up new ways to try and kill me.

That evening I called everyone who was important to me and who knew I was being tested and told them. Seems like 100 years ago.

That’s more than five sentences isn’t it?  ;D

Daniel
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: WillyWump on May 18, 2008, 08:59:36 pm
Follow up appointment with my doctor. He told me I didn't have Mono.....and then just matter-of-factly said "you've tested positive for HIV" and then wished me luck and sent me across the hall to the HIV clinic. Blah.

2 sentences, 3 if you count "blah" as a sentence.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: thunter34 on May 18, 2008, 09:10:00 pm
2 sentences, 3 if you count "blah" as a sentence.

I've felt sentenced to blah for some time now.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Catman on May 18, 2008, 10:17:12 pm
 Officially during 1989 while I was in college. I was at an Army Recruiting Base in Bayamon, PR. I was escorted by 2 GI's when I entered the premises and when I left. I was calm about the news but I never understood why the need of the escorts like if I was a terrorist or something! ??? Funny because out of about 18 candidates to enroll that week I had the best scores in all the aptitude tests! ;D Their lose!
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: nanamole on May 21, 2008, 03:29:47 pm
Hey thanks Ronnie, that was over 10 years ago, I am in a better place now, realized that I may  die of old age now instead of AIDS, treatmen t was better when I became infected, if it had been 6 years earlier, I may not be here today
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: sacinsc on May 22, 2008, 01:45:33 am
September 2007 - Planning period in my classroom. Cell phone rang 10 minutes before my final class of the day. Saw it said "Doctor"...picked up and the rest is history. Kids came in 10 minutes later with me a basket case.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: brooklynpoz on May 22, 2008, 08:05:42 am
It was Monday, August 9th, 2004 at about 2:30 pm.
I went with my boyfriend July 23rd 2004 for the blood work.
I was told abruptly by a nurse of Russian descent :" you're poz, don't worry, these days, you can live 10-20 years" , and she handed me a pamplet, said read this, and left me in the room by myself.
NO COMPASSION AT ALL.
My boyfriend was tested negative, and remains negative. We just celebrated our 4th anniversary, on April 30th.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: filmjimwest on May 22, 2008, 09:41:49 am
New to the forum here. I took a rapid test on 2/7/08, at the local glbt clinic, it came back positive for the antibodies to HIV. They took blood for a second test and those results came back positive too. They referred me to local HIV specialists, and the rest, as they say, is history. It was quite a surprise, but I went home that night and just was thankful that with today's meds, that there is a fighting chance to have a full life  :) In addition, I did alot of mental and emotional housecleaning and decided what was important to myself in this world.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Coffeechick88 on May 22, 2008, 09:58:08 am
May 2001--My one exposure had been 3 months prior.  I had one negative test (not knowing it was too early as I was not educated about it at the time), but had gotten a letter from the Red Cross telling me that the tests they had run on my blood indicated possible exposure and to get tested.  Told my doctor to order me an HIV test.  One week later, they called and told me I needed to make an appointment.  Sat in doctor's office sure he'd tell me it was just a false positive (after all, I thought at the time, who actually get it with no risk factors and only one possible exposure), but the door opened and it was written all over his face what the results were......

Sorry that was more than 5 sentences, but I tend to be very wordy when I type.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: hankgaguy on May 22, 2008, 09:41:59 pm
May 22, 2006 was the day I began to experience severe seroconversion. Tested negative at that time. Thus, today I'm 2 years old.

June 8, 2007: Received call from the doctor's office while I was at work around 4 PM. Tried to set appointment for the next day, but new what was up, so stated I would be over in 15 minutes (small town). Told my administrative assistant and my City Clerk that I was going, and what I likely thought was going to happen.

Got the news. The doctor (family practitioner in the far-flung suburbs) was rather timid in the news. I was numb, naturally, but otherwise ready to press on. Was told I should find a specialist that he could refer me too (no further tests, nada). So sweet, huh?

Went back to City Hall and my office. My assistant looked up at me from her desk and I shook my head. Everyone cried for me in my department. I shed not one tear. Called everyone in the office and informed them of my test. The one thing that I'll always remember is turning my head and seeing my Development Inspector, a 72-year old man, in tears for me. (OK, more than 5 sentences, but still a searing memory).
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Basquo on May 22, 2008, 10:37:50 pm
Like Iggy's thread, my anniversary is tomorrow. It was the Friday before Memorial Day. My doctor called and told me that the ELISA had come back positive on Tuesday, and we were waiting for the Western Blot, and "that's where we are now."  I kept quiet for three days, not wanting to worry my partner who had helped nurse me through a recent surgery for freakishly enlarged lymph nodes. Then my doctor called me Friday and all the pieces fell into place in my head, like Tetris, and I began to face my own mortality at 33.

I went home and told my partner, and he confessed that he really couldn't remember the last time he'd been tested.

Prior to this my post was six sentences. I'll be the first to say that my time is not limited. That's like being told you have six to twelve months--fuck a bunch of that.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Okealyshire on May 23, 2008, 07:43:58 pm
Prior to this my post was six sentences. I'll be the first to say that my time is not limited. That's like being told you have six to twelve months--fuck a bunch of that.

Far be it from me to limit anyone's time -- pithiness maybe isn't such a good idea. I'm very grateful that folks have used as many sentences as necessary to tell their stories.

(hello from Amsterdam--biz trip this week)
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on May 23, 2008, 08:15:15 pm
GYN suggested the test as part of my yearly exam.  Went back a week later on December 22, 1993 to get my results, I had just turned 24 the previous November.  Over the echo of "8 to 10 years" playing over and over in my head, I said out loud to the doctor, "This couldn't have happened to a better person.  This will NOT get me."  I drove home, numb, to tell my BF I was poz and I must have gotten it from him, bec he was the only one I had ever had unprotected sex with.  He "tested" the next month but turns out he had been poz since May '88, knew it and didn't tell me.  We married a year later in October '94 and he died of non-Hodgkins lymphoma in August '96.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Catman on May 23, 2008, 10:17:09 pm
 My gosh! These stories are really making me tear-eyed. :'( Specially "Hankgaguy" and "Moonlight". It really requires a brave heart to call everyone at the office and share the news like in Hankgaguy's story. I would really like to know how things have worked out at the office since that moment until now.
  And Moonlight, it requires a big heart full of love to marry the man who infected you. I admire that because your way and age of getting infected was very similar to mine. I never hated the guy afterwards for infecting me. He was a "bad boy" but hate was never in my heart. As a matter of fact, I think of him and just feel sadness because I see now that he was afraid and lonely. That was in the 80's when there wasn't much news or treatments available. Who wouldn't be scared and desperate like him. He passed away about two years after infecting me in 1986. Hate, anger, nor depression have ever dominated my heart and maybe that's one of the reasons why I've managed to live quite long and healthy until now...I think having bad emotions locked in our heart and mind can have a whiplash effect on our health.  :-* We should always try to be friendly with others, love ourselves for who we are, and be patient and loving even with those who have hurt us (obviously, the grudge may appear every now and then, but I get rid of it asap) ;)
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: hjeffs on May 24, 2008, 10:44:03 am
June 16, 2005 got the call at work, "no I can't say on the phone when can you come in." I left work and was told 30 minutes later. The next call was to my partner to get tested. He got tested and was told he was positive on my birthday a week after I was told. We are both on medication.
Jeff
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Trish on May 24, 2008, 07:13:05 pm
Wow!  Amazing stories... I haven't been around in a long time, but I felt compelled to chime in.

It was November 1989.  I was at work on Broadway in downtown NYC.  I called the doc's office and he told me I had to come in, he wouldn't give the results over the phone.  I knew the result right then.  I insisted he tell, he did -- "You tested positive, please come to the office."  I left work in a daze, crying and crying walking the streets of downtown Manhattan feeling all alone.  The rest is kind of blurry.  I think I made it to the doc's office a few hours later.  Saw him that once and never went back.  Denial for 11 years.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: joemutt on May 25, 2008, 01:10:35 am
^
Hi Trish!

June 21 1997, Bangkok, doctor's office.
I had asked to test my blood for 'heavy metals from air pollution' as I was feeling tired.
A visiting friend had said a few weeks before : 'I see your getting used to the tropical climate, you walk much slower than you did before'.
'no metals but you have hiv' was the dr's somewhat gleeful statement.
While I am happy now to have been diagnosed I told the dr then I hadnt asked to
test me for hiv (guess I was in denial too...) the dr's name has since been erased from my file.
Started meds in the beginning of July 1997.
I think my infection dates from 1992 or 1994.
ed for sp err
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: northernguy on May 25, 2008, 01:45:04 am
April 28, 2006 in my docs office.  I knew I was in trouble when they called me to some in for the results of what I thought were routine tests.  Ironically I had asked for the HIV test as an afterthought.  Came home and cried and told my partner, who is still the only one who knows other than my doc and dentist.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: ANGEL42 on May 25, 2008, 07:04:29 am
July 1997, less than a year after my father passed and found out at my Gp office by myself. Cried hysterically all the way to my Moms house and than sat with her and cried all day.....One of my sadest days ever.

ANGEL
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: carcrash82 on May 25, 2008, 09:38:36 am
I found out twice. Was tooo scared for years to have a needle in my arm so i bought pin-prick home tests from the net (china). Got drunk whilst playing scrabble with boyf and mum, and thought i should test myself. We all did. I was poz. Had to wait till Xmas was over and get a real test at royal free. I was CD$50 and VL 1million 2%, but i felt fine.
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: MOONLIGHT1114 on May 25, 2008, 10:56:12 am
And Moonlight, it requires a big heart full of love to marry the man who infected you. I admire that because your way and age of getting infected was very similar to mine. I never hated the guy afterwards for infecting me. He was a "bad boy" but hate was never in my heart. As a matter of fact, I think of him and just feel sadness because I see now that he was afraid and lonely. That was in the 80's when there wasn't much news or treatments available. Who wouldn't be scared and desperate like him. He passed away about two years after infecting me in 1986. Hate, anger, nor depression have ever dominated my heart and maybe that's one of the reasons why I've managed to live quite long and healthy until now...I think having bad emotions locked in our heart and mind can have a whiplash effect on our health.  :-* We should always try to be friendly with others, love ourselves for who we are, and be patient and loving even with those who have hurt us (obviously, the grudge may appear every now and then, but I get rid of it asap) ;)

Catman, you hit the nail on the head, our stories are very similar.  My guy was a bad boy too, a long-haired rock n' roller in the late 80s.  He didn't handle getting the diagnosis very well at all, obviously.  He was only 20 when he found out, and he died when he was 28.

Our minds can keep our bodies strong!  :)

~ Cindy
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: hankgaguy on May 25, 2008, 08:35:56 pm
Yes, Catman is indeed correct. Having a great attitude and not looking back are the key to successful living, no matter to what extent that may be.

To answer your question, the  people I work with at City Hall have been (for the most part) very supportive of my condition and have fought with me during the worst of the initial news and treatment. I had "reverse seroconversion" issues about a month into the meds and a plethora of staph infections up to MRSA back during Thanksgiving.

The only negative stuff came from one of the city councilman, who wanted me fired after being told I was HIV positive. Well, after a 14-page memorandum to the Mayor, City Council, and their legal counsel informing them of my condition, my prognosis, and my legals rights under ADA, that was resoved.

I've been very fortunate to work in a small (under 5,000) town whose leaders have been very accepting of me, although their familiarity with me from my prior years of service generated a good report and respect that surpassed my HIV status. Many wanted me to become the City Manager recently, to which I had to turn down due to my own professional goals and the fact that I could not take on more stress than what I deal with now (foreclosure crisis, budget crisis, etc. etc.).

I'm actually getting along quite well, although I am very exhausted at the end of my usual 10-12 hour days. I'm working on that, though. The first year I knew was going to require a lot of adjustment. This coming year will be better. Every day will be better.

It's the times that we are presented with tremendous challenge and how we deal with that challenge is what defines our character!
Title: Re: Where were you when you first found out? (in five sentences or fewer)
Post by: Winiroo on May 25, 2008, 08:53:33 pm
Summer of 1992 Parkland Memorial Hospital Obstetrics clinic.