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Author Topic: Risk of infection with ulcers and mutual masturbation and kissing?  (Read 6999 times)

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Offline DecoyBarrier

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I am not too scared, because I have spent the last two days meditating, inhaling and exhaling, calming my mind down.

I am just asking theese questions to end this cycle of fears, by confronting it with the advice of experts.

I have ulcers in my mouth from time to time. They have a yellow central point, and they hurt, when I move my mouth. I don't know what initiates this phenomena, but it is NOT my oral hygiene, because I take good care of my mouth.
Anyways, I met another guy, and it started out as a pretty cool date, because we were talking all night long, drinking wine and telling jokes and stuff. After some time I decided to kiss him on the cheek. He was very happy for me and decided to kiss me on my mouth.  I told him that I have ulcers in my mouth so it is not a good idea to kiss me deeply, but he kept pushing, and I failed to resist any further. I don't know if he had bleeding wounds/sores or ulcers in his mouth, but I sure did have ulcers in mine, though they were not bleeding.

After that we proceeded to the bedroom, where we were talking for an hour, cuddling in his bed. We decided to go to sleep. Well we slept, like 30 minutes and then we masturbated each other. I do not know if his pre-cum and semen came into any contact with my penis, but after he jerked his own cock for a while, he stroked my penis with his hand, and he even played around at my urethra.

My questions are:
1. Should I get tested for kissing with ulcers in my mouth? I do not need a test for the peace of my mind, but if it does indeed pose a risk, then I will take a test.
2. Since the cells, found in the urethra can be infected by HIV more easily, if his pre-cum or semen entered my urethra (which I do not know if happened or not) should I be worried? Should I get tested? Again, the test wouldn't be for the peace of my mind, but if it poses a threat, or a significant threat, than I will go and get tested.
3. How does that window period thing work? I hear that in America it is 3 months. Here in Europe it is 6 weeks, and in Hungary, where I live it is 2 weeks. Im pretty much totally confused over this issue, so the last test I've been to was takes 8 months after the actual incident.
4. If my HIV test is negative, does it mean that no type of HIV (HIV-1, HIV-2) have ever infected me?

I thank you for your answers in advance. This forum makes our world a little bit better to live in.

Offline Ann

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Re: Risk of infection with ulcers and mutual masturbation and kissing?
« Reply #1 on: June 27, 2012, 06:37:17 am »
Decoy,

1. Kissing is absolutely not a risk for hiv infection, regardless of ulcers or whatever. Not only is saliva not infectious, but it also contains over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage hiv and render it unable to infect.

2. Hiv is not transmitted by getting cum on your penis or any other part of your body during mutual masturbation. Sexually speaking, hiv is transmitted during unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse - and that's it.

3. The window period for hiv testing is three months the world over. However, a test at six weeks is a very good indication of your true hiv status. The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six weeks, with the average time to seroconversion being only 22 days. A six week negative must be confirmed at the three month point, but is highly unlikely to change.

I don't know where you get the idea that the window period is only 2 weeks in Hungary. There are NO tests that can rule out or confirm hiv infection in that short period of time.

4. If your test result is negative at or after three months following a true risk (you have NOT reported any risks for hiv infection), then it means you do not have hiv.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST FOR HIV SPECIFICALLY OVER KISSING OR MUTUAL MASTURBATION, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline DecoyBarrier

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Re: Risk of infection with ulcers and mutual masturbation and kissing?
« Reply #2 on: June 27, 2012, 08:44:34 am »
Hello Ann,

First of all, allow me to say, that your avatar is the sweetest kitten that I've ever seen. :)
Thanks for your help, I feel a lot much better now.

Where did I get the idea that an HIV infection can be spotted after 2 weeks? At the anonym-HIV center. In Hungary there is an option to take an HIV test anonymously (free of charge), and the doctor told me that 2 weeks of waiting is enough. I didn't believe him though, so I always waited 4-6 weeks.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Risk of infection with ulcers and mutual masturbation and kissing?
« Reply #3 on: June 27, 2012, 08:56:53 am »
You are right about waiting. The average time to seroconversion is 22 days. All but the smallest number of those who are going to serocovert will do so within 4-6 weeks after a risky incident.

Three months is the testing point for a reliable and conclusive negative result.
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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Re: Risk of infection with ulcers and mutual masturbation and kissing?
« Reply #4 on: June 27, 2012, 08:59:03 am »
Decoy,

I shudder to think how many hiv infections they're missing in Hungary due to testing people too soon. Hopefully it was a misunderstanding on someone's part and this isn't standard practice across the entire country. Either that, or they've developed some sort of super test that they're hiding from the rest of the world (which I doubt).

While it's true that an acute infection might be caught as early as two weeks, it would be relatively rare. And you simply cannot rule out hiv after only two weeks. Most people take at least three weeks, some four or five. Pretty much everyone will seroconvert and test positive by six weeks, but a few may take slightly longer. That's why the window period remains at three months - to catch someone who may take slightly longer than six weeks.

This is all academic anyway - you didn't have a risk. Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you won't have a risk in future either. It really is that simple!!!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline DecoyBarrier

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Re: Risk of infection with ulcers and mutual masturbation and kissing?
« Reply #5 on: June 27, 2012, 10:02:45 am »
Ann,

Here in Hungary I am pretty sure, that a LOT of infections are missed. There are around 4000 registered infections in the whole country.
People here are terribly uneducated and they don't like to think too much. My friends don't use condoms, because most of the girls use pills (pills only protect against pregnancy, but not against STDs). I usually tell them to use condoms, but they keep telling, that no need to worry, cause the girls looked "fine".

I am gay, so I don't worry about pregnancy, but I don't even engage in anal sex, so I didn't have to use a condom yet.

Thank you for your answer :)

Offline Ann

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Re: Risk of infection with ulcers and mutual masturbation and kissing?
« Reply #6 on: June 27, 2012, 10:23:51 am »
Decoy,

You're welcome.

Tell your friends that you know a woman who has been hiv positive for fifteen years, not on meds and she "looks fine" too. In fact, I'll be 50 later on this year and most people can't believe it - they think I'm in my late 30s or early 40s at the oldest. You simply cannot go by how someone looks, where they live or what they do for a living to decide their probable hiv status. I hope your friends realise that before it's too late for them.

People can also "look fine" and be living with herpes, gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis and a whole host of other more common STIs. Your friends are playing with fire, let's hope they don't get burned.

When/if you do start having anal intercourse, just make sure you're using condoms with plenty of lube and you'll be ok where hiv is concerned. Make sure you read through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use them correctly and with confidence. We're not born knowing the correct use of condoms, so get reading!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline DecoyBarrier

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Re: Risk of infection with ulcers and mutual masturbation and kissing?
« Reply #7 on: June 27, 2012, 10:33:46 am »
Ann,

Thanks for caring.
I have a condom with me all the time, though I'm afraid I will never use it, because in this country it is close to impossible to build true gay love. Everything is about sex here. Is it different where you live?

I will tell my friends to be careful but last time they sort of asked me to shut up, because I "scared them".

I wish there were more "fine looking" and indeed fine and cute women around like you.

May your days be long and full of joy.

Offline Ann

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Re: Risk of infection with ulcers and mutual masturbation and kissing?
« Reply #8 on: June 27, 2012, 11:26:39 am »
Decoy,

You're welcome.

There's plenty of loveless sex no matter where in the world you go. It's human nature to enjoy sex and not everyone wants emotional ties. I hope you find the love you crave some day - there's a guy out there for you somewhere, you just have to find each other.

Next time your mates tell you to shut up because you're scaring them, tell them they should be scared and all they have to do to stop being scared is to use condoms.

About that condom you carry with you - change it for a new one regularly (every couple months or so at least) to make sure it's still in date and in good shape. Latex can degrade with time and exposure to heat (like body heat if you carry it in your wallet) and degraded latex can cause the condom to break. You don't want that!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline DecoyBarrier

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Re: Risk of infection with ulcers and mutual masturbation and kissing?
« Reply #9 on: June 27, 2012, 11:43:47 am »
:)
I definitely don't want that. :D

Offline DecoyBarrier

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Re: Risk of infection with ulcers and mutual masturbation and kissing?
« Reply #10 on: July 26, 2012, 02:51:36 am »
Hello!

I was banned in the last few weeks, and I understand it was a consequence of my lack of reading the rules.
I apologize for my inappropriate behaviour and I have read the rules and I hope I will not cause any sort of trouble again.

Sorry.

 


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