Goes to show money don't buy happiness as a LTS:

[jm1953]

Hey members:

Haven't checked in for awhile, hope all are doing well.

My dad died last February and probate is finally over.  I had to hire a lawyer to deal with my last surviving blood relative, my sister, who wanted everything.  It's been a long expensive fight.  I had to cave some just to get this thing over with because my attorney fees were huge, and it was stressing me out. 

So now I have enough to do what I always wanted to do.  But unfortunately, the timing with my disease is lousy.  My health has declined to half of a year ago even though I have been keeping up with my med regimen and have made most of my doctors appts. and procedures which are numerous. 

Bottom line, just don't have the energy or strength to do what I want to do.  Once in a life time stuff.  The only thing I think I may be able to do which is a stretch is to buy another home.  My initial intention was to move to San Diego, but with my health as it is and doctor's all in place here, a move seems out of the question. 

God knows I pray things will change, but each day is a challenge as many of us know.  Meanwhile I have been donating heavily to charities as tax write offs.  In particular those dealing with AIDS.  Many of which are grass root agencies trying to take off and really need the funding, like those organizations helping youth with AIDS or affected by AIDS in their lives.  Also my focus has been on organizations who are trying desperately to save endangered species.  Giving does make me happy.

Facing some surgeries I have put off, now some are necessary as I can't tolerate the pain.  Not trying to sound selfish or sorry for myself, but the lesson that I keep learning through all my 26 years living with this virus is money just can't buy health.

After my father's death my sister and her family have divorced me, for many reasons, probably my lifestyle, having AIDS, but particularly getting legal representation.  Been in therapy dealing with that.  Hard not to accept some of the guilt when really it isn't even about me I guess.

I know many of you are struggling with your health too, and get strength from many of you maintaining a positive attitude.  Hopefully I will get to that point as well.

Always appreciate your support and caring,

Best,

JM

[harleymc]

Hey JM,
sorry to hear about your father. Glad that you stood up for your share of  the estate.

The grief and morning process by itself can knock even the toughest of us hard but having the conflict won't have helped either.

Get all that surgery out of the way and treat yourself to a holiday, maybe a cruise if that's your thing, but something where you get away from home and get some pampering.

Good to hear from you again.
Hugs from downunder

[joyluckclub]

My prayers are with you.  I glad you stood up to your family.  Be good to yourself.  You deserve it!

[Ann]

My prayers are with you.  I glad you stood up to your family.  Be good to yourself.  You deserve it!

Joy, I understand you mean well, but as someone who was diagnosed in 2005 you are not permitted to post in the Long Term Survivor's forum.

Please read the LTS forum's Welcome Thread and do not post in this forum again.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Ann