worried about test

[jham]

dear friends,

my case goes back to last year's december... I had an encounter with another male, where he performed oral sex on me without protection and then masturbated me with his hands dirty with his cum. back at the time, I was frantic but then I time passed, I felt no symptoms at all... so I just let it go. since then, I have had no other unsafe encounters with anyone.

However, now I am obliged by my job to go through an HIV test, and this encounter has come once again to my mind. I have read your forums and it says that this sort of mutual masturbation is a safe practice, that no case of HIV transmission has been reported by doing this...

However, the rest of the internet differs from you... why? this has been scaring me so much, I'm shivering from fear to have to get tested tomorrow... why are the other websites telling me that masturbation with someone else's cum is dangerous, that it can go through the urethra and infect me? I know that receiving oral sex is pretty much safe, once that saliva won't infect me.. however, what about the semen? he did have his semen on his hands, and his hands touched the head of my penis, my opening.

please help me with this doubt. I am so scared.

thank you very much for your time.

best regards.

[RapidRod]

Masturbation and oral sex is not a risk of contracting HIV. As to why other website aren't up to date with the scientific data is beyond me. You had no exposure to HIV in the situations you brought to the forum.

[jham]

thank you very much for your quick response, friends. you do a very good job over here.

I really wish that those websites would update themselves, because they really scare people.

once again, thank you very much. I hope my tests go fine tomorrow.

best regards.

[RapidRod]

You're welcome and you won't have any trouble getting a negative test.

[Ann]

jham,

You need to know that neither symptoms, nor the lack of symptoms mean anything when it comes to diagnosing hiv. Only testing will reliably reveal you hiv status.

You didn't have a risk at all. Sexually speaking, only unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse are risky. Unless you've been having unprotected intercourse you haven't told us about, you're sure to get a negative result on your test.

Here's what you need to know in order to remain hiv negative:


You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann

[jham]

Ann,

I had no unprotected sex with anyone. After this incident, I got a girlfriend and she is a virgin, so I know she is clean. Before the incident with the other male, I was also a virgin. These were the only two people I have ever had sexual contact with.

So far, with my girlfriend, I had no vaginal or anal contacts, so no need for a condom. We masturbate each other, but that's pretty much it.

So, my only scare was with the semen of the man coming in contact with my penis during masturbation. He does look healthy and is well educated, but as you said, symptoms and appearances don't mean anything.

I am really believing that the test will come negative... but I have to admit that I slept terribly tonight with fear and nightmares, and that I predict that I'll continue to sleep this way until the results. I guess I scared myself senseless from reading all I could find on the internet.

I don't mean to bother any longer, but do you guys have any sort of literature that could help ease my mind? It is funny how I was at peace with this incident for so long until recently, just because of the test. Back in the day I read your forums and some other and found my peace... but now it is haunting me again.

Anyway, thank you very much for your replies. Keep up the good work. Let's wait for the test to come back with a big bold negative. I'll sure proudly post this result.

take care.
best of best regards.
 

[Andy Velez]

J, first of all you need to correct your terminology. People are neither "clean" nor "dirty" with regard to HIV. It's a virus and one is either negative or positive. I am sure you did not mean to be offensive but it is insulting to those living with the virus to use a term like "clean."

Literature? Have you read our lesson on Transmission? There's a link to it in the welcome thread which opens this section.

Yours was absolutely a no risk situation. You are worrying needlessly but if you need to test for your peace of mind then by all means do so and get the inevitable negative result. And even though you say your gf is a virgin, I would still suggest that she get tested before you two start having unprotected intercourse. It removes any doubts in the situation. 

[jham]

Andy,

I am truly sorry for the bad choice of words. I don't mean to insult in no way, I am just so not educated on the subject. I am truly truly sorry.

I have read the link, in fact I believe I have read the whole forums, as well as others. It is just that many articles mention the data from studies, but I never find those studies in full to be read.

But I don't need more literature. The more I read, the more I worry. I will stop worrying, just like I was able to do after the incident, almost an year ago. I will also refrain from posting, once I am probably being a pain in the a**.

and my girl, I don't need to worry about her. I truly don't.

thanks all.
best regards,
jham 

[Andy Velez]

And I was just taking the op to educate you about terms as I know you were not intending to be offensive.

You're also right about not reading more. All it does is churn up more fears when the only thing that will relieve you is getting the inevitable negative result.

Cheers.

[jham]

just to let you, guys, and future worried searchers THAT IT CAME BACK NEGATIVE.

thanks a lot for your support. I am so happy.

best regards!!!!
all best,
jham

[Andy Velez]

That happy result is no surprise but a negative result is always a beautiful thing.

Cheers.