POZ Community Forums
Main Forums => Pre-HAART Long-Term Survivors => Topic started by: MarcoPoz on January 26, 2011, 09:45:47 am
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I'm not writing this post for sympathy--my mom was much too pragmatic for that and face it, I think there are many here who actually wish me many negative things--that is , if you can believe your own PM in-box.
I wanted to post a note here saying that I've recently experienced the death of my mother--completely unexpected--and susequent new responsibilities in taking care of my medically fragile step-father.
Perhaps this is something many of us LTSrs experience or will experience. My mother was a very special person and we shared a very close relationship. In many ways she was my role model. I always wished I had her 'heart' and total empathy for others. She was a strong willed Sicilian who made her way onto the broadway stage as a dancer, chorus gypsy and was a part of the American Ballet Theatre. She did this all while having 3 children, getting a divorce and dancing her way across the county and Europe. One of my first memories was of watching her applying makeup back stage during a run of The King and I.
She was always completely honest with me--as I was with her. She said that she was proud of me for not letting HIV destroy my soul, humor and outlook--and for turning my response to it into advocacy.
I miss her so much. No matter how many deaths we LTSrs see, we never really get used to it, do we? I got great advice from a friend on this subject. He said, "Time really doesn't heal wounds, it just numbs the sting a bit. You never learn to deal with it, you just learn how to carry it better."
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I'm sorry for you loss , my condolences to you and your family .
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Marco, sorry for the loss of your mother, she sounds like she was a very Strong Person (my mother was like THIS), and I'm sure she loved you as her son, I hope this helps you out some in your hours, and Days of need
I took care of my aging Parents 25 yrs ago, until they both passed-away, my Father died in May 88, and my Mother died in September 88, so I to know how that is, I give up my nice condo, to actually moved in with them, to take care of them, and still worked 12 to 18 hrs a day, until 10 yrs later, I had to give up my job, due to failing health & AIDS...
Marco, your Mother is in a much better place, and for what it's worth, it will get better with the passing of time, she will always be a part of you until the day you die, Marco, things will get better, they always do in the passing of a loved one, it's ok to be sad and ask and sympathy, nothing in the world wrong with this, so feel free to Grieve, it's part of the process ;)
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Marco
What beautiful memories you have of your Mother.
My condolences on her passing.
Joel
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Sorry for your loss :'( May she rest in peace
Alan
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Hey Marco,
I am very sorry for the loss you have experienced. Your mother sounds like she led a wonderful life and had a big soul.
May she rest in peace.
I wish you well in assuming your new responsibilities with your step father.
You are right, the pain doesn't really go away, we just learn to live with it.
HUGS,
Mark
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Thank you all so very much. Remember, tell the people you love, that you love them. I have no doubts that my mom knew every day how much I loved her.
And don't sweat the small shit.
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Remember, tell the people you love, that you love them.
Amen! There's no such thing as saying "I love you" too much to the people you love. ;)
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I'm truly sorry for you loss. I'm fortunate to still have my mother. I lost my father suddenly 8 years ago with no prior warning. He was the picture of health and we had no clue. You're correct, the pain never goes away, but it evolves into a deeper love. I still think of my father several times a day and it brings comfort.
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I'm sorry for your loss.
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Thank you all so very much. Remember, tell the people you love, that you love them. I have no doubts that my mom knew every day how much I loved her.
And don't sweat the small shit.
Good advice. ..sorry for your loss.
Ronnie
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Marco,
My heart goes out to you. I lost my mother on June 19th, 2002. I miss the many conversations that we used to have. She was one of my main supports, throughout the years, when I became HIV positive. I also had that very close relationship, even though we were 1,400 miles apart, so I understand.
Ray
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Marco,
I'm so sorry to hear of your mother's passing. It's awesome that you had such a strong relationship with her. It sounds like she was quite an amazing woman.
Regards,
Henry
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Marco
Sorry to hear about you mom passing. I'm glad that you have many fond memories of her. She sounds like she had an exciting life.
May she rest in peace.
Jeff
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Sorry to hear of your mothers passing, I to lost my mother and mother in law a long time ago and it still hurts.
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Marco, I'm very sorry to hear about your Mom's passing. Nothing can or will ever fill the enormous place she had in your life.
But you do obviously have many wonderful things to remember from the rich lifetime you shared together.
My best to you.
Andy
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Thank you everyone for your support. It really means a lot.
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Marco,
Your mom was a free spirt, artists are blessed with that
human comfort. Seems it was passed on to her son.
In the years to come, you will learn more of what a wonderfull
person she was.
~k
Bertram.
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Marco, I am sorry for your loss its such a shock when it happens without warning. Your Mama sounds wonderful a trouper you must be so proud, to succeed in her world takes courage and strength, to bring up children as well........
mhtv
been away for awhile but wanted to respond
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Sorry to hear that.
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Mecch, as you are not an LTS, you should not be posting in the LTS forum. Haven't we told you this before? I wish you would be more careful when clicking on posts from your "unread" page. Your cooperation would be greatly appreciated.
Ann
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Marco,
Your mother sounds like an amazing woman. I'm so very sorry for your loss.
AA