Author Topic: Unprotected vaginal sex risk assessment (Read 7902 times)

girlsink · « **on:** July 30, 2009, 11:14:17 am »

Hi. Well I have had 2 hiv tests. One in 2007 and one in April of this year. They were both negative. However, I need to retest because I know that the last test was inside the window period of possible exposure.

In February (or possibly March) I had sex with one guy. We were using a condom though he kept begging me to let him take it off. I kept telling him no. At some point we paused or slowed down and when he penetrated me again he told me that he had taken the condom off. I got up and left; there was probably only a few seconds of him being inside me without a condom. I went home and took a shower, not because I was thinking about exposure but because I was covered in his sweat and spit and felt violated that he had taken the condom off despite my wishes. I no longer remember whether this occurred in Feburary or March so I don't know if it was inside the window period of the test I had in late April.

On April 15, I had unprotected sex with a different guy. I was drunk but that is no excuse - I know better whether I've been drinking or not. We had two acts of PIV sex that night, and though both instances were brief (no more than 5 minutes each), both resulted in ejaculation. A few days later I began to have 1.) spotting, 2.) sore throat/swollen glands, 3.) pain with urination and 4.) muscle pains. I also had headaches, but I am prone to headaches anyway and figured they were brought on by the back/neck pain. I thought it was a UTI but they told me it was not; about a week or so later I found out I had tested positive for hsv. So I chalked those symptoms up to that. (They seemed pretty textbook.)

The Tuesday following the April 15 act is when I had the 2nd HIV test. It was more for the past encounters than the recent encounter where I contracted hsv. I have not had any symptoms or illness at all since then (although I know that that is not conclusive proof of anything either way). The encounter nags me all the time because I knew the 2nd guy was lax in his safe sex practices and the hsv infection compounded on that - making his status extremely suspect in addition to unknown.

I know I will need the second test to confirm. It's building as an irrational fear and paranoia because I know there was risk. The fear is making me prolong getting the test. On top of that, I am kind of stranded where I am now and probably wouldn't have access to a testing facility until late September. Is my risk so great that I should test as soon as possible?

RapidRod · « **Reply #1 on:** July 30, 2009, 12:01:25 pm »

Not if you start using condoms consistently and correctly. It's not like you are going to start meds immediately if you should test positive. But you do need to test.

girlsink · « **Reply #2 on:** July 30, 2009, 12:18:23 pm »

Oh yes, you're right. I phrased myself vaguely. I meant, how great is the risk that a positive result would be likely? I know you guys don't go off symptoms here, but would the fact that I showed symptoms to the hsv infection indicate that my body would show symptoms during another viral seroconversion? I've seen that Ann is online, Ann if you are around do you have an opinion?

RapidRod · « **Reply #3 on:** July 30, 2009, 12:23:09 pm »

HIV has NO specific symptoms and symptoms are never reliable in diagnosing HIV. The only way to know your status is by testing.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #4 on:** July 30, 2009, 01:22:27 pm »

Guessing about HIV status is never a good idea. Having tested negative is always encouraging. But ultimately it's the negative at 13 weeks that will really matter.

Nothng you are reporting symptomatically is in any way HIV specific. As Rod has told you, neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms will tell you anything accurately about your status.

So you have some waiting time to get through. Get productively busy with other things in your life and the waiting will pass more easily than you probably imagine is possible. As for your symptoms, if they persist you need to discuss them with your doctor.

For future reference, you can have sex with anyone regardless of their HIV status. You just need to do it the safer way, which means always using a condom for anal intercourse. No exceptions!

Good luck with your test and keep us posted.

Cheers.

girlsink · « **Reply #5 on:** November 11, 2009, 06:41:08 pm »

Hi you guys,

I guess it's been a really long time since I last posted. I have a new question about the HIV blood test. When you get the traditional test that makes you wait for the results, how long does it take before the local place where you tested receives them? How long do you usually have to wait to get the results back? If they tell you a certain time frame, does it mean that's how long it takes for them to get the results back from the lab? If you had the traditional test, if something is wrong would they call you immediately, in a day or two?

By the way Andy, I see you mentioned anal sex. I did not nor have I ever had anal sex, I don't know if it was confusing from my post or not but I am female.

Ann · « **Reply #6 on:** November 11, 2009, 06:45:11 pm »

Girl,

These are all questions you'll have to ask at the place where you test, as the answers will vary from place to place. With a "traditional" blood test, it can take anywhere from 24 hours to two weeks to get your results back. Some places will ring you immediately, others will wait until your scheduled follow-up appointment. As I said, you'll have to ask where you test.

Haven't you tested yet over your incident back in April? What are you waiting for?

Ann

girlsink · « **Reply #7 on:** November 11, 2009, 06:51:20 pm »

Thanks for replying Ann. Actually, I have tested. I tested once in April which was negative. I tested again last Wednesday. The doctor told me she would call in exactly one week - today. It's Wednesday again and I haven't heard from her. I went by the hospital and asked to speak with her and they told me she was on vacation. I also had a urine test for chlamydia and gonorrea and I haven't heard anything about those tests either. That's why I'm asking if she already knows and when she should be contacting me... she went on vacation and I haven't heard from her when I was supposed to.

When I gave blood for the test we talked about when and how I would get the results. Originally she asked me if I could come back in a week from then and I agreed to, but remembered that I couldn't because I had to work. So she asked if it was okay for her to give me the results over the phone, I said yes. She had me sign a form that said it was okay for her to leave a voicemail. She has not called at all, I know, I checked my phone obsessively.

So that's why I'm asking these questions now about when the lab sends the results back. I know when she was supposed to call me (a week) and she hasn't.

Ann · « **Reply #8 on:** November 11, 2009, 06:57:34 pm »

Girl,

You're just going to have to hang tight until she either comes back from vacation and you can get in contact, or she remembers to ring you. In a case like this, I'd say no news is good news.

Ann

girlsink · « **Reply #9 on:** November 11, 2009, 07:03:13 pm »

Thanks, Ann. That's what I'm hoping too. I've done so much reading and thinking over this one incident that I have concluded it would be very unlikely for me to actually have been exposed or to contract from that one potential exposure. I know you guys preach that statistics aren't absolute and you can't know without the test. But it's been the only thing helping me deal with this.

I hope I don't come across as one of those posters who post crazy things and hop off the wall with nonsense because I do know and understand that symptoms and other things shouldn't be trusted. However, I have had no illnesses, and I have researched the symptoms so I know which ones I should have been looking for. I have had nothing out of the ordinary. Even when my roommate had a cold and I sneezed behind her that only lasted a day or two. Also, the guy that I had the incident with that worries me has gotten a girl pregnant and she seems fine... I assume she has had HIV testing done and she has certainly slept with him way more than the one time I did. I know, that isn't proof of anything, but I think it's encouraging.

Can I ask something else? In your opinion or from what you know, does the out of state facility normally take a week or more to send the results back? Or is it possible that she's already had the results for days now?

girlsink · « **Reply #10 on:** November 12, 2009, 08:23:54 am »

The receptionist who told me she was on vacation told me that if I was waiting for test results, the doctor would have called me if something was abnormal. How long does it normally take to get results back? I am in a huge city and if they use Labcorp, there were several locations nearby. However where I tested was a big hospital with its own med school so for all I know, they have their own labs. I just wonder if it's normal that I haven't gotten the results by the time she told me.

Ann · « **Reply #11 on:** November 12, 2009, 01:29:45 pm »

girl,

Did you bother to read what I already wrote? I've told you that the time it takes to get results back will vary from place to place. You should have asked the nurse how long the lab they use normally takes. I don't have a crystal ball! (wish I did!)

Ann

girlsink · « **Reply #12 on:** November 12, 2009, 11:31:11 pm »

Well she called me back this morning. All tests negative! MAN that is a load off... I had been down and not feeling like myself since May and today... I finally felt 100% again... I felt like me again.

I just want to say for everyone out there reading these boards, the agony of testing is the worst thing. You start to get religious, or question religion, or you think you'll jinx yourself by being confident in the facts of transmission and the realistic likelihood of whether or not you've been exposed. But you'll just drive yourself crazy thinking there's a way you can psychically will yourself into a bad outcome. That was the fear of testing for me. Not wanting to allow myself to believe I was fine even though I never realistically believed I had been exposed. I'm not saying to think you're invincable. And I'm DEFINITELY not saying to have unprotected sex but "believe" youre ok - I certainly won't ever be doing that again, the certainty of knowing this, that I'm ok, will NEVER be marred again - but I'm saying stop being a fucking nutjob and thinking every sexual act you have HAS to have terrible consequences, or that feeling guilty means you DESERVE to get a disease. Stop linking sex to negativity... just be safe and live your damn life. If people weren't so concerned with being seen as promiscuous or whatever they 1.) i really believe would be more careful with protection anyway but 2. wouldn't think these ridiculous no risk situations are worth getting all worked up over. You guys are way too patient to deal with these kooks who think they will get HIV from a lapdance.

Anyway. I've read a whole lot of this message board the past five months or so and I have to say sometimes I would like to contribute to the conversations. But I understand why "neggies" aren't allowed to post and I have no reason not to respect that.

Stay up, you guys. Peace.

Andy Velez · « **Reply #13 on:** November 13, 2009, 10:18:22 am »

That's very happy news. Good luck to you.

And a great way to celebrate having scooted by safely is by committing to always without exception using condoms for vaginal and anal intercourse. As well as avoiding mixing casual sex with excessive drinking.

You made it through safely this time but you definitely cannot count on that happening every time.

Cheers.

girlsink · « **Reply #14 on:** January 03, 2010, 01:39:49 pm »

Hi,

do you guys think it's necessary to test over incidents where the condom breaks but ejaculation occurs outside the body? ie potential precum?

girlsink · « **Reply #15 on:** January 04, 2010, 08:12:53 am »

Hello?

Andy Velez · « **Reply #16 on:** January 04, 2010, 08:38:07 am »

Has this happened to you? Or is this more what ifs? We prefer to deal with specific situations that have occured.

In general I would say that if a condom breaks during intercourse the prudent thing to do is to get tested. Until it breaks the condom will have provided protection so the risk is lower than fully unprotected intercourse. But HIV status is never something to guess about so getting tested to confirm one's negative status is the way to go.

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Author Topic: Unprotected vaginal sex risk assessment (Read 7902 times)