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Author Topic: I told someone last night  (Read 8272 times)

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Offline TabooPrincess

  • Member
  • Posts: 314
I told someone last night
« on: July 17, 2010, 04:41:01 am »
I was drunk and it just came out to my friend....Now I feel all kinds of paranoia.  She was great, she cried but she was great - said all the right things and was just worried about me.  I can't deal with this today, it's just too real now that someone else knows.  She wasn't the one that I would have chosen to tell, but she was there when I needed to tell.  Now I feel guilty that I've imparted this on her and she has to deal with it and keep my secret. 

I wish I'd not told :-(
Logged
09/ 2008 - Seroconversion
11/2008 - Tested pos, cd4 640 vl 25400
12/2008 - cd4 794 vl 27798, 35%
03/2009 - cd4 844 vl 68846, 35%
06/2009 - cd4 476 vl 49151, 33% (pregnancy confirmed)
08/2009 - cd4 464 vl 54662, 32%
Started meds for pregnancy (Kaletra, AZT, Viread)
09/2009 - cd4 841 vl 3213, 42%
10/2009 - cd4 860 vl 1088, 41%
11/2009 - cd4 771 vl 563, 38%
12/2009 - cd4 885 vl 151 42%
Discontinued meds after baby born
02/2010 - cd4 841 vl 63781, 38%
05/2010 - cd4 1080 vl 113000, 39%
08/2010 - cd4 770 vl 109242
12/2010 - cd4 642 vl 111000, 34%
06/2011 - cd4 450 vl 222000, 33%
11/2011 - cd4 419 vl 212000, 24%
03/2012 - cd4 280 vl 118000, 26% (repeated Cd4 at 360)
05/2012 -cd4 360 vl 99,190
10/2012 Atripla, cd4 690, vl 80
12/2012 Darunavir, norvir, truvada, Cd4 680, vl u/d
07/2013 cd4 750,ud

Offline GSOgymrat

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,122
  • HIV+ since 1993. Relentlessly gay.
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #1 on: July 17, 2010, 09:39:53 am »
Quote from: TabooPrincess on July 17, 2010, 04:41:01 am
I was drunk and it just came out to my friend....Now I feel all kinds of paranoia.  She was great, she cried but she was great - said all the right things and was just worried about me.  I can't deal with this today, it's just too real now that someone else knows.  She wasn't the one that I would have chosen to tell, but she was there when I needed to tell.  Now I feel guilty that I've imparted this on her and she has to deal with it and keep my secret. 

I wish I'd not told :-(

Did you really expect to keep this a secret your entire life? Why are you worried about how she "has to deal with it"? You are the one who has the virus and you need to take care of yourself. Keeping useless secrets it stressful and you don't need more stress.

Accept yourself and accept the support of a friend.
Logged

Offline newby05

  • Member
  • Posts: 41
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #2 on: July 17, 2010, 10:24:39 am »
Wow!! Reading your post really hit home. That is something I worry about happening to me as well. I guess that is the true test of a friendship.
Logged

Offline bryan21

  • Member
  • Posts: 120
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #3 on: July 20, 2010, 03:05:19 am »
well u shouldnt be drinking in the first place and u really shouldnt drink cause u blab..
but shes ur friend im sure its cool chill out.
Logged

Offline jkinatl2

  • Member
  • Posts: 6,007
  • Doo. Dah. Dipp-ity.
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #4 on: July 20, 2010, 05:11:40 am »
Thanks, Bryan, for adding the sage wisdom you have to this topic.

tabooprincess, congrats. You have embarked on a full journey between shame and acceptance, with that simple act. and it's all those simple acts, glued together, that change the world.

Logged
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline TabooPrincess

  • Member
  • Posts: 314
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #5 on: July 20, 2010, 03:17:27 pm »
lol some harsh responses here!   :o

Thanks jk.  I've been through a lot over the past two years with the pregnancy and everything and kept quiet through all of it.  Spilling means a whole new phase for me - guess some understand this more than others.  I never knew, let alone met, anyone with this before and my friends are the same.

And Bryan - I've always been a pisshead, not so sure what was so different about this time.
Logged
09/ 2008 - Seroconversion
11/2008 - Tested pos, cd4 640 vl 25400
12/2008 - cd4 794 vl 27798, 35%
03/2009 - cd4 844 vl 68846, 35%
06/2009 - cd4 476 vl 49151, 33% (pregnancy confirmed)
08/2009 - cd4 464 vl 54662, 32%
Started meds for pregnancy (Kaletra, AZT, Viread)
09/2009 - cd4 841 vl 3213, 42%
10/2009 - cd4 860 vl 1088, 41%
11/2009 - cd4 771 vl 563, 38%
12/2009 - cd4 885 vl 151 42%
Discontinued meds after baby born
02/2010 - cd4 841 vl 63781, 38%
05/2010 - cd4 1080 vl 113000, 39%
08/2010 - cd4 770 vl 109242
12/2010 - cd4 642 vl 111000, 34%
06/2011 - cd4 450 vl 222000, 33%
11/2011 - cd4 419 vl 212000, 24%
03/2012 - cd4 280 vl 118000, 26% (repeated Cd4 at 360)
05/2012 -cd4 360 vl 99,190
10/2012 Atripla, cd4 690, vl 80
12/2012 Darunavir, norvir, truvada, Cd4 680, vl u/d
07/2013 cd4 750,ud

Offline TabooPrincess

  • Member
  • Posts: 314
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #6 on: July 20, 2010, 03:20:15 pm »
Quote from: GSOgymrat on July 17, 2010, 09:39:53 am
Did you really expect to keep this a secret your entire life? Why are you worried about how she "has to deal with it"? You are the one who has the virus and you need to take care of yourself. Keeping useless secrets it stressful and you don't need more stress.

Accept yourself and accept the support of a friend.


Yes.  I did expect to keep my secret until I died.  Personal choice and I know there are others who feel the same.  It's not a useless secret, it's a secret that will stop those I love being in pain.
Logged
09/ 2008 - Seroconversion
11/2008 - Tested pos, cd4 640 vl 25400
12/2008 - cd4 794 vl 27798, 35%
03/2009 - cd4 844 vl 68846, 35%
06/2009 - cd4 476 vl 49151, 33% (pregnancy confirmed)
08/2009 - cd4 464 vl 54662, 32%
Started meds for pregnancy (Kaletra, AZT, Viread)
09/2009 - cd4 841 vl 3213, 42%
10/2009 - cd4 860 vl 1088, 41%
11/2009 - cd4 771 vl 563, 38%
12/2009 - cd4 885 vl 151 42%
Discontinued meds after baby born
02/2010 - cd4 841 vl 63781, 38%
05/2010 - cd4 1080 vl 113000, 39%
08/2010 - cd4 770 vl 109242
12/2010 - cd4 642 vl 111000, 34%
06/2011 - cd4 450 vl 222000, 33%
11/2011 - cd4 419 vl 212000, 24%
03/2012 - cd4 280 vl 118000, 26% (repeated Cd4 at 360)
05/2012 -cd4 360 vl 99,190
10/2012 Atripla, cd4 690, vl 80
12/2012 Darunavir, norvir, truvada, Cd4 680, vl u/d
07/2013 cd4 750,ud

Offline shotis

  • Member
  • Posts: 31
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #7 on: July 20, 2010, 03:24:07 pm »
I second that... cause that is exactly what I am doing. If I can this will die with me.
Logged

Offline TabooPrincess

  • Member
  • Posts: 314
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #8 on: July 20, 2010, 03:27:34 pm »
Quote from: bryan21 on July 20, 2010, 03:05:19 am
well u shouldnt be drinking in the first place and u really shouldnt drink cause u blab..
but shes ur friend im sure its cool chill out.

Bryan - I hope you receive better support here for your recent diagnosis than you are giving back to others.
Logged
09/ 2008 - Seroconversion
11/2008 - Tested pos, cd4 640 vl 25400
12/2008 - cd4 794 vl 27798, 35%
03/2009 - cd4 844 vl 68846, 35%
06/2009 - cd4 476 vl 49151, 33% (pregnancy confirmed)
08/2009 - cd4 464 vl 54662, 32%
Started meds for pregnancy (Kaletra, AZT, Viread)
09/2009 - cd4 841 vl 3213, 42%
10/2009 - cd4 860 vl 1088, 41%
11/2009 - cd4 771 vl 563, 38%
12/2009 - cd4 885 vl 151 42%
Discontinued meds after baby born
02/2010 - cd4 841 vl 63781, 38%
05/2010 - cd4 1080 vl 113000, 39%
08/2010 - cd4 770 vl 109242
12/2010 - cd4 642 vl 111000, 34%
06/2011 - cd4 450 vl 222000, 33%
11/2011 - cd4 419 vl 212000, 24%
03/2012 - cd4 280 vl 118000, 26% (repeated Cd4 at 360)
05/2012 -cd4 360 vl 99,190
10/2012 Atripla, cd4 690, vl 80
12/2012 Darunavir, norvir, truvada, Cd4 680, vl u/d
07/2013 cd4 750,ud

Offline tommy246

  • Standard
  • Member
  • Posts: 435
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #9 on: July 20, 2010, 03:45:17 pm »
Quote from: TabooPrincess on July 20, 2010, 03:27:34 pm
Bryan - I hope you receive better support here for your recent diagnosis than you are giving back to others.


dont let bryan bother you princess he sounds pretty ungenuine to me and very immature. I am another who prefers to keep my health private were all different with different needs , lives , familys, jobs etc its a very personal thing . i only told my brother and wife thats the way it will stay.i love a drink as well.
Logged
jan 06 neg
dec 08 pos cd4 505 ,16%, 1,500vl
april 09 cd4 635 ,16%,60,000
july 09 ,cd4 545,17%,80,000
aug 09,hosptal 18days pneumonia cd190,225,000,15%
1 week later cd4 415 20%
nov 09 cd4 591 ,vl 59,000,14%,started atripla
dec 09  cd4 787, vl 266, 16%
march 2010  cd4 720 vl non detectable -20  20%
june 2010  cd4  680, 21%, ND

Offline skeebo1969

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,931
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #10 on: July 20, 2010, 04:06:37 pm »
Quote from: bryan21 on July 20, 2010, 03:05:19 am
well u shouldnt be drinking in the first place and u really shouldnt drink cause u blab..
but shes ur friend im sure its cool chill out.

And maybe people shouldn't be pointing fingers with dirty hands.  Dude, you need to chill out for this marks the second time you have jumped into a thread where someone was looking for support on an issue that hits home with many here.

I don't know what your problem is, but if you are going to use this place to pass judgement I have a feeling you will find it a difficult place to exist in.  You might want to adjust your attitude so you can find the support here it looks like you desperately need.

Taboo, keep your chin up sister!
Logged
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline GSOgymrat

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,122
  • HIV+ since 1993. Relentlessly gay.
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #11 on: July 20, 2010, 04:24:53 pm »
Taboo, I know your impulse to protect people. I chose not to tell my mother that I was HIV+. Like you I wanted to protect her from having to deal with my HIV diagnosis because I believed she couldn't handle it. That wasn't just my opinion but the opinion of other people who knew her. She died last year and I'm still happy with my decision not to tell her. It was a sacrifice on my part and I wouldn't have done it for anyone other than her.

The difference is I was protecting one person and you are trying to protect everyone at the expense of yourself, which is so unnecessary. Keeping a secret takes a lot of energy, probably more energy than you even realize. I'm not willing to expend my energy on a virus that is under control because that is all HIV is to me... a virus. You don't have share your HIV status with everyone, just like your wouldn't share your other medical history, but don't make it a secret. Don't give HIV that much power over you.
Logged

Offline phildinftlaudy

  • Member
  • Posts: 2,985
  • sweet Ann what you think babe...
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #12 on: July 20, 2010, 04:30:56 pm »
I am actually fairly out about my status.  I follow that belief that "we are as sick as our secrets."  Don't get me wrong, I don't run around with a banner (although, I am contemplating buying a t-shirt - but that is different story / different thread).  My friends who are around me on a regular basis know; my immediate family knows - mom/dad/brothers/sister; my employer knows.

The only reason I haven't put it on facebook is out of respect for my mother and father -- they fear that if other extended famiily members know or friends of theirs find out that they may experience stigma from it -- they are still kind of old school and live in a small town.

Me, personally, I don't care if anyone has an issue with it (drop me from your friends list on FB - doesn't matter to me) -- I don't have an option - I have to deal with it.  If they have an issue, that's just what it is - their issue.

I also respect that some people want to know as they do have care and concern.  But, I don't let anyone "boo hoo" for me --- I think that is because I don't "boo hoo" myself about it.  I'm poz, I'm happy, I'm living with it and I'm not gonna let it get me down.  Projecting that type of attitude I think has helped those who do know my status make it pretty much a non-issue.

I definitely respect each person's right to make their own decision on who they do or don't let know and the reasons behind those decisions are also respected.

Edited to fix "have" on facebook to "haven't" put on facebook
Logged
September 13, 2008 - diagnosed +
Labs:
Date    CD4    %   VL     Date  CD4  %   VL
10/08  636    35  510   9/09 473  38 2900  12/4/09 Atripla
12/09  540    30    60   
12/10  740    41  <48   
8/11    667    36  <20  
03/12  1,041  42  <20
05/12  1,241  47  <20
08/12   780    37  <20
11/12   549    35  <20
02/12  1,102  42  <20
11/12   549    35  <20

Offline bryan21

  • Member
  • Posts: 120
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #13 on: July 20, 2010, 07:49:52 pm »
well...
you shouldnt drink when you have HIV its not good for you?
and thats just how i feel rather someone take it bad is on them not me.
and its okay she told her friend if she is a true friend she will be there and not care about it
i just find it very crazy the way poz ppl act im sorry if im honest.
and yes i am immature i know that im sorry if i upset her but she shouldnt drink!!
i have told many ppl and i just found out THIS IS NOT SOMETHING YOU SHOULD HAVE TO HIDE!!!
IT DONT MATTER!!
Logged

Offline skeebo1969

  • Member
  • Posts: 5,931
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #14 on: July 20, 2010, 07:57:26 pm »
Quote from: bryan21 on July 20, 2010, 07:49:52 pm
well...
you shouldnt drink when you have HIV its not good for you?
and thats just how i feel rather someone take it bad is on them not me.
and its okay she told her friend if she is a true friend she will be there and not care about it
i just find it very crazy the way poz ppl act im sorry if im honest.
and yes i am immature i know that im sorry if i upset her but she shouldnt drink!!
i have told many ppl and i just found out THIS IS NOT SOMETHING YOU SHOULD HAVE TO HIDE!!!
IT DONT MATTER!!

Moron says what?
Logged
I despise the song Love is in the Air, you should too.

Offline bryan21

  • Member
  • Posts: 120
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #15 on: July 20, 2010, 08:10:06 pm »
someone with out morals and values say what?!?!
Logged

Offline Matty the Damned

  • Member
  • Posts: 12,277
  • Antipodean in every sense of the word
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #16 on: July 20, 2010, 08:14:28 pm »
Quote from: bryan21 on July 20, 2010, 07:49:52 pm
well...
you shouldnt drink when you have HIV its not good for you?
and thats just how i feel rather someone take it bad is on them not me.
and its okay she told her friend if she is a true friend she will be there and not care about it
i just find it very crazy the way poz ppl act im sorry if im honest.
and yes i am immature i know that im sorry if i upset her but she shouldnt drink!!
i have told many ppl and i just found out THIS IS NOT SOMETHING YOU SHOULD HAVE TO HIDE!!!
IT DONT MATTER!!

She's a grown woman. She can do as she pleases. There's no reason that, generally speaking, poz people can't drink in moderation. Even to excess, occasionally.

You might find your comments are taken more seriously if you use English rather than 1337 txt sp33k d00d.

MtD
Logged

Offline bryan21

  • Member
  • Posts: 120
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #17 on: July 20, 2010, 08:32:51 pm »
i dont give a fuck as long as the point gets across...haha
Logged

Offline Matty the Damned

  • Member
  • Posts: 12,277
  • Antipodean in every sense of the word
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #18 on: July 20, 2010, 08:33:42 pm »
Quote from: bryan21 on July 20, 2010, 08:32:51 pm
i dont give a fuck as long as the point gets across...haha

Whatever kid. ::)

MtD
Logged

Offline leatherman

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 8,614
  • Google and HIV meds are Your Friends
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #19 on: July 20, 2010, 08:34:06 pm »
Quote from: bryan21 on July 20, 2010, 07:49:52 pm
you shouldnt drink when you have HIV its not good for you?
the fruedian slip that shows you don't really know what you're talking about ;) is the question mark at the end of that sentence. Moderate, appropriate use of alcohol has no affect on HIV or hiv meds. There are plenty of medical studies that show that moderate alcohol use is actually good for you.

Moderate alcohol consumption may provide some health benefits. It may:
■Reduce your risk of developing heart disease, peripheral vascular disease and intermittent claudication
■Reduce your risk of dying of a heart attack
■Possibly reduce your risk of strokes, particularly ischemic strokes
■Lower your risk of gallstones
■Possibly reduce your risk of diabetes
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/alcohol/SC00024

of course, there are some HIV meds that may have more side-effects, and/or more severe side effects, while using alcohol (ie atripla or sustiva); but that has to be determined individually as only a small percentage of people have those issues.

Quote from: bryan21 on July 20, 2010, 08:10:06 pm
someone with out morals and values say what?!?!
"Morals and values"? That's a very subjective condemnation that you have. While you may have a "moral" issue with yourself and alcohol, and plenty of people do, alcohol in and of itself is intrisnically amoral. Unless you can state a medical issue against alcohol-usage (and I'm not talking about excessive usage or the abuse of alcohol) then you would do better by keeping your "morals" confined to your personal life rather than projecting them onto others.
Logged
leatherman (aka Michael)

We were standing all alone
You were leaning in to speak to me
Acting like a mover shaker
Dancing to Madonna then you kissed me
And I think about it all the time
- Darren Hayes, "Chained to You"

Offline bryan21

  • Member
  • Posts: 120
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #20 on: July 20, 2010, 09:05:12 pm »
okay.
i guess im going about this the wrong way!
first off yes i know that drinking in "moderation" is okay (if they say so)
but come on how many people "really" drink in "moderation"!?!??
most of the time people drink is to "forget"' or to "help" deal with something.
and the only true "issue" that i have with alcohol is that there are people out there
who are so addicted to alcohol that "without" it they would die.
and im not trying to put my morals on anyone i just dont understand how someone could think like that.
i mean on the other post who ever was talking about how horny he was? like wow really first i dont see how ppl  be such whores and have casual sex with anyone and second you found out that you have a disease that you cant get rid of from sex and your still horny? and i stand by what i said when your dick gets hard look at pictures of ppl dying with HIV/AIDS in other county because there not lucky enough to live in the US or  Europe and other places. if that dont help well then sorry.
i mean even people with HIV/AIDS still have unprotected sex i just do not get that that is horrible
i just dont get people and how they can do the things they do?
and the reason the world looks at HIV/AIDS the way they do i because of positive people hiding in the bushes.and being afraid of stepping up.and i understand why we do but you shouldnt care dont be scared! if they treat you badly then there the stupid one people dont look at HIV/AIDS logically  there is so much fear and stigma around it that people ignore it and dont pay attention to it and just look the other way they dont until they have it i just dont get people   yesterday my sister said she wouldnt go get tested because of fear! that is wrong on so many levels its not funny!       
 

Logged

Offline TabooPrincess

  • Member
  • Posts: 314
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #21 on: July 21, 2010, 02:47:29 am »
Quote from: bryan21 on July 20, 2010, 09:05:12 pm
okay.
i guess im going about this the wrong way!
first off yes i know that drinking in "moderation" is okay (if they say so)
but come on how many people "really" drink in "moderation"!?!??
most of the time people drink is to "forget"' or to "help" deal with something.
and the only true "issue" that i have with alcohol is that there are people out there
who are so addicted to alcohol that "without" it they would die.
and im not trying to put my morals on anyone i just dont understand how someone could think like that.
i mean on the other post who ever was talking about how horny he was? like wow really first i dont see how ppl  be such whores and have casual sex with anyone and second you found out that you have a disease that you cant get rid of from sex and your still horny? and i stand by what i said when your dick gets hard look at pictures of ppl dying with HIV/AIDS in other county because there not lucky enough to live in the US or  Europe and other places. if that dont help well then sorry.
i mean even people with HIV/AIDS still have unprotected sex i just do not get that that is horrible
i just dont get people and how they can do the things they do?
and the reason the world looks at HIV/AIDS the way they do i because of positive people hiding in the bushes.and being afraid of stepping up.and i understand why we do but you shouldnt care dont be scared! if they treat you badly then there the stupid one people dont look at HIV/AIDS logically  there is so much fear and stigma around it that people ignore it and dont pay attention to it and just look the other way they dont until they have it i just dont get people   yesterday my sister said she wouldnt go get tested because of fear! that is wrong on so many levels its not funny!       
 



I neither drink to forget nor drink to deal with something as you say.  I drink because it's fun - I enjoy it and I enjoy having fun with my friends.  That to me (at the moment) means more to my mental health than protecting myself with moderate intake.  I do drink too much, yes.  But Hell, we all have our vices.  Yours might be sex?  Smoking?  Gambling?  Or putting others down to make your own shattered ego better?
Logged
09/ 2008 - Seroconversion
11/2008 - Tested pos, cd4 640 vl 25400
12/2008 - cd4 794 vl 27798, 35%
03/2009 - cd4 844 vl 68846, 35%
06/2009 - cd4 476 vl 49151, 33% (pregnancy confirmed)
08/2009 - cd4 464 vl 54662, 32%
Started meds for pregnancy (Kaletra, AZT, Viread)
09/2009 - cd4 841 vl 3213, 42%
10/2009 - cd4 860 vl 1088, 41%
11/2009 - cd4 771 vl 563, 38%
12/2009 - cd4 885 vl 151 42%
Discontinued meds after baby born
02/2010 - cd4 841 vl 63781, 38%
05/2010 - cd4 1080 vl 113000, 39%
08/2010 - cd4 770 vl 109242
12/2010 - cd4 642 vl 111000, 34%
06/2011 - cd4 450 vl 222000, 33%
11/2011 - cd4 419 vl 212000, 24%
03/2012 - cd4 280 vl 118000, 26% (repeated Cd4 at 360)
05/2012 -cd4 360 vl 99,190
10/2012 Atripla, cd4 690, vl 80
12/2012 Darunavir, norvir, truvada, Cd4 680, vl u/d
07/2013 cd4 750,ud

Offline TabooPrincess

  • Member
  • Posts: 314
Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #22 on: July 21, 2010, 02:53:32 am »
Quote from: bryan21 on July 20, 2010, 09:05:12 pm
okay.
i guess im going about this the wrong way!
first off yes i know that drinking in "moderation" is okay (if they say so)
but come on how many people "really" drink in "moderation"!?!??
most of the time people drink is to "forget"' or to "help" deal with something.
and the only true "issue" that i have with alcohol is that there are people out there
who are so addicted to alcohol that "without" it they would die.
and im not trying to put my morals on anyone i just dont understand how someone could think like that.
i mean on the other post who ever was talking about how horny he was? like wow really first i dont see how ppl  be such whores and have casual sex with anyone and second you found out that you have a disease that you cant get rid of from sex and your still horny? and i stand by what i said when your dick gets hard look at pictures of ppl dying with HIV/AIDS in other county because there not lucky enough to live in the US or  Europe and other places. if that dont help well then sorry.
i mean even people with HIV/AIDS still have unprotected sex i just do not get that that is horrible
i just dont get people and how they can do the things they do?
and the reason the world looks at HIV/AIDS the way they do i because of positive people hiding in the bushes.and being afraid of stepping up.and i understand why we do but you shouldnt care dont be scared! if they treat you badly then there the stupid one people dont look at HIV/AIDS logically  there is so much fear and stigma around it that people ignore it and dont pay attention to it and just look the other way they dont until they have it i just dont get people   yesterday my sister said she wouldnt go get tested because of fear! that is wrong on so many levels its not funny!       
 



I didn't even want to dignify the second bit with a response but are you serious about the whores bit??  Perhaps you should re-educate yourself on your condition and read some people's stories on here.  Sex is sex.  It's not dirty, it's not evil, it's certainly not wrong.  If two consenting adults are both aware of the situation then good luck to them.  You either had some guilt-ridden Catholic upbringing or you're sadly in denial about your own situation and status.

Good luck to you anyway.  be well.
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09/ 2008 - Seroconversion
11/2008 - Tested pos, cd4 640 vl 25400
12/2008 - cd4 794 vl 27798, 35%
03/2009 - cd4 844 vl 68846, 35%
06/2009 - cd4 476 vl 49151, 33% (pregnancy confirmed)
08/2009 - cd4 464 vl 54662, 32%
Started meds for pregnancy (Kaletra, AZT, Viread)
09/2009 - cd4 841 vl 3213, 42%
10/2009 - cd4 860 vl 1088, 41%
11/2009 - cd4 771 vl 563, 38%
12/2009 - cd4 885 vl 151 42%
Discontinued meds after baby born
02/2010 - cd4 841 vl 63781, 38%
05/2010 - cd4 1080 vl 113000, 39%
08/2010 - cd4 770 vl 109242
12/2010 - cd4 642 vl 111000, 34%
06/2011 - cd4 450 vl 222000, 33%
11/2011 - cd4 419 vl 212000, 24%
03/2012 - cd4 280 vl 118000, 26% (repeated Cd4 at 360)
05/2012 -cd4 360 vl 99,190
10/2012 Atripla, cd4 690, vl 80
12/2012 Darunavir, norvir, truvada, Cd4 680, vl u/d
07/2013 cd4 750,ud

Offline tommy246

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Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #23 on: July 21, 2010, 08:00:31 am »
I think bryan is not even pos by his tone and at the most 14 years old.
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jan 06 neg
dec 08 pos cd4 505 ,16%, 1,500vl
april 09 cd4 635 ,16%,60,000
july 09 ,cd4 545,17%,80,000
aug 09,hosptal 18days pneumonia cd190,225,000,15%
1 week later cd4 415 20%
nov 09 cd4 591 ,vl 59,000,14%,started atripla
dec 09  cd4 787, vl 266, 16%
march 2010  cd4 720 vl non detectable -20  20%
june 2010  cd4  680, 21%, ND

Offline leatherman

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Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #24 on: July 21, 2010, 09:40:55 am »
bryan got a time-out in another thread ;) about all that "whore" and "slut" silliness he was slinging around. I would definitely guess too that he's fairly young, and it sure sounds like he either hasn't had many life experiences and/or has been affected by some sort of "religious" teachings. poor kid ;)
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leatherman (aka Michael)

We were standing all alone
You were leaning in to speak to me
Acting like a mover shaker
Dancing to Madonna then you kissed me
And I think about it all the time
- Darren Hayes, "Chained to You"

Offline Hellraiser

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Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #25 on: July 21, 2010, 10:07:00 am »
The words young, immature, and inexperienced all come to mind.
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Offline max123

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Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #26 on: July 21, 2010, 12:02:10 pm »
Quote from: bryan21 on July 20, 2010, 07:49:52 pm
well...
you shouldnt drink when you have HIV its not good for you?
and thats just how i feel rather someone take it bad is on them not me.
and its okay she told her friend if she is a true friend she will be there and not care about it
i just find it very crazy the way poz ppl act im sorry if im honest.
and yes i am immature i know that im sorry if i upset her but she shouldnt drink!!
i have told many ppl and i just found out THIS IS NOT SOMETHING YOU SHOULD HAVE TO HIDE!!!
IT DONT MATTER!!

bryan,

in several threads i noticed that you seem to frequently criticize "the way poz people" do this or that. well guess what, you are poz too. an aside, poz people have lives and come in every shape, size, color, & flavor imaginable. celebrate diversity, don't condemn it. that's the way we learn 2 roll.

max
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4/10: cd4 557, cd4% 29.3, vl 6,440
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Offline max123

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Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #27 on: July 21, 2010, 12:07:18 pm »
Quote from: leatherman on July 21, 2010, 09:40:55 am
bryan got a time-out in another thread ;) about all that "whore" and "slut" silliness he was slinging around. I would definitely guess too that he's fairly young, and it sure sounds like he either hasn't had many life experiences and/or has been affected by some sort of "religious" teachings. poor kid ;)

i bet the little fucker has barely sprouted his first pube...a time out well earned, thanks tim
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1/86 - 6/08 (annually): neg elisa
7/09: pos elisa/pos wb
8/09: cd4 560, cd4% 35, vl 13,050
12/09: cd4 568, cd4% 33, vl 2,690
4/10: cd4 557, cd4% 29.3, vl 6,440
7/10: cd4 562, cd4% 29.6, vl 3,780

Offline leatherman

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Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #28 on: July 21, 2010, 12:15:20 pm »
Quote from: max123 on July 21, 2010, 12:07:18 pm
i bet the little fucker has barely sprouted his first pube...a time out well earned, thanks tim
now, now  :D no fair beating up on him, while he's away.
i wouldn't be surprised to find out that he's just a young man parroting the things his parents put into his mind. Hopefully, after he gets a chance to really read through the forums some, he will (like a lot of us) learn that everything he was taught as a child isn't really how it is in the real world.

or not!  ;D sometimes you just never know whether someone will change or not after the reality of things have been explained to them
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leatherman (aka Michael)

We were standing all alone
You were leaning in to speak to me
Acting like a mover shaker
Dancing to Madonna then you kissed me
And I think about it all the time
- Darren Hayes, "Chained to You"

Offline Realist

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Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #29 on: July 21, 2010, 01:47:35 pm »
Quote from: bryan21 on July 20, 2010, 09:05:12 pm
okay.
i guess im going about this the wrong way!
first off yes i know that drinking in "moderation" is okay (if they say so)
but come on how many people "really" drink in "moderation"!?!??
most of the time people drink is to "forget"' or to "help" deal with something.
and the only true "issue" that i have with alcohol is that there are people out there
who are so addicted to alcohol that "without" it they would die.
and im not trying to put my morals on anyone i just dont understand how someone could think like that.

It strikes me, Bryan, that you need to get some help with your issues with alcohol. Whatever your negative experiences are from the past or however you have seen people behave who drink (in moderation or otherwise) has clearly affected you and you need to get rid of that baggage.

Now for someone so immature, with no job, no education and who had to take his sisters and an ex-boyfriend to his last medical appointment for support, you would stand in much better stead when you are permitted to re-join this community if you grew up. Just by saying at the end of most of the posts you have made that you are immature doe not excuse it and actually demonstrates stupidity. Do something about it. Get yourself out into the real world where the adults live (without someone holding their hand all day) and you might just learn 1) respect and 2) empathy.

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23/02/10 Tests confirmed
25/02/10 13100 220 24%
12/03/10 19800 372 19%
26/03/10 Atripla
30/04/10 58 286 23%
28/05/10 45 222 21%
25/06/10 UD 301 23%
24/09/10 UD 283 22%
01/12/10 UD 319 23%
11/03/11 UD 293 28%
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I blogged it all http://notdownnotout.blogspot.com

Offline max123

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Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #30 on: July 21, 2010, 10:17:18 pm »
Quote from: leatherman on July 21, 2010, 12:15:20 pm
now, now  :D no fair beating up on him, while he's away.
i wouldn't be surprised to find out that he's just a young man parroting the things his parents put into his mind. Hopefully, after he gets a chance to really read through the forums some, he will (like a lot of us) learn that everything he was taught as a child isn't really how it is in the real world.

or not!  ;D sometimes you just never know whether someone will change or not after the reality of things have been explained to them

 ;D
Logged
1/86 - 6/08 (annually): neg elisa
7/09: pos elisa/pos wb
8/09: cd4 560, cd4% 35, vl 13,050
12/09: cd4 568, cd4% 33, vl 2,690
4/10: cd4 557, cd4% 29.3, vl 6,440
7/10: cd4 562, cd4% 29.6, vl 3,780

Offline TabooPrincess

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Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #31 on: July 22, 2010, 03:37:28 am »
I'm meeting her today - I'm so nervous...I don't even know where to start with telling her everything.  I feel kinda like a fraud for not having told her before, you know like I've been lying to her for the past 2 years.  I'll let you know how it goes!!!
Logged
09/ 2008 - Seroconversion
11/2008 - Tested pos, cd4 640 vl 25400
12/2008 - cd4 794 vl 27798, 35%
03/2009 - cd4 844 vl 68846, 35%
06/2009 - cd4 476 vl 49151, 33% (pregnancy confirmed)
08/2009 - cd4 464 vl 54662, 32%
Started meds for pregnancy (Kaletra, AZT, Viread)
09/2009 - cd4 841 vl 3213, 42%
10/2009 - cd4 860 vl 1088, 41%
11/2009 - cd4 771 vl 563, 38%
12/2009 - cd4 885 vl 151 42%
Discontinued meds after baby born
02/2010 - cd4 841 vl 63781, 38%
05/2010 - cd4 1080 vl 113000, 39%
08/2010 - cd4 770 vl 109242
12/2010 - cd4 642 vl 111000, 34%
06/2011 - cd4 450 vl 222000, 33%
11/2011 - cd4 419 vl 212000, 24%
03/2012 - cd4 280 vl 118000, 26% (repeated Cd4 at 360)
05/2012 -cd4 360 vl 99,190
10/2012 Atripla, cd4 690, vl 80
12/2012 Darunavir, norvir, truvada, Cd4 680, vl u/d
07/2013 cd4 750,ud

Offline Snowangel

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Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #32 on: July 22, 2010, 08:32:09 pm »
Good Luck tonight, Taboo!!!

I really hope it goes well, if it does, it will be a load off your shoulders and if it doesn't, she wasn't a true friend.  Don't feel guilty about waiting 2 years to tell her either, you did it when you were ready or needed to(you just didn't know it :)  ) 
I recently told a friend about 6 months ago and it was a big relief.  Even though HIV doesn't make me who I am, it has made a huge impact on my choices in life and sometimes I feel like if I leave it out people don't really understand where I am coming from, if that makes sense?

Talk to you on FB and have fun tonight!!

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Of all the things you wear, your expression is the most important

The heaviest thing you can carry is a grudge..

One thing you can give and still keep...is your word.

One thing you can't recycle is wasted time.

tendai

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Re: I told someone last night
« Reply #33 on: July 23, 2010, 09:14:46 am »
Hie Princess
if she's a true friend she will stick by you. u might be pleasantly surprised. personally i havent told my friend though.  i know how she feels about it and she's educated and has her head in the right place that i know if i told her she would be ok with it. im the one who's just unable to tell her coz of my own silly reasons.  maybe if i got drunk one day and it loosened my tongue hee hee...
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