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Author Topic: Visitng Strip Clubs - HIV fears  (Read 14282 times)

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Offline kumar1987

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Visitng Strip Clubs - HIV fears
« on: July 02, 2009, 11:28:34 am »
Hi Andy/Ann,

I had been to a message parlour in the first week of March' 09. The intention was not to have sex but just some relaxation as i was having back pain but it ended up in a hand job. Want to be a bit narrative.
The massage girl  said that i could get a hand job. We did a bit of hugging kissing . I was naked and lying on her body with she wearing a panty . I didnt touch her genitals nor did i have any kind of sexual intercourse(vaginal,anal,oral).  Then she started applying massage oil on her palms and applied the same
on my penis in and out by peeling out the foreskin. She held my  penis with her two hands (thumb and index finger) and started giving the hand job for sometime and then i felt but uncomfortable and i finally masturbated. I didnt visibly see any blood in her hands(meaning like she was bleeding) and i also didnt have any cuts and i wasnot bleeding. After this act i was really depressed. After about a week i went to my primary care physician and told about this and she said that i was fine. I was still not convinced and started calling all sorts of aids hotline numbers in newyork and jersey to clarify my point and everyone said that i was not risk. I even called up a  hospital where they do hiv counselling , visted their department and talked about this problem. They siad that i had no risk. I even got tested in the first week of april (32 days after the incident) and came out negative.  My only concern is that the message girl didnot have any vaginal secretions on her hand. But what if she had small amount of blood in her fingers and that entered into my urethra or the genital. Did i put myself at risk. Do i need to get tested again at 3 months . After the hiv counselling giving me confirmation that i was not risk i continued to have sex with my wife. I'm still having fear about me having hiv or having given that to my wife. 

Please advise me appropriatley. did i put myself in risk .If at all she had blood would i have contracted hiv.

Please help me.

Offline Ann

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Re: Hand Job at Message Parlour
« Reply #1 on: July 02, 2009, 11:47:53 am »
Kumar,

Being masturbated is in NO way a risk for hiv infection as you've been told by many others. Even if she did have blood or vaginal fluids on her hands, you still had no risk.

Hiv is a fragile, difficult to transmit virus that is only sexually transmitted INSIDE the human body, as in unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse where the virus is never outside the confines of the two bodies. Once hiv finds itself outside the body, small changes in temperature, pH and moisture levels all quickly damage the virus and render it unable to infect. So, even if she's positive and even if there were blood or vaginal fluids on her hands, you had NO risk of transmission. NONE at all.

It's high time you stopped worrying about this and got on with your life. This is all about guilty feelings, NOT hiv. You had NO RISK.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kumar1987

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Re: Hand Job at Message Parlour
« Reply #2 on: July 02, 2009, 11:58:35 am »
Thanks Ann,

I'm glad to see your reply and i'm happy to see u saying that i have no risk. I've actually read other posts
by Andy saying that hiv transmission needs a receptive setting( only unprotected vaginal or anal sex).
Could you please elaborate on that. Just for peace of mind.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Hand Job at Message Parlour
« Reply #3 on: July 02, 2009, 12:00:37 pm »
Kumar,

Re-read my first post to you. I already elaborated on the issue. Hiv needs to be transmitted INSIDE the body and I already told you why. There's nothing more to add.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kumar1987

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  • Posts: 6
Re: Hand Job at Message Parlour
« Reply #4 on: July 13, 2009, 09:00:47 am »
Hi Ann/Andy,

I just need one more clarification. During my encounter with the massage girl i briefly played with her breasts and sucked her nipples but i think that i never got any milk out of that sucking. Is there risk involved in sucking her nipples. I am getting anxious as i have been some kind of tingling sensation in
my tongue  for a bout a week. I can assure 100% that i never had any kind of sex with the massage girl.
Tingling sensation is that a hiv symptom. Please help me out.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Hand Job at Message Parlour
« Reply #5 on: July 13, 2009, 09:50:38 am »
Kumar, that's more needless worrying in relation to sucking her nipples. Even if she had been lactating, an HIV+ woman's milk is only risky for an infant before its own immune system has kicked in by 6 months of age.

For an adult there is no risk in sucking nipples.

Get on with your life.
Andy Velez

Offline kumar1987

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Re: Hand Job at Message Parlour
« Reply #6 on: July 13, 2009, 10:54:42 am »
Andy,

Thanks for your reply. I'm still concerned because i have this tingling tongue and dry  mouth for last
couple of days. I looked at my tongue and it looks normal. For watever activities i had described in the forum, you and ANdy have confirmed that i wasnot  at risk . But this tingling tongue and dry mouth problem is wat is making me worry. Its been four months after maasage parlour incident , i had no symptoms of flu/vomiting. Looking in the internet for dry mouth and tingling tongue, lot of articles talk about AIDS being the cause for dry mouth and thrush. If that is the case will these symptoms come in just four months. Please clarify . I'm really getting depressed even for a small change in my body .

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Hand Job at Message Parlour
« Reply #7 on: July 13, 2009, 11:00:14 am »
None of what you are reporting is in any way suggestive of HIV, but that's no surprise since you didn't have a risk -- no matter what your head is mistakenly telling you to the contrary.  Continuing to surf the net to feed your fears is a really bad idea because you will always find more to scare yourself with...to no good purpose.

If your "symptoms" persist, discuss them with your doctor. This is not an HIV situation. Period.
Andy Velez

Offline kumar1987

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Visitng Strip Clubs - HIV fears
« Reply #8 on: July 23, 2009, 11:38:39 am »
Hi Ann/Andy,

I had made couple of visits to strip clubs and during all those vists i had received lap dances from the grils.
I have even gone to VIP room and was very close to the girls. I have played with their bodies, hugged them and kissed them. But i never had any kind of sex (oral,vaginal or anal) during those encounters.
In any of those encounters if there was some blood or blood stains invloved during kissing or playing with their bodies using hands or lips, could these activities lead to hiv transimisson thru blood. To be specific on one encounter i was having dry lips and small portion of the skin on my lips was peeled off. I did kiss the cheeks and the body of strip dancer. I didnt visibly see any blood on my lips but any blood stains on my hands /lips or few drops of blood on the strip girl. COuld they mix and this could lead to hiv transimission. Please clarify as i have been getting headaches quite frequently and it stays for the whol;e day. is non stop headaches a hiv symtom.


Offline Ann

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Re: Visitng Strip Clubs - HIV fears
« Reply #9 on: July 23, 2009, 11:44:20 am »
Kumar,

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.



As you've already been told, the only true risk, sexually speaking, is unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse. You have not had unprotected intercourse at the strip clubs, so you have not been at risk.

Kissing is not a risk for hiv infection, even in the worst-case scenario you describe. NO RISK! Not only is saliva not infectious, but it also contains over a dozen different proteins and enzymes that damage hiv and render it unable to infect.

Headaches happen for all kinds of reasons. Whatever is causing yours is not hiv as you have not had a risk for infection. See your doctor if they persist.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST OVER YOUR STRIP-CLUB EXPERIENCES, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline kumar1987

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  • Posts: 6
Re: Visitng Strip Clubs - HIV fears
« Reply #10 on: August 05, 2009, 08:38:19 am »
Hi Ann/Andy,

Please excuse me for starting this thread again. I was very much convinced that i would not get hiv from the activities that i had mentioned in my previous posts. But recently i had got a general blood checkup done by my primary care physician and to my surprise we found that vitamin B12 content in  my blood was low. The doctor is also clueless of what would have caused this. Could you please let me know if
hiv infection can bring down the vitamin B12 level in blood. I'm really very worried. Please help me.
For watever activities i had mentioned its been five months only.

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Visitng Strip Clubs - HIV fears
« Reply #11 on: August 05, 2009, 09:03:57 am »
Kumar,

Vitamin B12 deficiency has NOTHING to do with hiv infection. I suggest you do some internet research on B12 deficiency. There are plenty of possible causes, but hiv is not one of them.

If your doctor didn't discuss any of the possible causes with you, perhaps it's time to find a new doctor. This stuff is pretty basic.

For the last time, you did NOT have a risk for hiv infection. If you read the Welcome Thread before posting like you're supposed to, you will have read the following posting guideline:

Quote
Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). If you continue to post excessively after one Time Out, you may be given a second Time Out which will last eight weeks. There is no third Time Out - it is a permanent ban. The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Please consider yourself warned.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

 


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