POZ Community Forums
Main Forums => Positive Women => Topic started by: hdgirl on May 06, 2010, 11:04:46 pm
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First time posting & new to the forums so all please bare with me!
Just found out that I've been exposed to HSV2 from a man I dated for a short time that I thought was going somewhere.
Never had intercourse however did do oral on him with NO outbreak present trying to work around the HIV/HSV issues we had(he is NOT HIV POZ, I am he is HSV2 poz I was not).
He told me that oral was safe as long as no outbreak present, has had HSV2 for 8 years...but his profile read 12 but whatever...anyways AFTER the fact I read up on (retared I know, my bad) & learned that YES it can be passed this way but thought that he knew info on his std as I know on mine & know that even oral with HIV is very LOW risk unless open sores, gum desease or dental work present so never questioned until a friend of mine said it IS a risk.
Went to my Dr today for my Pap asked her & she agreed that he had now exposed me & IS def a rosk esp more so with those of us with HIV UGHH!
Problem is there is no way to test me to see unless I have an outbreak & is still possible for me to have without having one soooo appears now I will have to disclose that as well since no longer doing blood tests to check for antibodies since they have recently been proven to be inaccurate & give a lot of false positives for HSV2.
She said IF I got an outbreak could be from a week until well....whenever & the only way to know for sure if I have now gotten this...am really upset & just windering if anyone else on here has both...can I pass if I kiss another now since was oral, etc...just now need to know as much as possible about this & of course did not think to ask a lot of ?? at the Dr's today...always think after the fact of taking all in again :(
Appreciate everyones help in advance thanks & of course no longer with this person by his choice...now I guess I can understand why most date with the HIV circle...I never did a thing to put him at rsk since he was open to dating me with HIV & wanted to go speak to my HIV counselor prior to protected intercourse...gee what a guy!
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Hi HD,
I also have HIV and HSV. I got HSV a couple years ago from a man who didn't inform me about him having HSV. And he wasn't having an outbreak at the time. However, mine was passed via intercourse. I've never heard of herpes being passed through oral, but that doesn't mean much. And I can tell you, as far as I know, I don't believe there's a scientifically documented case of HIV being passed through oral. There's an element in saliva that also prevents that from happening. About HSV, dunno. It's worth investigating, though, but I personally wouldn't stress about it.
But yeah, it's another thing I have to disclose, should I ever date again. It's not the end of the world, however, and mine has been suppressed with the use of Valtrex daily. Good luck, and keep talking.
Betty
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Thanks so much Betty for your help in this matter...much appreciated!
I'm so sorry to hear that yet another has refused to disclose such important information....really saddens me :(
This is the info that a Nurse Practitioner that works in this HIV/AIDS, STD field at my local Health Dept has given me.
I guess my question now is do I need to disclose that I have HSV2 due to the fact that I have been exposed since there is NO test that can be done according to her?
Again I have not yet gotten an outbreak, which from my understanding is the only way to know for sure.
The exposure was just over a week ago & I performed oral on him twice.
She did tell me could happen anywhere from 7 days or longer but would typically happen at least within 6 weeks due to my HIV & that most likely would contract because of the HIV as well.
My CD4 is currently 670 & my Viral Load is undetectable as of January.
I just repeated my quarterly labs yesterday & will find out those results May 19th so hopefully my immune system is strong enough to possibly NOT allow me to contract.
There is only ONE documented case or oral transmission from vaginal oral & that was documented from 2 women that were lesbians & since they do not know what other sexual activity may of taken place (ie: strap ons, etc which could cause tissue irritation obviously of course it is inconclusive.
There has NEVER been a documented case or female to male HIV transmission by a male doing oral on a woman nor the opposite so really didn't think I had anything to worry about.
I did not allow him to do oral on me, he was afraid to do so anyway & he also had tongue & lip piercings (although has had them for many years) did not want to take that risk & again we never got to the point of having vaginal intercourse even with protection since he wanted to speak to my HIV counselor prior & was also unsure of the whole condom issue since he claims he has never worn one & didn't know if he would be able to perform...which again is appalling to me & I told him that he needed to get tested for HIV/AIDS as well since he had not been tested for many, many years!
I take my responsibility in this of course but for him NOT to know this info as I read both online as well as confirmed with my Dr was very upsetting to say the least esp when I contracted HIV from a man whom disclose...again my bad for not informing myself & allowing a man to take upon himself to be honest :( I really thought because he was on an STD dating site that was was informed of his STD...lesson learned the hard way I guess....I will not just have to wait & see if an outbreak occurs but again if it does not I could still become a carrier & pass it on to others without any outbreaks since there is NO way for them to tell me if I am clean.
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I have both but I've only ever had 3 outbreaks (genital) since being exposed to this 3 years ago. I think one issue is that even after exposure it can be months/years before you might have an outbreak. Try not to worry too much as hopefully if you're like me you won't have frequent outbreaks.
And welcome to the forums :-)
Editing to add that as far as I know mine was through oral because the guy I believe it came from I always used condoms with but we had very frequent oral. However, like I said above I think it can lay dormant for years so I could have got it years earlier.
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Thanks taboo as I said my main question now since I do know all that info is do I put on my profiles that I have HSV2 as well now or just wait & see what happens.
Also does anyone know IF there is any way to check to see IF I do not have it as according to my Nurse Practioner there isn't??
Thanks for helping me out & welcoming me to the forums :)
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Honestly I don't know because mine was diagnosed when I had an outbreak but there must be some blood test or something?! I've never considered the need to tell partners about it, which is perhaps very wrong of me and you've made me think a lot about this. But I'd never let anyone go near me whilst I was having an outbreak (and it bloody hurts too much anyway to let anyone near me!!!!) My partner knows and he's never got it from me as far as we're aware.
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They used to use a blood test to check for antibodies however I was told they no longer do the blood test because there were too many false positives as it can pick up other herpies type virus non related.
I guess as long as your partner knows then you are doing all you can do & he has a choice now to base his decisons being with you.
I was told that even if no outbreak can still pass because of the viral shedding that takes place 7 - 14 days prior to an out break that may or may not be detectable by someone who is infected.
Being on an HSV med does help not to pass along but not 100%...he was not taking his med for this when we did this :(
Thanks again for your help.....my best to you :)
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Here's a link to the lessons here on HSV1 and HSV2. This should help you out.
http://www.aidsmeds.com/articles/Herpes_6789.shtml
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Hi, I wonder if you're worrying a little too much about this. Why put that you have HSV2 on your profile if you haven't had an OB and can't be reliably tested any other way? The most you have been is exposed to it and that's all you need to say to any future partners if you wish. Do you think that anyone that has had a partner with HSV1 (coldsores) would inform future partners although they themselves have not had an OB? It's practically the same thing and can be passed on through oral sex too.
Anyway, I looked this up for you..doesn't seem to be common so hopefully you're ok.
http://www.herpes.com/hsv1-2.html
What if your partner has genital HSV-2 and you perform oral sex on him or her? Will you get HSV- 2 in the mouth? Given the widespread practice of oral sex (some three-quarters of all adults practice it, according to The Social Organization of Sexuality, 1994) and the prevalence of genital HSV-2 infection, you might expect oral HSV-2 to be relatively common. It's not.
According to one study, almost 100% of recognizable HSV-2 infection is genital (Nahmias, Scandinavian Journal of Infectious Diseases Supplement, 1990). One reason is that most adults are already infected with HSV-1 orally, which provides some immunity against infection with HSV 2. Another reason is that oral HSV-2 rarely reactivates, so even if an infection does exist, no one knows.
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Thanks so much for your information on this, it has helped me to relax a bit :)
I know there is a difference between HSV1 (cold sores & VERY common although have never had) & HSV2 (genital). BUT I do know that IF this has been passed to me it would be considered HSV2 NOT HSV1 since I would have gotten it from exposure from oral sex where he has his OB's correct...at least that is what the DR told me?
I guess I will just have to wait it out so far has been over a week with no OB...the Dr said would most commonly (but not always) happen within 7 -14 days after exposure so I guess may know a little more anyways after that time period.
Wishing all a happy Mother's Day <3
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I know there is a difference between HSV1 (cold sores & VERY common although have never had) & HSV2 (genital). BUT I do know that IF this has been passed to me it would be considered HSV2 NOT HSV1 since I would have gotten it from exposure from oral sex where he has his OB's correct...at least that is what the DR told me?
You can get both HSV1 and 2 genitally. It's just more common that HSV1 is oral and HSV2 is genital. So if a person had an HSV1 "cold sore" and passed this on to their partner through oral sex then that partner would have HSV1 genitally. If you were infected by someone who had HSV2 genitally then you would have oral HSV2.
So if this person was tested for HSV2 then, yes, if you were infected it would be HSV2 even though it is oral. But if he didn't know then you can't rule out either.
A point to note is that because it is skin on skin contact condoms do not always protect and it's a lot easier to pass than HIV, therefore you were taking the higher risk in that relationship.
Hope that makes some sense.
Leese
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Morning Leese,
Yes I already knew all that you spoke of & YES he knew he had HSV2...that's what upsets me so much is that I asked him of course of possible exposure by me doing oral on him & he said NONE! Now this man states on his profile 12 years...told me has had for 8 years...has outbreaks about once every 18 months...on no meds & had not had an outbreak in a while...after learning all of this I texted him to inform him at the risk he put me in due to his "lack of knowledge" about his STD when I kept him perfectly safe...as a matter of fact he was a bit afraid of intercourse with me...YES of course protected & wanted to go in with me to speak to my HIV counselor before we did so, of course I understood! YES i take responsibility for my actions of course however HE should know his STD as I know mine in order not to put others at risk..period end of story! I also asked him in my text he he would PLEASE let me know if he should have an outbreak since we have not seen each other in the following 2 weeks since my Dr said the viral shedding can happend 7-14 days prior to an outbreak but of course did not get ANY response from him whatsoever...go figure??
Like I said now I'm worried about kissing my boys, my family, etc since I do not know IF I can pass this if I do so as I always do with my family & boys...would freak me out if an OB happened after doing so & of course wonder if they NOW would get it ughhh!
That's one thing I have dealt with on the Positive Singles site are men whom have HSV2 or 1 or both typically telling me that they would be interested but too risky...I use that to educate them on HIV & YES, YES, YES have told them that I would be more likely to contract HSV2 from them, than they would get HIV from me!! But you know the ole stigma still exists so much that HIV kills ya
...HSV is just an incurable std argg!!!
This man ONLY had his outbreak on his genitals, no other areas including his mouth. Knew that all would be safe for intercourse if we so choose due to condom use since would not obviously have unprotected sex with him so thought was all ok...my first experience with dating someone other than HIV...most likely my last as he got what he wanted...may of passed his std to me but sure as hell wasn't gonna go there with me now was he :( Scary thing was & this was one reason we never tried intercourse using protection is because he claims he has NEVER used a condom & has not been tested for HIV?AIDS since he left the Navy...years & years ago! Told him he needed to be tested when we went to speak to the counselor. He told me has been 2 years for him having sex with another....hard to believe but what ever....yet told me very personal sexual issues he had in his past without me even asking so who knew...I know his past was promiscuous but the way he was with me sexually..well he could of taken or left but not sure if it was because he grew up as he put it or was afraid...who knows??
Again thanks for all your help :)