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Author Topic: i am so scared  (Read 7266 times)

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Offline helpme06

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i am so scared
« on: June 26, 2006, 07:56:42 pm »
I did a stupid thing today and i am very upset.  i am married.  i was dancing nude for a guy who is hiv positive.  he was masturbating and briefly, for literally a second or two, touched my butt, which has alot of acne.  I am very very worried that if he had pre-cum on his fingers, the contact with the acne could have caused infection.  i called gmhc and the hotline worker said it could possibly be a risk.  can you all please tell me if i was at risk and need testing!!!!

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: i am so scared
« Reply #1 on: June 26, 2006, 08:01:10 pm »
The worker at the GMHC was incorrect. Someone touching your butt (after masturbating or otherwise) will not infect you with HIV. Please read our fabulous Welcome Thread.

If you're sexually active then a twice yearly STD check up (which would include an HIV antibody test) is a wise idea. If it's been a while since your last sexual health checkup or if you've never had one at all, then you may wish to consider making an appointment at your local clinic or with your doctor. I suspect that you've got some guilt issues going on here. This particularly incident is not an HIV situation.

Take care,

MtD

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: i am so scared
« Reply #2 on: June 26, 2006, 08:25:17 pm »
help,

Matty mis-read your post. The GMHC worker was wrong. You CANNOT possibly become infected with hiv through what you describe. The rest of Matty's comments were absolutely correct.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline helpme06

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Re: i am so scared
« Reply #3 on: June 26, 2006, 09:08:23 pm »
Isn't the acne a port of entry for his pre cum ?  Several of the areas looked very red.  Ive seen websites that regard acne, rash, open sores as equal risks for hiv entry.  How confidently are you about this?  Do i need to get tested before intercouse with my wife because I dont want to infect her over a selfish act that I am responsible for !!!!

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: i am so scared
« Reply #4 on: June 26, 2006, 09:24:31 pm »
The worker at the GMHC was incorrect. Someone touching your butt (after masturbating or otherwise) will not infect you with HIV. Please read our fabulous Welcome Thread

Ann,

Where was I wrong?  ???

MtD

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: i am so scared
« Reply #5 on: June 26, 2006, 09:54:29 pm »
Please read the lesson on this site about transmission. There was absolutely no risk whatsoever for HIV transmission in the incident which you're troubled. None. Period. End of story.

Guilt is a whole other matter and I gather from what you've written you're in some state of remorse about the incident. That's a big waste of energy and it's not a tribute to your character or a love bouquet to your wife. So dump it overboard right now. If you have issues to deal with about your sexuality then I suggest you talk with a therapist or other professional to sort things out.

Whatever is going on personally for you, this is NOT an HIV situation. Period.

Cheers,
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: i am so scared
« Reply #6 on: June 27, 2006, 03:23:31 am »
Matty, Ann misread your post - she thought you said the GMHC worker was correct. It was late and Ann should have been in bed instead of reading your post through bleary eyes. Ann apologises. ::) ;)

Help,

Hiv is a fragile, difficult to transmit virus. Successful transmission occurs INSIDE the human body, as with unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse. Once the virus finds itself outside the body, it very quickly becomes damaged and unable to successfully infect a new host. This, in a nutshell, is why you didn't have a risk of infection. Not one person has ever become infected via acne and you will not be the first.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple.

Ann
(who again apologises for the earlier misunderstanding)
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline helpme06

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Re: i am so scared
« Reply #7 on: June 27, 2006, 07:11:39 pm »
from the body.com

 :(Acne can be considered a breakdown in the integrity of the skin. If blood, semen, or vaginal secretions were to get directly onto broken skin (like that sometimes seen with acne), transmission can occur, since this could allow HIV to get into the bloodstream. The more severe the acne, the greater the risk would be. However, these body fluids must get directly onto (and into) the area where the skin is compromised (broken). If these body fluids do not go directly into the broken areas of the skin, transmission will not occur.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: i am so scared
« Reply #8 on: June 27, 2006, 09:01:26 pm »
You could do yourself a big favor and stop surfing the net for more stuff to feed your fears. No kidding.

OK, so you have acne on your butt and the guy's dick touched you there. Your worrying about HIV transmission in this manner is beyond remote. It has no basis in HIV science. HIV is not an easy virus to transmit and to imagine that you're going to make a bit of history by becoming infected in this manner is frankly, nonsense.

You're a married guy and you've been doing some playing around and horrors on top of everything it's with other guys. Yikes! I suspect that is driving a lot of your fear, because it sure as hell is not scientifically valid.

Do yourself a big favor and get productively busy in your life and stop looking for trouble where there isn't any. Go ahead and get tested for your peace of mind if you must. I consider getting a negative result to be slam dunk. No kidding. 
Andy Velez

Offline helpme06

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Re: i am so scared
« Reply #9 on: July 11, 2006, 11:19:25 pm »
I got a sore throat yesterday, which rarely happens to me!!  Could this be a sign of ARS?  It's been 15 days after this incident :(

Offline RapidRod

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Re: i am so scared
« Reply #10 on: July 11, 2006, 11:23:36 pm »
No, you didn't have a risk of contracting HIV.

Offline helpme06

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Re: i am so scared
« Reply #11 on: July 13, 2006, 09:50:52 pm »
OK, this is my last post..maybe i have OCD or am psychotic..im worried because I have a very sore throat, which i never get, and havent touched my wife since i posted this question.  other than my own peace of mind, are you sure i dont need to test for this worry?

Offline Morgan

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  • You did WHAT??
Re: i am so scared
« Reply #12 on: July 13, 2006, 10:10:20 pm »
Helpme06,

You have no worries with this encounter. Period. Full stop.

But from the way you sound, a negative test is probably the only thing that will convince you.

If you find that you can't let this go, then go get a test.  Wait at least to the six week mark as the vast majority of people will receive an accurate result at that time. 

But that said, you have heard from the best in hiv risk assessment who have dealt with thousands of encounters of every sort.  Re-read their responses and with that in mind.

Hiv is not like catching a cold. It is not contagious. It is fragile and does not easily infect. 

Morgan
Morgan Landers

 


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