POZ Community Forums
HIV Prevention and Testing => Do I Have HIV? => Topic started by: a74 on October 19, 2007, 07:03:12 am
-
My boyfriend has HIV symptom showing.But he refuse to see a doctor.I'm afraid he might infect from me.I was raped few months ago.But I have not told him.So he is sure he is find.I'm crying every day seeing him suffer from this.I don't know how I should start telling him.I called the HIV help lines.They don't seem to be so helpful as they website said.They passed me on one to the others.I have to take him to get the test tomorow.He is getting weak and weak.I have no sympton yet but I'm so depressed.I wished I was the only one who suffer from all the pain and bad things not my boyfriend.
I live in London.Does anyone know where I can get advice or counselling?
I'm completely lost.
A
-
A,
There are no specific symptoms of HIV infection. One viral condition is much like another. HIV is diagnosed by identifying risk behaviours and having antibody tests performed at the appropriate time.
Is there a reason why you think your sweetie's symptoms are HIV related?
MtD
-
Hi thanks for your reple.That give me a little hope.Because I was rape and I don't know who was the guy.I woke up in a hotel.I remember that room had a strange smell.
My boyfriend feels very very weak.Start from 2 weeks ago.And got muscle pain on his back between his neck and his shoulder.He is a strong and active man.He has never get this before.He starts to smell bad from the inside of his body.Both from breaht and fa**(sorry don't want to be rude)Sometime he smell like the same smell in the hotel room.
I'm praying to God.But I was in the risk situation.And my boyfriend is sick.I'm can't change the past.I'm prepare to face it but it is quite hard.
I'm so worry.
-
A, this is all guessing. HIV is nothing to guess about. That's terrible that you were raped. And it must be a burden that you are keeping it secret. If you haven't already been tested for HIV that's something you need to do. Along with getting counseling.
As for your bf, I don't know what the reason is that HIV is a concern. Something in his history? Symptoms are never the way to know about HIV status. There's nothing you are mentioning about his symptoms which is HIV specific. If his status is in doubt then he should get tested.
AND no less importantly, if you are having intercourse he should be wearing a condom everytime until both of you are tested. Only when both partners test negative together and decide to be in a securely monogamous relationship can you make a decision to not use condoms.
Good luck with getting these matters straightened out.
-
Thank u Andy.I'm always tell him to use the condom.I bought it.For now I wonder will I ever have sex with someone again?I'd like to think positive but I'm so worry.I'm very sad to be selfish that I didn't tell him.I worry that he will not except this.I'm so scare.How would he feel if he has infect it from me.It s differenc from me.I quite except it now as I was the victim.But he'd think he has nothing to do with this.Why he has to suffer with it.I'm blaming myself so badly.
I found this web is very useful,people here are truely nice.I'm a little more brave to tell him and get the test.
Thank you so much.
A.
-
You maybe worrying needlessly as you may test negative. But either way you need to know your status.
-
Hi Andy.
I hope that it just my worry.If I turn out neg that would be the miracle gift from God.If I turn out positive that would be the lesson He want me to learn and tell the others how the hell taste.So people can choose to follow themself or follow His word.I'm going to church now.It s 3.30pm in London.I'll pray for everyone and myself.
God bless.
A.
-
Best of luck with your test. Keep us posted.
Cheers,
-
My heart is falling apart.Don't think the result will be change.My stupidness killing my loveone.I'm ready to die at anytime but my boyfriend still refuse the true.I understand him.He is not deserve this scarely thing.It is me who should take all of this.I'm asking Our Father every day to protect him.I don't want him to get hurt,I don't want him be to frightened.How can I turn the time back.How can I change the past.There is no sign that he will accept it.I can't stop crying.
I'm lost.
-
74,
I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.
If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.
Please also read through the Welcome Thread (http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=220.0) so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.
If you are worried you're hiv positive and want to protect your bf, then use condoms. If you don't know your boyfriend's hiv status, you need to be using condoms with him regardless.
You cannot find out your hiv status going by someone else's symptoms, you can't even find out your hiv status going by your own symptoms. Symptoms don't matter when it comes to hiv, only test results can reveal your hiv status.
You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.
Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.
Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.
If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.
Ann
-
Thank Ann.I had my test yesterday.But the result will be in 1or 2 weeks time.My boyfriend is getting more sick but he doesn't want to go to check.He is scared.I'm also getting very weak.Don't think it is a normal sickness.
Feeling very very bad.
A74
I'm sorry if I post the wrong place.
-
74,
Tell your boyfriend that not testing will not change his hiv status. Even if you test negative, he will still need to test if he's ever had unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse and you need to see that result before you stop using condoms with him.
Good luck with your results. Keep us posted.
Ann
-
Thank you again Ann,
This is only place I can talk to someone.I haven't told anyone.When I talk to my boyfriend about this.He got angry and told me to shut up.About having sex,I don't think it'll happen again soon or ever.I'm too scare.For now I'm trying to keep my boyfriend and myself as health as posible.
One more qeustion,just in case if he has HIV.Does exercise effect the HIV?He rides the bicycle to work and swim in the open air pool.It is very cold(5 degree)in the water.I'm worry if the disease devolop faster when poeple do the exercise.
-
74,
Get your boyfriend to test, then, if necessary, we'll talk about what is and isn't good for people with hiv.
Ann
-
Thank Ann.
I'm trying to tell him every day.may be I'll just go to the private so we'll know the result quicker.
Thank you.
A
-
Hi everyone.
I've a question.I tested neg at the 8th week.Will the result change?I'll test agian in one month time so will be 12 weeks.How many chance the result will change?
I'm so worry again.
Thanks in advance.
God bless to all.
A
-
74,
The chances that your 8 week negative will turn into a 13 week positive are extremely remote. I've never seen it happen.
MtD
-
Thank you MtD.I hope it won't change too.But the nurse called me from the hospital to make an appointment for the next test.She said they just want to follow the result and make sure.She is scare me.It make me think that the last test they wasn't sure so they need other test to confirm.I was happy for a week and now I'm back to the scarely world again.
A.
-
A,
The nurse is just doing her job. Like us she knows that you have your negative result confirmed at week 12/13.
I'm very sure you will test negative. Don't be scared. This will all be OK. :)
MtD
-
Thanks again MtD.I'm trying to stay calm and believe that everything is going to be ok.
A.
-
Hi everyone.
I've got my 12 weeks result today.It came out negative.But the doctor said I have Hepatitis B.I'm still in the dizzy day.I don't know how should I feel.Somehow doctor still worry about me and took more blood for other test.I'm trying to move on but something still holding me back.
Thanks everyone.I've learnt so many things here.And hope everyone are doing well.
A